Let's Write the Worst Fanfiction Ever

[Pony Joe 582]

After reading this thread, I had an idea.

 

Today we make history.

 

Today... we will write the single most repulsive, agonizing, grotesque, other-synonyms-for-terrible MLP:FiM fanfiction the world has ever seen.

 

__________

 

 

This is how it's going to go down:

 

The next person to post will choose a title and begin the story, and each one following will add, little by little, to the narrative. Illustrations are also gladly accepted!

 

I will be the one who decides when our masterpiece is finished.

 

__________

 

 

RULES:

 

1. No intentional spelling/punctuation errors. This fanfiction will be terrible only because of its content and structure. (This means run-on sentences, fragments, weird paragraph breaks, etc. are still okay!)

2. No Rule 34.

3. No extreme violence or gore.

4. Contribute at least a sentence! This isn't supposed to be a five-words-per-post story!

5. Contribute no more than a paragraph! This isn't your work, this is our work!

 

The rest, I leave to you. Just remember to pick a good title, first poster. No pressure, though. Though if you feel pressure, try to hold on to that feeling, as that's the proper response to being told that what you're about to write will go down in history.

[Strife 455]

As an aside, allow me to refer you to literary works such as Cupcakes and other drivel. It really is sad how a lot of the 'popular' stories are devoid of literary content.

[Whiteshade 1,426]

cupcakes could really work on the emotional development. Even though RD is best pony, meeeeeeeh was the prevailing sense throughout when she was slowly killed.

[LovingTolerance 131]

Too many people are trying to do this already.

 

Why not try to write the best fanfic ever?

It seems like less people are trying that.

[Pony Joe 582]

 

Why not try to write the best fanfic ever?

It seems like less people are trying that.

 

This is intended to be a collaborative creative effort. Usually, it's best if good stories are told by one person. And not made up as you go along.

 

And might I also mention the comic potential? I'm not going for something that's painful to read, I'm going for a so-bad-it's-good sort of deal, something that's actually fun to read because of it's sheer awfulness.

[Lostwanderer 366]

Cos this is going to go no where otherwise, i'll start, also we instantly lose to my immortal.

 

Once upon a time, in the magical land of Atlantica, there was a young boy named Timmioth. Timmioth was a troubled boy, full of happiness and joy, why was he troubled you ask? BECAUSE HE WAS BEING SPAT ON, THAT'S WHY!

[ASpark 49]

He was being spat on by a massive donkey, whose saliva was demonic and poisonous. Then Timmioth died of the evil saliva and his corpse was burnt by the heat of Atlantica.

[Mephala 2,633]

Atlantica was filled with angry buffawalruses, abominations of nature who were half buffalo (well bison. Buffalo is just more fun to say.) and half walrus. They hungrily ate the ashes of Timmioth.

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

Worst Fanfiction Ever II : The Revenge of Timmioth

 

Timmioth did not idly rest in death. His spirit wandered into Equestria...

 

And there he found numerous suitable hosts. The one that stood out the most to him was...

[PokeBolter 208]

Silver Belle pushes Sweetie Belle into an09088yrgwhwuhwurw Open FLAME ANddddd lets tsuj say after that it's 02u48u

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

Timmioth was intrigued by Silver Belle and decided to possess him.

 

Timmioth Belle went to go pester ponies in ponyville starting with...

[roguesoul 85]

... Lyra who had been playing her harp in the park. He took it and destroyed while Bon Bon cried tears of joy because her harp playing was terrible. And then Discord appeared and turned Timmioth Belle into a snail because sometimes Discord loved to mess with the spirits, you should see Star Swirl the Bearded, or should I say Star Face the Moustache.

[Dattebayo 2,850]

Around the same time, Derpy wandered in and, horrified at the gross bug in the sidewalk next to her dirt collection, Punched the snail right in the face, her Derp power being too much for Timmothy Belles thin shell. It let out a shriek before...

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

it exploded in a magical dust infected with a virus that spread timmiothicus's program to 1/3 of Ponyville. Around that time, Celestia was spanking a guard for...

[Stellafera 3,836]

...caning ponies, as she was mad when corporal punishment was used. It made her angry and want to hit things. Luna told Celestia to stop it but Celestia would not, so Luna...

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

...jumped out of a window. Unfortunately she forgot to flap and died.

[Archer Dash 163]

But not before accidentally the Nightmare Moon, sending Equestria into eternal darkness.

[Dattebayo 2,850]

Equestria plunged into darkness as little particles of Timmothy were inhaled by Twist, who was being Twist nearby.

She...

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

...coughed a little bit and then vomited spaghetti that told her she needed to kill all her friends.

[Guest90210 3,567]

But unknown to the residents of Ponyville, a looming, dark figure was approaching from the distance. His body structure slowly forming in the dense, eerie fog...Or is it all a dream? Only one brave stallion knows the answer...

Edited May 30, 2014 by Rivendare

[The Crimson Cross 7,532]

Shining Armour knew this time that Derpy hooves had finally reached godhood.

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

The fact completely escaped Derpy Hooves, however.

 

Timmothy Allen Belle saw his true nemesis in Derpy, and dug up the bones of Luna to...

[remove p l e a s e ? 800]

Give the bones of Luna to a Skeleton.

Edited February 18, 2016 by Tera the CLOAKER

[Magical Anarchy 177]

But Scooby Doo fought back. The pickles were meant to be his, as they were his father's who was a ceratin pony from...

[Kel_Grym 1,917]

...Kentucky. He founded a restaurant there in 1844 b.c. and was known as general badass.

 

General Badass once....