My First OC - Umbra

[Jalaton 155]

So I decided to make an OC. His name is Umbra, he's a thief and he's able to use magic to stretch his body in a way that makes him look like a shadow. Honestly, he seems kinda OP to me so I don't plan on using him in any RPs. He's supposed to be the antagonist in a story I'm writing.

 

Not sure what to make his cutie mark yet. I was gonna make it a bag of money jumping out of a chest, but can there be a cutie mark for theft? Is that allowed?

 

Hopefully he's not too similar to anyone else's OC.

[Fourze Stallion 95]

Nice simple design, and really works. If you're interested in a cutie mark, since you're going with a shadowy thief... Hmm... Well, perhaps you could look up symbols that other thieves use. Like say the Yatagarasu or Mask☆DeMasque. Then again, I'm just going with AA references since I got that on the brain at the moment.

[SoarinBlue 202]

Just my opinion, but your OC seems to be trying really hard to be edgy.  Personally, I would dial it back a couple notches.  Black is also very, very overused when it comes to OCs, and pairing it with a dark blue is not a good combination.  Assuming he's an antagonist, I guess I can forgive the use of black or another dark color, but two dark colors that are so similar to each other strains the eyes.  If you look at some of the dark colored villains from the show, they mix darker colors with lighter, Nightmare Moon is black mixed with a lighter blue and purple, and Chrysalis is black with green and teal

 

For a cutie mark, assuming he's a thief, perhaps one of those old timey looking robbers masks?  Something like this: http://i.imgur.com/e0UIDBU.jpg

[Jalaton 155]

Nice simple design, and really works. If you're interested in a cutie mark, since you're going with a shadowy thief... Hmm... Well, perhaps you could look up symbols that other thieves use. Like say the Yatagarasu or Mask☆DeMasque. Then again, I'm just going with AA references since I got that on the brain at the moment.

Thanks! Oh I never thought of that! I think I'll check out symbols like that.

 

Just my opinion, but your OC seems to be trying really hard to be edgy.  Personally, I would dial it back a couple notches.  Black is also very, very overused when it comes to OCs, and pairing it with a dark blue is not a good combination.  Assuming he's an antagonist, I guess I can forgive the use of black or another dark color, but two dark colors that are so similar to each other strains the eyes.  If you look at some of the dark colored villains from the show, they mix darker colors with lighter, Nightmare Moon is black mixed with a lighter blue and purple, and Chrysalis is black with green and teal

 

For a cutie mark, assuming he's a thief, perhaps one of those old timey looking robbers masks?  Something like this: http://i.imgur.com/e0UIDBU.jpg

I think I see what you mean about the edginess. I'll try and tone it down, maybe get rid of the spider webbing and change his eyes. I think I'll try and make him a light blue colour and see how that looks as well.

 

Thank you!

[Silverwisp the Bard 2,354]

Hmm, he's not all that edgy. If you're worried about him being OP, just make his powers fail, when under direct illumination.

Colourscheme needs to change though: the blue is too intense and blue and brown don't go well together at the best of times. A Sombra-ish scheme (grey coat, black mane) could work really well with blue eyes.

As for the mark maybe just make t the first object he wanted to steal?A gem perhaps?

[Ruddboy Olaf 10,628]

WOW! I like him! Good job!

 

I especially like the shadow thief part of him!

 

He sounds really interesting!

 

 

I think he definitely would be a cool character for MLP!

 

Keep up the good work!

[Zygen 6,066]

I think he looks good, I was actually expecting him to be totally black, but this is a nice change to that. I think it looks pretty good personally.

 

And as for a cutie mark, I don't see why you can't have a thief cutie mark or anything. its up to you afterall, I'd just look up whatever has to do with thief's and stuff. But just try and find one that isn't to cluttered with things.

[Princess Periwinkle 3,775]

Woah, he looks pretty rad!

 

I like the style, and I like the character. I don't think he's too OP as long as you give his power a weakness.