Is It A Waste Of Money If...

[Moonlight 7,290]

I don't believe it's a waste of money. It's your money, do what you want with it. Plus, it's Death the Kid, and that's extremely awesome, in my opinion. 

[*Rarity 123]

Parents may be in charge but they have no right at all to control what is mine. I earned the money, who says my parents have the right to control what I buy with it?

Even if you earned the money yourself and by legal rights you have the right to use them for whatever you want, it would be unwise of you to spend it on someting they forbid you to spend on. It will only cause troubles, major troubles.... Uh... I'm suspecting you already made up your mind on the question when you made the thread, you only seek the confirmation of other people to justify your actions.

 

It might not be "completley fair" of them to forbid you or whatever, and yes, go ahead and spend it on a cosplay, but don't come crying when you get major troubles with your mother... I would suggest just wait, move from home, do whatever you want. Or you could do as you planned, spend the money, argue with your mother, argue some more... Arguing is no good.

[. eris . 1,661]

I hate to come in here and sound like the total mom, but you are seventeen. Technically not a legal adult, unless you get yourself emancipated. And all the things that you "own" aren't even really yours--most parents buy their kids a laptop, a TV, a bed, food, clothes, etc. While I'm not going to go out and say "Don't be ridiculous! Your parents love you!" because frankly I don't know your situation, I do think that you need to respect your parent's wishes.

 

I don't believe it's a waste of money, I've been saving up for a cosplay for a while now, because it looks extremely awesome and I want it. But I'm also in college and while not technically living on my own, I take care of my parents and they consider me an adult. (Mostly--they still freak out if I talk about a guy. X_X) And besides, what would I even do with a cosplay? I would wear it once, maybe twice, to a convention or to geek out my friends at college. But then what? It would hang in my closet along with all the other dresses I don't like to wear.

 

Here's the thing: parents will treat you like an adult when you start acting like one. When I stopped throwing temper tantrums when I didn't get something I wanted, and instead put aside my anger so we could have a conversation, then things got better. And you know what? The things I begged my parents for when I was seventeen seem pretty stupid now. 

 

I do get the feeling that you've already made up your mind, and anything I say or anyone else says won't change it. You're probably just coming to us for justification, am I right? 

Edited December 6, 2013 by Miss Earl Grey

[Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936]

Even if you earned the money yourself and by legal rights you have the right to use them for whatever you want, it would be unwise of you to spend it on someting they forbid you to spend on. It will only cause troubles, major troubles.... Uh... I'm suspecting you already made up your mind on the question when you made the thread, you only seek the confirmation of other people to justify your actions.

 

It might not be "completley fair" of them to forbid you or whatever, and yes, go ahead and spend it on a cosplay, but don't come crying when you get major troubles with your mother... I would suggest just wait, move from home, do whatever you want. Or you could do as you planned, spend the money, argue with your mother, argue some more... Arguing is no good.

"don't come crying" I'm sorry, what do you actually take me for? I shall not let this woman act in whatever way she deems right towards me. I am a mentally ill teenager with a psychotic side, she'll leave me alone if she knows what is good for her. She is one of the main reasons as to why I am the way I am.

 

She is being stubborn thinking she is making some valid point as to it being a waste of money.  Well maybe it is to her, but to me it isn't. I'll let her know my point of view, hopefully she'll cave one day. If not, I will go ahead and buy it. Trust me nothing too terrible will come out of this, maybe an argument or two, but that's about it.

[. eris . 1,661]

"don't come crying" I'm sorry, what do you actually take me for? I shall not let this woman act in whatever way she deems right towards me. I am a mentally ill teenager with a psychotic side, she'll leave me alone if she knows what is good for her. She is one of the main reasons as to why I am the way I am.

 

Whoah, wait, wow. 

 

Please be careful. And don't hurt your mother over a cosplay. 

[Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936]

I hate to come in here and sound like the total mom, but you are seventeen. Technically not a legal adult, unless you get yourself emancipated. And all the things that you "own" aren't even really yours--most parents buy their kids a laptop, a TV, a bed, food, clothes, etc. While I'm not going to go out and say "Don't be ridiculous! Your parents love you!" because frankly I don't know your situation, I do think that you need to respect your parent's wishes.

 

I don't believe it's a waste of money, I've been saving up for a cosplay for a while now, because it looks extremely awesome and I want it. But I'm also in college and while not technically living on my own, I take care of my parents and they consider me an adult. (Mostly--they still freak out if I talk about a guy. X_X) And besides, what would I even do with a cosplay? I would wear it once, maybe twice, to a convention or to geek out my friends at college. But then what? It would hang in my closet along with all the other dresses I don't like to wear.

 

Here's the thing: parents will treat you like an adult when you start acting like one. When I stopped throwing temper tantrums when I didn't get something I wanted, and instead put aside my anger so we could have a conversation, then things got better. And you know what? The things I begged my parents for when I was seventeen seem pretty stupid now. 

 

I do get the feeling that you've already made up your mind, and anything I say or anyone else says won't change it. You're probably just coming to us for justification, am I right? 

So wait, the money I earned is theirs? Okay so how does that work? They are allowed to control the money I earned... In fact most of my stuff I earned the money myself to buy, do they own that too? Wow, if that's true we live in a fucked up world.

Whoah, wait, wow. 

 

Please be careful. And don't hurt your mother over a cosplay. 

This goes much deeper than a cosplay, sorry for not making this obvious.

[Neon Fire 473]

No, it is not a waste of money.  My mom was the same way, although I did get it.  She kept saying how it seemed like a waste of money, but whatever, I didn't care.  I at least have my own visa card now so I can buy stuff without her permission.

[Princess Lona 382]

Legal age is a really silly concept. People can be responsible or irresponsible at any age. People can be respectful or disrespectful at any age. As long as you're not hurting anyone else, live the way you want to live. If you feel in your heart that you are ready to make your own choices, then you should start making your own choices. If you feel your mother is being unfair, do argue with her, but do it using logic and reasoning instead of a screaming match (which is what some people automatically picture when they think of a teenager fighting with their parents for some reason). No matter how mad she makes you, keep a cool head as this will put you in the more powerful position and make her understand that you truly are the responsible person you claim to be.

[*Rarity 123]

"don't come crying" I'm sorry, what do you actually take me for? I shall not let this woman act in whatever way she deems right towards me. I am a mentally ill teenager with a psychotic side, she'll leave me alone if she knows what is good for her. She is one of the main reasons as to why I am the way I am.

 

She is being stubborn thinking she is making some valid point as to it being a waste of money.  Well maybe it is to her, but to me it isn't. I'll let her know my point of view, hopefully she'll cave one day. If not, I will go ahead and buy it. Trust me nothing too terrible will come out of this, maybe an argument or two, but that's about it.

"this woman" happens to be your mother... Jeez you really have no respect whatsoever for the woman who happen to be your mother...

 

As I said earlier, you already made up your mind, and this thread is completely useless.

 

Nothing good will come out of this... I'm sure... It doesn't matter if you're mentally ill, it looks like you're just trying to use that as an excuse or reason for your actions. Which is a very silly thing to do.

 

A cosplay or your mother? Cosplay goes first? How much fun will you have out of that? maybe a days worth of fun. Your mother will be with you for many years to come... Maybe just "this thing" won't be such a big deal, but the way you're talking sounds like you are plotting to do more than just this against your mother... I know nothing about you, and you know nothing about me, but I must say that this is not looking good at all for you...... I see no good things happening out of this.

[Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936]

"this woman" happens to be your mother... Jeez you really have no respect whatsoever for the woman who happen to be your mother...

 

As I said earlier, you already made up your mind, and this thread is completely useless.

 

Nothing good will come out of this... I'm sure... It doesn't matter if you're mentally ill, it looks like you're just trying to use that as an excuse or reason for your actions. Which is a very silly thing to do.

 

A cosplay or your mother? Cosplay goes first? How much fun will you have out of that? maybe a days worth of fun. Your mother will be with you for many years to come... Maybe just "this thing" won't be such a big deal, but the way you're talking sounds like you are plotting to do more than just this against your mother... I know nothing about you, and you know nothing about me, but I must say that this is not looking good at all for you...... I see no good things happening out of this.

Okay, I don't respect her for the reason that she has caused me so much depression.

 

I haven't said anything about using mental illness as an excuse for anything, when I said she'll leave me alone if she knows whats good for her, I meant it as she better not try anything with me.... as she has done so in the past, such as black mail or whatever. She may be my mother but it doesn't give her the right to take away my freedom, and let my siblings run free.

 

This was about her trying to control me without giving a rational answer, except her alone thinks it's useless to buy something that makes me happy. Maybe I came about saying this all in the wrong way, but really the worst that'll come between my mother and I is an argument or two.

[Commander Tangent 861]

My parents did this same thing when I tried to go to Gen-Con as Solid Snake. I eventually just told them I was going to buy it and went out and got it. While they dissaproved of it, I still went to Gen-Con and had a blast. If I were you I would buy it and have fun with it.

[Mlpfan185 1,763]

Something was here. Something was here. Something was here. 

Edited October 10, 2018 by NONAME

[Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936]

This is a multi-faceted problem, and I do not know you, nor do I know your mother. I am not a parent.

 

This all being said, a parent's job is to train you for the real world. They take all their hard-learned life lessons, and try to distill it into a medicine, an immunization if you will. This medicine doesn't taste good.

 

I know, at 17, this kind of thing can be frustrating to the point of rage. There are many nights I wish, I could go back to my 17 year old self, and warn him. Tell him that life was nothing depicted in economy, history, or gym class. That, in fact, every single lecture was experience, not hate and denial, coming from my parents and elders.

 

I don't believe in the 'respect your elders' crap. Some don't deserve it. Your mom however, sounds like she is trying to give you some of that nasty aforementioned medicine. If I were you, I would just roll with it.

The thing is though, I just have no understanding as to why she acts like this. I saved up this money exactly to buy this cosplay, and I earned the money doing various jobs for people and such... but she decides it's a waste of money, and refuses to let me use my own funds to pay for it. I dunno, it just confuses me greatly.

[Mlpfan185 1,763]

Something was here. Something was here. Something was here. 

Edited October 10, 2018 by NONAME

[Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936]

I feel your frustration, and believe me when I say, you will feel it all over again when you are trying to decide whether you can stave off rent for 12 more days, because you didn't eat for the last three.

 

However, that being all good, life is also about being fun. Have you tried to work out a compromise? Parents love that. Again, I am not sure of all the details.

 

I will say this though, if you want free money later. Put as much money as you can into a high interest yielding account. Then you can have much more of what you want later.

(I am not a financial adviser, nor do I possess the qualifications to attend to your money, just some helpful advice.)

Oh I have plenty in the bank... I am set for my own home and probably a car already and I'm 17. Though I can't touch it till i'm 21. Any 'pocket money' I get now is of little importance to me :I Anyways, I'll talk over this whole issue with my Dad and Mum at a later date, maybe after they've had a glass of wine or two xD

[GONEFOREVER 518]

If it makes you happy, you should do it, but don't go crazy and spend 500 dollars on it.

[Nerdy Luigi 2,065]

My answer: no.

The value of the cosplay is what you think it's worth. I would think it's not all that worth it, I can already pull off a Big Mac (Equestria Girls) cosplay myself.

[ShadowRose2k 271]

 

 

"don't come crying" I'm sorry, what do you actually take me for? I shall not let this woman act in whatever way she deems right towards me. I am a mentally ill teenager with a psychotic side, she'll leave me alone if she knows what is good for her. She is one of the main reasons as to why I am the way I am.

 

I'm gonna get backlash from this but I feel this needs the observations of a parent.  I have read the 2 pages here and probly this statement stands out the most to me.   A teenager upset because she is not getting her way.   Like it or not, your parents have the final say untill  you are of legal age and not living under their roof.   Possibly even more so, as you describe your self as a "mentally ill teenager with a psychotic side,"   They are responsible for you and teaching you the important stuff you need to learn.   

 

Have you tried talking (calmly)with them as to why they feel you should not buy this?  That involves not getting mad even if it ends in "no".     Do they not let you buy anything or is this one specific thing they dont want you to have?   

 

My kids may only be 6 now so I cant contimplate how I will handle their "rebelious independence".  When will I let them shoot them self in the foot, (so to speak)  so they learn a leasson Ive been trying to teach them. 

 

 

(sigh, can't wait for the backlash for this one...)

[Limey 524]

If you want to cosplay, then do it. Yeah, for me £90 for a costume seems a little excessive, but in the grand scheme of things £90 really isn't that much.

 

If your mum isn't letting you get it then...I don't really know. I don't know the circumstances, so I cant really judge. I know my mum would ask me if I was sure a few too many times, but ultimately she wouldn't stop me if it was my money I was spending. Also, are you getting something the equivalent (money wise) to the stuff your brother and sister are getting for Christmas? Because a Cosplay is a lot cheaper than an Xbone and a TV, so I don't see how that would be a waste of her money.

 

Unless she's thinking about how much you can get out of it, which is kind of understandable, but not really justified.

[Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936]

I'm gonna get backlash from this but I feel this needs the observations of a parent.  I have read the 2 pages here and probly this statement stands out the most to me.   A teenager upset because she is not getting her way.   Like it or not, your parents have the final say untill  you are of legal age and not living under their roof.   Possibly even more so, as you describe your self as a "mentally ill teenager with a psychotic side,"   They are responsible for you and teaching you the important stuff you need to learn.   

 

Have you tried talking (calmly)with them as to why they feel you should not buy this?  That involves not getting mad even if it ends in "no".     Do they not let you buy anything or is this one specific thing they dont want you to have?   

 

My kids may only be 6 now so I cant contimplate how I will handle their "rebelious independence".  When will I let them shoot them self in the foot, (so to speak)  so they learn a leasson Ive been trying to teach them. 

 

 

(sigh, can't wait for the backlash for this one...)

Yeah, I tried to talk calmly with them, but they wont give me the time of day. It seems they just don't want me to buy this one thing. I'm not too sure what they have against it. My mental illness comes from my years of being bullied, I see a psychologist now. But it effects my behavior, I can be quite vicious, but it is out of my control.

If you want to cosplay, then do it. Yeah, for me £90 for a costume seems a little excessive, but in the grand scheme of things £90 really isn't that much.

 

If your mum isn't letting you get it then...I don't really know. I don't know the circumstances, so I cant really judge. I know my mum would ask me if I was sure a few too many times, but ultimately she wouldn't stop me if it was my money I was spending. Also, are you getting something the equivalent (money wise) to the stuff your brother and sister are getting for Christmas? Because a Cosplay is a lot cheaper than an Xbone and a TV, so I don't see how that would be a waste of her money.

 

Unless she's thinking about how much you can get out of it, which is kind of understandable, but not really justified.

It seems she just doesn't want me to have this one thing... they were reluctant to let me get my first cosplay, but gave in as it was only around £17 for an Akatsuki robe, the rest of the things I needed for that particular cosplay I had around the house.

[Guest]

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Edited December 22, 2016 by plzremoveaccountfdfd

[Dddrgn 450]

It's your own money, if you earned it on your own then you should have the right to buy what you like with it, I would buy the cosplay desplite anything my parents said.

[Paper Willow 28]

If it is your money they she needs to let you use it how you see fit and learn how to responsibly handle your own money. Maybe shes right and it is a waste. (It's not!!! It's cosplay and DTK but IF it was) You have to learn that for yourself.

[Mlpfan185 1,763]

Something was here. Something was here. Something was here. 

Edited October 10, 2018 by NONAME

[Sn0wblind 78]

So I have some money. Okay, cool. I want to spend my money, yeah? I want to buy a cosplay, with my money. Nothing wrong with that, is there? No.

 

Let's recap... I want to buy a cosplay, with MY money. No one else's...

 

I am 17 years old, I have responsibility and I know how to handle myself in this world... so does my Mum have the right to deny me buying a cosplay with my own money? She will not let me, and it's really getting on my nerves...

 

It's a Death the Kid cosplay, in case anyone was curious.

 

I can relate. My mother was raised in a very strict rural family and it shaped her parenting. My brothers and I kind of thought of her as the dictator of the house. There were so many things we wanted as kids that we weren't allowed to buy, but it all got better around age 13. I guess my more liberal dad stepped in and said "let the kids have fun!" BUT! To answer your original question...

 

Who controls the money you've earned? If it's in your parents' bank, then this may be more of a problem. If it isn't or better yet, you've got it all in cash somewhere (or hell, in your own bank account), I might have a plan. How often do you get gifts? If you've never received a gift from a friend, then it may be harder to pull off.

 

Go to one of your friends that you trust the most (preferably an older one), bring your method of payment, ask to use one of their computers and buy it from their place with your dough. Then, have it shipped to their place and have them "gift" it to you. WHAT A NICE GIFT! Though this will be a problem when your mom asks the friend's parents (an older friend may be able to dodge this especially if they are in college) why they did it or where they got the money. 

 

Though, if I knew you well I've been known to be pretty nice and get things for friends of mine that they are dying for (within reason...I won't get my uber lazy friend a new gaming pc he wants, but I did get him windows 8, a ton of games over steam, and a new graphics card )...just saying

 

If this plan won't fly, then I can only say sorry, you've gotta respect your parents' authority until you move out. It's just the terms and conditions of your room and board set by your biological landlords.