"Mi Lamento", a song about Celestia.

[NyxTheShield 91]

Hello everyone ^^ I wanted to share with you my latest song,called "Mi Lamento" (My Lament in english). It's a song about the sorrow Celestia felt when she vanished her sister. The lyrics are in spanish (my main language) and this time i actually sang along my sister (for the backing vocals) hahaha, i hope you enjoy it ^^

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkjCPxVRFFw

 

 

Lyrics (translated):

 

Over the horizon, i see her silhouette rise

a thousand years awaiting for a sign

Her face, stripped of kindness 

Oh sister what happened? Why it had to end this way?

 

Your hidden pain was your perdition.

The accumulated resentment blackened you heart

You made me stop you and banish you from my side

Oh sister what happened? Why it had to end this way?

 

Oh sister why it had to end this way?

Oh sister why it had to end this way?

 

[Carbon Maestro 1,003]

Nice! I enjoyed the lyrics in Spanish. It's so mystifying.

I'd like the song to have some more reverb for the vocals. But that's just me. Hope you had fun with it!

[NyxTheShield 91]

Nice! I enjoyed the lyrics in Spanish. It's so mystifying.

I'd like the song to have some more reverb for the vocals. But that's just me. Hope you had fun with it!

 

I tried more reverb but it made the middle and high frecuencies too notorious, it was way too saturated :c

[Courageous Thunder Dash 7,809]

Love the effect on the vocals, but as Carbon said, there was a little too much reverb flooding them. Dial in a tiny bit of chorus and lower that reverb. The overall light feel to it gave it that sad vibe I was looking for. Maybe lessen the rhythm just a tiny bit?

 

8/10

[Applejohn 108]

I loved the song XD since i speak spanish it was really nice to listen to

Edited June 4, 2014 by Applejohn

[LIndaVonRee 6]

My first language is spanish but i'm gonna go ahead and write in english so other people can read this as well

I think you need to be careful a little more with how you pronounce the words in spanish, talking is completely different to singing, and when you sing in spanish, you have to be really careful with how you pronounce every word so it can be understood well.

There are certain words that one can't really understand, even as a spanish speaker, so be careful about that.

 

As for the voices, I think the second voice might be too much over the main one. 

Still regarding the second voice, be careful with the timing of it so it doesn't sound like it's falling behind as well.

 

I will go ahead and say that I agree with what the other guys have said, the voice needs some reverb, you don't have to add a lot to it, just a little to give it a really gentle, yet not saturated, echo.
I second Thunder Dash on this as well, if you want the song to have a little more of a "sad" feel to it, it would be nice to slow it down a litte bit more. 

 

Also this is a really small detail but i'm sure the song could sound better if you fixed it. There's this little slide on one of the voices that sounds too deep when you say "Oh" on the "Oh hermana, que ha pasado?" part. it sounds a little weird and that was the first thing I noticed when i heard the song that i thought could've sounded better.

 

Please take no offense of this critique, then again, we're all here just trying to help and promote improvement c:

[NyxTheShield 91]

Ehm, we are native spanish speakers aswell, i really don't see anything wrong with the pronunciation, we consider our spanish to be pretty flawless if you ask me. I always, double, triple and quadra check everything i upload, but in the pronunciation aspect, i really dont see anything wrong, i send the song to a dozen of friends before making it public and nobody said a word about the pronunciation.

For the rest, yeah, it depends on tastes, the sliding part you pointed is a style of singing, you can hear similar sliding in Beyonce or other artists.