Envy

I wanted to tell this lady in the restroom to not talk on her phone while in there because that makes me uncomfortable. I didn't know there was someone on the phone in there until I had already began going. Ugh. Nevertheless, I kept my mouth shut because there's no reason to start drama over such a thing... Even if I get one to stop (which is unlikely), there's nothing to stop another from just doing the same thing. Pick your battles. I spoke my mind a lot at my former job when coworkers did things that I found inconsiderate and annoying. It never changed anything and probably just made people hate me.

In the 30s and overcast today. Much better weather! I know that sounds crazy, but my room feels so much better! lol

I built a new one back in September, I can't believe I haven't posted it yet! OS: Windows 11 CPU: AMD Ryzen 5 5600 3.5 GHz 6-Core Processor 16 GB RAM 1 TB SSD, 2 TB HDD Radeon RX 6700 XT 12GB video card And this tower.

It is 62 degrees, which fortunately is cooler than it was supposed to be today. Unfortunately, the sun has been out the whole day. I just got home from work and my room is way toooo warm. I hate days like this in the winter, they are so miserable.

Neither does my new one. I don't think it crossed my mind too many times when getting it built. I wanted one of the pretty glowing fan cases and the one I got doesn't even have a place for a CD drive. =( I'm just so used to having them, it's weird.

I ordered a CD of a Rose of Versailles OST. And then an hour or two later it dawned on me that my PC doesn't have a CD drive and so I also ordered an external one. PCs without CD drives? Come on, now. I feel old.

It's weird. I don't know. The health issues I've been through have made me feel much, much older. But the way I reacted to the initial ones by going into denial and not assuming I had a future and living my life in that way, trying to live like my life "before" (early college, high school) has the very opposite effect. I have wisdom due to my health issues, but I do not have much experience "adulting" and kept a rather immature mindset for a long time. I'm only just now beginning to recover from that, beginning to think about my life.

Since it's a Sunday and I'm off, and didn't have to take a shower immediately after getting up, I'd say about 10-15 minutes after getting up (I took my dog out and fed her first).

Here's one that is a bit political, but I think it's okay to post here since it's just a confession: I was against abortion back in my childhood, teens, and even a bit into my adulthood. I'm pretty sure that somewhere waayyyy back in my posting history here I even said as such. I felt weird about it even back then.

That oughta count as equal to a Rick Roll. That song is even worse than Never Gonna Give You Up!

My first crush that I can remember? Hard to even know who that was... The first I remember for sure I'm pretty sure moved to Florida. Would be funny, did she realize she isn't straight? Well, either way, she lives in Florida. Florida is an absolute deal-breaker for me. I'd be so miserable there that even if I was with the love of my life, how much Florida sucks in every single way would overshadow any joy of being with the love of my life. Of which, I'm fairly confident my first crush isn't, anyway. But remove FL from the equation, I don't know. I hardly knew her back then, and I certainly don't know her at all anymore over two decades later.

As a teenager, I liked Tamaki from Ouran High School Host Club. I don't crush on animated characters, though. That was just back when I was a teenager.

I've only heard a couple of stories in my life: In middle school, I had a church sleepover with the other kids. Our church had two chapels (? the rooms where you attend services), but one I never remembered ever using. The kids told silly stories that you could hear a ghost playing the organ in the unused chapel. Lol. The other was a neighbor kid of my grandparents' who told me that he had a ghost in his basement. Lol. Not too scary, I guess, but that's all I've got. One that *did* scare me but wasn't exactly a ghost story was when I was a child, I had a neighbor that I played outside a lot with. One day we were digging in my yard and we ran into a root of a tree. She told me that it was bones and that we were located over a lost Native American burial site. :O

^^That reminds me of another unglamorous moment for me! One day it was hailing, so I peaked out in my backyard to see it. It was tiny enough that it wasn't going to hurt me or anything. Anyway, when I walked outside I shut the back door behind me. Not remembering that there's something up with our backdoor and it locks you out no matter what. I was alone that day, and I was not prepared at all for actually being outside. I was in my house clothes, which includes really short shorts that I never wear outside normally. No makeup on, no shoes, no phone, no keys. D: ! I was so scewed. Lol. I got soaked on top of all of that. This got more unglamorous. I climbed up on the fence that faces the front yard and hoped that a neighbor would pass by so I could borrow their phone to call my mom. That never happened. Eventually, I decided I had to climb over the fence. My aunt and uncle lived a couple of blocks away. However, this did, of course, mean walking through my neighborhood soaked and not prepared or dressed to be seen. IIRC, I ran, now imagine that. Even more unglamorous... LOL.

I tend to dress in cute clothing and jewelry (or at least, so I think so), but that's where the cuteness ends.

I am the laziest on Saturdays. I would say Sunday as well, but I do my laundry and grocery shopping on Sundays, so they are never as lazy.

The temperature is nice - in the low 50s, but it is far too sunny for my tastes. It's making my room too warm, even though the temperature is great. Hm... GO AWAY SUN!

I'm talking about IRL, though. Lol.

Work and rehearsal in the evening. Just another day for me.

My first post here was talking about how I'm always taken to be younger. Well... Now, not so much. In fact, I now get assumed to be a couple of years older than I am. D: How did I go from being mistaken to be 12 or under at age 21 to now being mistaken for a couple of years older in my 30s? Lol. (at least my fear of my hair turning grey hasn't come to be yet, instead my hair has turned from black to dark brown. Weird)

I've always been boring. lol

The orchestra trip - now just over ten years ago - where I sat my bassoon down on a chair not realizing it was a strange chair that curved down at the front and it came crashing to the floor. It's been ten years, my bassoon is fine. Alas, it is still terrible to think about. Also unglamorous was me before I got treatment for my arthritis and tried working a stocking job. Limping constantly, walking incredibly slowly because I physically couldn't walk faster, having to have firm support with my hands on a sturdy object when standing up. That's old lady stuff. No one told me it could happen in my 20s. lol If we're referring to fashion. Probably me when I just wore jeans and t-shirts all of the time. Very unglamorous indeed. You would never guess I ever did that if you saw me now. lol Or... okay, here's an embarrassing story. In my junior year of high school, those of us in the band played Pomp and Circumstance for the seniors at graduation, of course. Me, I had a lot of trouble finding a matching pair of shoes to wear, and I had to go with unmatching shoes. It's been so long now, I can no longer remember how bad of a match they were... But OMG. Terrible. Oddly enough, that isn't the worst thing that happened that day, but it's unrelated.

Simply it's location (in god awful Oklahoma). If I could just transfer it to a better state, I wouldn't have much of anything to complain about.

I like suburbs. Nature can be beautiful, but I could never live there. I like internet, air conditioning/heating, close proximity to stores, restaurants, and medical care. Nature is quite frightening - there are scary creatures like bears and mountain lions. Nature also has dangerous insects like mosquitoes and ticks. Unfortunately, they make it into town, as well, but they are MUCH more numerous out in nature. Plus, I flat out don't like being outside. I hate sunshine and heat. Just puts me in a rotten mood. Perhaps temperatures in the 40s and 50s F and overcast skies would be delightful, but nature is rarely like that. Cities, I don't have much experience with. I know they are prone to high crime, so I wouldn't want to live there. I go to the local city to see symphonies sometimes, but it's a bit frightening because it's very dangerous in the city, especially after dark. Suburbs are nice. I always want to live in suburbs.