Can I please have opinions on my Fanfiction idea?

[Princess Rosetta 15]

So basically my story revolves around the fact that the Ponies have been forced into exile from Equestria by a supremely dark force. Ten years later a reformed Sombra (who is now a detective) must investigate the apparent murder of the creator of the ponies world Lauren Faust. I'm basing my story on the famous comic book series Fables. What do you think?

[FangirlForever 19]

I like it! It sounds like it will be very interesting and exciting. You should make it

[DJShy 872]

I can tell that you are trying, but I still don't like the idea from what I am hearing.

 

Now if you could answer a coble questions, I might be able to change my mind.

[Darker 1,351]

Knowing how good the comic book of Fables was, I think this will also be very good. I can see which MLP characters will play the Fables characters, like Sombra will be Bigby, Fluttershy will be Snow White, Rarity will be Beauty (and Spike maybe Beast)...

[Cosmic Nexus 21]

Sombra actually doing good for once. along with exile and murder, seems interesting enough. I sense twists and turns at every paragraph. If this gets made I'd read it.

[Princess Rosetta 15]

Knowing how good the comic book of Fables was, I think this will also be very good. I can see which MLP characters will play the Fables characters, like Sombra will be Bigby, Fluttershy will be Snow White, Rarity will be Beauty (and Spike maybe Beast)...

I'm planning on having five of the six being able transform into humans, however Pinkie can't, so gets sent to the farm!

[Buck Testa 5,503]

So basically my story revolves around the fact that the Ponies have been forced into exile from Equestria by a supremely dark force. Ten years later a reformed Sombra (who is now a detective) must investigate the apparent murder of the creator of the ponies world Lauren Faust. I'm basing my story on the famous comic book series Fables. What do you think?

Alright So Sombra is Big B? Thats cool.

Does that mean the ponies would be glamoured to fit into human society?

Would it just be the mane six or a slew of background ponies?

Would Zecora be making the glamour potions given her affinity for that kind of thing?

Would other races like Griffins also be there?

How would the mane six of changed over the ten years?

Who would of adjusted well and who would not?

What would the apple family do without their farm?

Would Rarity still be a fashion designer?

Would their be a refugee camp for those who cannot glamour like in fable?

Who would take the darkest turn in an urban setting? Who would be unchanged?

who was the killer? Why?

 

 

You got my mind going anyway.

Edited September 5, 2014 by Buck Testa

[Princess Rosetta 15]

Alright So Sombra is Big B? Thats cool.

Does that mean the ponies would be glamoured to fit into human society?

Would it just be the mane six or a slew of background ponies?

Would Zecora be making the glamour potions given her affinity for that kind of thing?

Would other races like Griffins also be there?

How would the mane six of changed over the ten years?

Who would of adjusted well and who would not?

What would the apple family do without their farm?

Would Rarity still be a fashion designer?

Would their be a refugee camp for those who cannot glamour like in fable?

Who would take the darkest turn in an urban setting? Who would be unchanged?

who was the killer? Why?

You got my mind going anyway.

Wow, you know a lot about fables! I've only read legends in exile and animal farm so far, but yes MOST ponies can transform, and the ponies that can't live on the farm, the Mane six (apart from Pinkie who can't transform) have normal jobs, so Twilight works in a public library for example. As for all the creatures, yes, they will be there. So for example Tirek will play the part of Bluebeard, and who is the killer, either Sunset Shimmer or Trixie, I haven't decided! But the end will be similar to book two, with either one attempting to lead an armed insurrection to take back Equestria.

[Buck Testa 5,503]

Wow, you know a lot about fables! I've only read legends in exile and animal farm so far, but yes MOST ponies can transform, and the ponies that can't live on the farm, the Mane six (apart from Pinkie who can't transform) have normal jobs, so Twilight works in a public library for example. As for all the creatures, yes, they will be there. So for example Tirek will play the part of Bluebeard, and who is the killer, either Sunset Shimmer or Trixie, I haven't decided! But the end will be similar to book two, with either one attempting to lead an armed insurrection to take back Equestria.

Alrighty.

 

Why is Tirek helping the ponies? He has shown a lot of distaste for them has he not? Unlike Bluebeard who had himself that buisnessman mentality and that stash of gold, Tirek (in his power hungry way) would seem more of a liability would he not? What is in it for him to help those that he detests?

 

Is Discord present? Would he not basically be like a god in this setting? What is his standing in society?

 

What is your reasoning behind Pinkie being unable to glamour? Does something in her Physiology not allow the potion to work? Is she too eratic to mantain a low profile? How does someone known to have manic bouts of depression and delusional thinking when rejected by her friends react to being seperated from them? Would she crack in the farm? What if they pinkie promised that they would stay together in this strange world but they had to break that promise to stay under cover. I am sure you know how pinkie takes Broken Pinkie promises, and with that in mind would she have to be monitored so she cannot leave the farm? How would Maud take this? Would she go to the farm to support her sister? Would betraying their friend who just wanted to make them smile put a strain on the other five's relationship?

 

Where is Luna, Celestia and Cadence in all this? What roles do they play? If they are in leadership roles what is their relationship with Tirek who plays the part their temporary settings benefactor?

 

Say Sunset Shimmer is the killer? What was her motivation? Why does she want Equestria so much that she would kill its proberbial god to get it? What does she plan to do with it over the teb years she had it? How did she keep power houses like Tirek, Discord, Luna, Celestia, Cadence, Twilight and others from even trying to get their world back?

 

(I love the creative process <3)

[Denim&Venöm 16,517]

I'd actually recommend moving this to the Creative resources section over in Octavia's Hall.  They helped me with some of my story ideas, I'm sure they'd love to do the same for you.