Should MLP Forums have more Gender options?

[Admiral Regulus 2,769]

I'm not for this, but I'll tell you why.

 

If I am to refer to you, I must use one of three pronouns: he, she, or it. A binary gender classification system on the forums makes it very easy for me to recognize which pronoun is the correct one when I refer to you.

 

You can blabber about your gender identity all you want in your profile. That's fine and dandy. But, you see, when I look to the gender box, I only want to know one thing. Do you want me to call you a he or a she?

 

I understand it's a false dichotomy, but our language is not. I have to use one or the other, so I like to know which it is.

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

I'm not for this, but I'll tell you why.

 

If I am to refer to you, I must use one of three pronouns: he, she, or it. A binary gender classification system on the forums makes it very easy for me to recognize which pronoun is the correct one when I refer to you.

 

You can blabber about your gender identity all you want in your profile. That's fine and dandy. But, you see, when I look to the gender box, I only want to know one thing. Do you want me to call you a he or a she?

 

I understand it's a false dichotomy, but our language is not. I have to use one or the other, so I like to know which it is.

Even if they do institute more options, the vast majority of the time it's still going to just be "male" or "female" anyway. And there already is a "not telling" option so you're still going to run into the pronoun issue already.

 

Plus, just because all you care about for the gender box is pronouns, doesn't mean that other people might not have different reasons for wanting it.

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My view is that whether you agree with it or not, there are going to be quite a few people out there who will provide an answer other than "male" or "female" when asked what gender they are.

 

And since the forum does not have a way to check someone's biological sex and because people will ultimately present themselves however they want online, the gender option is going to ultimately come down to whatever the user feels like presenting themselves as. So we might as well accommodate that. It's a simple change that will have minimal negative impact on this board while making this board more accessible.

Edited September 23, 2014 by Andaasonsan

[yeet 2,027]

Yeah. I feel like this would probably end up becoming a problem. As someone could have something as their gender, and someone else might not know what it means, and call them a "he" instead of "she" and they could get offended or something. Plus if we get it, I'd probably change it to something idiotic like from a video game. Or just put Egg.

[NavelColt 22,881]

85% of the time I've been against having open fields that people can just type whatever they want into x) Kills any chance for abuse, as pessimistic a mindset as that is. Especially for something like gender, which has a very finite number of things you can fall under, anyway. Hardly difficult to list them all.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

Actually, gender is a social phenomenon separate from biological sex. Gender is whether you're mentally a man, woman, or otherwise; biological sex is whether you're male, female, or intersex. So, if the forums is asking for our genders (which it should... it's never really anyone's business what your genitals look like, after all...), more options besides male/female should exist because more genders besides male/female exist.

As i said gender identity is different than gender itself.

I would avoid using hard words like "attention whores" to describe people who are going through some sort of gender confusion. You not understanding the process of gender questioning doesn't mean that anyone who goes through something like that deserves your condescension.

That also doesn't mean everyone experiences gender confusion or that everyone who experiences gender confusion is being true about it. Usually the people undergoing gender confusion take some sort of psychological test as one certain individual undergoing such a thing has told me.

 

In other words i want to know your biological gender. If your gender identity doesn't say anything about it i am not accepting it as a valid term. Otherwise you should discern your gender identity from your gender.

pangender

See this is a term i don't quite get. Alright you don't wonna be labeled a gender... but do i call you "he" or "she"?

Plus, just because all you care about for the gender box is pronouns, doesn't mean that other people might not have different reasons for wanting it.

For the next week try referencing a pangender guy as a she, tell me what happens. If the situation doesn't get awkward i will accept your opinion. Otherwise i am adamant on differentiating gender and gender identity.

And since the forum does not have a way to check someone's biological sex and because people will ultimately present themselves however they want online, the gender option is going to ultimately come down to whatever the user feels like presenting themselves as. So we might as well accommodate that. It's a simple change that will have minimal negative impact on this board while making this board more accessible.

I agree that everyone presents themselves how they want, but that doesn't mean that just because there is more choice this board is more "accessible".

Yeah. I feel like this would probably end up becoming a problem. As someone could have something as their gender, and someone else might not know what it means, and call them a "he" instead of "she" and they could get offended or something. Plus if we get it, I'd probably change it to something idiotic like from a video game. Or just put Egg.

I truly fear stuff like that might happen. I am quite sure it already has happened with Best Pony bracket or something. Edited September 23, 2014 by NioniosTheSilent

[Jennabun 1,579]

 

 

If I am to refer to you, I must use one of three pronouns: he, she, or it. A binary gender classification system on the forums makes it very easy for me to recognize which pronoun is the correct one when I refer to you.

 

Not knowing what pronouns to use is super common on the internet. Even our binary-gendered members incorrectly get called "he" or "she" sometimes. It's not something to get panicked about. If you're in a situation where you don't know what pronouns someone uses, It wouldn't be weird to just shoot a PM to the person and ask. In fact, that's considered a very polite thing to do, especially when you are talking to someone who falls outside the gender binary.

 

And just FYI - i would stay away from using the word "it" as a personal pronoun for non-binary forum members without asking first. Very few people like it; usually it's considered quite offensive to call someone an "it."

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

Not knowing what pronouns to use is super common on the internet. Even our binary-gendered members incorrectly get called "he" or "she" sometimes. It's not something to get panicked about. If you're in a situation where you don't know what pronouns someone uses, It wouldn't be weird to just shoot a PM to the person and ask. In fact, that's considered a very polite thing to do, especially when you are talking to someone who falls outside the gender binary.

 

And just FYI - i would stay away from using the word "it" as a personal pronoun for non-binary forum members without asking first. Very few people like it; usually it's considered quite offensive to call someone an "it."

It is still really awkward to ask someone their gender when you are not sure of their appearance. Trust me i tried. It feels even more insulting if you do this to someone who is very confident of their gender.

 

He was probably saying it as one of the three language genders used. I am pretty sure you just went on "Captain Obvious" mode right here. "It" was used in slaves and low class people in the old times.

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

 For the next week try referencing a pangender guy as a she, tell me what happens. If the situation doesn't get awkward i will accept your opinion. Otherwise i am adamant on differentiating gender and gender identity. I agree that everyone presents themselves how they want, but that doesn't mean that just because there is more choice this board is more "accessible".

I haven't personally met anyone who was pangendered but I've known transsexuals, and while it feels kind of weird to say at first, you get used to it.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

I haven't personally met anyone who was pangendered but I've known transsexuals, and while it feels kind of weird to say at first, you get used to it.

Yes but that requires a level of friendship to get used to. A level of open-ness achieved by knowing said individual. What do i do when i don't know said person? Do i know what's his likes? Will he be offended by me calling him the opposite gender? Just saying.

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

Yes but that requires a level of friendship to get used to. A level of open-ness achieved by knowing said individual. What do i do when i don't know said person? Do i know what's his likes? Will he be offended by me calling him the opposite gender? Just saying.

I dunno, life is full of potentially awkward situations. I'm never sure whether to comment on a women being pregnant because I'm afraid it will turn out she's just fat.

 

If it's really important to the person, they'll probably just say something. Things will be weird for a bit but then life will move on.

 

If someone gets all bent out of shape over such a thing because you're just supposed to know what pronoun they want you to use even though you just met them, well then said person is a jerk and not much can be done about it.

[Guest]

I just don't understand that why here on the internet where most of our physical appearance can not be seen, we care so much about what pronouns we're referred to, more so than in real life. I seldom see people flip out over pronouns in real life. Why in this magical land of anonymity and masks that we may wear in the form of avatars, must we be so concerned about our gender related titles? I have been called He, and she and I answer to both so long as I know who they are talking to. I know people don't check the profile of every person they interact with, so if I get offended because they didn't read my profile, I would be being ridiculous.

 

Why is this such a big deal for strangers who may never interact with you outside a public sense know what title you attribute to yourself off the internet? And if they do talk to you personally regularly, I am sure the topic will come up on its own. I guess I just don't understand why it needs to be pointed out so much online. People point it out more than they do in real life here. Why does it matter so much? If you know who you are, that's what is important.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

I dunno, life is full of potentially awkward situations. I'm never sure whether to comment on a women being pregnant because I'm afraid it will turn out she's just fat.

 

If it's really important to the person, they'll probably just say something. Things will be weird for a bit but then life will move on.

 

If someone gets all bent out of shape over such a thing because you're just supposed to know what pronoun they want you to use even though you just met them, well then said person is a jerk and not much can be done about it.

Well aren't those brackets supposed to make us KNOW how to behave on a person? Isn't it supposed to be clearing confusion rather than inducing more?

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

I just don't understand that why here on the internet where most of our physical appearance can not be seen, we care so much about what pronouns we're referred to, more so than in real life. I seldom see people flip out over pronouns in real life. Why in this magical land of anonymity and masks that we may wear in the form of avatars, must we be so concerned about our gender related titles? I have been called He, and she and I answer to both so long as I know who they are talking to. I know people don't check the profile of every person they interact with, so if I get offended because they didn't read my profile, I would be being ridiculous.

 

Why is this such a big deal for strangers who may never interact with you outside a public sense know what title you attribute to yourself off the internet? And if they do talk to you personally regularly, I am sure the topic will come up on its own. I guess I just don't understand why it needs to be pointed out so much online. People point it out more than they do in real life here. Why does it matter so much? If you know who you are, that's what is important.

Basically all I can say is that it doesn't really have to make sense.

 

Gender is something that is really important to a lot (probably the vast majority) of people's sense of identity.

 

If you identify as a non-traditional gender, it might be a really big deal to you and your sense of self that you have the ability to represent yourself correctly.

 

Everyone's different.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

I just don't understand that why here on the internet where most of our physical appearance can not be seen, we care so much about what pronouns we're referred to, more so than in real life. I seldom see people flip out over pronouns in real life.

That's because we can make that observation with our eyes. If we supposedly fail to do so then it's insulting towards us that we can't see clearly.

 

Why in this magical land of anonymity and masks that we may wear in the form of avatars, must we be so concerned about our gender related titles?

I've learned a lot about the Internet and Spoiler alert.  ANONYMITY ON THE INTERNET IS A DELUSION.

 

Why is this such a big deal for strangers who may never interact with you outside a public sense know what title you attribute to yourself off the internet?

Well some people just like to stick with a tittle they give themselves rather than the one others give them.

 

And if they do talk to you personally regularly, I am sure the topic will come up on its own. I guess I just don't understand why it needs to be pointed out so much online. People point it out more than they do in real life here. Why does it matter so much? If you know who you are, that's what is important.

Yes but... and i am skewing this a lot. If someone says you are a criminal and you are not you feel obliged to tell them otherwise sometimes right? Well consider that a lesser version of that. 

 

If you identify as a non-traditional gender, it might be a really big deal to you and your sense of self that you have the ability to represent yourself correctly.

*Gender Identity.  Edited September 23, 2014 by NioniosTheSilent

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

Well aren't those brackets supposed to make us KNOW how to behave on a person? Isn't it supposed to be clearing confusion rather than inducing more?

Some people will be familiar with it and will immediately know what to say, while a lot of people simply won't know. At the very least it will save time for the people who are familiar with it.

 

And as I said, if you get super-offended because someone whom you just met (or just started talking to online) doesn't know the proper parlance for your unusual gender, then you're being a jerk.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

Some people will be familiar with it and will immediately know what to say, while a lot of people simply won't know. At the very least it will save time for the people who are familiar with it.

 

And as I said, if you get super-offended because someone whom you just met (or just started talking to online) doesn't know the proper parlance for your unusual gender, then you're being a jerk.

Yea okay i get that but... Should it really be open text? Can you imagine the possibilities of flashy acronyms and terms people will find on the internet for their gender? This isn't the best pony bracket where you can joke about it. This is something more serious.

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

Yea okay i get that but... Should it really be open text? Can you imagine the possibilities of flashy acronyms and terms people will find on the internet for their gender? This isn't the best pony bracket where you can joke about it. This is something more serious.

Is it more serious?

 

Your profile is ultimately about how you want to present yourself. Some people are going to take filling it out seriously and others not so much.

 

If you look at my profile it's pretty bare bones because it's not something that personally matters much to me.

 

Other people are going to get a lot more mileage out of it and have really fancy profiles with lots of text and pictures. Some people have a bunch of random silliness in their profile, others are going to treat it as more serious business.

 

 

As it stands now, there is nothing stopping me from changing my gender from male to female in my profile despite me actually being male, and there won't be anything anyone can do about it.

 

The world won't end or anything though if I do that. I'm just not taking my profile very seriously.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

@@Andaasonsan,Let me rephrase then. Is it worth it for the profile to lose all of its' seriousness? 

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

@@Andaasonsan,Let me rephrase then. Is it worth it for the profile to lose all of its' seriousness? 

Did it necessarily have any to begin with?

 

It only has as much seriousness as the person filling it out wants. It's ultimately a personal thing.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

Did it necessarily have any to begin with?

 

It only has as much seriousness as the person filling it out wants. It's ultimately a personal thing.

Well i guess. In any case we are too lazy to add these things into the about me bracket. I mean if Gender is so complicated it needs a text-free thing then it belongs to the about me spot and should be removed altogether.

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

Well i guess. In any case we are too lazy to add these things into the about me bracket. I mean if Gender is so complicated it needs a text-free thing then it belongs to the about me spot and should be removed altogether.

Why? If there are people who don't take their profile seriously,there are conversely people who do take their profile seriously and having a dedicated pull down and/or text box is something that will make them happy.

 

The point is that ultimately different people are going to want to use their profile for different things.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

Why? If there are people who don't take their profile seriously,there are conversely people who do take their profile seriously and having a dedicated pull down and/or text box is something that will make them happy.

 

The point is that ultimately different people are going to want to use their profile for different things.

Is this change worth to serve just a few people?

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

Is this change worth to serve just a few people?

It's a little text box, it's not like it's going to have some massive effect on the site.

[IridscentNionios 1,420]

It's a little text box, it's not like it's going to have some massive effect on the site.

Yes but it all begun with a small "I'm not satisfied" thing. If we start giving small things here and there who says what next they will ask for? I say we add things that are substantial, that will have an impact. This... won't...

[Andaasonsan 3,205]

Yes but it all begun with a small "I'm not satisfied" thing. If we start giving small things here and there who says what next they will ask for? I say we add things that are substantial, that will have an impact. This... won't...

So basically we've fallen to the slippery slope argument? Ugh.

 

People are going to constantly make suggestions anyway, some are going to be good and some bad, and as always they'll have to be judged on a case by case basis.

 

The way you talk about it it's like you're being asked to give up a kidney. It's a one line text box added to profiles which are already just made up of little text boxes.

FFS, profiles currently have boxes for NINE different contact methods. Nine! Next people are going to be asking for a box to put their XBox Gamertag, it will be anarchy!