Thread finished. It is broken down into these categories in bold writing and underlined.
Guideline for Mentors
Guideline for Mentees (people sharing their goals)
Application for Mentees/sharing your goals
Application to be a Mentor
Hey everypony. Have you ever made a goal, but have never stuck to it, because there was nobody around to keep pestering you on how you're doing. You only relied on yourself and it was easy to say "I can't be bothered to yourself?" But when you're being held publically accountable it can make it easier to achieve goals.
I want to make a thread that requires help from the whole Brony/Pegasister community, where you can fill out an application form for any goals you can achieve.
Anyone who wants to be a mentor for someone will also fill out a form. I'd prefer it if you became a mentor for the first person who posted that doesn't have a mentor yet. But if some other person has a goal in an area you specialize in, say "They're studying for a physics exam, and you have a degree in physics" then you can choose to have them as a mentee instead. So whilst I'd prefer you to just take first in first serve, I think it's also important for you to mentor someone who you have the full capacity of skills to be able to help.
A mentors job is simple. To check up with their mentee once a week or once a month in PM, and ask their mentee to give them a written report on their goal.
Before I give you the applications format. Underneath is the guidelines for Mentors to follow. There is also a guideline for Mentees to follow. This is just to ensure that everyone gets the most out of this.
Guideline for Mentors
# 1 You're responsibility is to ask your mentee once a week or once a month, depending on what both of you agreed too for a written report. To make sure the written report isn't made up. It's best to establish some parameters.
The parameters you arrange depends on the mentee and their goal. So lets look at some examples. The mentee has an exam coming up in 30 days and he has 30 concepts to learn. He could learn one concept a day, and after a week give you a report on 7 concepts.
Ask them what they had trouble with, what they found easy. Help them if you can. And if you can't tell them to check out this homework thread for homework help. The thread was created by
If the goal is longer, say a weight loss goal that spans over a year. They might only want to report to you once a month. Now regarding weight loss, it is very normal and common to only lose 10% of your body weight in 6 months. When you follow the tried and true method of exercise and moderate healthy eating. Keep a track of your calories etc, then don't be surprised if a whole year goes by and you have only gone from 100 kg to 81 kg this is realistic. Also you are allowed to eat junk food in moderation.
Regarding weight loss goals, go see a doctor and dietician, so that you have a plan you can follow before you apply to have a mentor. As a mentor check with them regularly. Like say once a month. Because losing weight realistically and healthily is a slow process. It might be better to ask them to give you the foods they ate over the week, their calorie report, praise them over the smallest amount of weight loss even if it's only 1 kilogram after a whole month, and maybe ask them to give you a report on anything else that means something. Say "lower blood pressure" "lower blood cholestorol" or even "a lower resting heart rate" which means they are getting fitter. So in other words don't put all the focus on their weight loss, but in the whole scenario that leads to their health and wellbeing. And praise them for that. So if they can run a kilometre longer than they used to but haven't lost much weight, jump up and down in the air for them and tell them they're on the right track.
Regarding exercising for health and fun. Again check with your doctor if you don't feel confident and eat healthy. As a mentor you should ask them questions like "How much can you lift now?" say if they're weight training and then when they check back in with you "Ask them how much they can lift now?" And ask them for their reps. If they are doing cardio training ask them for how their resting heart rate has improved over time, or whether they can run longer than before.
These are just a few examples and the questions you ask depend on your mentee and their goal.
#2 Be honest but kind. Be fair but strict.
This means that if your mentee fails to report what they said they would report. So if they said they'd get back to to you with x number of reps or x number of blah blah or even a food diary or something like that or whatever but they don't..then ask them what the situation was:
If the situation was stress, sadness, feeling depressed and unmotivated and lack of self confidence in themselves to to achieve their goal. Then give them encouragement. Give them advice, ask them if they would like to restart their goal from where they left off. And maybe send them regular encouragement beyond the reports.
If it's a case of "I just couldn't be bothered" then you need to give them tough love. You don't want to be too fairy fluffy, because you don't want them to feel like they don't need to push themselves. So just be politely honest. You could say "As your mentor I expect you to try your best in achieving your goals. You might not care, but I care about your success. And you made a public commitment to me, and so I would be grateful if you could keep it." Like in a "Screw it not even my priority moment" you want to be straight up no beating around the bush with them. Because that's what they need. If you act too fairy fluffy they won't be motivated because they know you'll just come back with "A
If they're pushing themselves to far and their goal is unrealistic, give them advice for how they can tweak their goal. And even if you think their goal is too easy and that they can do better than that, then tell them straight up
So it all depends on the mentor and mentee and the persons individual goals.
And most importantly respect your mentee. Only be straight up and strict if you really have to be. Some excuses are genuine, and some are not and as a mentor you need to be wise in what you decide is or is not a genuine excuse. If your mentee disagrees then speak over it politely.
Just be supportive, honest, fair, but strict when you need to be.
Guidelines for mentees
Make sure you have specific goals you want to achieve.
Make sure you have date deadlines- but leave a healthy amount of room for social life, fun stuff, and family emergencies etc
Make sure you have a plan of mini goals that you must complete each day leading up to your goal.
Make sure you respect your mentor. Your mentors job isn't to sugar talk you. So if you fail to complete job due to a "I can't be bothered attitude" then expect to be told very honestly by your mentor that they expect better from you.
If you disagree with your mentor, discuss this and come to a solution in a civil manner, or agree to disagree.
Applications for goal achievement
What is your goal?
Please be very specific. Tell us what you want to achieve. Tell us what the deadline is.
Your goal plan?
What mini steps are you going to take each day to achieve your goal? This is also so your mentor knows what questions to ask you whenever they check in PM with you.
Make sure your goal is S.M.A.R.T
Specific: What are the exact things you will do each day to lead up to your major goal.
Measurable: Did you complete your mini goals for that day
Achieveable: Make sure you are not selling yourself short or going in way over your head
Realistic: Don't make a goal that your going to be able to run a marathon in a week when you've been a couch potato for 20 years
Time frame: I.e by setting mini goals
Why is this goal important to you?
People who know the why behind something are more likely to achieve it.
How often would you like your mentor to check in with you?
Once a week? Or Once a month?
Will you keep in contact with your mentor?
To let your mentor know if you had to change a part of your goal plan because it was unrealistic.
Or to let your mentor know if you're struggling or whatever.
The goal promise
I think it's important that you type up the promise below instead of copy pasting it. Because when you feel like you've made a promise to somebody you are more likely to stick with something.
I (fill in your Brony/Pegasister username here) promise anyone who wishes to mentor me that I will stick to my mini goals and my mega goal as best as I can and report to you once a week or once a month. I promise that I will strive to do the best I am able and minimize excuses. I also promise that I will strive to meet my deadlines and if I am unable to do so then I will see if the goal needs to be adjusted, or if my motivation and attitude needs to be adjusted.
Application for mentors
Do you promise to be honest but strict. Fair but kind, and supportive?
Like if they're depressed be supportive
If they don't believe in themselves be supportive
If it's hospital visit or something be understanding
But if you think it's just a bad attitude, then don't hesitate to be polite but honest.
Do you promise to give help and advice. Praise and discipline.
Do you promise to ask your mentee for a report once a week or once a month, and if you don't want to/are unable to do this anymore do your promise to let your mentee know?
How many mentees do you think you can handle?
1? 2? 3? You can have up to 5 mentees max
Will you PM someone to let them know you would like to be their mentor?
Remember writing the promise is better than copy pasting it. As most of us are designed to keep promises as best as we can.
I (insert brony/pegasister username here) promise to check in with my mentee(s) once a week/once a month depending on what they asked for. I promise to be supportive, encouraging, honest, strict, fair, and kind. I promise to let my mentee(s) know if I can no longer mentor them.
If your mentor can no longer mentor you. Then just ask for a new mentor and give a link to the page your application post is on. So your new mentor knows your goals and how to help you.
I hope this helps everypony.