Join My Evil Council and get free tacos!

[Virgil 685]

First, there are no tacos! See how diabolical I am? Tricking you into looking at this page with an empty promise, that all ready makes me as evil as a candidate running for congress! But moving on...

So I initially thought of joining up with these ponies:

 

But they weren't evil enough! So I'm starting my own "Evil Council", which will be called....

 

If interested please submit you resume below, and include one act of utter evil you have committed recently and one professional reference ( from someone certified as evil by a group of evil peers ). 

[M'aiq the Liar 5,804]

So, I heard mudkipz canz joins eivl?

[wowowowo 132]

once when I brushed my teeth I left the water running..... the full 2 minutes

[A Canadian Fritter 187]

I guess you can say *puts on aviators* the taco is a lie *YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!*

 

seriously though, on my birthday I told my friends that I didn't get goodie bags this year... then when they left I pulled out the box of goodie bags and ate all the candy myself

[Virgil 685]

 

 

So, I heard mudkipz canz joins eivl?

 

 

Excellent your internet meme trolling powers will prove very useful.

once when I brushed my teeth I left the water running..... the full 2 minutes

 

You fiend! You will be in charge of evil environmental schemes.

I guess you can say *puts on aviators* the taco is a lie *YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!*

 

seriously though, on my birthday I told my friends that I didn't get goodie bags this year... then when they left I pulled out the box of goodie bags and ate all the candy myself

You will serve the council well this coming Halloween with our "stealing candy from infants" operation.

[A Canadian Fritter 187]

i also have text editing skills that may come in handy. why, look at this screenshot i just took:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

okay it doesn't exactly want to show right now but I changed this thread's title to: join mah evul cownsul end geht free takoz

don't worry i'll change it back

[Virgil 685]

i also have text editing skills that may come in handy. why, look at this screenshot i just took:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

okay it doesn't exactly want to show right now but I changed this thread's title to: join mah evul cownsul end geht free takoz

don't worry i'll change it back

Whilst I don't like the idea of having my thread temporarily out of my absolute control, I do admire your initiative and skills. Therefore you are in; now go and change shipping thread titles to lol cat references .

[Omega Centauri 317]

I am interested in joining EFIM

 

My history of evil acts includes:

 

Profanity

Downloading music and old movies from the internet

Frequent visits to questionable websites

Having unpopular opinions

Lying to get out of school

Leaving empty food boxes lying around/in the pantry

Insensitivity

Making offensive jokes

Not flushing a public toilet after thorough use

Flipping people off

Driving aggressively

General degeneracy

General acts of douchebaggery

 

All within the past month

 

 

My skills include:

 

Video editing

Photoshop

Making loud, extremely annoying noises with nothing but my own vocal cords

Playing evil music on my guitar, or making annoying noises with it, whatever the situation calls for

General PC skills

Ruthless spamming

Using forced and/or outdated memes

Basic acting skills

 

And other general skills

 

 

Do I qualify?

Edited October 28, 2014 by Omega Centauri

[Virgil 685]

 

 

Downloading music and old movies from the internet

Did any of these movies have such masters of evil as Vincent Price, Peter Cushing, Boris Karloff, or someone else of their caliber?

[Omega Centauri 317]

Did any of these movies have such masters of evil as Vincent Price, Peter Cushing, Boris Karloff, or someone else of their caliber?

Well, one of them did have freddy krueger in it.

 

For the most part it's music, a variety of death metal, black metal, and other extreme forms of music.

[Virgil 685]

Well, one of them did have freddy krueger in it.

 

For the most part it's music, a variety of death metal, black metal, and other extreme forms of music.

Well, alright. You are in, but if you wish to progress down the path of villainy you should learn from the masters; just look how evil Price looks just in a photo!

He practically invented the evil smile!

[Concerto Dusk 240]

I payed twenty dollars for lunch.......... in pennies only. Is that evil enough for you?

[Virgil 685]

@, You diabolical fiend! Come and have the seat on my right, I shall call you number 2!

[Snow Frostflame 3,568]

I'm a mercenary so I go with the side that pays more bits

 

as for the most evil I have done back a long while ago on Minecraft 360 edition there was an option to make your game public I would join peoples worlds turn my gamertag off and burn there houses

[Virgil 685]

 

 

I'm a mercenary so I go with the side that pays more bits

We can pay you evil internet hugs at the moment at the moment but after my evil 5 year plan is finished we should be able to pay you in Sealand Dollars. That's right.. I plan on conquering the Principality of Sealand within 5 years!

( this place )

 

[The Crimson Cross 7,532]

Just you wait until you see my super evil headquarters and henchman.

 

WARNING!

Do not open the spoiler unless you can stomach extreme evil. I'm serious. Beware.

 

 

 

 

 

Is this to your liking, your fiendishness?

[Concerto Dusk 240]

I shall get an eyepatch immediately.

[Virgil 685]

 

 

Is this to your liking, your fiendishness?

Like it? It is absolutely

come and sit at my left!

[Omega Centauri 317]

Well, alright. You are in, but if you wish to progress down the path of villainy you should learn from the masters; just look how evil Price looks just in a photo!

He practically invented the evil smile!

What? all those other horrible things I did don't count for anything?

[Virgil 685]

 

 

What? all those other horrible things I did don't count for anything?

I wouldn't say that, but the path of villainy requires a certain sense of Aesthetics. One must learn to combine the destructive power of a predator, the beauty of an artist, and have a bit of delightful madness; if one wishes to achieve master level evil.

[Omega Centauri 317]

I wouldn't say that, but the path of villainy requires a certain sense of Aesthetics. One must learn to combine the destructive power of a predator, the beauty of an artist, and have a bit of delightful madness; if one wishes to achieve master level evil.

I can be pretty damn destructive when I want to, I AM an artist, musical artist that is, and sane is one of the last words most people would use to describe me.

[Virgil 685]

But I think this current number will suffice for our evil plans... although other than what the end result of my 5 year plan is, I don't have a plan... but we need something so evil that when asked our henchmen will respond like this :

 

Any suggestions?

 

 

I can be pretty damn destructive when I want to, I AM an artist, musical artist that is, and sane is one of the last words most people would use to describe me.

Alright, you have made your case.... I know! All evil groups need someone to play in a fashion most sinister on an organ, it's like on page three of the Official Villain Handbook or something , that shall be your assignment.

[Omega Centauri 317]

Alright, you have made your case.... I know! All evil groups need someone to play in a fashion most sinister on an organ, it's like on page three of the Official Villain Handbook or something , that shall be your assignment.

 

Well, I play guitar, not organ.

 

I could easily do something like this, it's pretty evil-sounding.

 

 

But, if you insist, I guess I could start learning the organ

[Virgil 685]

@@Omega Centauri, Yeah I found that page covering evil instruments in the handbook. The order goes something like this:

1. Organs

2. Japanese Flutes

3. Guitar

4. Xylophone

5. kazoo ( I was surprised about that one too )

[Shenron00 366]

I'd like to join!

-I have a dark humor, and I hate light.

-I found a bunny in Skyrim. Then I killed it!

-I gave my Minecraft friend a treasure chest. A treasure chest trap!

- I farted and didn't say "excuse me".

- I also committed the most diabolical thing ever: I made pancakes, and didn't put butter OR syrup on the table! The pancakes also had RAISINS!

 

As for my references.

First, Dr. Evil: "Thanks to him, we were able to design a giant "laser cannon" to destroy the moon! I call it the "Eclipse Cannon".

 

Next, Kid Buu: "GAHAHAHAHA! GRR AH HOHOHOHO! (Sorry, it doesn't really translate, but I bet he said "Shenron00 is a remarkable villain, and I highly recommend him to your team.")

 

Discord: "Oh, we used to have so much fun causing delectable chaos everywhere we went! Unfortunately, I'm not into the whole "evil" thing anymore."

 

Now for the most evil being of all, Palutena, who I totally didn't trick into thinking I was joining the Justice League!

Palutena: I can hear you you know...

Me: Uh oh....