Is cursing bad? Are you desensitized to it? Does swearing show maturity?

[ManaMinori 4,145]

Do you view cursing as a serious matter? ‘Not really,’ you might say. ‘After all, there are bigger problems in the world to worry about. Besides, everybody curses!’ Is that really true?

Believe it or not, there are many people who refrain from using bad language. And they know a few things that others don’t know. For example:

• Cursing isn’t just about words. Your speech reveals what is going on inside you. Using foul language, then, could indicate that you are insensitive to the feelings of others. Is that the kind of person you really are?

Cursing can cause others to think negatively of you. The book Cuss Control says: “The way we speak can determine who our friends will be, the amount of respect we will get from our families and coworkers, the quality of our relationships, how influential we will be, whether we get the job or the promotion, and how strangers respond to us.” It also says: “Ask yourself if your relationships could, perchance, be even better if you didn’t swear.”

 

Swearing doesn’t make you sound as cool as you might think. In his book How Rude! Dr. Alex Packer states: “People who swear all the time are tiresome to listen to.” He adds that a profanity-filled vocabulary “doesn’t allow for the expression of much insight, wit, intelligence, or empathy. If your speech is lazy, vague, and unimaginative, your mind is sure to follow.”

 

Do you think there's any thing you, personally can do, to prevent yourself from cursing?

 

Why not try to eliminate bad language in one month or less? You could track your progress on a chart or a calendar. To stick to your resolve, however, you may need to take further steps. For example:

• Avoid entertainment that floods your brain with bad language.

“Bad associations corrupt good morals.” “Associations” include not only people but entertainment—the movies you watch, the video games you play, and the music you listen to.

 

Show yourself to be mature. Some people use profanity because they think it makes them sound like an adult. Really, the opposite is true. Mature people “have their powers of discernment trained to distinguish both right and wrong,” They don’t lower their standards just to “impress” others.

 

Really, bad language only pollutes the mind (and the air) with indecent thoughts. There are too many of those in the world already! “Don’t add to the slop,” recommends Cuss Control. “Do your part to clean up the verbal environment. You will feel better about yourself, and other people will feel better about you, too.”

 

Questions for discussion:

Does swearing some something about you? Positive or negative?

Is cussing a serious matter?

Do you take steps to avoid cussing, or do you actively (or occasionally) swear, yourself?

Do you notice when someone cusses around you? Does it bother you, or are you desensitized?

Do you think the bible says anything about cussing?

Edited May 9, 2015 by Nightmare Muffin

[Commissar Alexer 763]

Why the fuck should cursing be bad?

[Frostgage 7,975]

I think it depends on where you are and/or who you're talking to. In certain situations, I really don't think cursing hurts anyone, and can be overblown at times. But there are other times when you should watch what you say, if only out of respect for those around you.

[ManaMinori 4,145]

Why the fuck should cursing be bad?

if you're trying to be funny or cute, it's not working.

 

Would you cuss in a job interview, in front of your potential employer, and get the job, if you did?

[LittleMac 3,085]

I personally try not to curse. But I'm not offended when other people do it around me. Just because I don't curse myself (or at leat I try not to) doesn't mean that I'm turned off by the fact others do

[Commissar Alexer 763]

 

 

if you're trying to be funny or cute, it's not working.

 

Shit.

 

Well, maybe next time.

[Mesme Rize 15,683]

I curse most of the time, but only if the place is the right one. I can't curse here, since this board has PG rules, so i don't do it.

 

I also don't see anything wrong with it. You shouldn't judge someone, just because he likes to curse.

[Starlighty 799]

I think it depends on the situation at hand I guess.. I mean I hate when people cuss just to cuss you know?

[Shanks 10,816]

I think a lot of it is time and place and part of it is also somewhat relative if you ask me. The words have meaning because we have them meaning but then again the same can be said of language in general. I am actually reading a book right now on the history of swearing called Holy Shit which is where the author argues that there are two main categories of swearing one being the holy (swears dealing with "blasphemy") and the shit which are words dealing with body parts and bodily functions with a more recent third category revolving around slurs such as the "N word" or "retard".

 

The blasphemous swears today don't seem like a big deal at least not to people who aren't religious but as it points out in the boom the word "cursing" which is a synonym does come from the fact that many ancient cultures including the ancient Israelites did in fact believe in actual curses. So the old testament verse saying that children are to be put to death for "cursing their parents" dosen't mean that Jr should be put to death for saying "fuck you mom and dad" it means that Jr should be put to death if he tries to put a curse on his parents as in an actual curse.

 

The commandment "thou shalt not take the lords name in vain" was important because as most people couldn't read or write oaths held an even greater importance than they do today and this includes oaths to god as well as promises to oaths to others being sort of a pre cursor to modern contracts. To say things like "god damn it" was to make a mockery of this and to curse this process according to the belief of the ancient Israelites and later the beliefs of medieval Christians where such a matter could get someone exiled, imprisoned or even killed. Interestingly enough various phrases we today would consider vulgar like a lot of "4 letter words" of various bodily functions wasn't seen as bit deal in Midevil Europe even though blasphemous profanity was taken quite seriously. As a result of this many translations of the bible dating from ancient times to the middle ages contained multiple words that today would be considered obscene.

 

The shit or words that revolved around bodily parts and functions being considered obscene interestingly enough came back with a vengeance around the time of the Renaissance due in large part to the resurection of Greco-Roman ideas that came with it and Greco-Roman culture had a concept of profanity much more like the one we have today. What I find hilarious is the fact that several Latin words that formed the basis for "polite" words for "impolite" subjects such as penis, vulva and clitoris for example were actually considered obscene by the ancient Romans which is rather ironic as the Romans weren't exactly known as a chaste civilization. 

[Venomous 18,857]

I swear like a sailor at home and around family and friends.

[ConcorDisparate 385]

I don't really try not to curse .

Anyway, I'm able to talk a very proper language whenever I need it, so it's not a problem.

Why do I curse then ? Don't know, doesn't really matter; I feel like it's a waste of time to bother about it.

[Celli 4,336]

I think it depends on the situation. I don't think it matters in casual conversation, but I wouldn't curse up a storm if I were talking to my grandmother. There are people who don't know their limits, and curse all the time regardless of the situation, and you shouldn't take them seriously. I'll also curse if I'm angry and venting, or arguing with someone. I also think that if you get offended by swearing in a situation like, say you're talking about, for example, a new movie's coming out, and you say "That movie looks fucking awesome!" and the person you're talking to gets offended, then maybe they're the one with a problem.

That's my two cents. Feel free to respond, or something.

[Untitled Goose Q 5,137]

It's a cultural thing, really. On the whole, it has become more socially acceptable, though there are still many occasions where it is unacceptable.

[Celtore 2,770]

I think the way you use cursing and the words you use that makes a difference. I'm desensitized to it and I do my best not to curse unless under a lot of pain, but one word breached the mold. "Shit" has entered my regular vocabulary because it's such a fantastic word and one of the best words we have in the entire English language. I could go off on a huge rave about how fantastic it is as a noun, verb, adjective and adverb, but that's not the point of this topic.

 

I don't care if you swear like a sailor. An old colleague of mine from Newfoundland swears very often; it's very fitting for his extreme personality and it's his way of being friendly or harshly critical. I think people should get off their high horse about cursing. Everyone knows the words, pretty much everyone does it (if not casually, then when in pain or angry), and nothing makes them inherently bad. It's the way you use them that give them power. You can tell someone to piss off in either anger/frustration or in jest and you can use the word bitch when referring to a female dog. It's all about context and any word can be swapped out in place of a curse word and be considered just as filthy.

[Steel Accord 6,659]

 Does swearing some say something about you? Positive or negative?:

 

Negative. Not the worst aspect about a person but it's not something in their favor. 

 

Is cussing a serious matter?:

 

That depends on the context. When speaking in an otherwise civil setting like a formal party or at Church (or an otherwise holy place) it is a serious faux pas that reveals an irreverence to the environment and people you've been welcomed to. In a firefight? Meh, I think it can slide.

 

Do you take steps to avoid cussing, or do you actively (or occasionally) swear, yourself?:

 

I do my best to avoid such language in my personal life. I'm sure if one digs around in my history, they could find many instances of me breaking this personal rule, but it is a personal rule regardless.

 

Do you notice when someone cusses around you? Does it bother you, or are you desensitized?:

 

Notice? Yes. Bother? No. It's my rule to avoid foul language, I don't want to impose that on others.

 

Do you think the bible says anything about cussing?:

 

Well the Second Commandment is "do not take the Lord's name in vein." So that covers curses like "God, damn you." or "Godammit!" Not sure it specifically cites non invoking swears as bad.

[Ziggy + Angel + Rain 11,301]

How many books have you read about cursing?

 

Swearing doesn't necessarily make you seem more or less mature.  Curse words are, well, words.  They're a component of language and can be used to great effect, negative or positive; though it's entirely possible to cause greater emotional upset without any curse words whatsoever.  If someone hones in on my use of a curse word and prejudges me based solely on that one word, that's entirely their problem.  Some will use that as a convenient excuse to ignore what someone else has said altogether.  "You used 'bad' language and are therefore in the wrong."  I look at what the person was saying as a whole rather than whether or not they used the "F-word."

 

Fun examples inspired by an above poster lol:

"F*** your grandma!  She's such a b****!"

VS.

"F***, your grandma sure is a b****in' cook!"

 

I think both might've been applied to my grandmother at some point or another.  One is an attack, one is a perhaps overenthusiastic compliment, but a compliment nonetheless.

 

Another example:

"F*** your grandma!  She's such a b****!"  (A classic.)

VS.

"Your grandma is an incomparably loathsome, ceaselessly nauseating, withered old bag of pale, vein-strangled flesh with bony, claw-like hands she likely utilizes in catching children for her vomit-inducing stews."

 

Which is comparably more hurtful?  I'd much prefer someone just called my grandma a b****.

 

***Disclaimer: No one's grandmother was earnestly attacked during the writing of this post.***

Edited May 9, 2015 by Ziggy and Angelbaby

[KraznorG 28]

I have grown a bit self-conscious about my cursing habits as it is something I judge other's intelligence by and I feel like I should hold myself up to the same standard and expectation. The media issue OP mentions is a definite factor I've grown aware of. I feel a steady diet of aggressive video-games and movies has made cursing a habit for me, I'll often blurt something out and then feel immediately stupid, especially at work. In the context of talking to a parent or when talking to strangers I will refrain from using that language almost automatically, but when I'm in comfortable company my worst habits surface.

[colt_following 169]

I barely ever do. I don't like cursing much, makes me feel dirty having grown up in a pretty sterile home with non-swearing family. I just don't find it necessary in most cases... I mean, there are SO many other words that can be used.

[Cleverclover 1,526]

Apart from when I'm angry and/or venting, I really don't curse very often at all. Personally, I really don't care for people who feel the need to drop an F-bomb in nearly every sentence they speak. 

 

That being said, I don't particularly feel that cursing should be censored. If kids aren't already hearing it at home, they're definitely hearing it at school. 

[Steel Accord 6,659]

How many books have you read about cursing?

 

Swearing doesn't necessarily make you seem more or less mature.  Curse words are, well, words.  They're a component of language and can be used to great effect, negative or positive; though it's entirely possible to cause greater emotional upset without any curse words whatsoever.  If someone hones in on my use of a curse word and prejudges me based solely on that one word, that's entirely their problem.  Some will use that as a convenient excuse to ignore what someone else has said altogether.  "You used 'bad' language and are therefore in the wrong."  I look at what the person was saying as a whole rather than whether or not they used the "F-word."

 

Fun examples inspired by an above poster lol:

"F*** your grandma!  She's such a b****!"

VS.

"F***, your grandma sure is a b****in' cook!"

 

I think both might've been applied to my grandmother at some point or another.  One is an attack, one is a perhaps overenthusiastic compliment, but a compliment nonetheless.

 

Another example:

"F*** your grandma!  She's such a b****!"  (A classic.)

VS.

"Your grandma is an incomparably loathsome, ceaselessly nauseating, withered old bag of pale, vein-strangled flesh with bony, claw-like hands she likely utilizes in catching children for her vomit-inducing stews."

 

Which is comparably more hurtful?  I'd much prefer someone just called my grandma a b****.

 

***Disclaimer: No one's grandmother was earnestly attacked during the writing of this post.***

 

That's all very true, context is everything. A curse though, is still a curse. It's akin to a white lie. It's not the worst thing in the world but it is something that a speaker can do without since the advent of the Thesaurus.

[Probably Lee 197]

I think cursing is only as bad as you make it. And i do not make it bad at all. If you do not overuse curses they are a great way to get your point across. For example, "Fuck you", gets the point across much easier then "I don't like you."

[Ziggy + Angel + Rain 11,301]

That's all very true, context is everything. A curse though, is still a curse. It's akin to a white lie. It's not the worst thing in the world but it is something that a speaker can do without since the advent of the Thesaurus.

I think there's a place for profanity.  If I stub my toe really bad, I'm not saying, "Oh, gosh darnit!  That sure does smart!"  Plus, Louis C.K. wouldn't be near as funny without curse words.  He does fine on talk shows, but it's just not the same. :/

[Discordian 6,015]

Cursing is an expression of thought and emotion that's difficult to put into words. What word you use is irrelevant in spite of there being common words everyone can use. Saying "dang" is the same as "damn". "Fudge" and "fuck" are the same.

 

There is a time and place for it, of course. If only because other people will take your expression the wrong way or misconstrue it to represent more hostile feelings towards a conversation or situation than you're actually placing on it.

 

The only reason people treat it like it's something bad is because people have been taught they were and it sticks with them their entire lives. I imagine it was originally a way to teach children not to be aggressive when they can speak just as well, usually without antagonizing others.

 

And of course maturity comes in how you act, not what you say.

 

Rule of thumb: If you can express it without cursing you should try to but it's not a big deal if you don't. Your point gets across either way.

Do you think the bible says anything about cussing?:

 

Well the Second Commandment is "do not take the Lord's name in vein." So that covers curses like "God, damn you." or "Godammit!" Not sure it specifically cites non invoking swears as bad.

Something to be said about the god cursing: Most people who do it aren't actually cursing God. God has literally no meaning in the sentence. It's usually little more than accentuating the simple statement of "damn it". I imagine most of it is learned behavior.

 

That's why I don't get when people try to correct those who use god curses. It's not like they're actually trying to be blasphemous.

if you're trying to be funny or cute, it's not working.

 

Would you cuss in a job interview, in front of your potential employer, and get the job, if you did?

I dunno, I thought it was pretty funny.

 

Don't see how cussing on the job has anything to do with the joke either.

[ThatOneComrade 1,091]

I couldn't give less of a fuck about cursing being bad. If I wanna fuckin' curse, I'm gonna fuckin' curse, and nobody but the Mods can do shit about it! (Mods, please don't kill me)

 

All that swearing says about me is that I'm fine with using it. Does it give people a negative view on me? Of course, but that's only because of the loose stigma surrounding it. Cursing is far from a serious matter. In fact, I'd say it's one of the most widely-known mundane ones. Little kids curse because it's something they're constantly told not to do, thus they do it out of some silly rebellious attitude. Older kids curse constantly, and "fuck," or any other curse word, is a standard part of the average US adult's daily vocabulary.

 

Despite that, we still demonize cursing, and I believe it's because demonizing said words have been ingrained in our brains since childhood. When I meet someone that freely curses, my respect for them drops slightly. This makes me a huge hypocrite, since I curse like a sailor, but the difference between me and them is that I do it in private, or in situations where cursing could be considered appropriate (ie getting in a car crash with my new car).

 

From what I've read, the only cursing-related thing the Bible talks about is using the Lord's name in vain. There's nothing about "shitheads" and "assholes," so that doesn't explain why we stigmatize cursing like we do. I don't know, man. History's weird.

[Steel Accord 6,659]

 

 

Something to be said about the god cursing: Most people who do it aren't actually cursing God. God has literally no meaning in the sentence.

 

You'll have to forgive me. To me that makes the curse worse not better.

 

 

 

It's usually little more than accentuating the simple statement of "damn it". I imagine most of it is learned behavior.

 

Bad habits should be broken.

 

 

 

That's why I don't get when people try to correct those who use god curses. It's not like they're actually trying to be blasphemous.

 

Intent and effect are two different things. 

 

The blind man may not intend to step on a dog's tail, but he still should say sorry if he does.