writing Heart Of Darkness

[The Stranger 812]

Hello Everyone! Last night I decided to start writing a grimdark poem since I haven't written anything that involved grimdark content for a long time. I made it a mission to start writing a few (about 2 or 3) grimdark poems before I start working on my grimdark fanfictions again.

 

This poem was a bit short but I've always believed good things always come in small packages. Most of my writing is effected by the music I listen to as I work so this poem below was effected by some dark ambient music I had playing in the background. 

 

At the moment I'm working on another grimdark poem that I hope will end up being a little longer. This 2nd poem will be about the decline of Pinkie Pie's sanity. So yes it will be connected to MLP. The poem will probably end up being a bit graphic so I probably won't post it on the MLP Forums. I'm concerned that the mods will view it as NSFW. 

 

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the poem below. Leave your opinions if you can. I know I'm not a pro when it comes to writing poems so I won't be offended if you don't like my work.

 

[side note: When I post grimdark poems on the MLP Forums the text will be in red since it suits grimdark writing better.]

 

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Sheathed in darkness my heart shall be, never again will it be free. 

 

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Hiding away from my own sin, afraid of the light i’ve always been. 

 

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The empty black sky above my head, intrigued I am and filled with dread. 

 

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My tainted heart beats strong and true, inducing fear only for you.

 

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The bleeding moon comes in sight, fueled by darkness it fills me with fright. 

 

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As a grin spreads across its rocky face, disturbed I become and quicken my pace.

 

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As its pearcing glare stares down upon my head, my heart grows weak as I go to bed.

 

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My heart my heart it has grown weak, a new one I need and yours is what I seek.

 

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[Edit: As I was looking over this poem I ended up adding 3 more lines. To make it easier for you readers to pick out which lines I just added I've colored them in green.]

Edited January 5, 2013 by Data Void

[MelancholicMemory 2,025]

I love it! I'm glad you added those three lines. They' 're very good, and they improve the feeling of the poem. I especially like thethe imagery of "the bleeding moon." Great job!

[The Stranger 812]

I love it! I'm glad you added those three lines. They' 're very good, and they improve the feeling of the poem. I especially like thethe imagery of "the bleeding moon." Great job!

 

Thank you Melancholic. I'll probably start posting my content on Deviantart like you. I already have an account but I haven't uploaded anything just yet

[MelancholicMemory 2,025]

Thank you Melancholic. I'll probably start posting my content on Deviantart like you. I already have an account but I haven't uploaded anything just yet

Cool! Can you link your dA page so I can follow you there?Also, if you want to check out my grimdark poem, I just posted it a little while ago. It' s called "The Beast of Krowlihood."

[The Stranger 812]

Sure it's no problem. 

 

Link to my empty (lol) deviant art page ==>> http://twisted-bone.deviantart.com

 

All I have is a favorites list on it. I'm going to start posting my poems and art soon though. 

[truemlp_fan98 20]

Very nice poem, I liked your writing style. I liked the fonts and the colours you used to present it, it is very important to have good presentation.

[Octavia's Cellozoid 1,488]

This is pretty dang good. I like the last line, " My heart my heart it has grown weak, a new one I need and yours is what I seek", it reminds me of something, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

Edited January 6, 2013 by Octavia's Cellozoid

[The Stranger 812]

Very nice poem, I liked your writing style. I liked the fonts and the colours you used to present it, it is very important to have good presentation.

 

I agree with you 100% on that. Thank you for noticing. 

 

 

 

This is pretty dang good. I like the last line, " My heart my heart it has grown weak, a new one I need and yours is what I seek", it reminds me of something, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

 

I'm happy to see that you picked this out of the poem. It shows that you're interested. My thanks.  

 

When I wrote that last line I purposely wrote it in a way that would cause a reader to question what that line means. I'll leave it up to everypony to make up their own theory.  

[Xalder 30]

Something I like about the music I listen to (Streetlight Manifesto) is that it presents a dark and serious topic and presents it in an optimistic and positive light, with upbeat, fast-paced tempos that (for me) signify an end will come to the pain, suffer through it as you must, but focus on the good while you do.

 

With your latest post in this thread you imply that the last line is meant for the readers' interpretation, as such I'll connect my ideas of a forthcoming end to the pain, a discovery of love and a realization that while your heart may be weak, you will always be able to rely on the love of others.