mega thread How are you feeling?

[Yakamaru 3,122]

Annoyed. My car is at the mechanic but apparently I haveto wait 2 weeks? What? 

Called them earlier and asked of they could at least do diagnostics on her to see what's wrong, and they agreed but didn't give any specific ETA. Hopefully it will be done soon.

[Ice Princess Silky 12,533]

21 hours ago, Pandora said:

A little lighter at heart.. finally king was there; I did shed tears but it’s okay that’s been a main pain too; 

I’m focused on getting artworks done at last.. that causes some relief; my main thing to also tackle is work but I have a 1 to 1 with my boss the 26th

I'm so glad, lovely. I love that you use art work to soothe yourself. That makes me feel better about the situation as it resolves <3

[Tao 7,283]

Feeling a little worn out and kinda drained today 

[Sparklefan1234 167,837]

I feel bored around the forum today. Conversation is moving slowly. 

[ZiggWheelsManning 9,064]

Thirsty, need an energy drink  

[They call me Loyalty 1,948]

Centered. I had some time to introspect about the past, and put things in order. Since it is very difficult to talk with my mother or her brother. Because they seem so lost. And I don't understand how they were so blind to all these bs. Since it was so evident. So, I still feel some kind of moral duty to keep them in that path that was taken from us, because it hurts me to see them walking around blind and being influenced on the basis of this ignorance that other people instilled in them, under the false pretext of ideolgies and what not.

That is the actual reason I did what I did. And my mother was also clever enough to retaliate against the rest of the family, on instinct alone. But she does not understand it rationally. Because realizing your entire life was a lie, may be too much. But at least, I did my best to protect their true nature from being further undermined and distorted by other people.

And I have much to thank my own mother for that. Because she did the same with me, originally. She instinctively protected me from the rest of the family. From my great aunt and her mother. Who would have died alone, if it wasn't because they had money.

But nobody liked these people. So, it was destined to happened. And thus we lost most of the inheritance. Which would have sat there rotting. Because I was never materialistic. I am more wild or simplistic, if you will. And my mother is no different. She only acts on this materialism to numb that pain that she is unable to understand within her, that sources from that deeper truth that I previously mentioned.

I wanted to express myself with clarity. Since much of the mental problems I have come from that shared pain we both have. It is sexual, emotional and mental pain over the separation caused between us. It is a broken bond between mother and son. And that distorted bond is what wiped out the entire family. Because they thought they knew "better". Still, the damage is already done. And I am still in pain. So, there will be times when I go insane, or become numb, or talk things that make no sense. I just wanted to explain the actual reason this is happening. It is not exploit others, or to lie.

Though, I do enjoy trolling a lot. So, if anything. Please, just ignore me. But yeah. I am still myself. And I will die on this hill which is called after me. Because to this truth, that is my real nature. Are also tied the lives of the family that I never got to have because of all this. And I cannot insult them like that.

I hope you are doing what you have to do. That is about it.

Edited June 19, 2023 by They call me Loyalty

[Cash In 22,051]

Feeling pretty good right now. After weeks of my sleep schedule being completely out of whack, I'm finally starting to fix it up.

[Verdant Shy 949]

On 2023-06-19 at 6:08 AM, Tao said:

Questioning why ppl cant be happy with what they have 

Cause we are never satisfied and always see problems.

[Gone Airbourne 21,977]

Spoiler

Reliving memories that I just want to forget. Seeing others with companionship... envy, bitterness and jealousy. Not the most pleasant qualities at all.

[QTUnicorn 10]

Feeling frustrated. At the same time, sorrow. I believe that an important factor is being taken for granted when it comes to people being considerate to one another.

[Longhaul 6,788]

Sore and tired.  One of the drawbacks to my job.

[ZiggWheelsManning 9,064]

Relaxed after shaving and a shower.  

[Jackleberry 1,921]

I've been on a heck of a nostalgia trip over the past month, so, kinda bouncing back and forth between joy and sadness depending on what memories I'm reliving.

[Sparklefan1234 167,837]

I feel like I need to tell @Adariousmist how AWESOME I think their Twilight Sparkle profile banner is! 

[Adariousmist 124]

34 minutes ago, Sparklefan1234 said:

I feel like I need to tell @Adariousmist how AWESOME I think their Twilight Sparkle profile banner is! 

Thanx.  There is no world in which I could ever get enough Twili.  I mean, were it not for her, I wouldn't have made it more than 4 episodes in to the series, so there's that too.

[Yakamaru 3,122]

Good.

Called the mechanic earlier and apparently there isn't anything wrong with my car, and some sensor have most likely given a false reading. 

Will be picking up my girl tomorrow most likely.

[nepeta 125]

I'm alright. I have to go to the dentist tomorrow (today? its 2 am) because one of my fillings fell out :| 

[Tao 7,283]

4 hours ago, Yakamaru said:

Good.

Called the mechanic earlier and apparently there isn't anything wrong with my car, and some sensor have most likely given a false reading. 

Will be picking up my girl tomorrow most likely.

I'm getting my car in to make sure its ok for a long trip  given I don't deal with car probs too good at all.....

[Longhaul 6,788]

Not doing well.  Feeling like a failure and a fraud, and that I should just fade away.

[Sparklefan1234 167,837]

I HATE this feeling of dread I have every time I log on to MLPF because I'm worried about bothering my friends while they're doing something

important.

Edited June 21, 2023 by Sparklefan1234

[Auroraderp 612]

5 minutes ago, Sparklefan1234 said:

I HATE this feeling of dread I have every time I log on to MLPF because I'm worried about bothering my friends while they're doing something important.

Literally exact same man.

 

You can always, ALWAYS skip on over and talk to me whenever you feel this way, and hopefully vice-versa too. 

Here for you bestie 

 

[They call me Loyalty 1,948]

Same. She rejected the truth once again under the pretext that she is going to repair our future. And I promised her that she is gonna have no future as long as she continues to reject the truth. So, nothing to say.

My mother says to hate the rest of the family, but she continues to act on their false premises and religious bs. Which is exactly what got us into this limbo, as well as other interferences.

But it doesn't matter. Because she owes herself this dignity. Because she has insulted our blood. And because the truth in that blood is heavier than all the lies the rest of the world told to her. Which are also the source of her misery.

Do you think it is an act of cruelty for animals to sacrifice their offspring? Or love, mercy and wisdom. My mother used to have a heart like that. And I know it is still there, but the rest of the famliy numbed that wisdom. Which then caused harm to us. And that is the reason they ended like that.

So, yeah. Same as always. I am still bound by her rejection of the truth. But I have assumed the role of an anchor. And I will bring her down to reality. Even if I have to destroy all we have. Which is pointless. Because we have nothing in reality.

My regards. I hope you and your families are doing good.

Edited June 22, 2023 by They call me Loyalty

[Verdant Shy 949]

7 hours ago, They call me Loyalty said:

Same. She rejected the truth once again under the pretext that she is going to repair our future. And I promised her that she is gonna have no future as long as she continues to reject the truth. So, nothing to say.

My mother says to hate the rest of the family, but she continues to act on their false premises and religious bs. Which is exactly what got us into this limbo, as well as other interferences.

But it doesn't matter. Because she owes herself this dignity. Because she has insulted our blood. And because the truth in that blood is heavier than all the lies the rest of the world told to her. Which are also the source of her misery.

Do you think it is an act of cruelty for animals to sacrifice their offspring? Or love, mercy and wisdom. My mother used to have a heart like that. And I know it is still there, but the rest of the famliy numbed that wisdom. Which then caused harm to us. And that is the reason they ended like that.

So, yeah. Same as always. I am still bound by her rejection of the truth. But I have assumed the role of an anchor. And I will bring her down to reality. Even if I have to destroy all we have. Which is pointless. Because we have nothing in reality.

My regards. I hope you and your families are doing good.

Please don't cause any harm towards anyone 

[They call me Loyalty 1,948]

42 minutes ago, SunIsLost said:

Please don't cause any harm towards anyone 

The harm to my family is already done. Othewise you wouldn't be here trying to ease your conscience.

But I still love her like the first day. Nothing has changed. If anything, this pain is a proof of that love. Despite how much she was forced to change, to reject herself based on "better looking people". To "fix" her teeth and to hate her own body. When she was always perfect to me. And then she was "taught" to hate her own nature because of doctrine, which caused the separation from her maternal instinct, which then caused damage to her son. But my love has not changed. And I am still trying to protect her, because she is now vulnerable because of what they did. So, even something like death would be a mercy compared to what the world is capable of doing to a person in her state of mind.

Nothing that can be said or done will replace the family we lost. So, a more honest answer would be to pay respectful silence here. Because you can only hurt yourself at this point. Especially with such empty words.

Edited June 22, 2023 by They call me Loyalty

[Verdant Shy 949]

30 minutes ago, They call me Loyalty said:

The harm to my family is already done. Othewise you wouldn't be here trying to ease your conscience.

But I still love her like the first day. Nothing has changed. If anything, this pain is a proof of that love. Despite how much she was forced to change, to reject herself based on "better looking people". To "fix" her teeth and to hate her own body. When she was always perfect to me. And then she was "taught" to hate her own nature because of doctrine, which caused the separation from her maternal instinct, which then caused damage to her son. But my love has not changed. And I am still trying to protect her, because she is now vulnerable because of what they did. So, even something like death would be a mercy compared to what the world is capable of doing to a person in her state of mind.

Nothing that can be said or done will replace the family we lost. So, a more honest answer would be to pay respectful silence here. Because you can only hurt yourself at this point. Especially with such empty words.

I apologize.

I hope the situation will get better, I didn't mean to offend.