Post funny jokes here

[Dashy 4 Ever 4,832]

No innapropriate jokes.

One day, a man and his wife were eating dinner. At one point, she dropped some tomato sauce on her dress. "Honey, I look like a pig!" "Yes, you also spilled tomato sauce on you."

One day, a doctor told a man, "sir, I'm afraid you have a disease where you can't remember things and also cancer. "Well, at least I don't have cancer", replied the patient. 

One day at a bar, two fat women entered. A guy noticed a deep accent in their voices. "Hey, are you from Ireland with those accent of yours?" "What? No!! We're from Whales you smart-ass!!!" The guy chuckled. "Well we do have 2 whales over here so that makes sense."

That's all I could remember of that night.

 

See if you can figure them out.

[Rawzy 1,302]

Why did the bug cross the road?

Spoiler

It doesn't matter because he fell down the storm drain on the way.

I'm sorry, that was bad.

[Im_not_crazy_im_just 1,814]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

 

because she thought that there was a headless horse chasing her. 

[IsraelYabuki 439]

Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great Fall? To make up for a crummy Summer! LOL

You know, money has always been a problem. I'm not putting ya on, I never had a penny to my name, so I changed my name. LOL

I'm not apologizing for my actions, no siree. As a matter of fact, there's only one dude I take my hat off to: my barbor! LOL