Lines you'll never catch FIM characters saying.

[cmarston1 5,959]

Celestia: Twilight, neither you or your friends will be required to protect Equestria today.  I got this situation all under control.

 

 

Twilight: Spike, what kind of comics are you reading?

Spike: (Blushes)

 

 

Mayor Mare:  Mr Cake you Are the father!

Edited February 10, 2016 by cmarston1

[Sazama Ichida 2,367]

Twilight: Spike, what kind of comics are you reading?

Spike: Playcolt... (Blushes)

Fixed that for you. XD

 

Twilight: My brain hurts from all this reading...

 

Pinkie Pie: I wanna watch some cement dry! =D

 

Rainbow Dash: You suck Tank. I should've picked the falcon instead...

 

Rarity: I am not a marshmallow!

 

Applejack: Ah sure wish ah was as purdy as a city girl...

 

Fluttershy: I am not cute!!!

[Saroth 102]

Celestia: "Screw this, I'll deal with it myself."

[QuirkyUsername 1,576]

Twilight will never say anything Tara Strong said when voice acting Juliet in Lollipop Chainsaw

[Singe 2,111]

Rainbow Dash: Did you see how I tackled Spike? He ain't walking ever again.

 

Derpy Hooves: I written a book called the Fifty Shades of Derpy.

 

Maud Pie: This one guy claimed to have rock hard abs, they were fake.

 

Applejack: You have to stop hounding that girl.

Rarity: I will not rest until I find out if they are real or fake.

 

Luna: *Points at their short skirts.* Dress code, ladies. We're going to have a long talk in my office with your parents. 

 

Rarity: School uniforms?! Forget, this school I'm out of here!

[PinkieatHeart 208]

Princess Celestia: I refuse to lower the sun. Equestria will spend the rest of eternity in bright, scorching sunlight! *insert evil laugh here*

 

Luna: Alright, somepony send her ass to the sun then. If I can't do this sort of thing, neither can she.

[Singe 2,111]

Spike: How was I suppose to know "Giddy up ride on pony" was offensive?

 

Sunset Shimmer: So you're this world's Twilight. *Looks Twilight over.* Flash is going to have some competition.

 

Luna: Sister, there have been complaints about Climate Change.

Celestia: Fine, I'll move the Sun away a few inches.

 

Apple Bloom: My sister wants to marry me to an apple tree.

 

Sweetie Belle: Don't worry I got this. It'll be 300 bits for all three of us.

 

Twilight Sparkle: I can't always rely on my friends to solve these problems. So I'm going to outsource and hire some mercenaries.

Spike: Spine Ripper would be great to help convince ponies to get along.

[Singe 2,111]

Cadance: Thank you Rarity for showing me how to eat a Popsicle.

 

Pinkie Pie: I'm going to have a house made entirely out sweets and there is no way it will back fire.

 

Twilight Sparkle: Spike has been scared since he read Tank Mare and seen a dragon's head explode.

 

Twilight Sparkle: What should I do as a princess?

Celestia: You can stand around and wave to the subjects. That's what I usually do.

 

Fluttershy: I do not have tail extensions. *Trips over her tail.*

[crispy fries 432]

Twilight Sparkle: Read my fanfic.

 

Fluttershy: My house always smells like animal crap.

 

Applejack: Have fun at college, Applebloom.

 

Rarity: Do you want to borrow my copy of Fifty Shades Of Gray?

 

Pinkie Pie: I don't have a permit for my party cannon.

 

Rainbowdash: I lost a race that one time.

[Singe 2,111]

Pinkie Pie: What's this?

Rarity: That's just a film I did when I was a few years younger to get by. Not for children's eyes.

Pinkie Pie: Why? Is it because a stud talked you into doing a film about *wink* then you had to do *wink* followed by more *wink.*

Rarity: What is wrong with your eye? The film was a very boring documentary about my time as a....

Pinkie Pie: Zzzzzzzzzzzz.

 

Applejack: *Drunk* And I was like, if you want to go out on a date with me. Kiss that apple tree.

 

Applejack: *Drunk* A mop in a dress is prettier than Rarity.

 

Applejack: *Drunk* Nah, I just ignored more than half of your babbling Twilight.

 

Applejack: *Drunk* Sweets taste much better after mixed in the stomach, Pinkie Pie.

 

Applejack: *Drunk* I'm just going to sleep at the foot of your bed like a dog, Fluttershy.

 

Applejack:: *Drunk* Did I ever tell you how much the others secretly despise you?

Edited February 26, 2016 by Singe

[Singe 2,111]

Rarity: I'll draw more eyes on us by making our skirts a few inches shorter.

 

Pinkie Pie: I swallowed a balloon.

 

Sunset Shimmer: *Freaked out.* What in the world were they just teaching in that class?!

 

Flash Sentry: So I was thinking...

Twilight Sparkle: Keep your hands to yourself.

Flash Sentry: *Sad face*

 

Spike: I'm sure you girls would like to know what Spike has been doing.

 

Flash Sentry: The one day I wear these tight jeans and Twilight Sparkle just came back.

Edited March 5, 2016 by Singe

[Fawkes The Phoenix 737]

Applejack: This sentence is false.

Edited March 7, 2016 by Fawkes The Phoenix

[----- 477]

Twilight: I am glad that Tirek blown up my the golden oak library. 

 

Fluttershy: I gonna kill this pet! 

 

Pinkie Pie: Yay, I got diabetes! ~ 

 

Rarity: I totally love green manes. 

 

Applejack: Granny Smith is actually my mother. 

 

Rainbow Dash: Call me Monochrome Dash now. 

Spike: I have a crush on Discord. 

 

Sunset Shimmer: Flash looks so hot in that borat swimsuit. 

 

Princess Cadance: Shining, stop throwing our daughter against the wall!!! 

Edited March 7, 2016 by Fluidty

[Singe 2,111]

Applejack: Rainbow Dash you've failed as many times as Rarity goes through boyfriends.

 

Rarity: He was almost the right one, until he dropped that 'I have a kid.' and I was like 'Rarity is not going to be some filly's mama.'

 

Flash Sentry: Well we're finally alone...and I see you're busy looking for way to escape.

 

Fluttershy: *Walks into the classroom wearing a furry bunny costume.* Don't judge me.

 

Sunset Shimmer: I'll be your friend Twilight and I will own you for ever.

 

Flash Sentry: *Bursts into the girls locker room.* Has anyone heard from Twilight?

 

Pinkie Pie: That wasn't a party in the back alley!

Edited March 20, 2016 by Singe

[Flutterstep 47,088]

Fluttershy: "What? Me and Vinyl friends? Don't be silly. She just likes me for my body."

 

Twilight: "Has anyone else notice how Flash usally only hangs around by himself? What a loner."

 

Apple Jack: "I've always preferred the city life. But ya can't get a good ol' weed crop up an growing without ponies asking questions. Um…ah mean, metaphorically speaking, of course."

 

Pinkie Pie: "Have you girls ever realised that we are just clichés and stereotypes with very little depth? I'd understand if you want to stay in denial."

 

Rainbow: "Actually, this was all my fault. I take full responsibility; you had nothing to do with it at all."

 

Rarity: "You wanna hear a joke? Men cooking."

[Luminance 2,186]

Twilight- "I'll just google it instead"

 

Pinkie Pie- "I'll just party alone then"

 

Fluttershy- "Go away, smelly creatures!"

 

Applejack- "I hate apple everything"

 

Rainbow Dash- "let's just give up"

 

Rarity- "Yes Spike, I Do"

 

Starlight- "Hello Sunset Shimmer, I didn't know you came from another dimension"

 

Sunset- "My hair looks like bacon to you guys?"

 

Spike- "I'm marrying Rarity!"

[Sazama Ichida 2,367]

My God this topic is so much fun...

Rarity: Does this dress make my flank look big?

Rainbow Dash: I'm just gonna lay here on this cloud and do absolutely nothing all day. I'll be a regular cloud potato!

 

[Singe 2,111]

Starlight Glimmer: That's what I did. Very embarrassing.

Sunburst: At least you're not a registered offender.

Starlight Glimmer: Wow. I am shocked.

 

Applejack: Keep your eyes peeled for dingoes. They'll eat your baby.

 

Rainbow Dash: Wait until the new baby checks out this toy. It's at least 50% in the lead.

 

Shining Armor: I can't find Flurry Heart.

Cadance: Oh, I know where she's hiding. *Sigh.*  I can't go through those big wings again.

Shining Armor: ...What?

 

Celestia: It's our greatest foe, nature.

 

Rarity: My nose can't stand being around you anymore. Applejack smells like farm. Fluttershy smells like animals. Rainbow Dash smells like a boys locker room. Pinkie Pie smells like the dirty kitchen of a restaurant. Sunset Shimmer smells like a dumpster. Twilight Sparkle smells like a meth lab in a basement.

 

Starlight Glimmer: Then I guess you're my second friend.

Spike: Really. Please go out with me?

Starlight Glimmer: Um....no.

 

Discord: Remember who you're messing with Twilight. One snap my fingers, you and your friends will be the plot of an anime harem. 

Edited April 2, 2016 by Singe

[heavens-champion 1,905]

Any of them saying the F word.

[Weird Thing 10]

They might say these things if they get hypnotised or if they completely change who they are.

Edited April 2, 2016 by Weird Thing

[Sazama Ichida 2,367]

Any of them saying the F word.

Or any swear word. That goes without saying. But I would love to hear them say things like: "Celestiadamn", "Flankhole", "Buck off" "What the Tartarus?" etc. XD

[heavens-champion 1,905]

Or any swear word. That goes without saying. But I would love to hear them say things like: "Celestiadamn", "Flankhole", "Buck off" "What the Tartarus?" etc. XD

There's no way they can get away with that first one.

[Sazama Ichida 2,367]

There's no way they can get away with that first one.

It's still a moot point though. Because the show is obviously never going to have any swear words in it.

[heavens-champion 1,905]

It's still a moot point though. Because the show is obviously never going to have any swear words in it.

Too true. leave swear words in adult content.

[Singe 2,111]

Applejack: I make extra money on the side by having guys pay me to serve them some home cooking and then *saxophone music plays* they get some of my delicious apple pie for dessert.

Rarity: It's like guys will pay for menial things we do. Who knew guys would pay to watch me try on clothes.

Twilight Sparkle: I had a few guys pay me to put on glasses and look at them perplexed.

Pinkie Pie: Guys just pay to watch me eat food with my tongue.

Fluttershy: I got paid for making cutesy animal calls.

 

Pinkie Pie: The whip cream was actually part of a revenge prank where we cover you with whip cream while you're asleep, take photos, and post them online. We decided that was a bit extreme.

Sunset Shimmer: I'm not feeling comfortable staying here any longer.

 

Twilight Sparkle: Hi, I'm Twilight Sparkle. You may know me as the Princess of Friendship. Now I want to announce that I will be doing my own show called "The Friendship Critic". On this show I'll review the serious depths of media and rate the friendships of characters. Join me ever weeknight for analysis of friendship.

 

Pinkie Pie: The new director said I couldn't break the 4th wall anymore or I'll get a pay cut. *Looks at camera.*

 

Rarity: *Interview* Compared to the other five, I'm the sane one.

 

Rarity: Rainbow Dash at least won't fall from grace like that dishonorable Wonderbolt, when it comes time for a new young upstart to out performs her.

Rainbow Dash: *Realization Stare.* Yeah...

Edited April 3, 2016 by Singe