What Would Trixie Do?

[Starswirl the Trixie 975]

MLP Forums has an awful lot of people asking for advice, be it life advice, requests for artwork critiques, requests for story development, etc.  Bronies should be able to get the advice they need, but often they struggle to get enough high-quality advice.

 

Seeing this problem, Trixie has graciously offered to give some of her valuable time to helping people with their problems using her unique, insightful world view.  That's right, folks; it's time for What Would Trixie Do?

 

Trixie can explain the rest.

_____

 

Watch in awe as The Great and Powerful Trixie gives meaningful advice to ponies and humans in need!

 

Under the rule of Celestia, ponies have struggled to find answers to the problems in their lives.  The Equestrian establishment foalishly provides only cupcakes and rainbows.  That is why I have generously offered to give ponies the perspective of greatness and genius; that is, my perspective.  So come, ponies; ask what I, The Great and Helpful Trixie, would do, and watch as your problems simply vanish!

 

 

This is a thread where Trixie will attempt to provide valuable answers to requests asking what I would encourage ponies to do.  If you wish to inquire about my personal life, beg for enlightenment it here.

 

So come, ponies!  Be amazed as your lives are reconstructed to perfection by Equestria's most magical unicorn!

 

Legal disclaimer: Trixie is, in the eyes of the insolent law, considered a professional capable of consulting ponies only in the areas of prestidigitation and illusory magic.  If you need serious help in another area, such as legal advice, medical advice, financial advice, advice on another type of magic, etc, you should seek out an appropriate professional.  Oh, and by posting you accept all liability for the consequences of actions inspired by Trixie's advice and all that jazz.

Edited November 22, 2013 by Starswirl the Trixie

[duidamasterXD 9,626]

The Great and Powerful Trixie wants me to post humbly?

 

If I were interested in pursuing a career in stage magic, what advice would you have for me?

 

Also, how long do you generally stay in each place you visit?

Edited April 4, 2013 by DashForever

[Doctor Shuu 797]

Every time I try to enter Ponyville, some guards stop me and start yelling something about me being a "filthy bug" or a "deceptive beast". What can I do to gain their trust?

[Leafeon 2,702]

Trixie! First of all, it's always an honour to talk to you.

 

Second; I have come into trouble with ponies with the fear of moths. They try to swat at me, and murder me. How do I dispose of them?

 

Thanks!

[Starswirl the Trixie 975]

The Great and Powerful Trixie wants me to post humbly?

 

If I were interested in pursuing a career in stage magic, what advice would you have for me?

 

Stage magic is a glorious profession. However, Equestria is a tough market for a newcomer. But don't worry: You wouldn't be forced into the terrible burden of being my competitor. I'd encourage you to go to the lands of the Griffin, or the Dragons, or even wherever the Changelings come from. I don't know of any magicians there, so anywhere very far away would be a good place to practice.

 

If you survive[\s] When you come back, contact me again and I can advise you on where to go next.

 

Also, how long do you generally stay in each place you visit?

Depends on the insolence and foalishness of those living there. In fact, the amount of time I spend in a town is a good measure of how respectable a town is.

 

Most respectable town: Hoofington

Least respectable town: Ponyville

 

Every time I try to enter Ponyville, some guards stop me and start yelling something about me being a "filthy bug" or a "deceptive beast". What can I do to gain their trust?

As a changeling, I'm sure you have skills for deception and illusion topped only by mine. You could try body-snatching a guard as you enter town, but it may be hard to imitate an Equestrian soldier.

 

Thankfully, I once visited Ponyville and know a much easier way. You should snatch a lavender unicorn mare who occasionally spends time outside town in the apple orchards and the Everfree Forest. She is very easy to imponyate. Just act like an introverted, bookish, OCD elementary school foal who couldn't understand greatness if it hit her in the face.

Edited April 5, 2013 by Starswirl the Trixie

[Starswirl the Trixie 975]

Trixie! First of all, it's always an honour to talk to you.

 

Second; I have come into trouble with ponies with the fear of moths. They try to swat at me, and murder me. How do I dispose of them?

 

Thanks!

 

I delayed in responding because I prefer answering two at a time.  But some frivolous matter has knocked this thread to the depths of the forum.  So...

 

 

First: I have noted your diligent service to the cause, Firebolt.  When I have my own chunk of the world to rule, I assure you that your services will not go unrewarded.

 

Second: It seems you have recovered from your state of moth-ness.  Which is good, as I don't particularly like moths.  Always fluttering around at night annoying me before committing suicide by flying into my lamp.  The cretins once ate part of my cape, too.

Edited April 28, 2013 by Starswirl the Trixie

[Untitled Goose Q 5,137]

What effects do cats have on show business?