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How to talk to women?


I_wesley125

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And what about friend zone?

Oh, this tickles my funny bone.

 

It annoys woman when you try to treat them much different.

 

Treat them like a friend, and they will treat you like a friend back.

 

And if it grows to something more, treat them nice, and they will treat you nice back.

 

And what about the friend zone?

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How about thinking the women as people instead of some mystical thing that you want something from? Just saying; Talking to people isn't hard, but if you fear something like talking to women, eventually you end up hating women as you begin to see them as some sort of enemy for causing such negative emotions in you.

 

It's foolish to fear some rejection from someone so much that it incapacitates you to begin with. Such an emotional baggage is how park bush-rapists are made. Perhaps finding a therapist and issuing your problems with some professional guidance is in place before they get out of hand. If all you think is that you're afraid of blowing your chances to get in her pants or into relationship with her of course you are going to freeze up since you can't think of anything intelligent to say while worrying over your own penis.

 

Treat women as people and you are already ten steps ahead of most idiots of your gender in your social abilities.

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Here are some things I can think off the top of my head,

 

For approaching women:

1.Compliment them,

but when it comes to compliments, don't just say "you're sexy" say something like "I hope you don't mind me saying hello, but I couldn't help but to notice you're the most beautiful women (insert place here)".

girls love being told they are pretty, but love even more being told they are prettier then other girls

 

2. If the girl has a unique, style, hair colour or clothing style. Compliment it, "I love how you rock that purple hair, I've never seen anyone pull it off like you have"

 

3. Smile and laugh, makes us feel more comfortable and at ease, seriousness has its time and place but not now.

 

4. Is she wearing a band-tee or something that shows an interest of hers? "Hey, I love metallica too, what's your favourite song by them? Mines blah blah blah blah"

 

5. Confidence is sexy, but don't panic if you get a little nervous either, it can be seen as cute, "sorry I'm a littler nervous, I'm not use to talking to a girl as beautiful as you :)"

 

The conversation

1. Find a common interest

once you find somehting you both like, go on and on about it, MAKE SURE YOU LET HERE TALK AND ASK HER QUESTIONS, girls love to talk about themselves.

2. Listen! "I've always wanted a pet cat" "Oh me too, cats are adorable, I had one when I was little and he did this really cute thing where..."

3. Don't let the conversation die, keep her interest. Find a subject she is passionate about and let her talk about it.

4. Don't talk for too long (as for first encounters the conversation can get boring)

leave after an engaging conversation "well, I better get back to my friends.."

5. End with a compliment about her personality

"It was such a pleasure to talk to such an intelligent women such as yourself" "how do you not have a boyfriend? You could be a comedian, you're so funny" *smile*

6. Get her number or add her on facebook, "if you ever want to talk again, or maybe meet up for so coffee, her's my number"

 

hope this helps :)

and most importantly, don't hide who you are,

be your funny, sweet, charming, adorkable self :) ~

 

This is good advice. If you can, I'd see what kind of personality type she is, such as outgoing, shy, reserved, and use that to help you. I know if any human approaches me I go into "stranger danger!!" mode and freak out, but that's probably because I'm prone to be anxious. I wouldn't be too forward with a shier person but instead try to be more friendly. If someone comes up and compliments me about my shirt, I don't feel so freaked (and I don't feel as if they're trying to get somewhere fast with me) out and it's a great starting point. After you say you like the ______ she is wearing, you can establish a common interest from there and then compliment her on how she looks or something along those lines so she knows that you possibly want to be more than friends.

I'd also try to go for someone you could be friends with because it will be much easier to establish something in common, and if the initial flirting does make any romantic chemistry happen, at least you will have a possible friend or more connections to other girls.

My best advice would be to not put any pressure on yourself and just be yourself. And maybe practice just talking with some women folk whilst you're out and about. Such as, 'do you think it will snow any more this year?'. It might help to calm your nerves knowing that you can talk to women and they won't murder you or run away :D

But remember to be yourself!

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I don't talk to girls unless they are already my friends...

I'm kinda a loser that way :P

But once they are my friends, talking comes natural. We say whatever we want together, enjoy clashing opinions, and forever being trapped in the friend zone. It's grand.

 

See, but the tricky part is making the girl I like best my friend so I can talk to them.

My first step is becoming friends with THEIR friends. If I mess up, the worst that could happen is some gossip that may or may not make it's way to the girl I want most.

Next step, sit with the girl I just recently became friends at lunch. Chances are, the girl I want most will sit there too (if not, I go become friends with whoever she sits with too...Sooner or later you'll be buds with everyone! It's awesome!)

Eventually I end up sitting with the girl I wanted as a friend, and become friends with her. With all her friends friends with me, it makes things fairly easy.

 

Now, don't think of this as a "using her friends to get close to her?!?!? YOU SICKO!" Think of it more as "getting social."

Chances are, in real life, your friends have friends that are friends with you. Why should her friends be any different?

Her friends are more like those you really just want to keep in the 'friend zone.' And nothing more. Just be careful not to enchant them with your natural charm; that's when it gets messy.

 

Good luck. And if you pee your pants, make it look like you just spilled your waterbottle on yourself.

of course she'll say it was 'pee' or something, making it a great conversation starter, but the point of it is to make it LOOK like you really did just spill your waterbottle, and to have her think it was your watterbottle. If she jokes with you about you 'wetting yourself' then you know you have a shot.

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I've never had a problem meeting or talking to women and getting to know them. My problem has always been trying to start a more romantic relationship, I always take it too fast or too slow :( 

 

As such, I have tons of girls friends, but have only had one girlfriend (who also friendzoned me not long after.)

 

 

Also, here's one of the best explanations of the friend zone I've seen:

Posted Image

 

The worst part about it is watching her get treated like shit by whatever asshole she is dating. And then she calls up and cries to you over the phone about how you're such a good friend.

 

 

 

So, ladies, do you see the world as divided into "nice guys" and "guys you can date"? Because it sure as hell seems that way. 

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How about thinking the women as people instead of some mystical thing that you want something from? Just saying; Talking to people isn't hard, but if you fear something like talking to women, eventually you end up hating women as you begin to see them as some sort of enemy for causing such negative emotions in you.

 

It's foolish to fear some rejection from someone so much that it incapacitates you to begin with. Such an emotional baggage is how park bush-rapists are made. Perhaps finding a therapist and issuing your problems with some professional guidance is in place before they get out of hand. If all you think is that you're afraid of blowing your chances to get in her pants or into relationship with her of course you are going to freeze up since you can't think of anything intelligent to say while worrying over your own penis.

 

Treat women as people and you are already ten steps ahead of most idiots of your gender in your social abilities.

 

We share the same view Pencils. Thanks.

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I can thank my autism for putting me in my socially terrible place I'm in now. I know I'm supposed to treat them like I treat my friends, but it's impossible. I can't even treat my friends who are girls like that, even if I don't want to date them. :(


Formally known as Misselaineous97.

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Shanky's got the best advice and I'll echo her statement.

 

But.....let's have some fun. Who wants to see me open a can of worms? Okay.

 

Ladder Theory. http://www.laddertheory.com/

 

Not saying I agree with it or advocate it, but it stirs up a ton of debate at least among my friends.

 

Basically, men and women have their own ladder of how they rate the opposite sex. Men's ladders are just 1 ladder and they rank women based on how much they want to have sex with them down to just being friends. A woman's position on a man's ladder can move at any time.

 

Women have 2 ladders, one for how much they want to have sex with a guy and one for just being good friends with a guy. All new men a woman meets are ranked through the sex ladder first. At any time, the guy can be moved over to the friends-only ladder AND cannot be returned back to the sex ladder ever (or in very rare cases). Once on the friends-only ladder, then a guy can be moved up or down.

 

That's the basic gist of it. Maybe it warrants its own topic if people want to discuss/agree/dispute it.

 

And guys, don't be like this dude

 

Posted Image

 

Edited by Doctor XFizzle
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It is actually easy. Nervous energy can be used towards and advantage.

 

It's not so much nervousness. I'm just too shy around others. Not just girls.

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This is good advice. If you can, I'd see what kind of personality type she is, such as outgoing, shy, reserved, and use that to help you. I know if any human approaches me I go into "stranger danger!!" mode and freak out, but that's probably because I'm prone to be anxious. I wouldn't be too forward with a shier person but instead try to be more friendly. If someone comes up and compliments me about my shirt, I don't feel so freaked (and I don't feel as if they're trying to get somewhere fast with me) out and it's a great starting point. After you say you like the ______ she is wearing, you can establish a common interest from there and then compliment her on how she looks or something along those lines so she knows that you possibly want to be more than friends.

I'd also try to go for someone you could be friends with because it will be much easier to establish something in common, and if the initial flirting does make any romantic chemistry happen, at least you will have a possible friend or more connections to other girls.

My best advice would be to not put any pressure on yourself and just be yourself. And maybe practice just talking with some women folk whilst you're out and about. Such as, 'do you think it will snow any more this year?'. It might help to calm your nerves knowing that you can talk to women and they won't murder you or run away :D

But remember to be yourself!

 

Well, you don't know a girl's personality when you first see her. It's initial attraction that brings you over, this is written for first time meeting and conversations. If it's meant to be, it will come fairly easy after that. Next, this is written for adults by adults. It said women. 'Stranger danger' isn't really thing when a young man talk to you in a bar full of people. and yes, you may strike out. but cut your losses and move on, wasting time on a girl that 'friendzones you' or is not interest is just a waste of time. Because truth is, there is a girl that wants to relationshipzone you, go out and meet her ~.

 

Oh, this tickles my funny bone.

It annoys woman when you try to treat them much different.

Treat them like a friend, and they will treat you like a friend back.

And if it grows to something more, treat them nice, and they will treat you nice back.

 

Since this is about women, and not children-teens

I would advise against this!

If a guy doesn't show an initial interest in me, he'll get freindzoned forever.

Girls are not mind-readers , no matter 'how obvious' you make it. ~

 

Now that I've doled out my bad advice quota, I should try to be at least a little helpful.

Just be yourself, for one. Secondly, don't throw complements their way every thirty seconds, girls know when you're trying too hard. A lot of Shank's points on conversation starters are valid here, and those should break the ice enough for spontaneity to keep the conversation going.

 

This was just for an original meeting, and you want to have a conversation not just constantly compliment. However, not complimenting the girl can make her feel insecure, and it allows lets her know you're interested in her. Studies show a girl decides if she likes a guy within the first 7 seconds of meeting. So let her know you're interested. A guy that can have and keep a conversation going (an interesting one) nothing is sexier. And the main reason why I date my boyfriend, because that trait is hard to find. ~

 

I don't think that's necessarily true...a shy person can't just avoid being shy.

 

true shyness doesn't exist,

all it is, is a lack of confidence. ~

I use to b so shy, I would cry when buying something at the store,

they I got confidence. ~

Edited by Shankveld
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Shyness can easily be avoided.

 

Self confidance is a thing that can be gained.

 

As RainbowDash said, it's not always so simple, but it can be overcome in most if not all cases.

I'd like to thank the MLP Vector Club for the images used in my avatar.

Known as "Princess Mi Amore Cadenza", "Trixie the Great", "Tom" and "Tomzoid the EggDroid".

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true shyness doesn't exist,

all it is, is a lack of confidence. ~

I use to b so shy, I would cry when buying something at the store,

they I got confidence. ~

 

Any advice on how I could gain confidence? Because it's really difficult for me and I would really like to be more confident in myself.


gc21Knt.png

 

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Any advice on how I could gain confidence? Because it's really difficult for me and I would really like to be more confident in myself.

 

Loving yourself is a big part of it.

I use to not take care of myself, as well as I do today.

When I started showering regularly, wearing make-up, doing my hair.

Little things that improve hygiene and appearance,

it made me feel better.

And as bad as this sounds, people will treat you better too.

Try working on things about you that you don't like. ~

It's not changing, it's growing :)

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I'm really awkward around guys but just be nice to us and don't be rude/mean and don't say anything insulting. I've had a lot of guys in the past say some really *ahem* mean things to me and it's NOT fun. Just be yourself and don't over think it!

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Also, this.

 

http-~~-//www.youtube.com/watch?v=HeHUQAnzpF0

And guys, don't be like this dude

 

Posted Image

 

 

Wow I feel horrible for laughing hysterically at this stuff.

 

But anyway, holy cow I never knew it was this complicated. I always just... ya know, said 'hi' and talked. I didn't know there were studies, and tactics, and theories, and all this stuff. And friend zones, I have never heard of these till this thread. And when they were first mentioned, I just assumed they were, ya know, something on facebook or something.

 

What's next, collage essays on how to obtain the optimal table in a Restaurant?

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