Chivarlry is dead?

[Stealth 11]

So I was reading an article(http://elitedaily.com/dating/sex/why-chivalry-is-dead-from-a-mans-perspective/)this morning and I don't know if it's just me and my friends but we are still chivalrous, I don't know if it's society that's changed or what but is it really dead? Ladies, would you want to be treated kindly or just used for sex? I don't see how we could move away from the basics. Anyway opinions? Is this guys just being sexist, as the comments say at the end? 

[Courageous Thunder Dash 7,824]

I'd have to say that some males have completely lost their chivalry. It's just sad in a way that those who've lost it, just settle a life full of sex and other dirty things. Truth is, they've fallen in a dangerous trance. 

[Noodles 109]

hay don't just blame the guys. I have been yelled at for opening a door for a lady. This has happened more than once.

[Stealth 11]

My apologies noodles, it's the fact that women think we are looking down on them instead of treating them like equals, I find that stupid. I'm trying to be nice and protective, when did that become sexist?! I just don't see how valuing a womans life over mine is sexist..just my 2 cents tho  

[Doc. Volt 2,561]

tsk...Chivarlry? here is dead.. long time ago... even women treat each other like shit... everyone just hate the other.. i rarelly see a sign of kindness to another person.. times ago i was in train... a guy without legs entered, i offered my place without thinking... but only 2 others did the same, i am not saying i am better or stupid things like that... is only that everyone is more selfish than times ago... probably it is only here in Italy.. but it sucks anyway... i have been yelled too because i opened a door for a girl.. she thought i was trying to get engage with her or some stupid things... just crazy... times ago i gifted a train ticket to a woman because she lost her, she looked at me like i was trying to rape her or something!!! bah... i just don't think about it and help everyone when i can... btw it is true... lot of guys are just idiot who don't give a damn...

[Noodles 109]

because to the type of person that yells at one for opening the door thinks your just doing it to get into her pants or up her skirt.

[Serbon div 386]

Ahahahahahhahahha xD America is doomed. This is one of the consequences of globalism. Chivalry is not quite dead here, it is nice to open a door to a lady, that's what I always do and nobody told me anything about it. It's just a nice thing to do. But if you aren't subtle in what you do that isn't chivalry then.

[Malinter 3,064]

Where I live I've still seen folks hold doors for each other and give up seats to those that need them, myself included. So its not dead here just yet. I do it because other than he being a simple kindness, I'd like to think someone would it do for me when I am older.

Edited December 5, 2013 by Malinter

[Noodles 109]

Sigh not saying that was My reason it is in the heads of some women. I just wanted to be nice and open the door for someone.

[Aniki 386]

Sadly I've experienced the same as Noodles. I suppose it was really just them trying to be overly "independent". (Doesn't even make sense)

 

1. Yes, I'm well aware you are capable of opening your own door but you were close behind me so I held it open.

2. I would of held it open for a man as well, so I don't even know. :okiedokielokie:

[Harmonic Revelations 8,835]

That would imply that it was ever alive in the first place, which would be misleading. People tend to idealize the past, but chivalry was pretty much dead since the dawn of time. However, I do believe in treating everybody with respect and dignity, regardless of gender.

Edited December 5, 2013 by Harmonic Revelations

[PoisonClaw 8,164]

I wouldn't say chivalry is completely dead, but it's most assuredly on life support by this point. I was personally always taught to treat people with respect regardless of gender, but I guess that makes me old fashioned now doesn't it?  

[Aniki 386]

I wouldn't say chivalry is completely dead, but it's most assuredly on life support by this point. I was personally always taught to treat people with respect regardless of gender, but I guess that makes me old fashioned now doesn't it?  

That seems a bit more new fashioned to me.

Well... I know it's something we were always taught in school and what kids are taught these days but it's a hit and miss whether any of it actually sticks.

[Lady Leopardess 393]

I don't think it's dead , I think it's just less common. I think in part because it's less common girls aren't used to such acts. Although my special some pony opens the car door for me and offers to carry my stuff .  On the other side though , if I get to the door first then I'll usually hold it open for him/or if people are close behind me   (although sometimes that'll get you stuck holding the door for awhile if there's a lot of people) . Or I'll help carry stuff if it's more practical /easier for my special somepony.  Or if I see someone having trouble ( like I offered one lady who was sitting next to me that I'd carry her stuff off the train so she didn't have to wait for assistance to come) 

[Lightning Bliss 1,674]

Well first off being a lady, on this topic... its kinda a double edged sword?

 

On one edge, I like to be treated equally and like one of the guys, if I want to race in NASCAR then I should be allowed to, or play football or go out into outerspace. Or play lazar tag (omg thats so fun) and I can open a door myself, I dont need some one or a man to hold my hand and open the door for me every time.

 

But on the other end, when it comes to feeling like a lady, which I love to feel like, to feel like I'm special to someone, thats when i fully embrace chilvery and actually very much do admire it. To me, when a man opends the door, taking the time to go out of his way to be considerate on me, even goes as far as "Here you go ma'am, after you " to me that makes me feel special, he's being polite and is being nice to me as not just a person but a lady who he does NOT see me as a "sex toy" I guess is the term. Me and my fiance have a pretty healthy balance though of chilvery in his end. He treats me as his equal, but then there are times when he goes the extra mile to let me know I'm special to him, whether that be he opends the door for me, carries my bags every now and then, or obviously goes out of his way to make me something to drink or eat when I'm down.

 

I don't want chilvery to be dead and any good guy here would know the benefits to it just from my statement above, it tells us girls that you care about us and don't see us so much just equals, but that we are important to you and are not just seen as 'sex' tools lol. No you don't have to do it all the time, some girls can get fed up with it if its over done ya, but every now and then again, doing something as simple as opening the door for a girl or lady and saying "here you go ma'am after you " trust me... it can make any girl smile

Edited December 5, 2013 by Lightning Bliss

[Champion RD92 8,658]

I hear that a lot of girls these days get mad if you try to be polite and open the door for them or something. I think that's pretty ridiculous.

Edited December 6, 2013 by Champion Rarity92

[Cygnus 60]

Chivalry refers to a specific way of behaving, not kindness towards others (which is also in a ditch). The modern variant is based off of old codes that have not been updated to meet the times, and no one can quite agree on what it's supposed to be.

 

I would find many of the ideas men are calling chivalrous insulting the same way I find unsolicited advice or attempts to relieve me of a workload insulting. These things make implications about my value in a community or environment through my capacity to function on the same level as and as a unit with my peers, insinuate that my work is a chore I can be relieved of rather than my pride and joy, and (when unsolicited advice) point out a problem in front of others rather than letting me handle it privately to save face.

 

I'll thank someone for holding the door for someone behind them as they should (and as I do for men and women), but if they go out of their way I'll refuse to enter.

Edited December 5, 2013 by Cygnus

[Mutemutt 773]

Well chivalry, as I understand its current state, is basically just special treatment for women, so I dislike it on principle alone. But then, in general situations, how can you tell when someone's being chivalrous or just being nice in general?

 

Still, I like to think that people treat each other kindly and respectfully regardless of gender (or because they want to get on their good side) instead of adhering to that archaic code. 

[Strong Copper 126]

I don't like dealing with other people. This isn't because I dislike other people per say, but because I have... trouble picking up social ques and things I should and shouldn't do.

 

Thus, over the years I have picked up a couple of methods of dealing with other people. Rules and responses that are pretty much pure reflex to me at the moment. While I do not engage by the code of Chivalry, I have picked up bits and pieces that make perfect sense to me and they help make up the core of what my values are.

 

So I'll hold a door open for someone. Maybe I'll get lip once or twice but the thank you's out number them. Chivalry is what you make of it now and days.

[Irish Mist 119]

I once had a girl chew me out for holding the door open for her, thinking it was just because I wanted into her pants. But the kicker is, I was standing right next to my girlfriend. 

 

But in all, this shit has to stop. If someone is just being nice to you, or holding a door open for you, it's called being polite, don't go and instantly assume there is some devious reason for it. People need to get their heads out of there asses and just accept the fact that someone out there is just nice. 

[Stealth 11]

Well chivalry, as I understand its current state, is basically just special treatment for women, so I dislike it on principle alone. But then, in general situations, how can you tell when someone's being chivalrous or just being nice in general?

 

Still, I like to think that people treat each other kindly and respectfully regardless of gender (or because they want to get on their good side) instead of adhering to that archaic code

It might be special treatment but shouldn't all women be treated special? Don't get me wrong I love a woman that can hunt and keep up with me but even if she could hold her own I would still give her special treatment.

[Mutemutt 773]

It might be special treatment but shouldn't all women be treated special? Don't get me wrong I love a woman that can hunt and keep up with me but even if she could hold her own I would still give her special treatment.

 

You make it sound as if it's common sense but I don't quite get it. Can you give me a good reason why women specifically should get special treatment?

Edited December 5, 2013 by Mutemutt

[RedMane 7]

I think that both men and women are at fault. Women have generally begun to become more independent and sometimes men trying to do things bother them. And yes, some women will get really angry for the slightest gesture of chivalry. I think that what needs to be kept in mind is the golden rule. If you wouldn't mind a woman opening the door, don't yell at a man for it, they're only trying to be nice. But men have generally become less chivalrous. I think everything needs to be a person to person basis, you can't clump everyone together and say "no one is chivalrous".

[Sugar Cube 4,843]

Well, I can't speak for women in general, but I know that I like having a little chivalry here and there. You can usually tell what's a general act of kindness and what's chivalry based on the act. I like the "ladies first" rule of men holding doors open for women. It's nice seeing men give up their spot on the bus for a woman or offering to carry some things that might be heavier for her as well. They're little things that women don't necessarily have to have, and obviously many women disprove of it. I don't necessarily expect it either but I do appreciate it. It's not special treatment, it's just good courteousness.

Edited December 5, 2013 by Sugar Cube

[Oran Schvoletski 49]

This reminds me of something that actually happened recently. I was at a Pizzeria where you take the pizza home and bake it yourself. I sat down to wait for my order and noticed a middle-aged woman carrying several boxes as well as drinks. There was no way she could easily maneuver a door with her hands full but she was a second away from the door. So I sorta awkwardly jumped up and half-ran over and opened it for her. She smiled and said "Well I'll be, chivalry's not dead," and walked out. I thought about it for a moment.

 

I guess the main reason I pasted this semi-related story here is because I tend to do things for people, regardless of who they are. I mean, it tends to be me helping out women more-so than men, but only by coincidence or some odd scientific fact I'm unaware of. Maybe that's not chivalry then, but it's what I think everyone should be in the habit of doing.