(Lyrics help) This is Nightmare Night

[Nit Pick 247]

I wrote an MLP song parody of This is Halloween.  I just need help with lyrics, like what to take out and what to add.  The one part I know I want to keep is Zecora's poem about Nightmare Night in the song.  Other than that I'm open to suggestions and critiques.

This is Nightmare Night.doc

[Night Shadow 54]

Not sure.  It looks like it'd be a rough parody.  Some of the lyrics would throw the song off balance.  Just trying to read and keep up with the tune would be kind of hard.  One part, "Everypony is afright' should be changed to 'Everypony's filled with fright'.  'Afright' isn't exactly a word, so 'filled with fright' would make more sense and it still holds true to the rhythm. 

 

It's a really rough song to parody because of the rhythm and such.  You have to structure your words in such a way as to keep up with the tune.  I'm not very good at making parody lyrics but the part I commented on keeps true to the tune.  It is an interesting parody though ^^

[Nit Pick 247]

 

 

One part, "Everypony is afright' should be changed to 'Everypony's filled with fright'. 'Afright' isn't exactly a word, so 'filled with fright' would make more sense and it still holds true to the rhythm.

  Makes sense.  I wanted to make this song so bad I just had to get everything down in Word.  Plus I want this to be 'the' parody of 'This is Halloween'.  Just wanna say thank you personally for the help.  I'll be sure to change it.

 

Still gonna leave this up here though.