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What is Number 1 on your bucket list?


Reecejackox

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Yeah I guess true love and real friends, but that's fictional kids stuff for most humans, I think potentially all, but a lot of people have themselves convinced by their complacency but I respect the genuine sense of obligation 


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Making a bucket list. Which is a paradox in and of itself. But really. Today I was talking with my mother about the very present possibility of our family dying off with me, and whether she was worried about having no grandchildren. And she said "No". Like the day I told her that her was father had died. And she said. "Nah". I had to make the arrengements for the funeral myself.

So, that's a relief. Because some of the people I know have been recently questioned by their own parents about having children and other responsibilities. But their families are normal. While ours is not. We are hypogonadal, which makes for mentally and physically under-developed people. I mean. I am a 33 year old man stuck in the body of a 17 year old anorexic adolescent. And my mind suffers and experiences depression, chronic anxiety and dissociation because of the anorexia nervosa. So, not the best father material. Especially, because I lived that with my mother already.

But this is also the reason we have such good relationship. She is mentally like a child. And so am I! So, I was never pushed to take responsibility, because she never took any responsibility as a mother, herself.

So, the no-plan plan is more or less like this. Administer what family funds are left with a dropper, so we don't have to be exposed to society. And it should work... as long as she doesn't burn it all on wine and chocolate. Which is understandable, chocolate IS delicious. But still. She has been mismanaging our rents for the past ten years. Over-spending on candy, and more chocolate, which is great. But not so much when the fridge is empty half a month in, because all the money went into sweets. But I cannot really blame her. I would have done the same.

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Well, I don't want to think of these things as a "bucket list", but, these are my goals for life as of right now:

To move, to somewhere with more freedom and better weather. Hopefully that will be happening soon. I also want to find my partner and maybe even have kids. The urge to have a child is growing in me. It's a bit wild to think of me as a mother, but I am in my mid 30s and I am certainly feeling it. My mom is happy to hear about this and is not worried about me being a good mother. Lol. But maybe moms will just say that to get another grandkid. lol


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Everything needs more woodwind!

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Finally having salvation or assurance of my salvation. It's a Christianity thing - having salvation/assurance of salvation is referring to being saved by Jesus from hell and your sins.

Either that, or finally finding a religion or non-religion that I can safely say that I believe in because right now I don't know what to believe in


*totally not up to any shenanigans* :ithastolookpretty:

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  • 1 month later...

I want to be where he’s at and live like this forever after retirement.

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♪ "I practice every day to find some clever lines to say, to make the meaning come through"♪
 

 

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Umm…for the first time in a long time I honestly don’t have a clue what I want. I have the basics and I don’t really care about anything beyond that.

On 2022-12-20 at 9:02 PM, EpicEnergy said:

Finally having salvation or assurance of my salvation. It's a Christianity thing - having salvation/assurance of salvation is referring to being saved by Jesus from hell and your sins.

@EpicEnergy If you seek Jesus that’s the main thing. As long as you want to be with Him and you do your best, that’s what matters most. Be patient and the pathways will open up before you. As St. Pio was fond of saying, “Pray, hope and don’t worry.”

  • Brohoof 1
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  • 3 weeks later...

I have no idea, but just doing nothing and having no worries in the world sounds great to me!

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