writing Beyond the Fantasy (Complete)

[Dr_Waveband 745]

[Continuing from the thread "I've Had This Idea For a While"]

 

 

I finally got around to finishing this sombre short story I had worked on for a while. It's the first one I'm more or less satisfied with.

 

 

http://dr-waveband.deviantart.com/art/Beyond-the-Fantasy-325545727

 

 

All critique and thoughts are welcome!

[Lost 1,410]

Just finished reading it, rather good and interesting short story you have there. At first i thought they were living in the middle of nowhere, then space then the ocean. My brain aint so good right now, bloodloss n stuff >.>

[FizzyImp 1,838]

I really loved this. I think it's quite interesting how the lack of dialogue between characters made it seem like the main character was talking directly to the reader.

Like Lost, I also thought it was set in space near the start, probably because my mind associated the 'black sea' part with space.

I especially liked that despite the part about the mother's death being very brief, you really captured pretty much exactly what I was like when I lost my dad.

 

10/10 :3