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The Dumb Things We Believed As Children!


CinemaBrony

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(edited)

I wouldn't say I believed that Santa existed, I had my suspicions that he didn't, but I could never prove it. I would sleep on the couch near the Christmas tree just so I could catch mom and dad bringing out "Santa's gifts", but I never caught them. Ever. The only evidence I had working for me was that we didn't have a fireplace -- of course, I believe there was a movie that showed how he got into houses with no chimney. I had my doubts, but in the back of my mind I couldn't help thinking that maybe, just maybe, Santa was real.

 

I also used to think that ATMs printed money and would give you some as long as you knew the passcode.

Edited by MuteMutt
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Oh my god, so many memories. Anyways here are somethings I believed as a child:

-Black people had the same name(I was 2-3 at the time so yeah)

-Chocolate Milk was from brown cows

-Santa Claus was real

-I beat up the boogey man(this was when I was 4-5, I have a story if y'all wanna hear it)

-The only way you'd die was if you were shot(I was 4)

-I thought marijuana and drugs were too different things(this kept up until I was about 7-8)

-I honestly had no clue where babies came from, but I sure as hell knew it wasn't from a stork

-I thought relationships were disgusting

 

That's all I can remember. And by the age of 9 or 10 I pretty much knew the truth about everything I believed as a child and my current beliefs were with me since the age of 10, except Catholicism. I became agnostic when I turned 14 or so. Yeah, I never really had that much of a childhood, considering that I spent a lot of time with kids older than I was.


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  • I always thought the moon and sun would follow you while walking or driving. 
  • I thought getting fired at worked meant they would take you to a room that was burning and throw you in until you burned alive. (I was always scared my father would end up dying in the Pizza Hut work room)
  • I thought I would never grow old if I believed. Stupid kid shows telling me lies. dry.png
  • I thought it was possible to fly. I was oh-so sadly mistaken
  • Camels with two humps were bad luck
  • My stuffed animals are alive(I still believe so...)
  • Actors on TV were trapped in the show, living the lives of their characters forever until the show got cancelled or didn't come on anymore.

That's all I got at the moment. 

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  On 2013-02-22 at 2:48 AM, Stranger said:

The things I was told as a kid frightened me to no end.

 

- If you point at a rainbow, warts will grow on your finger.

- If you eat a lot of sugar, worms will grow in your belly.

- If you point at a shadow at night, it will come and kill you in your sleep.

God. Not scary but still.

- For a while I got my brother to believe in something called "cat-man" for about a year until I told him it wasn't real.

 

That's about it.

Wow! Your childhood sounds downright scary! Did you avoid sugar like the plague or did you come to terms with the worm thing and way sweets regardless?

 

Things I believed as a kid:

 

*The Present Kitty (a flying fairy kitty) would bring me presents if I was good and leave them ontop of the canopy of my bed (a replacement for Santa, thought up by my parents).

 

*i thought that the npcs on Mario Kart 64 were actually other players around the world, exactly like an MMO.

 

*i was secretly obsessed with the idea of alternate dimensions and used to think that my life was actually a dream and that my dreams were my real life in a different dimension. I thought this all the eay up until I was 12 years old.

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I thought that women had black holes instead of vajj's and I thought that all women pissed out of their butts. I wonder who else thought that?


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(edited)

I thought that caps lock was irreversible and that if you didn't do your chores, a roll of carpet would summon curtains of fire to surround you as you were smothered by the carpet. (Dreams played a big portion on the first.)

Edited by XxSAINExX

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  On 2013-02-21 at 8:27 AM, CinemaBrony said:

Sesame Street being a real place

 

...wait what? sad.png ........ Well there goes my childhood, basically it's just been killed, using, not a knife, not a gun, not a baseball bat, not a sword, but words, simple plain words.     


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I used to think that all of the Greco-Roman religious stories were completely real, and that Arachne was a real person who really got turned into a spider, and that's why they can make silk and what not.

 

Needless to say, I haven't changed my beliefs in those all that much.

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My mother used to tell me when I was a child that if I fell asleep in the car, we'd get to our destination faster. I believed this and defended it hotly for years, until my brother pointed out we weren't actually getting there faster, I was just asleep and therefore time felt like it passed more quickly. ^/////^

 

I also had two imaginary friends, Emily and Elizabeth, that I thought were real until I was about eight. Then they sort of disappeared. xD

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I used to believe that lightning was activated by someone flipping a special switch on and off really fast (kind of like how kids imitate lightning with ceiling lights).... I have no idea where I got that xD


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(edited)

Ohoho... X3

 

- I believed that your heart was shaped like an actual heart pattern.

 

- I believed that women, if they wanted to, would get boobs. That it was optional. XD

 

- I believed if you stood upside down on a couch with your butt sticking up long enough, you'd eventually hover. 

 

- If you jump off of something high enough with a towel, you'd fly like a bird.

 

- I believed if you basked in the full moon long enough, you'd become a werewolf.

 

- I believed deer were vicious creatures, and to never go near them or they'll trample you.

Edited by IncognitoKiwoy
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Let's see:

1. I believed if you stepped on a crack, you would break your mother's back.

2. I believed in the Easter Bunny, Santa and all that junk.

3. I believed the monsters from "The Hills Have Eyes" would come and murder me in my sleep.

4. I thought while in the car, the sun was following me.

5. I thought shadows were evil and I therefore, had a fear of them.

6. I thought books were worth more time than friendship.

7. I always thought people were talking about me behind my back, when in reality, they weren't.

8. I believed that I would kill myself when I'm older, a bit morbid for a child to think, I'll admit. 

9. I thought Ghosts were friendly, even though I haven't met one yet. I did meet one around 2 years ago, though.

10. I thought Pokemon were real.

11. I thought there was a God. (I mean no offense to Christians, that's just how I feel, in all brutal honesty.)

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I was a stupid kid. I believed nearly everything my brother told me. For instance:

 

"Come on! Jump off the top bunk! It's totally safe!" Which resulted in a broken wrist

"This is a special potion from Simba and Nala" He said while handing me PURE PERFUME! Which I drank.

"There are vampires in the bathtub drain" I cried for weeks.

 

My parents raised me Christian, and I believed in the rapture, so one time when I woke up from a nap and noticed everyone in my family was gone but me I ran around screaming... My parents were home. They were hiding from me in the van.

 

My mother used to tell me things like Spongebob, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Pinkie and the Brain, and many other TV shows were demonic. She didn't really believe that, but they got on her nerves. 

 

That is only a few on a very long list of things I believed. Others include Santa Claus, tooth fairy, and anything ever put on an infomercial (that last one is still kind of true... sadly.)

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(edited)

1) I believed that the world was full of only good hearted folks.

 

2) I thought I was allergic to bright light so I'd purposely look at something bright so I could sneeze.

 

3) I believed that the shadows moving across the walls of my bedroom at night were alive and real.

Edited by Mighty E.
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• I thought "baby back ribs" came from real babies
• I thought babies came from the stomach, which they had to be surgically removed
• I thought the stomach was just a large pit of everything you've ever ate in your entire life.
• I thought if I could make a plane out of cardboard, it would be able to fly
• I thought I could use a plastic bag as a parachute to fall slower when I jumped off places

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1.Back when was a kid, I also wondered how can girls pee. I mean, they have no penises like men, how can they pee?

2.I think I remember vividly when I think I saw Dexter from Dexter's laboratory in the nightsky when I was young. Probably my wild imagination.


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Hmmm....

 

1) When I was young I thought Leif Erikson Day wasn't real.

2) Computers ran on magic.

3) Everyone except me saw in third person

4) Toads gave you warts. (Once after a field trip were we got to hold frogs I got stung by a bee and the bee gave me a wart)


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Most of the dumb things i believed were the result of dumb adults telling me dumb things.

 

-I used to believe that deoxygenated blood was blue, and it turns red when it hits oxygen

-I thought that shaving made your hair grow back faster, longer, and thicker.

-I thought that "The Proud Family" was satanic for a short time after finding out that pride was a sin. Still watched it, though.

-I thought that carrots gave you extremely good eyesight. Turns out they just keep your eyes from sucking.

-I thought that all cartoons were family-friendly because for the longest time I had never seen an adult cartoon.

-I thought Kraft's American Cheese was actually cheese. Yeah, no.

-I thought that watching TV made your eyes bad.

 

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- I thought your tongue would become swollen if you lied
- I thought the sun was a planet
- I thought (when I was really small) the sun rotated around the Earth xD

 

 

  On 2013-05-07 at 9:39 PM, Oshawott said:

I used to think that the sun was a planet.

So did ancient astronomers, so don't worry too much

 

  On 2013-05-07 at 11:52 PM, Mr_Jack_Swallow said:

-I beat up the boogey man(this was when I was 4-5, I have a story if y'all wanna hear it)

Yes, please.


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  On 2013-05-09 at 1:42 AM, Appetite4Democracy said:

Most of the dumb things i believed were the result of dumb adults telling me dumb things.

 

-I used to believe that deoxygenated blood was blue, and it turns red when it hits oxygen

-I thought that shaving made your hair grow back faster, longer, and thicker.

-I thought that "The Proud Family" was satanic for a short time after finding out that pride was a sin. Still watched it, though.

-I thought that carrots gave you extremely good eyesight. Turns out they just keep your eyes from sucking.

-I thought that all cartoons were family-friendly because for the longest time I had never seen an adult cartoon.

-I thought Kraft's American Cheese was actually cheese. Yeah, no.

-I thought that watching TV made your eyes bad.

 

 

 

 

So did ancient astronomers, so don't worry too much

 

 

Yes, please.

Ok so I was hanging out in my aunt and uncles bed room with all my brothers, sisters, and cousins. So then my eldest brother told us a story of the boogey man, we freaked out. So when everyone was paying attention to my eldest brother, a cousin of mine(he was 8 or 9 at the time) put on a mask and hid in the closet. So when my brother finished the story, he told me to go into the closet. I obviously said no, and started screaming because he was dragging me towards the closet. Once we got close enough my cousin jumped out of the closet and screamed. Everyone in the room except for the eldest of the cousins(or siblings) either jumped or screamed. I was closest so I had tears running down my eyes but instead of running away I yelled, "Go away Boogey Man!" And then * got real. I hit his crotch, and he hit the floor. My brothers laughed so hard that day. The story wasn't exactly funny but you wanted to hear it.

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That if I derped my eyes and the wind blew, they'd be stuck that way. (new Derpy headcannon, anyone? XD)

Santa Clause, Easter Bunny, etc.

That if I ate seeds from a fruit, a tree would grow in my stomach. 

That the Powerpuff Girls lived in Townsville (the actual city).

That Dunsparce is the best pokemon

And wait, here's the stupidest thing I believed- That the older generations of mlp were awesome. 

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Not much except I believed that "gravity" was how you would float in space and that there was no gravity on Earth. Basically just got the meaning mixed around and make myself look stupid when I said it. But other than that, I was a smart kid. Jokes.

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oh, childhood. You so funny

 

I believed:

-kissing caused pregnancy (the DNA would travel from the man to the woman)

-answering machines were giant, complicated, steampunk devices that filled up an entire room

-I was the only human in the world who could mouth words without actually making sound

-L-M-N-O-P was elemenopee

-peeing in a swimming pool turns the water blue

-wheel barrel instead of wheelbarrow

-several meant seven 

-words would attempt to escape the page unless I put a bunch of periods after each sentence to guard them.


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  On 2013-05-08 at 10:08 PM, Mister G said:

1.Back when was a kid, I also wondered how can girls pee. I mean, they have no penises like men, how can they pee?

2.I think I remember vividly when I think I saw Dexter from Dexter's laboratory in the nightsky when I was young. Probably my wild imagination.

Legitimate question. of course, if you are under the age of 10. Also, everybody did that with their favorite cartoon. I had a dream when I was little that I was part of Star Fox's team.


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