Rainbow Dash and the Quest for the Diamond Unicorn

[Redthir 42]

Rainbow Dash and the Quest for the Diamond Unicorn

 

Rainbow Dash awoke from her midday nap, into a surfacing state of mind. She watched her stream of thoughts that one so often does when in semi-consciousness. It was one of the many midday naps she had undergone, and much needed it was too – she felt exhausted after all her work clearing clouds, although it was more her boss than the actual job itself that wore her out. Transporting and clearing clouds were no problem for her (if left to her own devices, she would clear the sky in an impressive ten seconds flat), but unfortunately her ideal methods were declared “unsafe” and apparently “breached the terms of her work contract.” On many occasions Rainbow Dash simply did her job as she pleased, but unfortunately she had a boss who seemed to have eyes everywhere. Trotinari was his name, and none could quite be sure what he got up to, but none who ended up in a position to speak to him ever dared ask him that. Not even Rainbow Dash, who self declared herself “one of the boldest Pegasi to have ever lived.” And when Rainbow Dash made a claim about her abilities or awesomeness, her claim was likely to be completely outlandish, but annoyingly also correct.

 

It is very easy to diverge, for this is merely the setting, and a narrator likes to cut the fat as quickly as possible, so that they can unveil a tasty joint of meat. And meat, horse meat to be exact was exactly what Rainbow Dash had on her mind. She was always sleeping around with a mare or a stallion (sometimes more than one in the same night), but not one of them could satisfy her desires. Others accused her of wild behaviour, but in Rainbow Dash’s eyes, this was an unfair and greatly over simplified accusation. She would never be tamed until she found the one pony that was truly right for her and Rainbow Dash believed she knew exactly who it was.

 

Rainbow Dash didn’t know her nearly as well as she should’ve done, considering that they were virtually always together. The five ponies Rainbow Dash was closest to were Applejack, a great friend who shared her love of physical activity. They’d always fight each other, race together and hurl their fair share of insults at one another. Then there was Fluttershy, a friend from fillyhood whom Rainbow Dash regarded as a true legend and deep down, just as badflank as Rainbow Dash herself. Pinkie Pie was crazy and unpredictable, excellent for last minute ideas of which Rainbow Dash saw no coherent pattern, which was perfect for two ponies who hated predictability. They were also both lovers of mischief. Twilight Sparkle was a mistress of magic, much as Rainbow Dash was a mistress of flight. They were both fond readers (although Twilight was considerably more diverse in her genres). In particular, Rainbow Dash enjoyed the Daring Do series. And then there was Rarity, whom she very rarely spent any time with.

 

For the reader who has no knowledge of Daring Do, she is a fictional adventurer. A seeker of ancient artefacts hidden deep within a jungle, these precious artefact once well guarded secrets, now they were legends fallen into the wrong hooves. The jungles of Coltombia were filled with gold, and ancient settlers had designed artefacts that were mighty beauties to behold. Many of them were master craftsponies, and it showed. “The Sapphire Stone was a beauty that was entirely blue, but contrasted two very sharp shades of blue. The stone itself was a metallic sky blue in colour and depicted an Ahuizotl, a ruthless and bloodthirsty animal with two heads, its vicious looking faces crafted to resemble most threatening facial expression, mouth open and its teeth scaled to perfection. The two faces looked at each other, making the statue entirely symmetrical. Towards the bottom rested the Sapphire stone, which was a deep dark blue that was much like the colour of Rarity’s eyes. Although these stories were fictional, they were based on legends, which Twilight Sparkle had confirmed to be true (and Twilight was never wrong on these matters).

 

Rainbow Dash was determined to have Rarity for herself. She believed that Rarity was the one who could satiate her. The mare was deeply passionate and it showed all too well in her sapphire-like eyes. She behaved like a fairytale princess, with her love of fashion and her constant dreams of meeting the perfect stallion. But she was hardly a fairytale princess. She was feisty and just as strong of will as she was of heart. She was not especially athletic, but she knew exactly what love was about. She was a deeply sensual individual. Deep down, both of them were just as wild as one another. Unlike her friends Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash also lacked imagination, meaning that the only way that she could experience Rarity’s skill was while they were together.

 

Rarity was a pony of class and sophistication. Rainbow Dash was charismatic, but for a pony like Rarity to succumb to Rainbow Dash the kind of charisma the latter possessed was not enough. Rarity had a natural shield towards seduction, her inter-ponial skills naturally top-notch. She knew exactly what a pony was feeling at one time and was rarely afraid to use it to her advantage.

 

Yet Rainbow Dash had devised a scheme. She had invited Rarity on a cave exploring holiday in the Coltombian jungles. And although Rarity despised getting dirty, she loved beauty. The jungles were famed for their vast quantities of gold. And greater still were the artefacts that lay inside the cavern. If Rainbow Dash could claim one of those (and she was determined to undertake the challenge), she may be able to have Rarity bow down to her will, through a combination of the bravery required to reach such trinkets and the fact that the Pegasus could offer such a grand trinket. Rarity was a pony of fine quality, and Rainbow Dash knew that the best ponies are not won over easily.

 

These paragraphs more or less sums up everything that was in Rainbow Dash’s thoughtstream. The free-spirited Pegasus was finally progressing towards full scale consciousness. It was time to wake up. She made a loud groan, flexing her hooves and her wings. It was now time to stand up. She had been napping on a cloud in the middle of nowhere, high above in the skies. But these clouds were exactly where Rainbow Dash wanted to be, as although she had a home, the clouds felt far more open. Nothing felt better to Rainbow Dash than freedom and wide open spaces. These brought her a feeling of power – for she could see for miles below, and the sky was quiet which meant that any noises could easily be heard, alerting her of unwanted presence. She felt completely secure and safe here. To look at Rainbow Dash, she was light blue in colour. Her mane and tail were rainbow-coloured, although on her mane it was the red, orange and yellow which were most prominent. These combined with her fiercely bright rose eyes gave her a very fiery, wild and even aggressive presence. She was very muscular as well, with distinctively powerful looking legs as a result, yet her overall presence was stocky rather than bulky. But stronger than her legs were her wings, which over the years had thickened – these clearly being the mark of a constantly exercising Pegasus. Her face typically bore a somewhat mischievous smile, one that allowed no pony to be entirely sure what she was thinking at any one time (apart from, as Sod’s law would have it, Rarity).

 

It was now time for her daily flight. Rainbow Dash strained the muscles on her flank to fart (as gas made her heavier and would limit her acceleration). She proudly released a loud noise and dived forward, headfirst into the surrounding sky, controlling herself with a fast yet powerful flapping of her wings. She continued these flapping motions, now kicking back her rear legs to generate speed. 1! 2! 1! 2! The rhythm continued, her legs kicking back with the power of bass drum beats, steadily speeding in their pace. Her wings became sharper in their movements, as she determinedly attempted to achieve the fastest speed she had ever soared at. She quickly spotted a less turbulent zone to her left, so she made a rapid glide over. Any loss of speed was impossible to notice, and it was very quickly regained as she continued accelerating towards maximum speed. It was an utter amazement to watch, as her mane and tail left a rainbow through the sky (and at the speeds in which she was flying, that was the only way in which to tell where she had been). After reaching a certain speed (which was nearly as fast as that of a bullet), the Pegasus angled her face and allowed herself to loop the loop, leaving a rainbow ring behind as she did so. This was exactly what life should be about – freedom, speed, adventure, adrenaline, being on the verge of danger and the feeling that you can do anything. The powerful winds bought a rush all over the Pegasus’ body.

It was time to proceed downwards, down towards the town of Ponyville. In much the same manner that one moves a steering wheel, she aggressively angled her face downwards to roughly fifty degrees. Down and down she travelled, slowing at the latest moment possible to avoid any unnecessary danger (although, seeing as this was Rainbow Dash, her definition of dangerous was… different). Nonetheless, she seemed to have perfected the art of late landings, with rapid kicks in her front hooves to slow down. She now hovered a metre above the ground, and gently dropped herself the last metre. She had some watchers from the ground as always, which she was only too proud of. There was Scootaloo, the young orange Pegasus with a purple mane and tail, who’d idolized her for a long time. Her sweet, yet enthusiastic shouts could be heard.

 

“Awesome flying as ever, Rainbow Dash! Will you be here again tomorrow?” Scootaloo asked with a high pitched shout of intense excitement, the kind that only fillies and colts would ever speak in.

 

“Same time tomorrow, Scoots. And I’ll be even more awesome than I was today.” Rainbow Dash spoke with a loud and boisterous voice, which had a certain raspiness that sounded like the result of shouting too much.

 

“Do you need to be somewhere?” Scootaloo asked, smiling nervously, realizing the question may have alienated the Pegasus.

 

“Unfortunately I do. But hay, I’ll be here again tomorrow and I’ll have more time then. See you around, little fella!” Rainbow Dash held a hoof out to Scootaloo, to which Scootaloo quickly high-hooved.

 

Rainbow Dash did have business to attend to. Ever since she’d convinced Rarity to join her on this expedition, Rarity had requested something called “a preparations meeting.” It didn’t interest the Pegasus one bit, but she needed to make Rarity feel at ease as much as possible.

 

Rainbow Dash, upon finally arriving at Rarity’s Carousel Boutique, gave an unusually polite knock.

 

“Come on in!” Rarity said in a somewhat musical voice, which sounded like it was taken straight from melodrama. Although then again, just about everything Rarity ever did sounded like it came from melodrama.

 

“Hay, Rarity!” The Pegasus bellowed, with her familiar raspy voice that would make one wonder what on Equestria did she sound like when she had a sore throat.

 

“Rainbow Dash, do not come into my Carousel Boutique with wet hooves!” Rarity replied, in a voice that sounded like the voice an upper class pony would use to indicate anger. In fact, it sounded much like Rainbow Dash’s normal voice, except with Rarity’s eloquence.

 

Rarity was a unicorn of class and sophistication, and it showed in her appearance. She was very well groomed, with her purple mane combed into a series of very thin wavy curls (and somehow, so was her tail, although one could never be sure as to how she’d pulled that off). She was white in her colour, a true “rarity” among ponies, but nonetheless widely regarded as one of the most beautiful colours there was. This white allowed her Cutie Mark, a trio of shining diamonds to radiate with power. But these three diamonds were not the most beautiful of the five gems the unicorn bore. The most beautiful gems she bore, at least in Rainbow Dash’s mind were the two sapphires she had for eyes. “Such a deep blue shade...” Rainbow Dash thought to herself. “Filled with power, and primal energy.” Rainbow Dash’s thoughts were ceased by the annoyed-sounding unicorn.

 

“Rainbow Dash, dry your hooves and stop showing me your flank!” Rarity’s voice now sounded as though she were telling off a badly behaved schoolkid.

 

Rainbow Dash couldn’t help laughing at Rarity’s response. The unicorn never quite seemed to be aware of the fact that ponies in Ponyville didn’t normally wear clothes. Ironically, this meant that despite her typically being the first among her friends to primly stick her nose up at a crude joke, she was often unintentionally the crudest among them, simply because she was the only one to ever pick up on it. Rainbow Dash dried her hooves on Rarity’s welcome mat, which seemed to be unusually posh and richly coloured for a welcome mat – but then again, this is Rarity we’re talking about.

 

“My welcome mat really needs changing. After all the wet and muddy hooves I have been made to deal with, it has become discoloured from dirt. Oh, of all the dreadful things that could happen, this is the WORST POSSIBLE THING!” Rarity’s voice turned from a rant, to full scale whining.

 

Rainbow Dash, much like anypony else, did not want to hear Rarity’s whining. It was very grating on the ears and brain. “So, you wanted me for some “preparations” meeting.” The Pegasus said in a somewhat rebellious sounding voice, much like that of a teenager attempting to sarcastically talk down to a figure of authority.

 

“Greetings, Rainbow Dash. Why, I did indeed. After all, we cannot possibly travel without equipment. I know that I need my extensive beauty supplies. I need protective equipment, like boots to stop my hooves getting dirty. We will need a shelter, someplace to stay the night. And what have you booked in regards to travel?” Rarity asked, sounding deadly serious and formal in everything she said.

 

“Travel? There’s a last minute flight that can get you there exactly as and when.” Rainbow Dash replied, sounding somewhat mischievous. Rarity raised her eyebrows in alarm, having quickly realized what the Pegasus was up to.

 

Rarity raised her voice in a sudden mixture of shock and fury. “In the name of Cloudsdale, you know how much I detest sport! The prospect of me tugging onto your hoof for dear life is not exhilarating one bit as it is downright scary. (At this point she raised her voice further still) Least of all with a pony like you, who holds no regards for precautionary safety measures!” Rarity’s voice was now one of flat-out anger.

 

As much as Rainbow Dash hated to admit it, Rarity was right. Rarity had always tried her best to be generous, and would never have dragged Rainbow Dash into anything she did not want to do. It was only right to treat a friend - especially such a great friend as Rarity, in a way she would never treat others. Secondly, Rarity could be killed if things went wrong. The thought of losing a friend through her own foolhardiness was unbearable. Rainbow Dash’s typical bravado almost completely departed her, as she said “I’m sorry, Rarity. You’re right. I’ll have a Friendship Express ticket ready in several minutes.”

 

The Pegasus flew out of the Carousel Boutique without waiting for a reply from Rarity, and dived straight towards Ponyville train station.

It was around three in the afternoon on a weekday, when most ponies were at work, so the queues for tickets were light. Walking up to a desk, Rainbow Dash gave out a “Hay!” that was ever so slightly quieter than her normal greeting.

 

She was talking to a grey, male unicorn. His fur was in a poor condition and his green eyes lacked depth. He looked very tired and bored. “May I help you?” He was trying his best to sound polite, on the simple basis that it was a requirement in his job. If Rainbow Dash didn’t have what she believed to be an important duty to fulfil, she would’ve sarcastically responded “No. You can’t help me with anything.” She resisted the urge and instead said, “Yes. I’m here because I need a ticket to Coltombia this Friday.” Her voice sounded blunt, but not threatening – at least if you knew her it didn’t. For a stranger, one couldn’t quite be sure. Regardless, it created a “don’t mess with me” tone that was exactly the feeling Rainbow Dash wanted to assert over another.

 

The stallion responded, stepping back slightly. “Coltombia? Friday? Morning or afternoon?” He seemed rather a stoic, speaking with seemingly programmed speech.

 

Rainbow Dash hesitated and closed herself by moving one of her hooves upon her chin and gently tapping the top of it. She wanted to be certain before making the decision, and this meant stepping into Rarity’s boots. For some, trying to imagine one’s thinking complex was as painful as the feeling in one’s gut after eating mouldy hay, but fortunately Rainbow Dash was not the type who would go into the extensive details of analyzing another individual’s mind inside out. Rainbow Dash made a slight giggle to herself as she imagined Twilight Sparkle in her situation making a very extensive decision-making process. For Rainbow Dash, however “What would Rarity want? She always talks about getting her beauty sleep. And she hates being rushed.” These factors pointed all too clearly towards the afternoon, so that would be the time. Rainbow Dash cleared her hoof from her chin, and rapid-fired “Afternoon!” upon the grey unicorn.

 

Trying his best to remain stoic towards the rather flamboyant Pegasus, the stallion quickly moved his face to the side, and tried his best to robotically return it to face Rainbow Dash once more. “Okay, we have a train at 13:37 and one at 15:37. Which one would you like?” All questions end on a rising tone, but he paused in the middle of a five word sentence, which made all of his speech seem un-natural.

 

It was bound to be a long journey. Rainbow Dash wanted some time to explore on the first day, and on that basis it was clear which one to go for. “13:37.” The stallion now spun around halfway, at a slow speed but void of even the slightest changes, until he stopped when he was exactly, or roughly one hundred and eighty degrees around. Judging by the robotic behaviour he displayed so well, chances were that he’d been made to practice this hundreds of times before actually doing his shift, until he was consistently turning exactly one hundred and eighty degrees. The extent to which a boss typically cared about propriety was hilarious, impressive and sad all at once.

 

After finding a ticket from someplace over the counter, the grey unicorn levitated the ticket over to Rainbow Dash. “There you go. Ticket for the 13:37 to Coltombia on Friday. That’ll be fifteen pieces. Is that all right? (Rainbow Dash handed them over) Bye bye.”

 

“HEY RAINBOW DASH!” It was a very loud, high-pitched and happy sounding voice that could only ever have been associated with one pony.

 

“Pinkie Pie? How did you find me?” Rainbow Dash said, slightly shocked. It wasn’t all that unusual being found by Pinkie Pie (who seemed to have a knack for knowing exactly where a pony was at any one time.), but she’d often find somepony when they least expected it.

 

“I followed your hoofmarks! The angle of the rainbow trail you left behind made it all too obvious where you’d landed!” (At this, Rainbow Dash began questioning more and more inside her head. She hadn’t left behind a rainbow trail for much of the landing stages, so for Pinkie Pie to have worked that one out it required an immense deal of intuition. And knowledge of the pony in question. How the hay did Pinkie Pie know THAT much about her friend? Then again, it wasn’t a smart move to ask Pinkie Pie questions, unless you were trying to melt your brain. Unfortunately, Pinkie Pie’s antics regularly made you want to ask questions of the most outlandish kind possible.) And then I followed your hoofmarks all the way here!” Pinkie Pie said, bouncing all around Rainbow Dash and consequently making the latter feel a tad uncomfortable.

 

“Not all that difficult, huh, Pinkie? I leave my mark everywhere I go!” Rainbow Dash said, boasting in the manner that only she could get away with.

 

“Your Cutie Mark? Don’t be silly Dashy, your Cutie Mark was nowhere to be seen! Or wait, I found it!” She tagged Rainbow Dash’s Cutie Mark, an extreme breach of anypony’s privacy, for it was located on her flank.

 

Rainbow Dash had “shown herself off” to many stallions and mares alike. This, however, was a bit more than the Pegasus felt comfortable with. “Ummm… Pinkie? Not here, please. For decency’s sake.” A horrible feeling crept up in her sixth sense that seemed to have momentarily paralyzed an area of her brain. She was sure she’d said the wrong thing (although, that was very easy to do when Pinkie was around. Pinkie Pie managed to make Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy believe that Rainbow Dash thought Fluttershy was a tree, as a result of misunderstanding Rainbow Dash’s sarcasm.)

 

Pinkie Pie stopped talking. For about half a second, she managed to completely stop moving, which she always did whenever she lost track of what she was talking about. The moment that half a second was over though, she’d come rattling at you with all guns blazing.

 

“What were we talking about again? Oh yeah, now I remember, there’s a party on tonight! One of my very own specialities in fact! There’ll be many guests, mares and stallions alike! AND MY NEW POTION IS THERE FOR EVERYPONY TO TRY! Hey Rainbow Dash! There’s a party on tonight! One of my”- Pinkie Pie appeared to be reciting exactly the same speech, word from word, twice. Regardless, Rainbow Dash was quick to raise a hoof against Pinkie’s mouth.

 

“Ya’ know Pinkie, for a pony who never forgets anything, you seem to forget a lot of things.”

 

Pinkie Pie appeared to completely ignore everything Rainbow Dash said, and instead replied: “So, Rainbow Dash, will you be at my party once more?”

 

As Pinkie Pie had grown older, she had begun to bring a new atmosphere to her parties. What was once a party fuelled by innocent laughter was now a party fuelled by competition, where dangerously daredevil antics (such as seeing who could take the hardest knock on the head, or seeing who was the most willing to expose oneself to a storm) would likely make you the party star. (And party star in this case meant you got the first choice on who to sleep with.) And with guests like Rainbow Dash, avoiding competition was like trying to avoid freezing in the icy north in that it was never going to happen. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie had always been by far the wildest within their circle of friends, and it had shown most as they’d grown, now that Rainbow Dash was the only one who fully enjoyed Pinkie Pie’s “new” partying methods. Pinkie Pie was always brewing strange potions, which the resident herbalist Zecora had deemed unsafe. Pinkie Pie made them anyway, and goodness knew what would befall a pony who drank too much of them (and there was no avoiding the potions at Pinkie Pie’s parties). Not even Pinkie Pie knew. Rainbow Dash, being naturally fuelled by danger was never likely to decline.

 

Yet, despite this, Rainbow Dash did have doubts. She certainly didn’t want to sleep with any more ponies than she already had done. It soon enough had become graining, almost routine-like. Stallions would try and satiate her, only to fail. Sure, some of them managed great feats of ferocity and stamina. But each time, Rainbow Dash found herself longing for more. She wanted passion. Intensive electrifying passion, with strong sensual pleasure. She wanted love. As exciting as Pinkie Pie’s potions were, they always weakened one’s senses in one way or another.

 

Pinkie Pie seemed to have read the expression on Rainbow Dash’s face quickly enough that it seemed to be before Rainbow Dash even realized how she felt herself. The latter looked grumpy, and bordering on depressed as her cheeks inflated, which made her face look far heavier than normal. Pinkie Pie looked as though she was about to cry. “I’m sorry, Pinkie Pie, but not this time I’m afraid. I don’t really have time to explain my reasons now, but I’ll explain things later. Will I find you in Sugarcube Corner?” Rainbow Dash could never hurt the pink pony-shaped sugarball’s feelings. Pinkie Pie trusted Rainbow Dash well enough to know that she would never, ever, refuse her company without a good reason. Rainbow Dash, in turn was fully aware that Pinkie Pie felt this way. Pinkie Pie seemed to cheer up very quickly indeed, as she blasted out non-sequiturs once more.

 

“Yes! I’m always in Sugarcube Corner! Apart from when I’m not in Sugarcube Corner, like that time I rode up to Cloudsdale in my last minute contraption! Oh, and that time I kept sneaking up on a disloyal Twilight! And many other times! I’m never in Sugarcube Corner!” Rainbow Dash believed that this meant yes, but she couldn’t entirely be sure.

 

“Don’t take it to heart Pinkie. My reasons have nothing to do with you.”

 

“Okey dokey lokey! See you later at Sugarcube Corner!” It was now apparent that Pinkie Pie could definitely be found in Sugarcube Corner later on in the day. Rainbow Dash, without any further delay, flew straight back to Rarity.