The Corrupted Wish Game

[Antismurf9001 1,271]

Granted, but despite the fact that it is the best game to come out since Ocarina of Time, it is exclusively for a system that you don't own.

 

I wish my robot avatar had an anti-pigeon feces shield.  It's getting really hard to see with all of this bird-crap.

 

EDIT: bloody ninjas!

 

Granted, but you're a pegasus without wings.  You can still walk on clouds though.

Edited January 12, 2013 by antismurf9001

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted, but the shield only protects it from pigeon feces, and now there's hawk and eagle (and pegasus) crap everywhere.

 

I wish I was a hawk so i could (literally) crap all over your shield. 

[Erza 581]

Granted, now he mounted auto-aim against hawks.

I wish that i could get fluttershy as pet :3

[Antismurf9001 1,271]

Granted, but you've made her sad because she doesn't want to be thought of as a pet.  (thanks for the auto-aim by the way)

 

I wish my shield could convert the crap of any avian species into fuel and ammunition.

[Erza 581]

Granted, now if any spark get so close to your robot it will set on fire! "because the crap turned into fuel that is flammable!"

I wish that i live in equestria!

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but it's as a human... And Xenolestia doesn't take too kindly to humans.

 

I wish my Air Force could escape this damned black hole.

[CinemaBrony 1,276]

Granted! Your Air Force quickly winds up in another black hole!

I wish fried chicken could be a diet food.

Edited January 13, 2013 by CinemaBrony

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but diet fried chicken tastes inconceivably bad.

 

I wish my Air Force was now black hole proof.

[Callisto 1,877]

Granted, but somehow the black holes become stronger and manange to kill your air force.

 

I wish I remembered to wear my space suit to my moon house that I don't have to pay rent on.

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but the space bank forcloses on you.

 

I wish I had a battle star so I can sell chaos a moon house.

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted, but I threw a wrench at its engines and it exploded.

 

I wish I hadn't left my stash of doritos inside your bucking battle star before wrenching it.

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but doing so fixes my battle star

 

I wish chaos' moon house wasn't repoed by me

[Antismurf9001 1,271]

Granted, but this causes a lunar revolution.  What exactly is revolting, I'm not sure, but those guys are revolting hard.

 

I wish I was on the moon so I wouldn't light on fire.  (Look!  The plotlines are converging!  This is totally going to be the greatest story in the history of mankind.  We should write a book.)

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but you are caught in the battle of base 336 (our nuclear stockpile... not sure why I built that thing)

 

I wish our nuclear stockpile didn't blow up.

[Rocco 567]

granted, but in light of resent events you will have to convert your nuclear stock pile into weapons of mass destruction! but you dont have a weapons expert on board that will be able to convert the depleted isotopes into rich 235 ore. you have the facilities and personnel but no brains. just then i hits you, you know a person who can pull off such a feat! the ironically named ThatSpiritofChaos or jeff for short. to find him you must venture to the deepest darkest parts of the united states, a place so horrible that time its self has forgotten it existed. that place is Atlanta GA. you depart from the moon under the cover of antismurf's poo sheild, protecting you from the poo flinging homeless moon men, who's revolt escalated after they were supercharged from your atomic pile into heat seeking poo howitzers. they continue to ravage the moon as you make your escape. shortly there after you make land fall in the seedy town of Atlanta, the city stands in ruins and the streets filled with peach pits. you stumble and fall over a large mass of dead body, you look down to see its non other than the mangled body of Rosie O'Donnell. you gasp as a alarming amount of peach pits expel from her mouth and exclaim " well thats just the pits"! you laugh amused by your own antics, but this would be your down fall. your laughter attracts hungry hungry hobos to you location, you stumble to get up as they descend upon you but Rosie O'Donnell reanimates into a hungry hungry hobo and snatches your leg.you squirm for freedom but her vice like grip is like ....well....um... Rosie O'Donnell holding a twinkie . just well all hope is lost, a shot rigs out and Rosie O'Hobo's head explodes. shot after shot and head after head explodes and a quickly as it all started its over. you lay there in awe as to figures uproch you from a dark ally way. soon its clear that its non other than Chaos and I welding m16's and leaf blowers rigged up to 5 gallon gasoline cans to make makeshift flamethrowers. i stand over you and offer my hand to help you up.

 

me: fancy seeing you here, i though you were dead after what happened in that girl scout cookie factory in Milwaukee. oh and thanks for leaving me for dead on this god forsaken rock. 

 

 

you: thats just what i wanted you to think with your soft earthling brain, but theres no time for this my moon base has been over run with atomic powered poo shooting heat seeking moon men and my zombie airforce keeps getting stuck in black holes!

 

me: well did you feed them reese's cups first? damn it don't tell me you didn't!! no wander there all dying in black holes!

 

you: no time to explain, jeff can you turn nuclear waste into uranium 235?

 

jeff: hay yes i can, all i need is c4, string cheese, 3 mojo golf balls and this mustache *pulls out mustache and puts it on and rubs hooves together menacingly*

 

you: thank god! quick in the ship we dont have much time!

 

me: ho hold up, first i have something for you to see. it seems this goes deeper than  a failed bank robbery, this goes much much further in fact.

 

you ; how far?

 

me: to the one place that has always be jealous of us, the most evil place on the face of the earth

 

you: you dont mean *hooves to face , and gasp*

 

me: thats right New Jersey

 

 

tune in next time! 

 

 

 

Damn it that the second time!

 

i wish i could come up with more good ideas for this story so i could make it a fan fic

Edited January 13, 2013 by dash blast

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted, but there's no light so I can't read what's there without a flashlight. 

 

I wish I had a flashlight to read what was above this wish.

 

(highlight the top)

Edited January 13, 2013 by Leatherbehlt

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but your flashlight has an arc bulb and cooks everything (including you, probably shouldn't have based it on your rage beams)

 

I wish this damned rebellion was over... the rebels are late on their rent.

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted, because the rebels lost and the Italian Government are going to take over the moon.

 

I wish I could help the martian population stop the italian government from taking over the moon. 

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but my deep space real estate agency swoops in to return everything to its rightful owner, ME.

 

I wish the italians could learn their place and stop trying to invade me (this is like the fourth time)

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted, so they move to america and become jersey shore "bruhs", and destroy America, and now all the redneck patriots are mad at you for breaking the country. Meanwhile my martian friends kidnap half of them, brainwash them to not pay rent after moving to the moon, and plunge your company into deep debt.

 

I wish I had a bigger boot to kick the moon.

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but you buy the boot from us, bringing us out of debt.

 

I wish the italians would LEARN THEIR PLACE and stop doing stupid things.

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted.The Italians (including jersey Italians) stop doing stupid things. Now that the Jersey drunkies are done being dumb, Jersey Shore becomes less interesting and the american TV industry fails. With no TV, american civvies start doing something with their lives and move to the moon. Now your business is booming and you become corrupt from profit overdose just like trixie in her last episode. Now Steven Hawkings does what twilight did and restores you back to normal by destroying your business and sending the newly unTVhypnotised Americans back to earth to get some peaches for his black hole machine which he'll use in a couple of days to suck up (no homo) your moon. Then he runs over your foot with his wheelchair.

 

I wish I had some hot sauce.

[Victor van Dort 202]

Granted, but the sauce is made of acidic compound that melts the bottle, travels down to the Earth's core, and causes the Earth to explode.

I wish my headphones were more comfortable.

[FractalMoon 378]

Granted, but PETA comes and destroys them for using baby seal leather

 

I wish stephen hawking would stop building black hole machines... this is like the fourth this week

[Leatherbehlt 465]

Granted, but now they're orange (*cough* jersey tan*cough*) hole machines. Celestia knows how nasty those things smell. Plus, the scent gets in your oxygen tank and makes you go blind, so you trip down the stairs after going blind.

 

I wish that I won't get ninja'd on this post.