The Corrupted Wish Game

[HorsesandMOARGaloar 300]

Granted. Any electrical devices that you are currently using suddenly revive him, and cause him to shine so brightly, the whole room is set on fire. He then shoots up to the sky and becomes into a bright star. There, he sends a meteorite of a very rare space metal as a thank-you gift for making him a star pony again.

 

I wish I can capture him, and sell him to the Galactic Empire for experiments. I think I might be rich for the worth of a rare star pony!

Edited December 29, 2016 by HorsesandMOARGaloar

[Meson Bolt 2,648]

Granted, but it takes you several weeks to capture the star pony, and you get a musical note of your choice in return. Thanks for your services.

 

I wish for coffee.

[The_Gobo 36,257]

Granted, You get your coffee.
But it's made from some kind of poisonous bean.

I wish I was Zuul.

[Widdershins 9,959]

There is no Zuul. There is only DANNA!!

ALL IS DANNA!!

 

Ohmigursh! Who's a cute widdle sentient slimeball! Wiwwuh Gobbo-wobbo!  And yes, I did change my coloration just so I could gush over goo!

 

Hmmm...

  Wish I knew what being sane felt like!

[icyfire 433]

Wish granted! You are now "sane" though you have such a ridiculously mundane life and each day feels the exact same as the last. There is no diversity in it. Just you and your schedule. 

 

I wish I could fix my glasses. 

[Widdershins 9,959]

I'll do you one better! *Plarf*  Now you no longer need eyeglasses! ...Since I've removed your eyes!

 ...I dunno, suppose you find your way around by making high-pitched yelping noises. You're like an X-Man now!!

  And I...Am your tragic backstory!

 

 

Hmm...

Wish I didn't have to rhyme every time I sang. Wish I found some chords in an order that was new.

                                                                    My name is Fuzzyface aaaand I, care, what you think...

[HorsesandMOARGaloar 300]

Granted. Your singing is so horrible, it instead attracts a horde of mad, mad people.

 

I wish I can make this into an awesome music video!

[NullAccount 287]

Granted, but YouTube's algorithms cause no one to see it.

 

I wish that my wish doesn't get corrupted.

[HorsesandMOARGaloar 300]

Granted. Nothing happens, and not even your wish came true.

 

I wish I can buy one of Santa Claus' spare sleighs -- he's selling them on eBay.

[Widdershins 9,959]

Granted! Though it turns out there was a typo on the ad & it was supposed to be S-L-A-Y instead. You now have a B-movie slasher villain dressed up as Santa trying to get into your house!

 

  ...Yes, Santa slasher movies are a thing. Yes, they are all irredeemably terrible.

 

 

 

 

   I wish people would stop referring to the new Pokemon Sun and Moon generations as S&M. That... sorta means something different.

[HorsesandMOARGaloar 300]

Granted. Nintendo and M&M release a brand of chocolates themed after Sun and Moon. But most of the machines malfunction, causing them to melt on a sunny day.

 

I wish Sunny Flare would learn to use her wrist devices as her weapons.

[Soaring Symphony 372]

Granted, she gets blood thirsty and commits mass genocide.

 

I wish Yoshi was a Pokemon

[icyfire 433]

Granted! He is now a Pokémon, but since he is an invasive species, he slowly drives all other Pokémon to the verge of extinction.

 

I wish I could master watercolor art

[Widdershins 9,959]

*clack* Granted!

 Though you're painting with literal colored water now. So all that you paint just immediately seeps & drips off the canvas after you're done.

Then you slip in the puddle.

 Den you grumpy 'bout it for a bit!

 

 

I wish, I wish, upon a star to fly with dra-... wait, no I've done that one already...Hummm...

 

Shoot. Wish I had a better memory!

[icyfire 433]

Your wish has been granted! though you have such a good memory you lose sight of the present in the past. You re-live and analyze the same moments over and over again in a never ending loop.

 

I wish I could have a cup of hot tea right now.

Edited January 4, 2017 by icyfire888

[Widdershins 9,959]

   Sure thing!

*Pours it on your head*

Whelp, that sure was easy!  Eeh-hee!

 

Hee.... Sigh.

Wish I had somebeing to play games with.

....

Uhh, that didn't mind the occasional pouring of hot tea on their head.

[icyfire 433]

Granted! But now they pour tea on your head!! >w<

 

I wish I had a clean towel to dry the tea off my hair and head! 

[Widdershins 9,959]

*Clack*  *Poof*

There you go! Of course, the towel is also drenched in steaming hot tea!

...What? It's clean tea that's in that towel?!

 

 

I wish I knew when to stop! Eeh-hee-hah-horf!

[icyfire 433]

Congrats you now know when to stop...but also realize the pointlessness of much of our lives and begin to question if there is ever a reason to start in the first place...

Welp, that was depressing. I wish I could be less depressing

Edited January 4, 2017 by icyfire888

[Widdershins 9,959]

With less depression you gain a lack of capability to recognize the severity in extremes. Without an acknowledgement of suffering you lose the comparison to the highs of life and thereby lose your sense of humor. Since humor is based in suffering, you would then lose your positivity due to lack of negativity and become more depressed. The Cycle Begins Anew.

 

   The Nightmare Becomes Reality!

      Deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle-deedle!!!

 

Man, wish I had a list of every single possible reference I could make!

[HorsesandMOARGaloar 300]

Granted. They drive you insane.

 

I wish I can document insanity.

[Soaring Symphony 372]

Granted, you get thrown into Arkham Asylum and share a cell with the Joker.  Have fun.

 

I wish I never had to sleep but also didn't suffer the effects of sleep deprivation.

[The_Gobo 36,257]

Granted! You never have to sleep or feel sleep deprived!
Though now you never feel anything at all D:


I wish slimes were people.

o3o

[Widdershins 9,959]

   Well, they kind of pretty much already are. Like, eighty percent water, not to mention the various organs, bile systems livers... You ever debone a chicken carcass before? All them bits are just sloshing around untethered in there! Were it not for the bones we would be pretty much just living beanbag chairs! Yeesh, living is a horrible thing!

 

  I wish I had, like, a power button I could press so I could just immediately conk out at night when I need to go to sleep!

[The_Gobo 36,257]

Granted! You have an 'off' switch.
However, you have no means by which to turn back on without someone else to hit it, and still age and function normally otherwise.
Thus you could die from sleeping D:
 

I wish... hmmm....
I wish it was raining tacos o3o