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What Do You Do When Friends' Friends Are Jerks?


Shawn Parks

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When my friends are acting like jerks.... I just take it. When a friend, punches, teases, or annoys me, I just take it. I don't see anything to do to them. I don't act back unless I'm really mad. I "might" yell. That's only when I blow my top usually. I've only yelled at friends a "couple of times." (3-4) When I maliciously yell at people, they get scared.

 

I think I happen to do better since I don't tease them. I don't punch them. I get annoying at times, but I've cooled down where I don't think I deserve abuse from them.

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Oh god.. My cousin did that to me. Me and my cousin were best friends from the time we were born, But recently she got an annoying boyfriend that's trying to turn her against me. Darn, I don't know what to do.

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I never really had any Gildas of my own as a kid, I guess in part because I didn't have a whole lot of friends in the first place. (I was bullied as well, so my friends list was limited to a small handful of fellow outcasts.) Actually, now that I think about it, a lot of the friends introduced to me by my then-best friend ended up becoming even closer friends than him, so...yeah.

 

As an adult, there are a few friends-of-friends whom I can't stand, but thankfully I rarely get the misfortune to be around them. But if I'm somehow forced to be around them for whatever reason, I make a point to be incredibly neutral towards them...that is, until the moment they slip up and make some kind of passive aggressive comment to me, at which point I can get pretty confrontational.

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Never happened to me before, but if a friend did bring a jerk into my life, and I'm being verbally bullied, I would do these:

  • Ignore
  • Be nice to them sarcastically or just because I don't feel like saying negative stuff
  • Use witty comebacks
  • Ask "Do you have anything better to do"?
  • "Eh, whatever." And I walk away.
  • Gang up on them and verbally crush them

And if I am being physically attacked:

  • Tell them to stop
  • Run
  • Some meat is going to be tenderized.

If these situations happen enough times, I'll do these:

  • Tell someone the person is friend or family with and ask them to talk about how they're treating others
  • Tell the person that I don't want to put up with their crap.
  • See how they like it
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  • 4 months later...

Happening to me right now. My friend is really good friends with a girl who's mean to me.... :(

I've just ignored her for the most part. I've been thinking about going back to my old friend group because she's really annoying me. ):<

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Avoid them but if I'm forced to hang out with them, I will make it CLEAR to the other people that I will not tolerate them and that their existence will not be a thing around me. and if it's bad enough, I will question why they are friends with the person.

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