Dating Advice From Lovestruck

[Eloquence 2,076]

   

Hi there!

 

My name is Lovestruck, Ponyville's very own matchmaker, love doctor, and overall expert on all things romantic! My hometown may be my top priority, but when I heard I could spread my love expertise here as well I just couldn't say no!

 

So, go on and ask me anything at all. I'll do my best to help in all matters of the heart <3

[Shadow Beam 1,179]

Last resource in a date if everything else went horribly bad.

Just in case...

[Eloquence 2,076]

Last resource in a date if everything else went horribly bad.

Just in case...

 

Well, that depends. Is the date going badly because of some lousy circumstances, or is it because you feel like you've been making mistakes, or do you just not feel compatible with the other person? Hehe, or perhaps it's a mix of things?

 

If you've had a run of bad luck and your date plans turned out badly, the most important thing is to keep an upbeat attitude. Continuing to do your best to make sure you and your date have as nice a time as you can will show this special someone how considerate you are, and no one likes someone who gets grumpy and defeated when things don't work out right.

 

If you feel like your actions haven't been perfect, I would suggest that you just don't worry about it, and keep doing your best to be your sweet self. Ask a question if you feel like you haven't been keeping up the conversation, they're a good way to spark more conversation and they show that you're interested in what your date has to say.

 

If you just feel like there isn't any chemistry between you two, then there really isn't much you can do. If two people don't click, then that's really all there is to it. It's good that you tried, but you might just have to accept that they aren't quite right for you.

[Shadow Beam 1,179]

Thanks for that Doc, gonna keep it in mind

[Eloquence 2,076]

Thanks for that Doc, gonna keep it in mind

 

Don't mention it. I'm glad I could help

[Vivacity 34]

I can't have a relationship for more than a couple months, despite my best efforts. I've decided to not ask anyone out anymore because I'm afraid of messing up again. But now I'm getting jealous of anyone in any sort of relationship.

 

In retrospect, I think I should have put this in life advice, but being a blank flank, I can't at the moment.

Edited January 20, 2015 by BaronVonBubble

[Eloquence 2,076]

I can't have a relationship for more than a couple months, despite my best efforts. I've decided to not ask anyone out anymore because I'm afraid of messing up again. But now I'm getting jealous of anyone in any sort of relationship.

 

In retrospect, I think I should have put this in life advice, but being a blank flank, I can't at the moment.

 

It's quite alright dear! I am happy to help you with this as much as I can, though of course it won't hurt to ask others too.

 

I think you need to ask yourself why these past relationships didn't work out in the long term. I'm guessing that one of two things is going on. Either you are just not finding the right people, or perhaps you are not quite ready for such a long-term relationship. There may be something you need to work out for yourself, take care of yourself for a while before you can bring someone else into your life in that way.

 

What it is that's causing this problem is something that you must answer for yourself, but either way, my advice is to focus on yourself and your own needs for a while. Love is a wonderful thing, but it cannot be rushed, and it will come more easily if you better understand what you want and need in a partner.

 

I wish you luck in love in the future dear <3

[Vivacity 34]

It's quite alright dear! I am happy to help you with this as much as I can, though of course it won't hurt to ask others too.

 

I think you need to ask yourself why these past relationships didn't work out in the long term. I'm guessing that one of two things is going on. Either you are just not finding the right people, or perhaps you are not quite ready for such a long-term relationship. There may be something you need to work out for yourself, take care of yourself for a while before you can bring someone else into your life in that way.

 

What it is that's causing this problem is something that you must answer for yourself, but either way, my advice is to focus on yourself and your own needs for a while. Love is a wonderful thing, but it cannot be rushed, and it will come more easily if you better understand what you want and need in a partner.

 

I wish you luck in love in the future dear <3

Thank you so much for the help, It means a lot.

[EddG 554]

Hey Lovestruck!

I am in a relationship with a wonderful person.

I want to save up to visit her but the plane trip is about £4000!

Can you give me some advice on saving up to meet her?

[Eloquence 2,076]

Hey Lovestruck!

I am in a relationship with a wonderful person.

I want to save up to visit her but the plane trip is about £4000!

Can you give me some advice on saving up to meet her?

 

Goodness! I'm not sure how much that would be in bits, but it sounds like an awful lot of money!

 

First of all, I think it is very sweet that you are willing to work so hard to meet this person. That is very generous of you. However, I must admit that your question is more about finance than love, and I don't have a finance cutie mark

 

I'll still try to give you the best advice I can though. If you are able to, you might want to think about making a special savings account just for this trip. You can put aside a little at a time, and spending that money will be less tempting if you know it will help you meet your special someone.

[Sigma 768]

How do I tell if a guy is gay or bi? My gaydar is as technologically advanced as a potato.

 

How do I become better at small talk? I've never been interested in the latest gossip, and the subjects I like to talk about bore most people.

 

Is online dating a bad idea?

[Eloquence 2,076]

How do I tell if a guy is gay or bi? My gaydar is as technologically advanced as a potato.

 

How do I become better at small talk? I've never been interested in the latest gossip, and the subjects I like to talk about bore most people.

 

Is online dating a bad idea?

 

Ooooh, lots of questions! I'll do my best to answer all of them well

 

Well, unfortunately there is no perfect answer to your first question. The only way to know someone's sexuality for sure is to ask them. If there's a guy you like though, and you can't find a good, polite way to outright ask them, then you might want to try making your own sexuality a bit more apparent. Add a little rainbow to your wardrobe, work little hints at your sexuality into the conversation, and see if you're met with excitement. Queer people are usually excited to meet people like them, it's nice to find people who have similarities like that.

 

Small talk is tough to figure out if you aren't a natural at it, but the best thing to do is to practice practice practice! It can be tough, but the more you talk to other people, the more you learn about how to do it well. It also helps to be observant, maybe notice something about the other person that you can compliment or ask about. People like to feel like they're being paid attention to.

 

Online dating can work really well, and make people really happy, but it works differently for different people. Only you can decide how well it will work for you, and it depends a lot on how much you want physical closeness with your partner. Some people need to be with the one they love, others are happy to just talk to them. Of course, online dating can lead to real-life dating, and there are benefits to that too. It can be easier to meet people online, when you can know ahead of time what you have in common with someone

 

I hope all of this helps you make new friends, and maybe find someone special too

[FancyHorse 1,209]

Hello there,

 

Have you always did "love advice" as a career? Or are you recently getting into it?

 

When did you discover your interest and talent to giving Love Advice?

[Eloquence 2,076]

Hello there,

 

Have you always did "love advice" as a career? Or are you recently getting into it?

 

When did you discover your interest and talent to giving Love Advice?

 

I've been helping people with their love lives ever since I discovered it was my special talent!

 

Well, actually I guess it was before that. I discovered my talent by helping my friend get to know somepony she liked back when I was just a schoolfilly. I made plans for them to spend time together and become closer, and they worked like a charm! When I went home that day my dad pointed out to me that I had gotten my cutie mark while I was out, and after that I knew for sure that helping ponies (and now people) find love was my special talent!

 

((As for Lovestruck's RPer, this is the first place where I've given out love advice like this. I have a lot of experience with the subject and its many facets, so I figured I would use that experience to help others))

[Untitled Goose Q 5,137]

What advice would you give to someone whos date has been ruined by an omnipotent being from another universe?

[Eloquence 2,076]

What advice would you give to someone whos date has been ruined by an omnipotent being from another universe?

 

I would advise them to stop reading so many fantasy books for a little while

[FancyHorse 1,209]

What would you say would've been the most awkward love advice you've been asked about?

[Eloquence 2,076]

What would you say would've been the most awkward love advice you've been asked about?

 

I don't see most questions as being awkward really. When you study the magic of love, things that seem awkward to most ponies become more commonplace, and you start to realize that we're all at least a little awkward in love. Of course, there is still the occasional question that makes me blush, but I don't think I could tell you about those on a family-friendly forum, heh...  

 

I do get one question a lot that's awkward to answer though. Ponies ask me all the time how to get a marefriend or coltfriend, and they expect an answer like the kind somepony would give on how to build a birdhouse. Those are pretty awkward, because I can never give them the answer that they want. There's no formula or secret trick to get a special somepony just like that, you have to find somepony that you have a special connection with. 

[Rene 41]

What's your advice on what to do when someone you love dearly betrays you but makes a big show of doing it unwillingly and claims they still love you too?

[Wolfeus Silverpaw 301]

I've never been on a date before. What would qualify as a suitable date, and how should I ask the other person out?

[Valynne 2,685]

okay ill talk as Balareth and not as any of my OC and this is really serious, am alone and i would like a girlfriend, a online relationship and not be alone, my problem is that am very passionate even when i gvie space to girls, looks like i dunno what i can do to make them like me, am just tired to be alone, and i even said that the day i found my special somepony im gonna give her thousands of gifts poems, video animations, and dedicate only to her and bring her the moon and the stars, make her happy all seconds and never be bored or depressed for her since she is gonna be the source of my happiness, i would like to hear something that is not "you are gonna found her one day" "dont give up!" am tired of that, i need a queen, i have so big proyects but am not gonna renounce to her, my proyects are towards the girl is gonna be my girlfriend, so you understand that i feel frustrated, i have a loving mind but theres nopony to express it, thing is that i want some that understand me and share all her likings with me,
i want somepony to worship and make it happy but you know i feel like i need some time because i need to show what am able to do, i was in a depression until i swallow it to not be like the resot of the person who always depressed, i wanna smile and wanna make smile to all persons but specially my love one, i need desperately love, a date or something, i believe in online relationships and is my proyect to be with that girl, i just want somepony to say "i love you" to give her thousands of poems, gifts, animations, draws, dedicate all my life only to her caprices and orders, to be treated how she wants and surrender to her charming, am a person that feel alone and i dont want to be, i just want to love no less. i want somepony who wants to release herself and release me, to be with me and me with her and be twin soul. if you know a girl who wants a special somepony am here always... i just cant continue being alone.
ill love anything that the girl loves and change everything to make that girl happy, am 100% loyal, respectful, honest, kind and i never tell lies, i also am EXTREMLY generous, and ill do whatever it takes to have the heart of any girl, and i dunno what to do man, maybe you read this entirely maybe you dont but i just wanna know what can i do, the "dont give up" "girls is gonna appear one day" are useless words to me cuz i heard it all my life so i would like to hear what you can say to me, i dunno what to do am desperate andd scared to be alone, and just saying this i look like a creep to girls only cuz i wanna love and they ALL see me as garbage and i've spend all my life to develope my skills to show them am not garbage, that am a person that can give you all they want if i only get a chance, sometimes i cry at night for not being as popular as the rest of bronies, i dunno if is cuz am mexican or my bad english but am tired to be seen as something less than human, and to avoid sound like the rest i have to fight, i wont lie am sad but i wont lie either if i say that i fight constantly daily to not give up and smile and all time to prove all ponies here that am one of them and i can make a lot of things like them, that am an artist, i been through a lot and i fee like i deserve at least a place in the fandom despite my nationality and my english level. You know, girls wouldnt like to be with me cuz am creepy, my appereance, my love, my feelings, the sweet words.. i feel like a monster when i talk to them cuz i can imagine their reactions when i talk to them and due the girls answers i only imagine disgust, laugh, and rejection, my self steem is low but am trying to not beat myself to see, if a girl found that attractive, so my art and my self learned flash is not only to be artistic, is to prove that i can fit at least on this fandom, but honestly i dunno what to do, i feel like i go down and be a Forever Alone with just workds.
Let me tell you something when i was on kindergarder until university i always been see as a freak because i didnt think like the rest, not even in what people call special or stranger, i was a strager between strangers, and i think that phase is over, time to find a girl that wants to be with me, i just fear to be buried and nopony cries on my coffin, i just looking somepony to love and care, i dont care if i said that thousands of times you can imagine how desperate i am, i been like that all my years to think different, but i wont give up and not fall in depression and sound like most people in internet, am gonna trascend and be a star for me and my future queen, ill make my own ship to the island i wanna be and share it with my love one... i dunno what to do... i feel like time is passing so fast and i fear to be an old man all alone, i dont want that, what can i do? every day im trying to imrpove myself to be popular and i fear that i can even get that, i try to inovate... am sorry am crying while am typing this, am in a crisis... dont worry im not gonna kill myself am get up and continue fighting even if i know that the chances are fading, i fight till last consequences and here i am still on the fight to be popular and have girlfriend but feel that im going down, now the question i wanna know is, think you can help me with that?

[Eloquence 2,076]

What's your advice on what to do when someone you love dearly betrays you but makes a big show of doing it unwillingly and claims they still love you too?

 

It's a little hard to answer that question without knowing the full story behind it, but I don't think I like the sound of this person if they did something to hurt you. I can't really think of a situation in which a betrayal in love would be necessary. They may very well still love you, but if a relationship of any kind is causing you pain then it usually isn't a good relationship to be in. I would say take my advice and think about the certain situation you are in, and try to be completely honest with yourself when you ask yourself whether or not you should cut ties with this person. Talk to a friend about it too, someone who knows what you're going through and will have your best interest at heart. I may be a love expert, but even I can only do so much from where I sit on a forum.

 

I am sorry to hear you are struggling with something sad, and I hope you find the right way to get through this and feel better <3

 

 

I've never been on a date before. What would qualify as a suitable date, and how should I ask the other person out?

 

A suitable date is anything that you and the other person will enjoy doing together! Lots of people think that a date has to be something classic like dinner and a movie, and that can be really nice and fun, but there are a lot of other ways to spend some romantic one on one time with someone. I think that the best kind of date you can take someone on is one where you figure out what they like and find a way to enjoy what they like with them! 

 

As for asking someone out, a simple "Would you like to go out with me?" will work just fine! I know it can be really scary to ask someone out, but if you've talked to them for a bit and would like to move your relationship with them into romantic territory then, well, the worst thing they can do is say no. My advice is just to be respectful, friendly, and considerate, and you should do just fine

<A lot of text>

 

I'm going to answer this one as myself and not as a pony, because you know, I used to feel that way too. I thought that it would solve all of my problems if I could just find someone to love me, and I thought my biggest problem was that I didn't fit in and wasn't popular and didn't have a boyfriend/girlfriend. But I got to the other side of that time in my life, and there is another side, and it is beautiful and wonderful, but I learned a little secret that I'm going to share with you.

 

Having a girlfriend isn't going to do what you think it will do for you.

 

We see in movies all the time that when you're broken and down someone is going to fall in love with you and pick you back up and make everything better for you. That doesn't happen. No one can make you love yourself but you, and to truly love someone else, and accept their love in return, you first have to be able to love yourself. Love is not about putting someone on a pedestal and treating them like they are better than you, it is about being their equal partner and understanding how to help them as much as they help you.

 

The only advice I can give you is to focus on yourself, to make friends first and figure yourself out before you go trying to understand someone else on the level required for a romantic partnership. Having a girlfriend will not make your life better until you are ready to enter into a full partnership with someone you see as your absolute equal.

 

Things will get better, but not because anyone will fix your problems for you. They'll get better because you work to improve yourself, to understand yourself and feel comfortable living the best life you can live, and because you'll find people, not a perfect girlfriend who lets you worship her, but friends who will like you just the way you are, and who you will like too, not because they are people who fill a need you think you have but because spending time with them genuinely makes you happy.

[FancyHorse 1,209]

Hi there!

 

So I'm rather clueless as to were to begin about this odd question. So, in recent times I've come to accepting that I have an attraction to my fellow stallions.

 

Once finally away from my discouragement (from both family and myself) I've decided to give a try in seeing fellow interested males.

 

My predicament is... Well where to begin? Is flirting with stallions any different then with mares?

 

Hehe, im clueless ^^"

 

Any advice?

[Eloquence 2,076]

Hi there!

 

So I'm rather clueless as to were to begin about this odd question. So, in recent times I've come to accepting that I have an attraction to my fellow stallions.

 

Once finally away from my discouragement (from both family and myself) I've decided to give a try in seeing fellow interested males.

 

My predicament is... Well where to begin? Is flirting with stallions any different then with mares?

 

Hehe, im clueless ^^"

 

Any advice?

 

First of all, I am very happy for you that you have taken such a big step in accepting and loving yourself! That's a hard thing to do when people around you aren't encouraging and supportive, and I am very proud of you for doing it!

 

Flirting with stallions is a little different in that, where any given mare is more likely to be interested in stallions than not, and given stallion is more likely to not be interested. Being a rare breed is not without certain drawbacks.

 

I would begin by seeking out LGBT friendly spaces in your area. If you go to school and your school has an LGBT group, join it right away! If you're looking to find a stallion who likes stallions, then going to places where such ponies tend to congregate is your best bet. You might also consider online dating in its various forms, as it gives you the neat option of doing a quick search to find lots of stallions who might be interested in you, and knowing ahead of time that they do in fact like other stallions.

 

I wish you the best of luck!

[Shadpearl 24]

Hey, Lovestruck! I've got a new one for you if you want to give it a whirl   

 

I am in quite the perfect relationship currently and very much smothered with love (in a good way!) The only problem is I tend to have a hard time coming up with good ways to reciprocate! 'Typical' date ideas seem to turn out as massive flops. Go to the movies? He falls asleep. Shopping? We both hate it. The Park? We both get bored. Dinner? Meh. He's a simple stallion that would rather eat plain foods than fancy stuff.

 

In short, I'm stumped!  :okiedokielokie: 

 

Any ideas for a less typical date?