Scarfy HOOVES 310 December 20, 2012 Share December 20, 2012 this one goes out to all the guitar plays my friend does this to me all the time. Guy1: hey i forgot my pick can i borrow one of yours Guy2: (plus out a handful of guitar picks and says) "TAKE YOUR PICK" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeverNeverland 1,940 December 27, 2012 Author Share December 27, 2012 I read this just recently, and I enjoyed it. It's pretty crappy though. Why are florists good kissers? BECAUSE THEY HAVE TULIPS dies 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel 143 December 27, 2012 Share December 27, 2012 What did the accountant say to a religious leader? You lost half of your prophets! Get it? ... Oh God my Accounting class has fried my brain. 3 "Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37 "In the beginning, God created the heavens, the Earth, and Octavia, who is best pony." Genesis 1:1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sanic Screwdriver 345 December 27, 2012 Share December 27, 2012 What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, it just waved. You sea what I did there? You know what? I SHORE did! Why didn't the clam have any friends? He was Shellfish. How do ponies greet eachother? "Hay!" Oh my gosh -_- lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartOfSilver 41 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 I got a good one! Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection, except for one movie: He's never gonna give you UP! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morethanicecream 116 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 Here is one that is sort of a joke. A man walks into a bar and is in pain (metal bar). Here is another one: What is up? The sky. Stupid ones that are just stupid. At least they are terrible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nothing&NoOne 695 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 (edited) She criticized my apartment, so I knocked her flat. A ship carrying red paint collided with a ship carrying purple paint. Both crews were marooned. Saddle Arabia. That is all. Edited January 2, 2013 by Princess Nightingale Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunny Fox 5,950 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? "You're too young to smoke!" What do you call a fish with no eyes? "A fsh" What do you call a blind antelope? "No eye deer" What's brown and sticky? A stick. 1 Happy minion of The Fabulous One! Signature by Midnightive Check out my blog! https://mlpforums.com/blog/1083-sunny-side-den/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otter 1,942 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 What did the robot say to the centipede? Get a new car. What does a militaristic fish live in? Your mom's basement A fish TANK. I'm a big FAN of renewable energy. how even is otter and how can it be if Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gone Airbourne 21,977 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 What is a brony without a pony? He's a phony brony What does the organization called the KKK actually stand for? Krispy Kreme Klan What does the guy with an injured eye say? I need an "eye" pad :3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Appetite4Democracy 452 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 Schrodinger and Heisenberg are driving in a car and get pulled over. A cop walks up to them and says, "Do you have any idea how fast you were going?" and Heisenberg responds, "Well, no, but I knew exactly where I was." The cop decides to search them and finds a dead cat in the trunk. He says, "DO YOU GUYS KNOW THERE'S A DEAD CAT IN THE TRUNK!?" and Schrodinger replies, "I do now." Nerd jokes. 3 "For those about to rock, we salute you!"- ACϟDCSignature by Gone ϟ Airbourne (click the signature) My Tumblr Member of the Equestrian Gaming Clan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TailsIsNotAlone 3,695 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 (edited) There are some truly terrible puns in here, but I think I can do even worse... Have you seen nick? I shaved this morning and got one. Edited January 2, 2013 by TailsAlone "Human beings fascinate me Being just the way they are..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunny Fox 5,950 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Jamal." The other goes to a family in Spain they name him Juan". Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Jamal. Her husband responds, "But they are twins. Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal." More to be found at this web-site here: http://www.mds975.co.uk/Content/funnies14.html 1 Happy minion of The Fabulous One! Signature by Midnightive Check out my blog! https://mlpforums.com/blog/1083-sunny-side-den/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Broccoli 127 January 2, 2013 Share January 2, 2013 -What kind of fly likes butter? : A butterfly -The protagonists of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the MANE six (well who doesn't know that?) 1 -"My little pony, not yours!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Appetite4Democracy 452 January 4, 2013 Share January 4, 2013 Here's an absolutely horrid pun. KIM JONG IS DEAD!? I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST IL! Also, If you second-guessed your plans to book time to visit a Native American society... THAT WOULD BE A RESERVATION RESERVATION RESERVATION! 1 "For those about to rock, we salute you!"- ACϟDCSignature by Gone ϟ Airbourne (click the signature) My Tumblr Member of the Equestrian Gaming Clan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feather Spiral 1,892 January 4, 2013 Share January 4, 2013 Maths major pickup line: I don't mean to be obtuse, but you're acute girl. And here, have a perverted physicist: - We need to determine our coordinates to pick a satellite. - But Y? - To watch some X-rated movies. - Well, have fun. I'll go catch some Z's. I take writing commissions. "Nerds build the world, artists decorate it, warriors protect it, leaders talk everyone into doing their jobs." -me, 3 Nov 2017 "That's not a pie, that's a pastry with an identity crisis!" ~Jeric Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dogmaster312 1 January 4, 2013 Share January 4, 2013 The plot of kirby's epic yarn: A rift in the fabric of time and space! Kirby doesn't eat anything there though, its too stringy. As paper toad would say, stuff like this really crimps my corners.... Wow... Too much chuggaaconroy for my own good. He's just punbearable! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feather Spiral 1,892 January 12, 2013 Share January 12, 2013 (edited) How do Twilight and Celestia correspond when they can't write letters? On Spyke. How does a baby empty its bladder/bowel? Briefly. Dog pickup line: "You must be my backyard... cuz I really dig you." If Mel Gibson decided to play in theatres, he'd be Mel o'drama. To locate sailors out at sea, you can use your gaydar. Sometimes you think you've met a really friendly crocodile, but it may also be an alligaytor. Oh, I found this one on Tumblr: "YOU'RE NOT MY REAL LADDER!" I shouted at my stepladder. UPDATE Here are a few Lord Of The Rings puns, cuz I've been watching behind-the-scenes content with my mom. Living in Lindon is pretty hard; you must first learn the entire Elfabet. If you ask me, Sauron just wanted to keep an eye on that tower. I can't get myself to face Saruman's Uruk-Hai army, I'm afraid they Lurtz me. If I had to create a safe website in Moria, I would take Aragorn because he's great against trolls. If we keep destroying forests like this, we'll never see the Ent of it. Q: What was Sauron saying every time he saw the One Ring on Frodo? A: "Ring, ring, why don't you give me a call?" Q: And how did Samwise manage to stay loyal to Frodo all along? A: Force of hobbit. Q: What does a greedy dwarf say? A: Gimli that! Q: What's the Elven royal spacecraft called? A: The Arweng. Amir: Where's my nephew? dude: He's far, Amir. Omir: Why is he not with my son? dude: He's a bore, Omir. Edited January 12, 2013 by Feather Spiral I take writing commissions. "Nerds build the world, artists decorate it, warriors protect it, leaders talk everyone into doing their jobs." -me, 3 Nov 2017 "That's not a pie, that's a pastry with an identity crisis!" ~Jeric Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MagicalStarRain 599 January 12, 2013 Share January 12, 2013 Did you hear about the fight at the candy store, today? Two suckers got licked! The starboard side of the ship was hit! we have to take it to the port! (Port is left on a ship, Starboard is right on a ship) 1 Click this dragon hatchling to help it grow, please! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feather Spiral 1,892 January 20, 2013 Share January 20, 2013 (edited) I don't care much about intimate care products. It's just junk food. °_° I stroked Viscrafilly's head and Feldermane. (felt her mane) Have you thought of your next action? Of course! Gaston: Hey baby, why don't you hang out with an awesome man like me? Just look at these huge muscles and large pecs! Belle: It's all for boasting. You're just like a ton of gas to me. UPDATE: I forgot to mention this thread's title, which is obvious enough to actually get CONFUSED with the one it's inspired from. Also several of the show's episode titles, dunno if they've been mentioned: Owl's Well, About Time, Call of the Cutie, A Friend in Deed... Not to mention locations and names, but I think someone submitted them already. Moving on. Fish can't remember things well, unless they resort to Nemonics. Seiko in German is "psycho" If we lived in Hobbiton, we'd be really Merry... though some of us could be caught Pippin at people in the shower. Edited January 17, 2013 by Feather Spiral I take writing commissions. "Nerds build the world, artists decorate it, warriors protect it, leaders talk everyone into doing their jobs." -me, 3 Nov 2017 "That's not a pie, that's a pastry with an identity crisis!" ~Jeric Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunny Fox 5,950 January 22, 2013 Share January 22, 2013 I'll tell you what I like about The Neverending Story, as long as we're on the subject: Hey, did you hear about Atreyu's untrustworthy brother? His name is Btreyu. 2 Happy minion of The Fabulous One! Signature by Midnightive Check out my blog! https://mlpforums.com/blog/1083-sunny-side-den/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Old Head 4,816 January 22, 2013 Share January 22, 2013 Are you prepared to shake your head in disbelief for so long it'll fall off? Here goes nothing. What do you call a soft drink that was murdered?... DIE-t Coke.You are free to facepalm now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aaramus 449 January 22, 2013 Share January 22, 2013 (edited) I have a few golf puns that I can pitch to you. I think this golf addiction is driving a wedge between us. Yeah that was pretty bad, I think we should putt it behind us. Edited January 22, 2013 by Aaramus 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feather Spiral 1,892 January 22, 2013 Share January 22, 2013 I have a few golf puns that I can pitch to you. I think this golf addiction is driving a wedge between us. Yeah that was pretty bad, I think we should putt it behind us. You can be a real asshole sometimes, you know that? My nerves are completely scrambled by this, I'm completely handicapped by it. I'm green with jealousy that they let you say these things and drive me insane. I just wanna club you in the balls, or hang you on a hook and slice at your butt skins. I think those would be fairways to get back at you, since my frustration goes in par with violent thoughts. But all I can do is shut up and keep eating my chips. I take writing commissions. "Nerds build the world, artists decorate it, warriors protect it, leaders talk everyone into doing their jobs." -me, 3 Nov 2017 "That's not a pie, that's a pastry with an identity crisis!" ~Jeric Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aaramus 449 January 22, 2013 Share January 22, 2013 You can be a real asshole sometimes, you know that? My nerves are completely scrambled by this, I'm completely handicapped by it. I'm green with jealousy that they let you say these things and drive me insane. I just wanna club you in the balls, or hang you on a hook and slice at your butt skins. I think those would be fairways to get back at you, since my frustration goes in par with violent thoughts. But all I can do is shut up and keep eating my chips. Not going to lie, your puns are a bit rough, you need to iron them out. As you can see mine are taylor made and I have them down to a tee. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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