legionbrony

I was partially joking Yeah I know people aren't all bad, but I'm not giving up my tendency towards cynicism. If someone offered me a free gatorade I'd check it for drugs first.

Pfff random acts of kindness are things nice people do, nice people don't exist silly

That's why I don't watch the news on television. It's just full of negativity. I made the decision to never watch news when I realized my grandmother is the way she is because she watches Fox News 24/7, and it turned her into a paranoid judgmental depressing negative person. I have no doubt the other news stations would do exactly the same thing, although perhaps you wouldn't sound so ridiculous saying things like "Obama is the antichrist". But still, my point. Not watching news. I get my news from people, and occasionally the internet.

Blackstone and Carin' look at each other, sharing an amused look. "Oh, no," says Blackstone. "No, we know it's not a suicide. But just imagine if Carin' here reported to her superiors and the press that the cause of death was a pony hundreds of yards away or more using magic to do this. Yeah, no, she'd be fired as soon as the words left her lips. Probably locked up somewhere, too. We gotta give them what they want to hear, you know? So even though it makes no sense to us that it could be a suicide, no doubt they will come up with some sort of ridiculous theory all on their own." Since they obviously weren't done, they continued. "Who says wonders have to be good? If you think about it from the perspective of somepony who doesn't believe in magic, don't you think it's a feat or wonder that anypony would be able to do this from so far away?" He shrugs. "Regardless of that, it was certainly thaumaturgy, unless Carin' has found evidence of somepony besides these two in here. And, in case you were wondering, which you probably were, thaumaturgy is the use of magic through an object that has a direct connection to another object or person. Like if you used a doll with somepony's likeness and a bit of them pinned to it to cast magic on them, or you used a strand of somepony's mane to determine their exact location." He tapped his mane. "That's why I keep my combs and brushes clean, folks." "So obviously the killer had some of their DNA. That's all we can determine from this evidence. Carin', anything else?" She looked at some papers. "One was employed by The Gentlecolt, as far as we can tell, and the other was employed at the Velvet Room." "Ah." Blackstone looked grim. "Wonderful. I suppose I'll have to go talk to both of those groups if I'm going to solve this case, too. Oh boy, this day just keeps getting better and better. Not only do I get Red Court twice in one day, but there's a Warlock on the loose, and White is involved..." He sighed.

At around the same time, a Unicorn named Silver Shield was reading a similar scroll as the caravan he was travelling with plodded into Timbucktu. Before this journey, Silver had never really liked sand all that much. After the walk of miles upon miles, his opinion of the stuff had not improved. He wished the Princess could have sent him in a chariot, but they were not for long distance transportation, unfortunately. He had been brought to the desert's edge and left to cross it on his own four hooves. The guard shook his head, sending sand flying everywhere, bid his travelling companions adieu, and set out to find the meeting location for this group. He hoped they would be more tolerable than the last group he went into a deadly situation with was, but it seemed all the ponies willing to do such things were fated to be nerve-grating. He sighed. Maybe this time...

"We've already examined the bodies," says Carin'. "While it was not a thorough autopsy, obviously, I am fairly sure we would not have missed something that could do this." Blackstone nods in agreement. "No, this was definitely magic. We've got a warlock on our hooves." He grimaces. "Fun, fun." "A warlock?" asks Carin'. "How is that different from a wizard?" "It's not, really," explains Blackstone. "Literally the only difference is, wizards follow the Laws of Magic, and warlocks don't. It's a warlock because the first rule of magic is pretty clear about itself: 'You shall not kill with magic'." Carin' nods, not saying anything. "I'd be willing to bet this was done using thaumaturgy; if it wasn't, then we're in way over our heads. It'd take a lot of magic to do this without it." He sighs. "And if it was done using thaumaturgy, then the killer was probably never in this room. There's no way I can trace the magic back to him..." "So it's a suicide then," says Carin'. "That's what it's looking like," agrees Blackstone.

I don't agree with all the people saying they have "no accent". First of all, you probably just don't notice it because everyone around you talks that way. Second, there is no "normal american" way of talking, really. A midwest accent is still an accent.

I live in the Western Lower Peninsula of Michigan, soooo: - We talk very fast - We slur all our words together - We say hard consonants by stopping breath with our lungs So as that last one says, we don't actually say things like 't' in words. Apartment would be "aparh' meh'". OR, especially with t's, we will just change them to d's to save energy, like 'little' becomes "liddle". And if they are after an 'n', we just omit them altogether, like in consonant, it's just "consonan'". I looked all this up by the way, since of course my accent sounds perfectly normal to me. But something new I learned when I was researching it: apparently you guys in the rest of the US say things like "quarter of three" when referring to time. Well in Michigan, we just say "quarter to three", and since we smash all our words together really fast, it's more like "quartertathree". I will be honest though, I've never ever heard someone say "quarter of three" or say the time that way before. xD

The scene inside was, as promised, not pretty. Leaving out some of the worse details, two ponies seemed to have died. It was easy to see why: there were holes in their chests by their hearts. Apparently their hearts had been torn out, somehow. "The weirdest thing is," said Carin', "the wound indicates that the hearts were ripped out without the skin being punctured; the ribs are broken outwards, not inwards. Which is, of course, impossible, so I can't tell my superiors that. I'll have to make something up." She looks at Blackstone. "What do you think it is?" (Will add more later, out of time right now)

Well I think Shego is supposed to be the evil version of Kim, but I don't know I never watched that much Kim Possible so yeah xD

Flamestreak receives a package in the mail one morning. It's nearly as large as a pony, and has a note on it that reads: Greetings, Flamestreak! You have been chosen at random from ponies all across Equestria to test our new product! There is no charge, there are no fees, and most of all, no rules! You can do anything you want with this, including return it right now, in which case we will send it to another pony for testing. We do not require you to send it back to us if you do intend to test it, however. The only thing we ask of you is this: Please, after you have tested the product for as long as you wish to, fill out the 200-page response packet that is inside this package. We need customer reviews to make our product better! Thank you so much for helping us out! -Fortis Inc.

Yup...the same is also true the other way around. Happened to me a bunch of times because all my friends were nerdy girls (I am nerdy too, nerds are cool) who weren't that popular with the guys, so after being friends for two-four years they thought I like-liked them (I didn't) and asked me. So yeah, I've had to friend zone girls before.

Well...I suppose one could do that. But the reason we might want to make friends first is this: it's safer. If you go on a date with a girl who seems nice, but she's really a psycho manipulator bad-word, then you're trapped. If you dump her she might make your life hell or stalk you or something like that. Same reason I would recommend girls don't accept dates from guys they've known for two days. But once you've spent enough time with her to truly know what she's like, you're most likely already friends. Do you see what I'm sayin'?

Thank you Regulus, you posted what I was too lazy to type up. xD

Sure, you guys can send me a PM whenever you're ready. Just try to make sure your post has reasonably good english mechanics like punctuation, okay? It's not super important but it just makes me feel better lol

All right, so I abandoned my previous 1v1 thread thingy. Why? Because I said "Come RP with me, I will use this character" but I didn't have an idea for what the RP would be about! Well, here we go. I have an RP idea, and I think it's pretty interesting. Your character receives a package in the mail one morning. It's nearly as large as a pony, and has a note on it that reads: Greetings, [Character Name]! You have been chosen at random from ponies all across Equestria to test our new product! There is no charge, there are no fees, and most of all, no rules! You can do anything you want with this, including return it right now, in which case we will send it to another pony for testing. We do not require you to send it back to us if you do intend to test it, however. The only thing we ask of you is this: Please, after you have tested the product for as long as you wish to, fill out the 200-page response packet that is inside this package. We need customer reviews to make our product better! Thank you so much for helping us out! -Fortis Inc. This is where the RP starts. If you're interested, I don't know if I can handle a bunch of RPs at once, so maybe three people at most is what I'm willing to accept, and I am pretty picky about english mechanics and whether you know how to RP in an unselfish way. Anyways, this RP can go in any direction the player wants. I'll just be handling all the NPC stuff, mostly the 'product'. :3

Blackstone rolls his eyes. "Carin' is the only one here right now, since the rest of the department is too lazy to be out here at this time. If you hadn't noticed, it's pretty late." He sighs in exasperation. "Look, I can't promise you'll be okay by yourself. There are worse things than jail, and one of 'em messed up two ponies inside this building pretty bad, if I'm not mistaken." Carin' hesitated, then nodded in confirmation. "That's what I think, anyways." The earth pony she-cop trotted back towards the door of the building. "Come in when you're ready, I guess. And I would advise anypony with a weak stomach to close their eyes and stay towards the back of the group." She then entered the building and closed the door behind her. Blackstone grumbled. "Thanks, Carin', you're making my attempts to keep them with me so much easier." He spoke up again. "Now, as I was saying. If you stay out here, one, you are not safe. Well, you're less safe. I can't say it's that common to be attacked, but considering this case is a few hours old at most, I'd say around here is considerably more not-safe than normal. Two, if you stay out here, you had better not do anything...weird, like ask what year it is or cast any magic. If you do, well, I'm denying any association with you and you can get put in the loony bin. Got it?"