mega thread How are you feeling?

[Sir Hugsalot 9,348]

It's quite a day, especially today's morning was a surprise for me (unfortunately not a positive one this time), but I am hanging in there and hopeful, set on my goals. 

I feel positive about the future in general 

[MadWitchJay 186]

I feel that I have to go to the store and I will do that now.

[Splashee 28,563]

I probably should eat instead of sitting here typing. I am starting to feel sick.

[Ice Princess Silky <3 13,775]

5 hours ago, Sir Spooksalot said:

It's quite a day, especially today's morning was a surprise for me (unfortunately not a positive one this time), but I am hanging in there and hopeful, set on my goals. 

I feel positive about the future in general 

NOT a good surprise?! We need to change that 

Spoiler

*totally not conspiring with friends to change that* 

 

I'm feeling pretty good. Doing some comfy procrastination and enjoying it while it lasts 

[Tao 7,683]

Waking up and not wanting to "adult" on such a nice day....

[Sir Hugsalot 9,348]

43 minutes ago, Princess Silky said:

NOT a good surprise?! We need to change that 

  Hide contents

*totally not conspiring with friends to change that* 

 

I'm feeling pretty good. Doing some comfy procrastination and enjoying it while it lasts 

Oh my, oh my, oh my, that would be so splendid, You're so sweet, my heart is melted 

*big hugs* <3 

[Ice Princess Silky <3 13,775]

41 minutes ago, Tao said:

Waking up and not wanting to "adult" on such a nice day....

I feel like you shouldn't have to adult and instead we can just have some apple cider together 

[Splashee 28,563]

Feeling a headache starting.

[Courageous Thunder Dash 7,824]

Good, since I just finished my workout 

[Pandora 38,015]

better than yesterday

[ZiggWheelsManning 10,196]

Hope to keep the energy going after walking the treadmill.  

[Brony Number 42 10,069]

A little tired. Work has been busy.

[Sir Hugsalot 9,348]

Sleepy as I woke up not so long ago : D But excited for the new day!

[Pandora 38,015]

Today pretty decent I think 

[MadWitchJay 186]

21 hours ago, Splashee said:

I probably should eat instead of sitting here typing. I am starting to feel sick.

Grab a bit of tea. 

[Old Accnt. 3,149]

feeling tired besides that i'm feeling alright

[Ice Princess Silky <3 13,775]

Very sleepy and drained and defeated but also had a dream about a cute little brown owl… little things like that push me to keep going as ridiculous as it sounds. Maybe it’s time to honor a new chapter in my life. Hoping to achieve the steps towards that little by little as soon as I regain the strength … *goes back to sleep*

[Verdant Shy 950]

Today, I'm feeling pretty good. I have binge watched both old and recent MLP SFM G4 content, watched another episode of Friendship is Magic and Breaking Bad.

[Splashee 28,563]

13 minutes ago, Sun Dash Note said:

Friendship is Magic and Breaking Bad

We need a Breaking Bad with Friendship is Magic characters

[Balt 109]

Tired. not wanting to go to work

[Verdant Shy 950]

1 hour ago, Splashee said:

We need a Breaking Bad with Friendship is Magic characters

Oh yes

[ZiggWheelsManning 10,196]

The need to keep moving.  

[MadWitchJay 186]

I feel a bit low energy. Vitamin D might help.

[Verdant Shy 950]

1 hour ago, JuliaMaxOS said:

I feel a bit low energy. Vitamin D might help.

Vitamin D and Ponies!

[They call me Loyalty 1,948]

I was talking with someone over reddit. And I realized how similar we were to each other. And how much I was lying to myself, in order to give this person a false sense of hope about his problems, when he was describing exactly my own issues. But he was right all along. I'm also tired of all this bs.

I am sick and tired of pretending to be someone I am not. Of having to wear a mask in public because I am mentally unstable. I am psychopathic. The reactivity I experience is too extreme. The slightest bit of friction makes me want to break someone's legs.

It was like that since childhood. Causing harm comes naturally to me. The violence is intoxicating and it takes over me in an instant. I want to puke but I keep choking. Last night. I wanted to kill, and my mind started fabricating scenarios and potential aggressors that would give me an excuse to do so.

I cannot function. I am either lethargic, or become a reckless animal. So, I told this person I was sorry for his narcissistic disorder. Because I feel it, too. But I don't have an answer.

It is funny how I was trying to convince myself all along. When in reality I am equally sick of it. Of being broken. If I had the money, I would probably overdose. I do not care anymore, because I've been feeling like an autistic child/compulsive psycho my whole life. And the violence is always there. And it hurts. It also made me realize how much I hate myself. But it makes sense. If you had to work with a broken machine your entire life. You would learn to hate that machine. But in this case the machine is yourself.

Also, he mentioned being tired of feeling like he had to manipulate others in life. It is interesting how narcissistic people will often manipulate others into believing they care, to get something in return. At least I have been honest. I have never lied to someone to get something in return. Holy crap. I just realized I am gonna be forever alone. Hahaha. But at least that is better than hurting innocent people, considering this world is kinda screwed already.

Also, I've learned from the stupidity of my own father. Do not procreate when you are a defective imbecile. So, I promised myself I was gonna put an end to this group of broken people, when I was ten years old. Already a little psycho since childhood. But I love that child. Which is also the reason I become extremely violent when someone threatens me or disrespects my values. It really feels like I am carrying a child with me, all the time. My sensitivity is turned to 200% or I become completely apathetic and see others as objects. Because my psyche is fractured.

And the resentment I feel against my father makes me want to be a better person. Which I will never be, unfortunately. I am already screwed. The game was rigged from the start. Hahaha.

Still, it feels good to be honest with yourself.

Edited October 26, 2022 by They call me Loyalty