Ask Tuxedo Man

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

do you seriously want to argue with the 'only your best interests in mind' one

Well, I mean, you can never be too sure...

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BUT IT'S NOT AS FUNNYYYYYYY

IT'S NOT MEANT TO BEEEEEEEEEE

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no talking

please answer all questions

you have fifteen minutes left

Duality you're triggering my PTSD pleas staph

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Because I already have.

You sure about that? 'Cause I still feel pretty self-deprecating...  

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You do realise I keep a collection of every last nickname a user on these forums has called me?

Well then, I suppose this one shall be a fine addition to your collection...

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[citation needed]

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Iiiiiif you say so.

Gimme dem sketchage.

Alrighty, I posted it on your ask thread.

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'Why is best pony'.

As in, 'why is best pony best pony'.

As in, 'why is Luna your favourite pony (subjectively speaking)'.

You overthink these things, methinks.

Oh, alright, I gotcha now.

. . .

Do I still have to answer? 

Quote

How nihilistic of you.

Not necessarily. I just don't believe in destiny. I make my own.

...So far it's pretty underwhelming. 

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Death? Taxes? Han Solo shot first?

I'd say the latter. Han always shoots first. Unless he gets impaled by a lightsaber...

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Platinum looks like tinfoil, so that's always an option.

Yes, but it's also considerably more expensive than silver or even gold.

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we've been over this

i ask the questions

you answer them

now what is best gemstone

I dunno man, just look at my banner.

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Would you rather have your bones broken by sticks or stones?

Well, since in this hypothetical scenario my bones will end up broken no matter what, I'll go for stones, since they'll do the job faster and therefore will be a tad less painful.

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How do the words 'predatory mustache' make you feel?

...Unsettled. Also somewhat intrigued and amused, but mostly unsettled.

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Who is your favourite poet?

An old dead guy from my country. Pretty overrated around here. You probably don't know him. Although I generally prefer novels to poems when it comes to literature.

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Have you ever read 'Calvin and Hobbes'?

Nope, never even heard of it. What's it about?

[Duality 10,740]

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

IT'S NOT MEANT TO BEEEEEEEEEE

SO IT'S JUST AN UNFUNNY GRAMMATICAL FLAW THAT YOU THINK IS ENTIRELY JUSTIFIED BECAUSE IT'S INTENTIONAL?

HERESY I SAY

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Duality you're triggering my PTSD pleas staph

NO TALKING IN THE EXAM ROOM

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

You sure about that? 'Cause I still feel pretty self-deprecating...  

Yeah, but my stats show you've kicked 17% less puppies in the last week than your average per-week kicked-puppy quota before I began my subliminal manipulation programme.

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Well then, I suppose this one shall be a fine addition to your collection...

You mean you're gonna start calling me 'this one' as a nickname?

I suppose it works well with your 'the one' as in 'TheOneGuy0000'. . .

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

[CITATION STILL NEEDED]

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Do I still have to answer? 

YES I SPENT FOREVER EXPLAINING IT TO YOU YOU'RE NOT GETTING OFF THAT EASY

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Yes, but it's also considerably more expensive than silver or even gold.

but the thieves aren't gonna know that. . .

 

 

unless they brought a loupe

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...Unsettled. Also somewhat intrigued and amused, but mostly unsettled.

Saw it in a poem.

Good one, ain't it?

7 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Nope, never even heard of it. What's it about?

I CAN'T EXPLAIN IT IT'S TOO AMAZING

GO GO GO LOOK IT UP

Spoiler

 

go go go i tell you

 

 

 

 

What is the longest you've ever waited expectantly for something?

What is the single largest amount of money you've ever physically possessed in coins?

pewpewpew?

What's the funniest thing you or someone you know has ever accidentally done?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

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SO IT'S JUST AN UNFUNNY GRAMMATICAL FLAW THAT YOU THINK IS ENTIRELY JUSTIFIED BECAUSE IT'S INTENTIONAL?

HERESY I SAY

IT'S NOT MEANT TO BE FUNNY, IT'S MEANT TO BE A LITTLE LESS DRAMATIC THAN THREE

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NO TALKING IN THE EXAM ROOM

STAPH

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Yeah, but my stats show you've kicked 17% less puppies in the last week than your average per-week kicked-puppy quota before I began my subliminal manipulation programme.

100% out of zero minus 17% out of zero is still zero.

Also, I'd like to have a talk with you about the "subliminal manipulation programme" part...

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You mean you're gonna start calling me 'this one' as a nickname?

I suppose it works well with your 'the one' as in 'TheOneGuy0000'. . .

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[CITATION STILL NEEDED]

I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT ALL OF THIS WAS ABOUT

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YES I SPENT FOREVER EXPLAINING IT TO YOU YOU'RE NOT GETTING OFF THAT EASY

Alright, but I pretty much already told ya all of this. Out of all the ponies in the show, I can relate to Luna the most. Like I said way back, "I can relate to her a lot: being forced by the circumstances to re-adapt to a world you're unfamiliar with while also being a socially awkward introvert and having serious insecurities." She's also a very interesting character, she most likely knows a lot of intriguing information being millenia old and all, and of course there's the whole NMM deal. And lastly, she tries to look imposing and be respected and appreciated while also being, as I already said, socially awkward and insecure, which to me is rather unique in happy jolly pone land. And also cute. Very cute.

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but the thieves aren't gonna know that. . .

No, but my wallet will feel it big time.

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Saw it in a poem.

Good one, ain't it?

...What kind of poems do you read?

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I CAN'T EXPLAIN IT IT'S TOO AMAZING

GO GO GO LOOK IT UP

Oh, these.

I run into a picture like the ones you sent me every once in a while, they often get a chuckle out of me. I figured by the look and format that they were from a comic book series, but I never knew the name.

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What is the longest you've ever waited expectantly for something?

I'VE BEEN WAITING MY WHOLE LIFE FOR PEACE AND PROSPERITY. THE WAIT CONTINUES.

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What is the single largest amount of money you've ever physically possessed in coins?

When I was young, I had a piggy bank filled with coins. I counted them all before spending them on a neat remote-controlled robot, it still wasn't enough, so my parents had to contribute. It's safe to say I made up for any change anyone ever owed that store.

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What's the funniest thing you or someone you know has ever accidentally done?

I sat on a pile of still-scorching-hot ash thinking it was a misshapen boulder. Coincidentally, it was also the most painful thing I've ever accidentally done.

[Duality 10,740]

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

IT'S NOT MEANT TO BE FUNNY, IT'S MEANT TO BE A LITTLE LESS DRAMATIC THAN THREE

AND LOOK AT ALL THE DRAMA THAT RESULTED FROM IT

I DON'T THINK IT'S WORKING

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

STAPH

WOULD YOU LIKE SOME ADDITIONAL PAPER FOR WORKINGS?

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

100% out of zero minus 17% out of zero is still zero.

Also, I'd like to have a talk with you about the "subliminal manipulation programme" part...

No talky about programme until you admit that you kicked five point six recurring more puppies prior to the implementation thereof than afterwards.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT ALL OF THIS WAS ABOUT

[EXACTLY. CITATION NO LONGER NEEDED]

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

No, but my wallet will feel it big time.

not if you steal them from someone else rather than buy them. . .

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...What kind of poems do you read?

Not those ones, suffice to say.

Saw that particular poem on the wall of a library as an example of so-called 'blackout poetry'.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Oh, these.

I run into a picture like the ones you sent me every once in a while, they often get a chuckle out of me. I figured by the look and format that they were from a comic book series, but I never knew the name.

SO GO GO GO ALREADY THEY'RE LEGENDARY IN AMERICA

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I sat on a pile of still-scorching-hot ash thinking it was a misshapen boulder. Coincidentally, it was also the most painful thing I've ever accidentally done.

Ouchies.

 

 

 

 

Who is your favourite user on these forums (besides me, that is)?

What is the most intentionally impressively intelligent thing you've ever said in someone else's presence?

What is the most delectably delicious thing you've ever eaten?

What is the longest period of time for which you have worn a single sticker?

18 hours ago, Duality said:

pewpewpew?

ALSO OY YOU FORGOT TO ANSWER ONE OF MY QUESTIONS

THE TRAVESTY

THE HORROR

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

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AND LOOK AT ALL THE DRAMA THAT RESULTED FROM IT

I DON'T THINK IT'S WORKING

THE DRAMA IS BECAUSE OF YOUR GRAMMAR NAZI-ISM

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WOULD YOU LIKE SOME ADDITIONAL PAPER FOR WORKINGS?

NO MORE PLEASE

I DON'T WANNA GO BACK

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No talky about programme until you admit that you kicked five point six recurring more puppies prior to the implementation thereof than afterwards.

I never kicked a puppy. Kicked dogs, yes, but never puppies. Your math is based on incorrect data, my bro

. . .

NOW TELL ME ABOUT THE PROGRAMME 

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[EXACTLY. CITATION NO LONGER NEEDED]

WAIT

I REMEMBER NOW

YOU SAID MY FAVE PONE WAS DIAMOND TIARA

HOW DARETH THEE

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not if you steal them from someone else rather than buy them. . .

...I have a feeling you do other things at night aside from building nukes in your basement...

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Not those ones, suffice to say.

Saw that particular poem on the wall of a library as an example of so-called 'blackout poetry'.

With a name like that, I wouldn't have risked checking it out. Ya never know nowadays. 

Quote

SO GO GO GO ALREADY THEY'RE LEGENDARY IN AMERICA

I CAAAAAAAAAAAN'T

I'M BUUUUSYYYYYYYYY

Quote

Ouchies.

Indeed.

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Who is your favourite user on these forums (besides me, that is)?

Why, Sunset Rose, of course. I don't stalk just anyone, you know.

Quote

What is the most intentionally impressively intelligent thing you've ever said in someone else's presence?

I cited Aristotle and Heraclitus a couple times while having a casual conversation with my history teacher about our education system. I have no idea how I managed to back then, as now I wouldn't be able to do it for a thousand dollars.

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What is the most delectably delicious thing you've ever eaten?

'After Eight'

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What is the longest period of time for which you have worn a single sticker?

. . .

...What?

Stickers aren't for wearing, silly water puddle. They're for sticking.

Quote

ALSO OY YOU FORGOT TO ANSWER ONE OF MY QUESTIONS

THE TRAVESTY

THE HORROR

THAT'S NOT A QUESTIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON

Edited October 9, 2017 by TheOneGuy0000

[Duality 10,740]

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

THE DRAMA IS BECAUSE OF YOUR GRAMMAR NAZI-ISM

exactly

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I never kicked a puppy. Kicked dogs, yes, but never puppies. Your math is based on incorrect data, my bro

. . .

NOW TELL ME ABOUT THE PROGRAMME 

no

you said i was bad at statistics

i sad nao

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

WAIT

I REMEMBER NOW

YOU SAID MY FAVE PONE WAS DIAMOND TIARA

HOW DARETH THEE

[CITATION NEEDED]

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...I have a feeling you do other things at night aside from building nukes in your basement...

yeah duh i snuggle mai plushies

what were you thinking of

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

With a name like that, I wouldn't have risked checking it out. Ya never know nowadays. 

The poem was in a youth library, pasted on the wall in large font.

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I CAAAAAAAAAAAN'T

I'M BUUUUSYYYYYYYYY

it worth it

5 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Why, Sunset Rose, of course. I don't stalk just anyone, you know.

Why, thank you, my good tux.

 

 

 

wait what

6 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

...What?

Stickers aren't for wearing, silly water puddle. They're for sticking.

And if you stick them on the back of your hand or on your shirt, then they're sticking while being worn.

What's the longest time you've ever worn a single sticker?

6 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

THAT'S NOT A QUESTIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON

YES IT IS IT HAD A QUESTION MARK AFTER IT

ANSWERRRRRRRRR

 

 

 

What is the weirdest question you've ever been asked (besides this one, that is)?

What is thy foulest foolery?

Which is better, hot pizza or buttered chocolate croissant?

Why do you not wear stickers more often?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

no

you said i was bad at statistics

i sad nao

You're not bad, you were just given (by who I don't know) erroneous data.

Now quit moping around, you're the smartest, wittiest guy I know. (which is kinda sad for me...)

Quote

[CITATION NEEDED]

"If you could have a single pocket-sized pony in real life, which one would you choose, if any?"

 

 "What a silly question. I'm sure you already know the answer to this one."

 

"Oh, yeah, you do come across as a Diamond Tiara kinda guy."

" I'll be taking one TuxPoint™ back now, thank you."

 

"I thought you handed out TuxPoints when I made witty jokes.

Such ambiguity, mein Anzug."

 

"Witty jokes that amuse and/or intrigue me, not witty jokes at my expense. Saying my favorite character is one of the most hated (before redemption) characters in the show is not witty nor a joke."

 

"Pfeh, you exaggerate.

I know plenty of people who like DT (now that she's been redeemed) and there's no call to take it as an insult if I mess with your words to imply I think you like her.

It was mostly a joke centred on subverting your expectations of me knowing who your favourite pony is and going off on a tangent about a completely different and somewhat incongruous smolhorse, anyway.

Was a joke, was witty, and wasn't 'at your expense'.

Silli tux."

 

"You're still not getting that TuxPoint™ back."

 

"[citation needed]"

 

I asked you for your tux point, and I removed it from your 'account', but at the same time I replaced it with another for another witty response. But if you hadn't made that joke, you would have had both. And I said I wasn't giving it back, despite you explaining the joke wasn't meant to make fun of me.

THERE, HAPPY NOW?

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yeah duh i snuggle mai plushies

what were you thinking of

OTHER THAN THAT

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The poem was in a youth library, pasted on the wall in large font.

...Oh.

Well ain't that a thing.

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it worth it

I'll do it as soon as you watch the episode where Ember is introduced  

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wait what

Oh, don't act like you don't stalk people who you find mildly interesting.

That's how we became friends, after all.

Quote

And if you stick them on the back of your hand or on your shirt, then they're sticking while being worn.

What's the longest time you've ever worn a single sticker?

I DON'T KNOW, A DAY MAYBE

USUALLY THEY PEEL OFF QUICKLY

Quote

YES IT IS IT HAD A QUESTION MARK AFTER IT

ANSWERRRRRRRRR

boomboomboomboomboom

THERE.

Quote

What is the weirdest question you've ever been asked (besides this one, that is)?

With all of your questions recently, I don't know if I can choose.

Quote

What is thy foulest foolery?

Again, I can't choose just one. I do silly stuff all the time to amuse those around me.

. . .

They're easily amused.

 

(nothing too crazy though)

Quote

Which is better, hot pizza or buttered chocolate croissant?

I don't like pizza too hot, just pleasantly warm, so I guess croissant it is.

before you call me a heretic, pizza is my favourite

Quote

Why do you not wear stickers more often?

I don't like stickers. They're coarse and rough and irritating, and the stickiness gets everywhere.

+1 tuxpoint if you get the reference

Edited October 10, 2017 by TheOneGuy0000

[Duality 10,740]

11 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

You're not bad, you were just given (by who I don't know) erroneous data.

Now quit moping around, you're the smartest, wittiest guy I know. (which is kinda sad for me...)

you gave me the data

i stalked you for months

watching your every move

to collect data

your fault nao

 

also no be sad tuxedo

you also smartwittyguy

11 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

                                       [citation needed] [discuss]
THERE, HAPPY NOW?

yes

11 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

OTHER THAN THAT

snore?

11 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...Oh.

Well ain't that a thing.

ikr

predatory mustache ftw

11 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I'll do it as soon as you watch the episode where Ember is introduced  

but i caaaaaaaan't

bad interneeeeeeeet

14 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Oh, don't act like you don't stalk people who you find mildly interesting.

That's how we became friends, after all.

O.O

14 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I DON'T KNOW, A DAY MAYBE

USUALLY THEY PEEL OFF QUICKLY

munsterrrrrrr

15 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

boomboomboomboomboom

THERE.

How. . .plebian.

16 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

With all of your questions recently, I don't know if I can choose.

You have to anyway.

Quickly does it, now, there's a good chap.

16 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Again, I can't choose just one. I do silly stuff all the time to amuse those around me.

You still have to anyway.

Speed it along, time's a-ticking.

18 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I don't like pizza too hot, just pleasantly warm, so I guess croissant it is.

before you call me a heretic, pizza is my favourite

heretic

18 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I don't like stickers. They're coarse and rough and irritating, and the stickiness gets everywhere.

+1 tuxpoint if you get the reference

Anakin.

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

you gave me the data

i stalked you for months

watching your every move

to collect data

your fault nao

But you only learned what my country is very recently

It's a pretty big country, y'know

Quote

also no be sad tuxedo

you also smartwittyguy

Thank you for the compliment, really, but...

What I meant is that it's sad you're the smartest guy I know by far. N-not because you're not very smart! But rather because my fellow people are incredibly dumb. 

Quote

yes

GUD

NOW BACK TO IT

HOW DAER YOOOOUUUUUUU

Quote

snore?

OTHER THAN THAT

Quote

ikr

predatory mustache ftw

. . .

Do you have a predatory mustache?

Quote

but i caaaaaaaan't

bad interneeeeeeeet

THEN HOW WERE YOU ABLE TO WATCH SEASON FINALES AND PREMIERES?

HHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM?

Quote

O.O

Quote

munsterrrrrr

I NO MONSTER STICKERS NOT STICKY ENOUGH

Quote

How. . .plebian.

Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

Quote

You have to anyway.

Quickly does it, now, there's a good chap.

Tell a bad joke that they still found funny...?  

Quote

You still have to anyway.

Speed it along, time's a-ticking.

WHOOPS, LOOKS LIKE WE RAN OUTTA TIME

CYA NEXT TIME!

Quote

heretic

. . .

Oh, how BOLD!

Quote

Anakin.

Whelp, here's your TuxPoint™, as promised.

But before you go, just remember...

I have the high ground.

 

 

WAIT YOU DIDN'T ASK ME ANY QUESTIONS

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU

WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

DUALITY WHY

[Duality 10,740]

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

But you only learned what my country is very recently

that's what you think

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

         [citation needed] [discuss]
GUD

                              [citation needed] [discuss]
NOW BACK TO IT

                                                     [citation needed] [discuss]
HOW DAER YOOOOUUUUUUU

like a boss dur

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

OTHER THAN THAT

and this don't got none disturbing implications at all

nosirree

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

Do you have a predatory mustache?

Of course.

Not on me, though. . .

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

THEN HOW WERE YOU ABLE TO WATCH SEASON FINALES AND PREMIERES?

HHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM?

WITH GREAT PAIN AND ANGST AND LAG AND PAUSING VIDEOS TO WAIT FOR THEM TO LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I NO MONSTER STICKERS NOT STICKY ENOUGH

get better ones

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

i never kid

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Whelp, here's your TuxPoint™, as promised.

But before you go, just remember...

I have the high ground.

google is mai bestest fwend rn

4 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

WAIT YOU DIDN'T ASK ME ANY QUESTIONS

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU

WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

DUALITY WHY

WELLL I COULD SAY THAT IT WAS BECAUSE YOU HADN'T ANSWERED THOSE OTHER TWO YET

BUT I'M GONNA BE HONEST AND SAY I COMPLETELY FORGOT

TOLD YOU I WASN'T PERFECT

 

 

 

 

What's the most interesting thing you've ever found at a beach?

What's the creepiest thing you've ever found at a beach?

What's the most interesting/thought-provoking question you've ever heard?

What's the coolest pen/pencil/writing implement you've ever seen?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

that's what you think

. . .

Quote

like a boss dur

This slang causes me great pain

Quote

and this don't got none disturbing implications at all

nosirree

JUST SAY IT ALREADY

Quote

Of course.

Not on me, though. . .

So, what, do you keep it in a box in the basement?

Quote

WITH GREAT PAIN AND ANGST AND LAG AND PAUSING VIDEOS TO WAIT FOR THEM TO LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD

DO THAT FOR EMBEEEEEEEEEEER

SHE DESERVES IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

Quote

get better ones

but I don't need stickers

Quote

i never kid

Quit badmouthing young goats, you meanie

Quote

google is mai bestest fwend rn

. . .

GIVE IT BACK.

Quote

WELLL I COULD SAY THAT IT WAS BECAUSE YOU HADN'T ANSWERED THOSE OTHER TWO YET

BUT I'M GONNA BE HONEST AND SAY I COMPLETELY FORGOT

TOLD YOU I WASN'T PERFECT

IT'S OK I DID IT A COUPLE OF TIMES AS WELL RECENTLY

BUSY WEEK EH

Quote

What's the most interesting thing you've ever found at a beach?

A living tiny crab

Might not seem like much, but they're pretty rare around here

Quote

What's the creepiest thing you've ever found at a beach?

THE CRAB

IT LIVES

Quote

What's the most interesting/thought-provoking question you've ever heard?

'But what if Shr3k is not kill???'

Quote

What's the coolest pen/pencil/writing implement you've ever seen?

A weird key-chain-compass(the drawing tool)-knife-flashlight-screwdriver

I actually wanted to buy it, but I never got around to it.

[Duality 10,740]

21 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

This slang causes me great pain

WELL DUUUURRRRRR

21 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

JUST SAY IT ALREADY

say the disturbing implication?

21 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

So, what, do you keep it in a box in the basement?

No, I keep it in a cage.

 

Spoiler

that comeback came to me like a bolt of lightning when i read your sentence 

 

23 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

DO THAT FOR EMBEEEEEEEEEEER

SHE DESERVES IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

No, she deserves the excruciating wait until her season boxset comes out, that I may truly appreciate her in all her glory.

24 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

but I don't need stickers

but you do

stickers sparkly

25 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Quit badmouthing young goats, you meanie

but i never

25 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

GIVE IT BACK.

nope

mine nao

and let that be a lesson to you

25 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

IT'S OK I DID IT A COUPLE OF TIMES AS WELL RECENTLY

BUSY WEEK EH

More like 'just woke up'.

26 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

THE CRAB

IT LIVES

you stitched it together from tiny crab pieces and electrified it into undeath, didn't you.

27 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

'But what if Shr3k is not kill???'

WELL THANKS FOR MY IMMINENT SLEEPLESS NIGHTS

28 minutes ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

A weird key-chain-compass(the drawing tool)-knife-flashlight-screwdriver

I actually wanted to buy it, but I never got around to it.

do et

do et nao

 

 

 

 

In what ways are you extroverted?

In what ways are you introverted?

How much Latin do you know?

What is the most interesting/thought-provoking piece of art that you've ever seen?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

WELL DUUUURRRRRR

DUALITY STOP THIS IS WORSE THAN THE EXAM FLASHBACKS

Quote

say the disturbing implication?

No, ya goof, tell me what else you do at night

You know what I'm talking about

The stealy-steal

Quote

No, I keep it in a cage.

I suppose that's a little more reassuring.

Quote

that comeback came to me like a bolt of lightning when i read your sentence  

I have a feeling I'll be using this a lot.

Quote

No, she deserves the excruciating wait until her season boxset comes out, that I may truly appreciate her in all her glory.

HASBROOO WHY YOU NO MAKE EMBER MEEEEEEERCH

Quote

but you do

stickers sparkly

Certainly enticing, but still not a good enough reason

Quote

nope

mine nao

and let that be a lesson to you

*sigh*

FINE

How many do you have, anyway?

Quote

you stitched it together from tiny crab pieces and electrified it into undeath, didn't you.

. . .

Pff, what? Of course not!

Quote

WELL THANKS FOR MY IMMINENT SLEEPLESS NIGHTS

NONE SHALL SURVIVE THE WRATH OF THE OGRELORD

Quote

do et

do et nao

It was years ago. I doubt they still sell them.

Quote

In what ways are you extroverted?

I suppose once I'm familiar with people I try to seem 'chill' and make them laugh, which is something not many 'extreme' introverts would do. It's to try to make them like me, but also to make myself feel better, as well. It's always nice to be able to talk to someone when you're suffering trough the same thing together. Makes it a lot easier.

Quote

In what ways are you introverted?

I don't particularly enjoy opening up to people, and I tend to be very skeptical and careful around strangers. I generally prefer being alone, or with very old, close friends.

Quote

How much Latin do you know?

Much less than you probably think I do. A few words, and a couple of sayings that pretty much everyone knows. English has always been my main focus when it came to learning other languages.

Quote

What is the most interesting/thought-provoking piece of art that you've ever seen?

'The Persistence of Memory', by artist Salvador Dali

[Duality 10,740]

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

DUALITY STOP THIS IS WORSE THAN THE EXAM FLASHBACKS

If you write 'dur' in response to any of your questions, you will be severely penalised.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

No, ya goof, tell me what else you do at night

You know what I'm talking about

The stealy-steal

this nudge-nudge-wink-winking greatly disturbs me

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I suppose that's a little more reassuring.

Not if you see what it does to the bars.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I have a feeling I'll be using this a lot.

Could do with more moustache.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

HASBROOO WHY YOU NO MAKE EMBER MEEEEEEERCH

*commiserates with*

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Certainly enticing, but still not a good enough reason

They're sticky and they're sparkly.

Better than your reasons not to wear them.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

*sigh*

FINE

How many do you have, anyway?

I honestly think I have three already, but I'm by no means certain.

I should've kept a tally or something.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

Pff, what? Of course not!

that's what they all say

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

It was years ago. I doubt they still sell them.

If there's one thing I've learnt about general stores, it's that multitools are eternal.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Much less than you probably think I do.

Don't make assumptions about my assumptions.

It's hardly like I know any ancient Anglo-Saxon.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

A few words, and a couple of sayings that pretty much everyone knows.

There are many, many, non-literate people in this world, Tux.

I guarantee you that no-one in my entire neighbourhood could tell me a single Latin phrase off the top of their head.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

'The Persistence of Memory', by artist Salvador Dali

ahhh teh clockz

 

 

 

 

What's your favourite historical event?

What's the oldest/smelliest/mouldiest piece of food you've ever found behind a piece of furniture?

What is your current opinion of yourself (5 marks)?

How has your opinion of yourself changed over the course of your life (5 marks)?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

If you write 'dur' in response to any of your questions, you will be severely penalised.

. . .

DUALITY WHY

Quote

this nudge-nudge-wink-winking greatly disturbs me

Quote

Not if you see what it does to the bars.

So what are you planning to do with it, anyway?

Quote

Could do with more moustache.

WILLY WONKA WITH A MOUSTACHE

HOW DARE YOU EVEN SUGGEST THAT

Quote

They're sticky and they're sparkly.

Better than your reasons not to wear them.

BUT WHO WEARS STICKERS

Quote

I honestly think I have three already, but I'm by no means certain.

I should've kept a tally or something.

Three or four, I'd say. Are you keeping them to get the...  *ahem*...  special one?

Quote

that's what they all say

I ensure you, the crab was in one piece when I found it. As for the 'alive' part... well, I, uh...

Quote

If there's one thing I've learnt about general stores, it's that multitools are eternal.

Of course, but that exact same one? Quite unlikely.

Quote

Don't make assumptions about my assumptions.

It's hardly like I know any ancient Anglo-Saxon.

Just ad "th" at the end of verbs and use "thee", "thine" and "thou".

Quote

There are many, many, non-literate people in this world, Tux.

I guarantee you that no-one in my entire neighbourhood could tell me a single Latin phrase off the top of their head.

Fair enough, but your neighbors didn't descend from a latin-speaking nation

Quote

What's your favourite historical event?

The Apocalypse. Still waiting...

A more serious answer would be the discovery of America

Quote

What's the oldest/smelliest/mouldiest piece of food you've ever found behind a piece of furniture?

A seemingly-ancient moldy corner of bread.

Quote

What is your current opinion of yourself (5 marks)?

Very self-conscious, socially awkward, lonely, a tad self-deprecating, and somewhat compassionate.

STOP IT WITH THE EXAM REFERENCES

Quote

How has your opinion of yourself changed over the course of your life (5 marks)?

A lot and quite often when I was younger, not much recently.

STAPH

[Duality 10,740]

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

DUALITY WHY

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Methinks you answered your own question here.

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

So what are you planning to do with it, anyway?

I'm currently breeding it for world takeover.

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

WILLY WONKA WITH A MOUSTACHE

HOW DARE YOU EVEN SUGGEST THAT

BECAUSE FREEDOM OF SPEECH YOU DEMOCRACY SUPPRESSOR

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

BUT WHO WEARS STICKERS

my mum really likes wearing stickers

what are you saying about my mum

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Three or four, I'd say. Are you keeping them to get the...  *ahem*...  special one?

Nah, gimme sketchage with 1 point change.

Same as previous order, but not Rarity because you've already drawn her for me.

Please.

And thank you.

*pats head patronisingly*

 

 

 

also I just noticed that you signed that rarity pic with your real name

don't let me stop you from signing your pictures like that - consistency must be upheld after all - but could you give meh a double-up version of each pic with the only change being a more tuxedoey signature?

just so i have something to remember you by. . .*melancholy violin music starts up in background*. . .forever and always

also because genuine variant-artworks are always more valuable collector's items than the originals

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I ensure you, the crab was in one piece when I found it. As for the 'alive' part... well, I, uh...

mmm-hmmm, you just continue that sentence. . .

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Of course, but that exact same one? Quite unlikely.

That exact same make and model of multitool is fairly likely for you to find, actually, unless the producing company's gone bankrupt or something.

Mass-production goods in circulation tend to stay in circulation, seeing as it's usually cheaper to keep production lines rolling than it is to decommission them or alter their output.

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Just ad "th" at the end of verbs and use "thee", "thine" and "thou".

That's not Anglo-Saxon, it's Old English.

More Victorian-era than Viking-era.

Such slanderous lies.

How dare you, you monster.

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Fair enough, but your neighbors didn't descend from a latin-speaking nation

How do you know?

Such assumptions, mein Anzug.

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

The Apocalypse. Still waiting...

A more serious answer would be the discovery of America

By whom?

The original settlers or those British losers?

16 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Very self-conscious, socially awkward, lonely, a tad self-deprecating, and somewhat compassionate.

A 'tad', now, hmm?

 

 

 

What are your thoughts on flat-earth conspiracy theorists?

What are your thoughts on Einstein (the person, not his theories)?

What are your thoughts on [insert random celebrity here]?

What are your thoughts on [insert random person you've met at some point in your life]?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

Methinks you answered your own question here.

. . .

HOW DARE YOU USE MY ORIGINAL MEMES AGAINST ME

DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO THAT IS?

Quote

I'm currently breeding it for world takeover.

...Well ain't that reassuring.

Quote

BECAUSE FREEDOM OF SPEECH YOU DEMOCRACY SUPPRESSOR

NOBODY DISRESPECTS THE WONKAAAAAAAAAA

Quote

my mum really likes wearing stickers

what are you saying about my mum

Good for her, I guess?

Quote

Nah, gimme sketchage with 1 point change.

Same as previous order, but not Rarity because you've already drawn her for me.

Please.

And thank you.

*pats head patronisingly*

So I decided to try an angle that I'm not familiar with at all

and surprise surprise...

Spoiler

IT'S AWFUL

I HATE IT WITH A PASSION

WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF

I DIDN'T EVEN CONSIDER FINISHING IT, I DIDN'T EVEN SIGN IT AT ALL

I'M SORRY

I FAILED YOU ALL

NEVER AGAIN

Quote

mmm-hmmm, you just continue that sentence. . .

I-it wasn't moving, I just... splashed some water on it...  the-there may have been some electricity involved... but I didn't do anything illegal! I hope.

Quote

That exact same make and model of multitool is fairly likely for you to find, actually, unless the producing company's gone bankrupt or something.

Mass-production goods in circulation tend to stay in circulation, seeing as it's usually cheaper to keep production lines rolling than it is to decommission them or alter their output.

It wasn't there anymore last time I checked...

Quote

That's not Anglo-Saxon, it's Old English.

More Victorian-era than Viking-era.

Such slanderous lies.

How dare you, you monster.

Why would you want to learn the viking language? So brutal, so barbaric. Who's the real monster here, hhmmm?

Quote

How do you know?

Such assumptions, mein Anzug.

Well, you don't live in Europe, the British isles, or America, so it's quite unlikely.

Unless you live in Canada or Australia and they moved from France or something.

Quote

By whom?

The original settlers or those British losers?

Columbus and (what was left of) his gang of blind people who couldn't tell this place they found wasn't India.

But I guess 'America' does sound better than 'Columbia' for the name of a country...   Curse you Vespucci!

Quote

A 'tad', now, hmm?

A bit of an understatement, I know.

Quote

What are your thoughts on flat-earth conspiracy theorists?

Bored people looking for something mildly interesting to worry about, or just outright bonkers people. Either way, can't really blame them. Just don't go preaching that stuff around too much, the average person is dumb enough as it is.

Quote

What are your thoughts on Einstein (the person, not his theories)?

The stereotypical eccentric genius (he created this concept). A forgetful, messy yet formidable goofball. Who could ever hate him?

Quote

What are your thoughts on [insert random celebrity here]?

I find most celebrities nowadays to be very superficial. Very few care about being original or becoming a better musician, and it's driving the industry towards a bland, obnoxious place. I'm just curious what they'll call this 'era' of music a couple decades from now...

Quote

What are your thoughts on [insert random person you've met at some point in your life]?

He's by far the nicest, most self-sacrificial guy around. He's not the most intelligent, but you just can't ever get mad at a person like him. If I ever wanted to have a roommate, it would be him.

Edited October 16, 2017 by TheOneGuy0000

[Duality 10,740]

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

HOW DARE YOU USE MY ORIGINAL MEMES AGAINST ME

DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO THAT IS?

I probably don't even want to know.

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...Well ain't that reassuring.

Thank you, I try.

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

NOBODY DISRESPECTS THE WONKAAAAAAAAAA

i iz teh wonka

i do whud i wan'

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Good for her, I guess?

EXACTLY

VERY VERY GOOD FOR HER

BECAUSE STICKERS ARE SPARKLY AND STICKY

AND YOU TOO CAN BE JUST LIKE MY MOTHER WITH JUST A FORTNIGHTLY PAYMENT OF $1.99 DIRECT BY CASH TO THE INTERNATIONAL STICKER CORPORATION

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

So I decided to try an angle that I'm not familiar with at all

and surprise surprise...

  Reveal hidden contents

IT'S AWFUL

I HATE IT WITH A PASSION

WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF

I DIDN'T EVEN CONSIDER FINISHING IT, I DIDN'T EVEN SIGN IT AT ALL

I'M SORRY

I FAILED YOU ALL

NEVER AGAIN

That's an angle that you're not familiar with at all?

Colour me honestly surprise-surprised.

Spoiler

this is amazing

better even than your full-colour rarity

her limpid eyes

her show-accurate snoot

remember what they say

the customer is always right

especially when they know where you live

if you don't finish this sketch and colour it for me i will end you

IT'S ADORABLE

I LOVE IT WITH A PASSION

WHY DID YOU SAY THESE THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF

I NEED YOU TO FINISH IT, I NEED YOU TO SIGN IT TWICE OVER

DON'T BE SORRY

YOU DID THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF FAILING US ALL

DO IT AGAIN

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I-it wasn't moving, I just... splashed some water on it...  the-there may have been some electricity involved... but I didn't do anything illegal! I hope.

You 'just' splashed some water on it?

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD THE SMELL OF DEAD CRAB IS TO CONDITION OUT OF ONE'S EDDY CURRENTS

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

It wasn't there anymore last time I checked...

YOU CHECKED WRONG

TRY AGAIN

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Why would you want to learn the viking language? So brutal, so barbaric. Who's the real monster here, hhmmm?

The Viking language actually lent a lot of itself to late Anglo-Saxon.

Which in turn formed the basis of the English language.

Which you wanted to learn so bad that you now converse fluently in it better than most natural speakers.

Who's the real monster here, hhmmm?

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Well, you don't live in Europe, the British isles, or America, so it's quite unlikely.

I assume you have concrete reasoning behind this 'you don't live in Europe' dealio.

British Isles and America I state freely that I don't live in, but Europe?

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

A bit of an understatement, I know.

A 'bit', now, hmm?

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

The stereotypical eccentric genius (he created this concept). A forgetful, messy yet formidable goofball. Who could ever hate him?

His quotes are simply glorious. Observe:

"I never made one of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking"

"Never memorize something that you can look up"

"Black holes are where God divided by zero"

"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax"

"I have reached an age where if someone tells me to wear socks, I don't have to"

3 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

He's by far the nicest, most self-sacrificial guy around. He's not the most intelligent, but you just can't ever get mad at a person like him. If I ever wanted to have a roommate, it would be him.

The implication was that you would specify the random person in question.

Who is this, now?

 

 

 

Who is your favourite superhero?

What is the longest cylindrical object you own?

What is the largest oblong object you own?

What is the tallest triangular object you own?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

I probably don't even want to know.

. . .

...You're probably right.

Quote

Thank you, I try.

So this is how it ends, huh? No mushroom cloud, no blinding light, just...   savage mustaches...

Quote

i iz teh wonka

i do whud i wan'

THAT'S NOT HOW THE WONKA SPEAKS

HERETIC

Quote

AND YOU TOO CAN BE JUST LIKE MY MOTHER WITH JUST A FORTNIGHTLY PAYMENT OF $1.99 DIRECT BY CASH TO THE INTERNATIONAL STICKER CORPORATION

...I knew you were just trying to sell me stuff.

Quote

That's an angle that you're not familiar with at all?

Colour me honestly surprise-surprised.

Well, it's easy to tell generation 4 ponies weren't particularly designed to be seen from the front. Even the show tends to avoid it. It's tedious, and it often looks weird (ex.: the royal sisters due to their ethereal manes, Ember etc.) I try to avoid it as much as possible, myself.

Quote

this is amazing

better even than your full-colour rarity

her limpid eyes

her show-accurate snoot

remember what they say

the customer is always right

especially when they know where you live

if you don't finish this sketch and colour it for me i will end you

-------------------------------

IT'S ADORABLE

I LOVE IT WITH A PASSION

WHY DID YOU SAY THESE THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF

I NEED YOU TO FINISH IT, I NEED YOU TO SIGN IT TWICE OVER

DON'T BE SORRY

YOU DID THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF FAILING US ALL

DO IT AGAIN

While I truly appreciate your compliments, and your, um... threats...  I'm simply not happy with it. Maybe a few more adjustments...  but that would just be a waste of time, I'd be better off starting over completely. Perhaps one day I'll attempt to 're-make' it, but for now, into the folder of the damned it goes...

Quote

You 'just' splashed some water on it?

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD THE SMELL OF DEAD CRAB IS TO CONDITION OUT OF ONE'S EDDY CURRENTS

I'm... not quite sure what that's supposed to mean...

Quote

The Viking language actually lent a lot of itself to late Anglo-Saxon.

Which in turn formed the basis of the English language.

Which you wanted to learn so bad that you now converse fluently in it better than most natural speakers.

Who's the real monster here, hhmmm?

You are.

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE COMING DID YA

Quote

I assume you have concrete reasoning behind this 'you don't live in Europe' dealio.

British Isles and America I state freely that I don't live in, but Europe?

Wasn't that the first option you crossed out when I mentioned living there? 

Quote

A 'bit', now, hmm?

...Yes. 

Quote

His quotes are simply glorious. Observe:

"I never made one of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking"

"Never memorize something that you can look up"

"Black holes are where God divided by zero"

"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax"

"I have reached an age where if someone tells me to wear socks, I don't have to"

WHY DO PEOPLE NOT LISTEN TO EINSTEIN MORE OFTEN

THE WORLD WOULD BE SO MUCH BETTER

Quote

The implication was that you would specify the random person in question.

Who is this, now?

Ah, just an old classmate of mine. Such a nice kid, very few like him around here. In fact, he's the only one I know who is so genuine and friendly. I still see him around sometimes...

Quote

Who is your favourite superhero?

Seriously!?

IRON MAN

IRON MAN

IRON MAN

Quote

What is the longest cylindrical object you own?

It's this odd paper-block-holder that I never use...

Quote

What is the largest oblong object you own?

...My bed, I guess.

Quote

What is the tallest triangular object you own?

That'd be my large drafting triangle.

[Duality 10,740]

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

So this is how it ends, huh? No mushroom cloud, no blinding light, just...   savage mustaches...

Try option D.

All of the above.

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

THAT'S NOT HOW THE WONKA SPEAKS

HERETIC

I IZ TEH WONKA

I DO WHUD I WAN'

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...I knew you were just trying to sell me stuff.

Nuclear parts, anyone?

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

While I truly appreciate your compliments, and your, um... threats...  I'm simply not happy with it. Maybe a few more adjustments...  but that would just be a waste of time, I'd be better off starting over completely.

But I want it.

I actually want it.

I legitimately, desirously, want it.

I want you to colour it and sign it and give it to me.

Otherwise I'll just have an adorable half-finished sketch of Twilight just sitting in my favourites folder labelled "Unfinished, by TheOneGuy0000".

LISTEN TO ME, TUX.

IT IS A GOOD SKETCH.

IT IS A VERY GOOD SKETCH.

IT IS AN EXTREMELY GOOD SKETCH.

TAKE THESE AS THE WORDS OF A FELLOW ABSURDLY-HIGH-STANDARDS ART COLLECTOR.

IT. IS. A. GOOD. SKETCH.

NONE OF THIS 'nope.png' FILENAMING

IT IS AS FABULOUS, IF NOT MORE SO, THAN THE 'fabulous.png' YOU DID OF RARITY.

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I'm... not quite sure what that's supposed to mean...

You drenched an innocent swirl of water with the stench of dead crab.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

You are.

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE COMING DID YA

no you

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #REBURNEEEEEEEED

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Wasn't that the first option you crossed out when I mentioned living there? 

I'm not entirely sure what you're referring to.

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

WHY DO PEOPLE NOT LISTEN TO EINSTEIN MORE OFTEN

THE WORLD WOULD BE SO MUCH BETTER

He was actually officially offered presidency of Israel at one point (he was Israeli by nationality, interestingly enough), but declined it.

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Ah, just an old classmate of mine. Such a nice kid, very few like him around here. In fact, he's the only one I know who is so genuine and friendly. I still see him around sometimes...

Give him a hug from Duality. <3

2 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Seriously!?

IRON MAN

IRON MAN

IRON MAN

okay then we get it

groupie

 

 

 

 

How many milligrams of iron do you estimate there are currently in your body?

How many of those milligrams of iron do you estimate you got from licking electric fences?

How many of those milligrams of iron do you estimate you got from being injected with rusty anaesthetic needles at the dentist?

How many of those milligrams of iron do you estimate you got by getting swagliciously impaled by Merlin using Excalibur when he TARDIS-time-travelled to the 18th century and turned out to be the heretofore-unknown son of the 61st Doctor and a half-Dalek version of the Terminator?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

Try option D.

All of the above.

Congratulations, you've somehow managed to make this even more terrifying! 

Quote

I IZ TEH WONKA

I DO WHUD I WAN'

Oompa-loompas, charge! SLAY THE IMPOSTER!

Quote

Nuclear parts, anyone?

I HAVE 20 DOLLARS MAN

Quote

But I want it.

I actually want it.

I legitimately, desirously, want it.

I want you to colour it and sign it and give it to me.

Otherwise I'll just have an adorable half-finished sketch of Twilight just sitting in my favourites folder labelled "Unfinished, by TheOneGuy0000".

LISTEN TO ME, TUX.

IT IS A GOOD SKETCH.

IT IS A VERY GOOD SKETCH.

IT IS AN EXTREMELY GOOD SKETCH.

TAKE THESE AS THE WORDS OF A FELLOW ABSURDLY-HIGH-STANDARDS ART COLLECTOR.

IT. IS. A. GOOD. SKETCH.

NONE OF THIS 'nope.png' FILENAMING

IT IS AS FABULOUS, IF NOT MORE SO, THAN THE 'fabulous.png' YOU DID OF RARITY.

sigh

Very well. I shall try and squeeze some decency out of that horrid thing, just for your sake. However, do know that it could take some time.

Quote

You drenched an innocent swirl of water with the stench of dead crab.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Oh. Oh. Um...  my bad? 

Sometimes I forget that you're related to literally all water in the universe.

Quote

no you

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #REBURNEEEEEEEED

. . .

IT APPEARS THAT I HAVE MADE A MISTAKE.

Quote

I'm not entirely sure what you're referring to.

The first time I jokingly suggested flying over to hug you, you said you don't live in Europe, remember?

PLEASE DON'T SAY [CITATION NEEDED]

THIS IS NOT REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY

PLEASE

Quote

He was actually officially offered presidency of Israel at one point (he was Israeli by nationality, interestingly enough), but declined it.

If I were him I would have gone straight for God Emperor of the World

Quote

Give him a hug from Duality. <3

That...  would be a little random, dontcha think?

Besides, I have a 'tuff guy' reputation to uphold.

Quote

okay then we get it

groupie

First you forget who my favorite superhero is, then you insult me? So mean...  

Quote

How many milligrams of iron do you estimate there are currently in your body?

Truth be told, I haven't got the slightest clue. I'll say 5.

Quote

How many of those milligrams of iron do you estimate you got from licking electric fences?

I never licked an electric fence, pretty sure I'd be dead/have some serious brain damage. So 0.0%

Quote

How many of those milligrams of iron do you estimate you got from being injected with rusty anaesthetic needles at the dentist?

. . .

Hopefully also 0.0%

I like to thing I get all the iron I need from food, and not infectious sharp objects  

Quote

How many of those milligrams of iron do you estimate you got by getting swagliciously impaled by Merlin using Excalibur when he TARDIS-time-travelled to the 18th century and turned out to be the heretofore-unknown son of the 61st Doctor and a half-Dalek version of the Terminator?

WHAT ARE THESE QUESTIONS

DID YOU SMOKE SOMETHING SHADY

DID YOU DRINK SOMETHING UNUSUAL

ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING

[Duality 10,740]

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Congratulations, you've somehow managed to make this even more terrifying! 

Thank you, I try.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Oompa-loompas, charge! SLAY THE IMPOSTER!

HAH I BRIBED THEM ALL WITH CACOA BEANS

BCOZ I IZ TEH WONKA

I DO WHUD I WAN'

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I HAVE 20 DOLLARS MAN

Congratulations, you are now the proud owner of just enough depleted uranium to give you radiation poisoning if you swallow it.

14 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

sigh

Very well. I shall try and squeeze some decency out of that horrid thing, just for your sake. However, do know that it could take some time.

THE OVERALL DESIGN IS PERFECT AS IT IS

DON'T EDIT IT AS SEVERELY AS I KNOW YOU WILL TO TRY AND 'FIX' IT OUT OF SOME MISGUIDED SENSE OF ARTISTICNESS

I ASKED A COUPLE OF PEOPLE - INCLUDING MY BROTHER - WHICH PICTURE THEY PREFERRED BETWEEN THAT UNFINISHED SKETCH AND THE FULL-COLOUR RARITY YOU DID

AND THEY ALL SAID THAT THE UNFINISHED SKETCH WAS THE OBVIOUS  ANSWER

IT IS A REALLY REALLY GOOD SKETCH TUX I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE BASHING IT LIKE THIS

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Oh. Oh. Um...  my bad? 

Sometimes I forget that you're related to literally all water in the universe.

And, apparently, sometimes you forget that I am literally all water in the universe.

Ze vunderz zat iz hivmind.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

IT APPEARS THAT I HAVE MADE A MISTAKE.

yes

yes it does

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

The first time I jokingly suggested flying over to hug you, you said you don't live in Europe, remember?

PLEASE DON'T SAY [CITATION NEEDED]

THIS IS NOT REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY

PLEASE

[citation nee

[citati

[cita

Oh, very well, I'll let you off just this once.

But only if you hurry up and colour that sketch already.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

If I were him I would have gone straight for God Emperor of the World

I offered him that too, actually, but he turned down the chance to succeed me because he 'was not worthy compared to such glorious effulgence' or some such self-deprecating thing.

Such a humble guy.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

That...  would be a little random, dontcha think?

Besides, I have a 'tuff guy' reputation to uphold.

AND HAVE I EVER GIVEN YOU BAD ADVICE BEFORE MAY I ASK

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

First you forget who my favorite superhero is, then you insult me? So mean...  

You do realise it's only truly an insult if you allow yourself to be insulted by it?

You have only yourself to blame.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Truth be told, I haven't got the slightest clue. I'll say 5.

Simply outstanding.

That's almost exactly 1/1000 of the amount of iron normal males have in their body.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I never licked an electric fence, pretty sure I'd be dead/have some serious brain damage.

There are men who've urinated on electric fences and gotten off with only a temporary (albeit remarkably intense) localised stinging sensation, so I doubt licking them would have quite as damaging of a result.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I like to thing I get all the iron I need from food, and not infectious sharp objects 

Naturally, but not all of life is as we like to think it is.

15 hours ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

WHAT ARE THESE QUESTIONS

ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING

MY QUESTIONS ARE ALWAYS WEIRD HOW HAVE YOU NOT NOTICED THIS ALREADY

WAIT

ARE YOU DELIBERATELY AVOIDING THE QUESTION?

WHAT SECRETS DO YOU HOLD O DARK AND EDGY ONE

 

 

 

 

And, now, just because I can't abide wasting such a swagliciously spontaneously-invented word as 'swaglicious':

What's the swagliciousest injury you've ever walked off?

What's the swagliciousest outfit you've ever worn?

What's the swagliciousest comeback/witticism you've ever said?

What's the swagliciousest person you've ever hung out with?

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

Quote

Thank you, I try.

Oh, no doubting that, you do. You really do.

Quote

HAH I BRIBED THEM ALL WITH CACOA BEANS

BCOZ I IZ TEH WONKA

I DO WHUD I WAN'

Wait, this may be just a big misunderstanding. You're saying you're "Teh Wonka"? Willy Wonka's significantly less famous and successful brother, with a very strange first name?

DUALITY'S IDENTITY EXPOSED

Quote

Congratulations, you are now the proud owner of just enough depleted uranium to give you radiation poisoning if you swallow it.

. . .

Works for me.

'xoxo Goodbye Cruel World'

Quote

THE OVERALL DESIGN IS PERFECT AS IT IS

DON'T EDIT IT AS SEVERELY AS I KNOW YOU WILL TO TRY AND 'FIX' IT OUT OF SOME MISGUIDED SENSE OF ARTISTICNESS

HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY ARTISTIC SENSES

I AM THE ARTIST

I DECIDE IF MY WORK IS GARBAGE

Quote

I ASKED A COUPLE OF PEOPLE - INCLUDING MY BROTHER - WHICH PICTURE THEY PREFERRED BETWEEN THAT UNFINISHED SKETCH AND THE FULL-COLOUR RARITY YOU DID

AND THEY ALL SAID THAT THE UNFINISHED SKETCH WAS THE OBVIOUS  ANSWER

IT IS A REALLY REALLY GOOD SKETCH TUX I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE BASHING IT LIKE THIS

I was never all that proud of the rarity sketch I did, that comparison doesn't really mean anything.

Why am I bashing it? Very well, I will give you numerous reasons:

-the eyes look generic and lifeless, like they're made of glass - a mannequin

-the pose and angle are bland and boring, doesn't convey any emotion

-body parts look misplaced and deformed, despite my best efforts

-lacks originality overall

-looks creepy and uncanny, rather than "adorable"

There, now you know. But if you really want this version finished, I'll do it. For the small, small price of you getting to level 25 in the mlp mobile game. 

Quote

And, apparently, sometimes you forget that I am literally all water in the universe.

Ze vunderz zat iz hivmind.

. . .

I sincerely hope you are aware of the dozens of implied innuendos that statement brings up

Quote

yes

yes it does

ARE YOU ENJOYING MY SUFFERING, DUALITY?

Quote

Oh, very well, I'll let you off just this once.

But only if you hurry up and colour that sketch already.

You've heard my demands. You're not getting me to stare at that abomination for hours on end that easily

So anyway...  does this whole dealio mean you do live in Europe? 

Quote

I offered him that too, actually, but he turned down the chance to succeed me because he 'was not worthy compared to such glorious effulgence' or some such self-deprecating thing.

Such a humble guy.

...You do realize that means you're over 70 years old, right?

Quote

AND HAVE I EVER GIVEN YOU BAD ADVICE BEFORE MAY I ASK

...I choose not to answer this question.

Quote

You do realise it's only truly an insult if you allow yourself to be insulted by it?

You have only yourself to blame.

Not really.

It doesn't matter what I perceive it as, if you meant it as an insult, then it is an insult.

So...

IS IT? 

Quote

Simply outstanding.

That's almost exactly 1/1000 of the amount of iron normal males have in their body.

...Does that mean I get an 'A'?

Quote

There are men who've urinated on electric fences and gotten off with only a temporary (albeit remarkably intense) localised stinging sensation, so I doubt licking them would have quite as damaging of a result.

You sure do know an awful lot about men urinating on electric fences, don't you, Duality?

Quote

Naturally, but not all of life is as we like to think it is.

Jeez water puddle, I'm supposed to be the philosopher here

Quote

MY QUESTIONS ARE ALWAYS WEIRD HOW HAVE YOU NOT NOTICED THIS ALREADY

WAIT

ARE YOU DELIBERATELY AVOIDING THE QUESTION?

WHAT SECRETS DO YOU HOLD O DARK AND EDGY ONE

Believe me, you don't want to know.

Quote

And, now, just because I can't abide wasting such a swagliciously spontaneously-invented word as 'swaglicious':

Sorry to crush your dreams, but that 'word' has been a thing for quite some time now

Quote

What's the swagliciousest injury you've ever walked off?

THE SKIN ON MY LEG WAS BURNED OFF BY SCORCHING HOT ASH, REMEMBER?

I LITERALLY 'WALKED IT OFF', MEANING THAT I RAN AROUND FOR MINUTES IN AN ATTEMPT TO DISTRACT MY NERVOUS SYSTEM FROM THE PAIN

Quote

What's the swagliciousest outfit you've ever worn?

My casual outside attire, actually. Some rather dapper bluejeans (as dapper and respectable as bluejeans can be), a shirt, my hard-to-describe not-too-fancy-yet-somewhat-fancy shoes, a shirt, and my trusty lucky flannel. Got this for my birthday waaaay back, still fits me like a glove. It's modern yet classy and super-comfy, I could not love it more.

Quote

What's the swagliciousest comeback/witticism you've ever said?

Feel free to pick and choose from the messages I've sent you 

Quote

What's the swagliciousest person you've ever hung out with?

Danny Devito

jk I have no idea, all of my few friends are nerds

Edited October 19, 2017 by TheOneGuy0000

[Duality 10,740]

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Oh, no doubting that, you do. You really do.

Are you sure I even have to try?

I would think it appears as if it comes naturally to me.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Wait, this may be just a big misunderstanding. You're saying you're "Teh Wonka"? Willy Wonka's significantly less famous and successful brother, with a very strange first name?

DUALITY'S IDENTITY EXPOSED

Nope, I IZ TEH WONKA

I IZ WILLYWONKA ALTER EGO

I IZ WILLYWONKA CRIMEFIGHTING PSEUDONYM

TEHHHHHH WONKAAAAAA

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

Works for me.

'xoxo Goodbye Cruel World'

Not terminal radiation poisoning, you daft tux.

That would be another $50.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY ARTISTIC SENSES

I AM THE ARTIST

I DECIDE IF MY WORK IS GARBAGE

THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT

I OVERRIDE YOUR GARBAGE-WORK DECISION

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I was never all that proud of the rarity sketch I did, that comparison doesn't really mean anything.

BUT IT'S HARDLY LIKE YOU DITCHED THE RARITY SKETCH BECAUSE YOU COULDN'T ABIDE HOW 'DISGUSTING' IT LOOKED

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

-the eyes look generic and lifeless, like they're made of glass - a mannequin

-the pose and angle are bland and boring, doesn't convey any emotion

-body parts look misplaced and deformed, despite my best efforts

-lacks originality overall

-looks creepy and uncanny, rather than "adorable"

- THE EYES ARE LIMPID POOLS OF ADORABLE HOW DARE YOU

- THE POSE AND ANGLE ARE IRRELEVANT IT'S A PORTRAIT IMAGE

- I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT IT'S LITERALLY JUST A HEAD AND FOR THAT MATTER IT'S THE MOST SHOW-ACCURATE ONE I'VE SEEN IN A WHILE

- THE ORIGINALITY IS IRRELEVANT IT'S A PORTRAIT IMAGE

- HERESY

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

But if you really want this version finished, I'll do it. For the small, small price of you getting to level 25 in the mlp mobile game. 

Coolio, I was gonna do that anyway.

Get started.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

. . .

I sincerely hope you are aware of the dozens of implied innuendos that statement brings up

'Innuendos'?

I sincerely hope you mean 'insinuations', otherwise I'll have to wash your brain out with turpentine.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

ARE YOU ENJOYING MY SUFFERING, DUALITY?

yes

yes it does

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

You've heard my demands. You're not getting me to stare at that abomination for hours on end that easily

So anyway...  does this whole dealio mean you do live in Europe? 

You go ahead and believe that. 

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...You do realize that means you're over 70 years old, right?

I am water.

I am eternity.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...I choose not to answer this question.

That's a 'no', methinks.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Not really.

It doesn't matter what I perceive it as, if you meant it as an insult, then it is an insult.

So...

IS IT? 

If an insult only relies on the intent of the utterer, then no-one would be able to say 'I take that as a compliment'.

And my intent is not that my utterance was an insult, neither that it was not, rather that it would conform to your perception of it.

So. . .

IS IT? 

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

...Does that mean I get an 'A'?

No, it means you get a medically intriguing post-mortem.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

You sure do know an awful lot about men urinating on electric fences, don't you, Duality?

My mother finds potty-humour electrocution videos highly amusing.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

I'm supposed to be the philosopher here

One cannot truly comprehend the ramifications of the discoveries made in the field of quantum physics without first gaining a measure of philosophical insight.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Believe me, you don't want to know.

Believe me, I do.

AND YOU'RE STILL AVOIDING THE QUESTION

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Sorry to crush your dreams, but that 'word' has been a thing for quite some time now

I spontaneously, independently, invented it, which means it is my invention regardless of whether another came up with it first.

Bleah.

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

Feel free to pick and choose from the messages I've sent you 

1 hour ago, TheOneGuy0000 said:

jk I have no idea, all of my few friends are nerds

I'M SORRY ONEGUY

I HAVE FAILED YOU

I CANNOT OFFER YOU ANYTHING MORE THAN NERDINESS

FOR it IS ALL I HAVE

 

 

 

 

What is the largest gemstone you've ever seen?

What's the favourite subject that you took in school?

Is Twilight Sparkle actually as adorable as we have been led to believe?

Edited October 19, 2017 by Duality

[TheOneGuy0000 404]

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Are you sure I even have to try?

I would think it appears as if it comes naturally to me.

Well, you said you are trying. Were you lying, Duality?

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Nope, I IZ TEH WONKA

I IZ WILLYWONKA ALTER EGO

I IZ WILLYWONKA CRIMEFIGHTING PSEUDONYM

TEHHHHHH WONKAAAAAA

HEEEREEEETIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIC

*dumps bucket of sizzling hot liquid chocolate on you*

BURN

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Not terminal radiation poisoning, you daft tux.

That would be another $50.

. . .

I can't even afford to die.

22 hours ago, Duality said:

THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT

I OVERRIDE YOUR GARBAGE-WORK DECISION

BUT YOU'RE NOT PAYING ME

I'M JUST REPAYING YOU FOR BEING WITTY/COLLECTING TUXPOINTS

THEREFORE YOU'RE NO CUSTOMER

THEREFORE I'M RIGHT

THEREFORE SKETCH IS GARBAGE

22 hours ago, Duality said:

BUT IT'S HARDLY LIKE YOU DITCHED THE RARITY SKETCH BECAUSE YOU COULDN'T ABIDE HOW 'DISGUSTING' IT LOOKED

Well, at least that one was passable.

22 hours ago, Duality said:

- THE EYES ARE LIMPID POOLS OF ADORABLE HOW DARE YOU

- THE POSE AND ANGLE ARE IRRELEVANT IT'S A PORTRAIT IMAGE

- I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT IT'S LITERALLY JUST A HEAD AND FOR THAT MATTER IT'S THE MOST SHOW-ACCURATE ONE I'VE SEEN IN A WHILE

- THE ORIGINALITY IS IRRELEVANT IT'S A PORTRAIT IMAGE

- HERESY

-THEY STARE TROUGH MY VERY CORE

-WRONG

-THAT MAY BE A GOOD THING TO YOU, BUT TO ME IT JUST MEANS I'M UNORIGINAL

-WRONG x2

-WRONG x3

And here's a few more for the road:

-I can't get her hair right, it looks stiff and unpleasant

-ear looks off, can't fix it no matter what I try

-mouth and snoot seem misplaced

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Coolio, I was gonna do that anyway.

Get started.

Sure thing, right after you get to level 25. 

In the meantime, I'll be working on those blueprints...

22 hours ago, Duality said:

'Innuendos'?

I sincerely hope you mean 'insinuations', otherwise I'll have to wash your brain out with turpentine.

Oh, I know what I said. 

22 hours ago, Duality said:

You go ahead and believe that. 

OH COME ON

THROW ME A BONE

22 hours ago, Duality said:

That's a 'no', methinks.

I SAID, I CHOOSE NOT TO ANSWER THIS QUESTION

THAT IS NEITHER A YES, OR A NO

22 hours ago, Duality said:

If an insult only relies on the intent of the utterer, then no-one would be able to say 'I take that as a compliment'.

And my intent is not that my utterance was an insult, neither that it was not, rather that it would conform to your perception of it.

So. . .

IS IT? 

. . .

Yes. 

22 hours ago, Duality said:

No, it means you get a medically intriguing post-mortem.

. . .

THE DREAM LIVES ON

Who needs radiation poisoning, anyway?

22 hours ago, Duality said:

My mother finds potty-humour electrocution videos highly amusing.

That's...  great. Just great.

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Believe me, I do.

AND YOU'RE STILL AVOIDING THE QUESTION

[̴C̸ĮT̴͘Ą̸̡T̵͢I̛͟O҉N̶̢ ̴̡NE̵̶҉E̶D̡͘E̸D̷]҉̸͠

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Bleah.

YOU CAN'T

NO TONGUE

22 hours ago, Duality said:

I'M SORRY ONEGUY

I HAVE FAILED YOU

I CANNOT OFFER YOU ANYTHING MORE THAN NERDINESS

FOR it IS ALL I HAVE

WHO SAID I WAS NOT SATISFIED

IT IS MORE THAN I COULD EVER ASK FOR

22 hours ago, Duality said:

What is the largest gemstone you've ever seen?

A grape-sized diamond in the display of a high-security jewel shop inside a mall.

Huge gemstones aren't all that regular around here.

22 hours ago, Duality said:

What's the favourite subject that you took in school?

English, by far. All my teachers were smart, funny, at least relatively young, and had very modern teaching methods, most likely due to often visiting english-speaking countries to learn about their education system.

22 hours ago, Duality said:

Is Twilight Sparkle actually as adorable as we have been led to believe?

No.

She's even more adorable.