What's the hardest lesson you've ever had to learn?

[Splashee 28,568]

Talking too loudly. IRL my friends at the time (teenager) was fed up with my loudness (because of my mild ADHD and other LETTERS). So they started ignoring me (one of my friends made the rule for everyone, and they just stuck with it). I was actually shut off from their conversation everytime I was talking or asking something. This was very evil and I felt very hurt.

 

Well guess what? It was hard for me. But I finally realized they responded once I lowered my voice. And it took a while, but I learned it the evil hard way. Today I am always caution when talking to others, always aware of my voice and volume.

 

 

[Lucky Bolt 35,088]

When buying a vehicle off Craigslist, DONT BUY IT AND DRIVE AWAY WITHOUT CHECKING IT OVER FIRST. 

[Clawdeen 15,661]

Be careful who you trust 

[ExplosionMare 18,093]

I learned I need to be more upfront about things that bother me rather than assume people will figure it out or be able to take a hint I give them

[Lord Chin Chin 1,211]

A bit dark maybe but it was wgen my mum passed away, before she passed she told me not to take life for granted, enjoy life to the full and be kind

Its been over a year but it still really hurts, it taufht me to value peooke in your life toi since they wont always be here 😔

 

[TBD 17,258]

Learning how to say “good byes”. I’m still struggle with that and currently learning. I tend to cling to the past too much..

[Hidden_Dusk 16]

Learning how to stop and think before I speak.

It's really put me in a mindset where I actually have to stop, and listen to a conversation before going on with my day. With ADHD it's pretty difficult, but overtime I was able to do it easily.

 

Before that, I would always interrupt, or get angry at others. 

 

[The Kaeya Simp 13,990]

that love isn't the only thing that can keep a relationship

[Tom Gallagher 33,599]

To be myself. It’s harder than you think for me.

[Luna the Great of all the Russias 3,016]

A potential one is this:

Make the most of the relationships you have with people while they are still alive.

[Cash In 22,644]

That as much as we hate it, failure is important. Without failing, you can't learn or better yourself as a person. The harder you fail, the more you grow.

[ExplosionMare 18,093]

That I can’t be perfect for all my friends, I can only be the best I can be. 

[lomk 20,665]

As a victim of physical, mental, and emotional abuse throughout the entirety my childhood, it was incredibly hard to come to terms with a few things until it happened in therapy.

• No matter how perfect you are, abusers will still abuse you. Not because you aren't perfect (you aren't, and that's okay) but because you will never measure up to their cruel and impossible standards.
• Your love and trust are earned. Nobody is entitled to those things from you.
• Assertion is the most important skill you can practice when you're in your late teenage years. Anyone who calls it rebellion does not respect your ability to think for yourself. Someone who does not want you to think for yourself is not your friend.

Edited August 26, 2021 by lomk

[Dreambiscuit 10,310]

When I was very young I used to snoop into other peoples’ business, and one time I found out more than I wanted to know. So much so that it caused me extreme anxiety. I found out later that much of what I heard had been taken out of context so I was over-reacting, but that lesson was learned at great expense.

[Clawdeen 15,661]

On 2021-07-03 at 9:40 PM, Clawdeen said:

Be careful who you trust 

 

[Night Sky 344]

The hardest lesson I've ever had to learn was that my marriage was doomed to begin with. It has taken me 7 years to come to grips with it. That's the short version, there's a lot to unpack there, obviously. And obviously, we're not going to go into any of it. 

This has also involved some more specific hard lessons I've had to learn about myself. Some of them have been bitter pills to swallow indeed, but clearly they would be. It's more a matter of it being very hard to sort this all out and my probability of doing so was never high. And of course, I am still very much a work in progress.

Edited February 10 by Night Sky

[Treeglow Flicker 13,923]

That not everybody has a conscience or a sense of right and wrong. Also, not everybody can be reasoned with through civilized discussion.

[Sparklefan1234 173,734]

It's good to talk about your feelings when something is bothering you and your friends will be willing to listen and help you through it. 

[Iforgotmybrain 5,899]

You shouldn’t expect others to be responsible for your own personal wellbeing and happiness. It’s not fair to other people, and it’s ultimately going to lead to you being emotionally hurt in some way. Something something Evangelion quote the only person who can take of you, is you blah blah.

In that same vein, you can’t force someone to change, even if you give them all the support in the world. They have to actively want to change and grow as a person.

[Crypty Scribbles 5,452]

That real life doesn't fit laws of storytelling. Sometimes all the effort leads to nothing and there's no happy end.

Sounds silly, but yeah... the hardest lesson for me.

Edited March 10 by Crypty Scribbles

[Avvery 27]

That I could never and probably never fit in this civilization lifestyle. This may sounds crazy but I always believe that all my past life has just me being a soldier(don’t ask it’s just an core feeling that even I can’t explain) and so with my current life without serving just feel completely empty.

 

Edited March 10 by Avvery

[abronymouse 6,016]

some good lessons here. 

the last really tough time was back when I was a kid and there are

1) Be careful who you trust

2) If you hang on, life will get better

then there's all the tough lessons that I totally haven't learned  but those are the ones which stick in my mind

 

[Crypty Scribbles 5,452]

9 hours ago, Avvery said:

That I could never and probably never fit in this civilization lifestyle. This may sounds crazy but I always believe that all my past life has just me being a soldier(don’t ask it’s just an core feeling that even I can’t explain) and so with my current life without serving just feel completely empty.

Ow ow! I think I understand you. When I was kid I was good in analysing stuff and I was great to do things have been told. But I was bad in taking decisions, always doubting. Like a perfect sidekick or butler.

So I made up a trick.

First I was writing my plans or goals or detailed thoughts about any situation with several options in conclusion and was pretending that I was sending the papers to "the King". After that the trick was to pretend that I'm "the King" wearing a virtual crown. A person with a single function - to make a decision and give corresponding orders. I had to choose one of options to act. Then the King seals his order and sends it next. Third role of mine (let's call it "the soldier") should receive sealed orders and execute them without any doubt because mighty king and his adviser know the best.

Yeah, the role of the king was the hardest for me at the very beginning, but now it's natural. You can try this game too. I'll be happy if it will happen to be funny or helpful to you.

Cheers ^•^