critique wanted Agent Sweety Drops Song

[icyfire 433]

I would love some feedback on a song i wrote right after the release of the 100th episode. I was a bit scared to show it to anyone so I never released it. I would love some Critique on basically any part of it. Please excuse my shaky/off key ness I was super nervous! Eep! Thanks!! Please do not use this song or cover it with out my permission. Please do not take credit for it! (if there is even anything you would want to steal lol. I doubt it.) This is a work in progress

 

https://youtu.be/OQLrVqwmHdU

Edited September 24, 2015 by icyfire888

[Espada12 17]

That song was amazing life changing I liked the part past the second half when I thought it wouldnt close up

[icyfire 433]

That song was amazing life changing I liked the part past the second half when I thought it wouldnt close up

Thank you! That means a lot! Any advice?

Edited September 24, 2015 by icyfire888

[Electron 39]

Has the voice been made hoarse by purpose?

[icyfire 433]

Has the voice been made hoarse by purpose?

Haha. No I was getting over a cold. 

[icyfire 433]

You are right though, it does sound prett hoarse