Okay, I'll have to give it a second run through for text though. Either that or send me a compilation of the text.
Alright here they are.
"Where are all ponies?" Should be "Where are all the ponies."
"I can't belive" Should be "I can't believe"
"We so glad" Should be "We're so glad."
"Wow, what's wrong, fillies?" Nothing grammatically incorrect but it sounds really awkward.
"There have been missing all pony in the village" Should be "All the ponies in Ponyville are missing"
I'm not sure if Gems cleft is an actual thing
'We are comming" should be "We are coming"
"I think, there is nothing to do but enter it" Either remove the comma or put the "i think" at the end.
"We will be able to find out where the exit" Should be "We will be able to find out where the exit is"
Also, if you use Twilight to move the spool thingy near the lava, it can roll off the screen and make the game unwinnable.