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critique wanted Beautiful Land (Orchestral)


Ocean Melody

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It's an ok listen. Your ideas are scattered and don't transition well. You really need to work on keeping one idea and transitioning to a variation of that idea or create a new idea. Really, you should have a max of up to 3 ideas in ABACADA form, which is ideal for orchestral music outside of the traditional forms (sonata, rondo, symphony, concerto etc.) 

Your instruments need more humanization, as they cut off in between notes, which makes them sound too digital. 

All in all, this piece could use quite a bit of work, especially, when it comes to melodic organization and humanization. 

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I think the ending at 3:49 could stand to be lengthened by 5 or so measures. It sounds a bit rushed to me. At 0:51 you might want to try messing around with the clarinet part by making the notes longer to match the other parts. From 1:08 to about 1:30 I think it sounds a bit cluttered. You could probably fix that just by messing around with the dynamics of the different voices. And the transition from 1:56 to 1:58 sounds a little off, but I can't quite put my finger on why. It might just be me.

I'm not a music major (though I probably could have been one), just someone who's been in band for a long time. Take my criticism with a grain of salt.

Other than all that, I thought it was good. I'm a sucker for the melody swapping instruments partway through, so I liked that. It's a nice, relatively calm piece.

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