Count to a million

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324.781

 

I like you don't understand them and I rofl here :'D

 

There are only 10 kinds of people in this world: those who know binary and those who don’t.

[Kawaii Besu 28,011]

324781

 

Me neither, Raritas.

 

[lomk 20,663]

324xxx

 

Alright.

 

I love you Raritas

[Deae Rising Shine~ 55,271]

324.784

 

Grand Prix from Malaysia 2013 Qualifying 2

1.Fernando Alonso 1,45.503

2.Lewis Hamilton 1,45.876

3.Sebastian Vettel 1,46.040

4.Mark Webber 1,46.206

5.Felipe Massa 1,46.354

6.Nico Rosberg 1,46.463

7.Rising Shine 1,46.517

8.Jenson Button 1,46.923

9.Kimi Räikkönen 1,47.095

10.Sergio Perez 1,47.154

11.Nico Hülkenberg 1,47.199

 

...

 

13.Paul di Resta 1,48.822

 

...

 

16.Daniel Ricciardo 1,49.175

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324783

 

Two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, “So what’ll it be?”

The first string says, “I think I’ll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy~~owmc63^Dz x.xvcu”

“Please excuse my friend,” the second string says, “He isn’t null-terminated.”

 

:lol:
:lol:
That one is even better than the 8 bytes walk into a bar one xD

[lomk 20,663]

324xxx

 

Why do programmers confuse Halloween for Christmas?

 

Because Oct 31 = Dec 25

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324787

 

DOS: Defunct Operating System
WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System

MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs

IBM: I Blame Microsoft

MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers

APPLE: Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity

 

Woona, I posted that already :comeatus:

Edited July 24, 2015 by CAPTNCTAM

[Deano 1,704]

324784

 

These are priceless

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324.789

 

Why computers are like men:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

 

Why computers are like women:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Edited July 24, 2015 by CAPTNCTAM

[Raritas 6,820]

324'789

Alright.

I love you Raritas

 

Likewise as a friend ol' buddy ol' pal

 

MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers

 

LOL 

 

Well I guess I'm in with this group xD 

[lomk 20,663]

324xxx

 

Okay.

 

A computer science student is studying under a tree when another pulls up on a new bike. The first student asks "Nice bike. Where'd you get it?"

 

The second student replied, "A girl came to me on her bike, took off her clothes, and told me I could have anything I wanted. So I got the bike"

 

"Good choice! The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway!"

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324792

 

:'D

 

Q: How do you tell an introverted computer scientist from an extroverted computer scientist?

A: An extroverted computer scientist looks at your shoes when he talks to you.

[PoisonClaw 8,164]

324,793

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324.794

 

A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"

[BastementSparkle 20,326]

324795

 

Hi Poison.

Edited July 24, 2015 by BaysemeantPoneigh

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324.796

 

When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb. :'D

[Kawaii Besu 28,011]

324796

 

 

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324798

 

["hip","hip"]

(hip hip array!)

Edited July 24, 2015 by CAPTNCTAM

[Deae Rising Shine~ 55,271]

324.798

 

Grand Prix from Malaysia 2013 Qualifying

1.Fernando Alonso/Ferrari

2.Sebastian Vettel/Red Bull

3.Lewis Hamilton/Mercedes

4.Mark Webber/Red Bull

5.Nico Rosberg/Mercedes

6.Felipe Massa/Ferrari

7.Rising Shine/Marussia

8.Jenson Button/McLaren

9.Sergio Perez/McLaren

10.Kimi Räikkönen/Lotus

11.Nico Hülkenberg/Sauber

 

...

 

13.Paul di Resta/Force India

 

...

 

16.Daniel Ricciardo/Toro Rosso

 

...

 

18.Valtteri Bottas/Williams

 

...

 

21.Jules Bianchi/Marussia

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324799

 

[lomk 20,663]

324xxx

 

There are three types of lies

 

Lies, damned lies, and benchmarks.

[Deano 1,704]

3247##

 

324.789

 

Why computers are like men:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

 

Why computers are like women:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

 

That is gold...

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324.801

 

Software is like sex: It's better when it's free.

-Linus Torvalds

 

ALL HAIL LINUS!

 

(that's the guy who made Linux )

[Deano 1,704]

324802

 

324xxx

 

There are three types of lies

 

Lies, damned lies, and benchmarks.

And "preferred lies" :comeatus:

 

*makes joke no one who doesn't know the difference between a 7 and and 8 iron will get* 

Edited July 24, 2015 by Nectar

[DasCapschen 7,766]

324.805

 

----

 

Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Yes.