Do you ever regret being a brony?

[Gigapony 650]

All right, this is probably a very stupid topic, I know. But I'm genuinely curious because I am feeling a bit conflicted lately and I'm hoping to get some insight or at least maybe someone who can make me see things differently or feel better.

 

Has anybody here, in spite of all the good this fandom may have done for you, ever felt like being part of this fandom was more trouble than it was worth? Has anybody ever had a moment when they said, even for a second, "Maybe I ought not be part of this"?

 

I ask because I feel a little bit that way recently. And mind you, I'm not talking about liking/not liking the show, because I'll always like it no matter what; after all, it's just a show for God's sakes, and if it entertains me I'll watch it. I'm talking about the fandom itself and all it brings with it (good and bad). And I am talking specifically, of course, about the much-mentioned "haters".

 

I've always been an open brony. No, I don't shove it in people's faces or cram it down their throats, but I wear shirts like any fan of anything would do, and buy merchandise for myself like any regular person would. I've been lucky enough to do all this without coming across any real negative experiences (and in fact, actually got some positive ones) but I feel like any day now I'm due for the dreaded moment when someone just has to shoot first, so to speak, and I'm not sure how I would react to that.

 

I'd like to think I would be super-cool and ignore the guy, or even better, come up with some witty retort that leaves him speechless. But I know myself better than that, and in the heat of the moment, I'm not sure that I wouldn't just end up making myself look foolish and end up going home with a bruised ego and more ravaged self-esteem.

 

I know everyone says "Just ignore them", "They just want a rise out of you", "Don't mind the trolls", "Be proud of who you are", and all the rest. I try to, and I tell myself I don't care about the hate, but the truth is I do. I love being a part of this fandom and I love all the good it's done for me, but I just don't like knowing that I'm seen the way they see us. I've always been an outcast and I learned to dislike being part of a "hated" group, it makes me uncomfortable and I really hate being, well, hated.

 

I don't want to leave the fandom, and going "back to the closet" leaves a bad taste in my mouth because I have a right to express myself. But I just can't shake the feeling of "Oh boy, what have I gotten myself into?" whenever I read about all the horrible nasty things people say/do to us for liking a bloody television show. I feel like it can't be worth the stress.

 

Am I alone in feeling this way? Has anyone else thought like this? Am I as big an idiot as this post makes me look?

 

I do sincerely thank anyone that spared their time to read this wall of text. I suppose I'm venting a bit, but it's been bothering me and if there's one thing I know I can count on this fandom for, it's to give support.

[Iota _Riley_ 5]

Well, I don't "regret" becoming one but I do wish I could see it from a non Brony standpoint.

 

I also wish I would've become one sooner.

[Zygen 6,065]

Eh, well i've yet to come out the closet so my opinion may be a bit odd, but actually yes partially at times.

 

Its more of a"Am I really doing this? Am I really watching a show about ponies, and not having anyone know about it?" Its just kinda a shock to me sometimes still, I love the fandom and would never leave this forums or anything, but you know, I always get doubts occasionally on why i'm watching this show.

 

Of course I got that feeling back when I first started watching, and its got even less and less common with time. I hardly get those moments anymore now.

 

of course they happen, but then I realize that the community here is awesome, ponies are awesome, and society male stereotype norms have no idea what they're talking about. Then I don't feel weird or guilty or whatever for liking the show.

 

I think alot of people have regrets occasionally on it.

[DaReaper 1,943]

Do i wish regret being a bron, quite simple hell no, if enjoying a awesome show about a group of great friends searcing for the magic of friendship is wrong then i dont wanna be right. but seriously i live life with no regrets like when i bought that Dragonforce CD, but i dont care what people say and i will never regret being a brony

[The EverFree Pony 64]

Well I just got into the fandom this summer so my friend only know through the shit tones of ponies I post on my facebook LIKE A BOSS may I add. I don't know how they will react in real life but am sure it won't be to bad I got pretty understanding friends BUT the rest of school o boy I live in hawaii son and am white. But I don't care one bucking bit am buying a pony shirt this summer and am wearing it my first day back to school if anyone ask I will say ITS A FLUTTERSHY AND SHES A YELLOW PONY WITH A PINK MANE CHEERING FOR A BLUE PONY WITH A RAINBOW MANE CAN YOU DIG IT!!! well maybe not yell it at everyone and be a jerk but I am going to wear it:) I hope you will always stay with the herd I love seeing your posts all over this site friend if u ever need support you got all of us your family your herd your friends:)

[Galen 1,353]

I don't regret it one bit. I love MLP: FiM, and nearly everyone I've met in the fandom is awesome in one way or the other because they're all supportive of one another. I've never met a Brony in person (tho I will at the end of August), so the one's I've met online are the only ones I can really talk about. In my experience, a number of online communities outside of the MLP fandom proved less than desirable, but I can't say that about this fandom overall, which just goes to show the morals presented in the show are indeed appliccable irl. And some people I know irl do know I'm a Brony and thus far haven't really shown any sign of intolerance. I got teased a bit but it's all in good fun.

[Gigapony 650]

society male stereotype norms have no idea what they're talking about.

This bit right here brings up one of the things that's got me feeling off. You're absolutely right about the male norms being outdated and silly and whatnot. You know that, and I know that, and I'm sure most bronies know it too, but the rest of the world doesn't, and that's what gets me.

 

The majority opinion on what a bloke "should and shouldn't" do is ridiculous, but it is the majority, and that's not set to change any time soon, and I don't even think us bronies are going to make a dent in it. So what bugs me the most is the fact I'm going to keep being reminded how "wrong" I am, and how different I am, and how much of an outsider I am, and that's something that I fear could really damage how much I enjoy this fandom.

[Mikestar 346]

 

 

I'd like to think I would be super-cool and ignore the guy, or even better, come up with some witty retort that leaves him speechless. But I know myself better than that, and in the heat of the moment, I'm not sure that I wouldn't just end up making myself look foolish and end up going home with a bruised ego and more ravaged self-esteem.   I know everyone says "Just ignore them", "They just want a rise out of you", "Don't mind the trolls", "Be proud of who you are", and all the rest. I try to, and I tell myself I don't care about the hate, but the truth is I do. I love being a part of this fandom and I love all the good it's done for me, but I just don't like knowing that I'm seen the way they see us. I've always been an outcast and I learned to dislike being part of a "hated" group, it makes me uncomfortable and I really hate being, well, hated.

 

Ok.. no I've never regretted being in this fandom. I LOVE being in the fandom. It's brought so much joy into my life.

 

Don't ever strive to come up with the witty retort that leaves them speechless.  yeah it would be great if we could all do that! but nothing you say will EVER change what another person thinks when they have their minds set. do i come up with 'witty' replies? All the time. but I have zero expectations on what the reaction will be because I can never predict or control how the other person may react. having low expectations keeps me from being disappointed.

 

People always say "Just ignore them." I think what they are really saying is "don't respond to them" That is different from just ignoring them/the situation. Your feelings on this matter are VERY valid and real. It's not good at all to ignore those feelings. it's also not 'wrong to feel them. It's what you DO with those feelings that count. Of course it hurts.

 

You can go down one of two paths... hate back... get into a fight, end up getting hurt... or... go the other path which is of love. Not loving them per say, but loving what YOU love. In this case, MY Little Pony. So basically let their hatred feed your love and don't let anyone else's opinion stop you from doing what makes you happy. 

 

Weigh it up. there are many more people around you who like this fandom... here on these boards or other places on the net, than there are who dislike/hate this fandom. if you surround yourself with like minded people then they will FAR out weigh the ones the choose the path of hate.

 

of course, I could just be full of it which I prob am LOL but i do hear you and i do care.

 

 

 

Am I as big an idiot as this post makes me look?

 

 

Why would this post make you look like an idiot? On the contrary you are thinking carefully about your options, realizing you dont' have all the answers, and willing to listen to what others have to say. Doesn't sound idiotic to me at all.

 

Mike.

[Durandal 623]

No matter what you do, no matter what you say, no matter what you're a part of, there's going to be someone out there who hates you and the symbols you rally under. Nothing will change this, as it is a part of human nature. We have dissenting opinions, it comes with diversity - everyone thinks they have the answer, and sometimes people think that means anyone who doesn't agree with their answer is wrong. Even positions of moderation or neutrality have its critics - people who believe them spineless, unable to support a cause out of fear.

 

In short, I don't regret being a brony because I understand that any position comes with some form of opposition. For every stance I take, I amass another group that opposes me and my views. Does that knowledge frighten me? To some extent, yes. But can I prevent it? No. I have to take a stance on things eventually, and I have to allow myself to actually like things, because otherwise how is life worth living?

 

People will hate you, its statistically inevitable. Regretting being a part of something because someone out there might hate you is an exercise in futility. I would suggest you stop now while you're ahead, it'll save you a lot of grief.

[Xanatos 162]

So, in short, you're having doubts because people might hate you for what you like?

 

Screw 'em. I've heard countless times "Real men don't watch cartoons about ponies!"

 

Well, you know what? That's bull.

 

Real men enjoy whatever they damn well please and do not have to justify it to anybody.

 

And as for being constantly reminded of how different you are...Great! Sameness is boring. Blind conformity is stagnation. Difference is a fine trait to have provided you're not just being contrary for its own sake.

 

On the other hand, I've got palsy and autism so I've spent my entire existence as an unfairly-judged outcast. Probably bothers me less than it would a normal person since I'm used to it.

Edited July 15, 2013 by Xanatos

[Gigapony 650]

@@Mikestar, very sound advice, mate. Thank you for that.

 

I guess it just takes getting used to. Without going into too much useless detail, in my youth I was constantly judged and bullied, and I often chose the more difficult path and tried to retaliate, and once I reached a point in my life where I really wasn't equipped to defend myself, I tried to ignore it but all I did was push the bad feelings under the rug, which obviously isn't healthy. Now I instinctively take being hated/disrespected a lot more seriously than I probably ought to, and it's a bad habit that I need to change.

 

@@Durandal, you are right, it's a pity but hate will always be a part of life.

 

And it's weird because I've been part of fandoms with plenty of haters before. I've always loved Pokémon and any fan of those games knows how many haters it has. I'm a Transformers fan and we've always had the stigma of "geeky loser toy collectors" to deal with. I'm also an anime fan and I don't think I need to remind anyone of how hated "weeaboos" are. So being hated on is nothing new to me.

 

But those haters were always so... easy to avoid. They were nowhere near as vocal and in-your-face as anti-bronies, at least that's how it seems to me. I never once saw any "anti-Transformers" groups on Facebook, or "kill all the weeaboos" memes. Which is not to say there weren't any, but one could probably go a LONG time without running into one. They seemed like so much more of a silly fringe group and not like the "us vs. them" feeling of brony haters. Maybe that's why MLP haters affect me so much more, because they seem to be all over the place and they take any chance they get to give grief.

 

But I should clarify, I won't be leaving the fandom any time soon. It's been too good to me. But I do get frustrated when I think to myself "Jeez, how many weird unpopular hobbies am I gonna get? Can't I for once be into something people won't judge?" which is a silly sentiment but there it is.

Edited July 15, 2013 by Gigapony

[Kenny Tweek 5]

I didn't read all the topic, only the first post, and I say, yes. I had this feeling before, but with sometime, it gone, 'cause I realize that I really don't need to worry about this, because who hate a show and people who like it, really, REALLY don't deserve my atention... Also, this fandom, I can't regret of being part of it, 'cause it literally saved my life (yeah...), and now i'm a complete diferent person then what I was before, and i'm happy, 'cause I feel good with it, and that's what really matter. If you're happy with the fandom, just follow yourself, and don't let any guy who have a so-small brain that makes him hate a TV show stop you enjoying what you like. My life now is kind of composed by the fandom, 'cause everytime that i'm on the PC, there are ponies somewhere (and I pratically just listen to brony music), and I have passed for some descriminations, too, but even that can't hurt me anymore, 'cause this fandom changed me so much that i'm a too-happy person, and to make me sad, you need a loooooot of time... So, don't worry, there are always someone like you, and in that case, there is, probably, a lot.

By the way, to end up this, remember this: Make what you love, and love what you make. I learned this with MandoPony. Hope I helped. :3

Edited July 15, 2013 by Kenny Tweek

[The Swedish Brony 153]

I understand how you feel. I was too in this stadium for not so long ago where I questioned myself for watching this show about ponies and how people would react if they knew. In fact, I was terrified to let anyone know my "big secret".

 

But I have come turns with this now and I can proudly say that I don't regret A SECOND of joining this amazing fandom. I think you could almost call this the only fandom that I have ever really invested myself in. I'm a fan of a ton of other things but this is what I always come back to.

 

I wouldn't call me a open brony but I'm working on it and if someone asks I won't deny it.

All I can say to you is (like some has already said) that there will always be haters and there's nothing you can do about it. All you can do is carry your head high while they continue to throw their in accurate "arguments" at you. 

[Mikestar 346]

 

 

I guess it just takes getting used to. Without going into too much useless detail, in my youth I was constantly judged and bullied, and I often chose the more difficult path and tried to retaliate, and once I reached a point in my life where I really wasn't equipped to defend myself, I tried to ignore it but all I did was push the bad feelings under the rug, which obviously isn't healthy. Now I instinctively take being hated/disrespected a lot more seriously than I probably ought to, and it's a bad habit that I need to change.

 

Taking it seriously is actually a good thing. ignoring it totally is the bad thing. You can't ignore this kind of thing because ignoring it doesn't make it go away, nor does it make it hurt less.

 

When people say "ignore it" don't take them literally! I use to do the same and it ended up in disaster. Ignoring someone can mean don't respond. Cyber bullies HATE not getting a response, or getting a very short response such as "You''re boring me. See ya!" and nothing further. Then... since you aren't ignoring it, you take the feelings to someone who can help you deal with them, rather than saying Oh thee feelings aren't there.. I'm too tough to feel them. You need to allow yourself time to feel the feelings and see them for what they really are... feelings. Not necessarily the truth about you. "I feel crap" is different than "I am crap"

 

So you've brought these feelings here... to this board. Good move! I dunno if anything I can say will help. No one but you can bring yourself to a point of feeling so self assured that it doesn't matter what other people think of you. Do I worry what other people think of me? Hell yeah! Sometimes to the degree that I doubt myself and even hate myself, we are all only human. With me, I bounce out of it by reminding myself that the people around me who do love and accept me are FAR more important in the grand scheme of my life than the ones who don't like me. Then they become mere specs on the earth and i wonder how they ever managed to get at me at all.

 

Hope that helps... be who you are.

 

mike.

[Xanatos 162]

But I do get frustrated when I think to myself "Jeez, how many weird unpopular hobbies am I gonna get? Can't I for once be into something people won't judge?" which is a silly sentiment but there it is.

 

What's a popular hobby? Football or something? Because there are people who don't care for football, and you'd still be judged by them. Futile thoughts, my friend!

[SwigglySwiggly 358]

Sometimes I have doubts about the show and I left like giving up, but I held on and never regretted a thing, being a brony or part of any other fandom has its ups and downs like a roller coaster, the trick is it not let go, stay resilient and have faith for your fellow fans, the downhill slope is almost done, the roller coaster if gonna go up again soon 

Edited July 15, 2013 by SwigglySwiggly

[Raritas 6,820]

I guess I have the same problem as you. I am not open about the show or it's fandom around my friends as I am worried as to how they would react. I know I shouldn't, as like you said, we all have a right to express ourselves, but I am slightly paranoid as to how people will act. I am glad that I joined the fandom, as I believe it has made me a more open-minded person. I just wish personally I would stop worrying about what people think of me. 

[Shanks 10,811]

Not at all, it is one the best things to happen to me in a long time actually. I watch a great show look at some amazing fanart and fanfics and be a part of a community that while there is the occasional jerk just like in anything has some of the nicest people I have ever met. And it has helped me with my depression by reminding me that life isn't all doom and gloom and has brought out a creative side in me that I have neglected for far too long. Yes there are going to be haters and troll but I have been bullied, hated and trolled over so many things that I have developed a skin made of durasteel and have stopped caring a long long time ago. Haters are going to hate but the jokes is on them, while they are wasting their time and energy hating I am just going to keep doing whatever makes me happy including ponies.

[Wonderbolt_Spitfire 235]

It's okay to vent, but if you haven't had a negative experience then you don't know what or how it will happen. Depending on where you live most negative experiences don't go as bad as the extremes you hear about. They are usually pretty civil (relatively speaking) and the worst that happens is words are exchanged.

 

There is always going to two sides to everything (one who loves and one who hates), and you just have to do what makes you happy. Your happiness and mental & physical health should always come first.

[Armin 168]

Quite a few times I have been on the verge of leaving the fandom. This fanbase can be an incredibly embarrassing place to be associated with at times, what with the outrage of Derpygate and Twilicorn. Don't like a pony getting ranked up or the voice getting changed? Tough, grow up and deal with it.

[tehepicpony 22]

Well, I do get some comments and some really horrible other things, but what you gonna do? That just comes with the package of being in any fandom, like homestuck (Although FiM gets A LOT more hate). I have to ask my sister to be my "lookout" when i'm buying pony toys from toys r us, I find that hilarious.

[xblackrosesx 81]

Well, I don't "regret" becoming one, I actually wish I became one sooner.

What's to regret? This fandom is the definition of AWESOME.  

[Sickman 205]

Many years ago, I made the conscious decision to never regret anything I do.
Regret is one of the needless human emotions that keep people from moving forward, and achieving their full potential.
So, to answer your question, no. Absolutely not.

[Ali_Derp 89]

What?!?! Regret Being A Brony? 

No Way!

The only thing I regent is not becoming one earlier. I don't think anyone will ever regret such a thing!

[Astrobrony 655]

Why should I regret liking the show and liking ponies?  It's just a TV show after all.  There are more important things in the world to worry about.  Ponies are just a really nice, and really awesome distraction.