Braeburn Rap Battle Lines - Good or No?

[Lunar Red 92]

I was writing a pony rap battle, for EPRBoM, it was Braeburn vs Soarin.

I happened to get 9 Lines done and wondering if they were good or not.

I also wrote Soarin lines but they are terrible

But anyways here is Braeburn's

Here you go:

 

Braeburn -

Oh, Howdy Partner!

You must be a sucker.

Try to rap againist me?

And you'll surely see.

That you should'nt rap against a stallion from APPLELOOSA!

You're stallion pegasi that gets a none of the mares.

Can't even follow up to any of your dares.

You'll be going back to mother crawling on your knees.

Cause this battle's already over and the winner is me.

 

Also if you can help with Braeburn's or Soarin's lines that would be nice .

Edited March 24, 2013 by RedtheSaint