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Why are so many guys so bothered if a show has female leads/characters?


Azureth

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(edited)

Now, I can understand if it's stereotypically girly why many guys (and women for the matter) may not be interested in it, but it has amazed me how many guys I have known that have just outright dismissed even watching a show/movie no matter its subject matter if it has a female lead or is primarily composed of females.

For example, I was watching the show "Haven" which has the main protagonist as a female FBI agent and my friend saw it and said "Dude, the main character is a chick, why would you watch it?". I tried to explain to him how good the show was but he found having a female lead was too off putting.

Another time, I forgot what it was but a friend recommended an anime that was good but stipulated with "The only problem is it mostly has girl characters". The first aforementioned friend won't even play video games where you play as a female and makes fun of me for usually making female characters in games such as MMOs and such. Mainly because I just find it more interesting to play as the stereotypical tough guy dude.  This is to say nothing about MLP which just by the name most guys dismiss as "just girly crap".

I don't get it. Now admittedly as a guy I am quite different than other guys. For one, I have never bought into the stereotypical "macho" and "masculine" stuff to much. Also, I for one genuinely love hearing what females have to say. I find it quite intriguing hearing things from a females point of view and find how generally different their interests as well as sameness to men very interesting. I am even part of some female-dominated forums because of it.

Of course, guys have said I am "gay" and the like because of it. It's really disheartening. Again, I can understand guys just not wanting to seek out and actively involve themselves in "female things" but what I don't get is why, so often, if any kind of female thing/activity is brought up so many guys like to joke or make fun of it as if it is something lesser than what men like. Men certainly don't have an issue with women getting involved in "male stuff".

I recently watched a documentary called Missrepresentation which I found quite sad. The prevailing belief is women will go see movies about men but men won't see movies about women.

But sadly from what I have seen being around lots of guys it seems to be quite accurate unfortunately.

I actually LOVE watching movies with tough bad-ass chicks and am tired of the damsel in distress/super macho guy cliche.

Anywhoo, this is just something that's been on my mind and wanted some thoughts and opinions :)

Edited by Azureth
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Its a macho thing. Being viewed as even remotely feminine is seen as a sign of weakness to some guys. Its kind of an ingrained culture thing that has been pretty stubborn and hard to root out.  Its pretty dumb, but there you go.
 

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People are just silly. I certainly don't have a issue with female leads,if i did i wouldn't be on this forums most likely :derp:

 

As far as tv/movies i don't mind either way as long as the movie/show is good.

 

As far as MMO's i prefer to play female if possible because i rather not be unintentionally looking at a males backside for hours on end. :)

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(edited)

(Regarding MLP:FiM, I think the problem is that there're too many female characters, especially during the first seasons, like 90/10, while 50/50 would be more realistic.

But I don't mind at all if the main characters are female, as long as there're secondary male characters to "balance".)

Edited by Blobulle
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Many people just promote the cliche of "This is a man's army!". I'm just using this as a example for my point. 

Specifically men, sometimes have a quite old fashioned and self-preservational way of thinking. Bronies have moved past the gender roles, and specific stereotypes of a man getting a job, and the wife raising children. 

 

To be honest I am a bit communist, I think more of a community, than a single person.

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(edited)

I believe it's because of the exposure of masculine things that men recieve in their life. Since most of them seen stuff that is focused on either a bulky male hero or trying to save a damsel-in-distress, most men unfortunately feel uncomfortable with the idea of female leads.

 

Personally, I love the idea of female leads, because it promotes a healthy message that women aren't weak at all. MLP: FiM is a great example of this.

Edited by Mienshao
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Bronies have moved past the gender roles, and specific stereotypes of a man getting a job, and the wife raising children. 

I have no problem with this family template - in fact, I actively support it. There's nothing wrong with it, and it's been shown through thousands of years of real-life experience to work very well. Nothing has changed so dramatically in the last 100 as to change that. However, I do not support the idea of anyone trying to force their mentality on this subject on someone else.

 

And I harbor no confusion about the distinctions, separations, and uniqueness of the genders - women are built to have children, and men are built for doing all the hard stuff that women can't do when they're pregnant. That's just simple biology.

 

However, I do not appreciate when people act like certain things aren't good for men to do. Seriously, what difference does it make if the main character(s) is/are female? In fact, going with that logic, shouldn't men watch shows with female characters exclusively? Because if you like watching male characters, then you must be gay, right?

 

Of course, don't forget the double-standards in today's society regarding gender roles. Girls can watch shows for boys, but the boys are expected to be disgusted by "girly" shows. Huge double-standard.

 

Tell your friends that they must be gay because they only like looking at men in movies. That should shut them up.


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(edited)
For one, I have never bought into the stereotypical "macho" and "masculine" stuff to much.

 

Unfortunately that's what defines much of popular culture nowadays and there really isn't much we can do to change it.

 

It's a double standard. It's okay for a woman to take on a traditionally male role but if a man does anything remotely feminine or does anything with a woman other than sex it automatically sets off the Gaydar™.

 

As a matter of personal preference, I'd much rather see the two genders treated equally but with respect to their natural differences. I don't mind a girl-power message as long as it does not demean males. The minute I see a "boys drool" or a "throw rocks at them" you can bet your ass the men's rights movement part of me will unleash a shitstorm. I will call out MLP on examples like Snips and Snails or Spikabuse for this reason.

 

It's a very complicated matter on a societal level that I can't lay blame to a single party on, but we can take steps to change it.

 

Along those lines, it's been said that we're actually doing a lot for masculinity, and I can't say it better than Mike Rugnetta:

http://youtu.be/Est3UNs-LIk

Edited by Wind Chaser
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I like female leads if they are done right and not done out of a false representation to enforce stereotypes. When I create characters, most end up being female. I suppose the insecure among us don't like the idea of straying near what they are unable to understand or appreciate.

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Personally I tend to play games and watch movies/shows with male leads for the simple fact that I can usually relate to a male character more on account of being male myself, and because I'm homosexual it's not like I'll watch for the general over-sexualization of female characters in media nowadays.

 

That being said, it's not like I never like shows with female leads. I loved Medium, for example. It's really just a surface-level thing that I can get over really quick if the show is good enough.

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I don't get it either I mean girls aren't usually bothered by watching shows like Regular Show why is it that guys don't want to watch almost the opposite My Little Pony.

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Wait...people are actually touchy about show's with female leads!? This is common!? O.o

 

Yeesh. Either guys in Canada don't really care about what gender the main characters are or I've been living under one hell of a rock!

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(edited)

Interesting responses. I forgot to add, one thing I HATE is when ever I have tried to defend things from a females pov guys will try to shut me and other guys that do the same by saying "Don't be a white knight". I find it extremely sad how a guy taking a woman's side is seen in such a negative light. I have also noticed in other forums when women talk about women issues guys invariably come in and hijack the thread trying to make it their issue or make it seem as if guys have it as bad, if not worse than women. I always end up feeling ashamed to be a man when men come in to topics about "rape culture" and the like. The vast majority of their responses are always so disgraceful.

 

EDIT: One other thing, I recently got a MLP t shirt and my friend said I shouldn't wear it because I could get beat up for it. How sad is that?

Edited by Azureth
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Part of it is because a lot of stories with female leads are a tad insulting and stereotypical but it is also partly a macho insecurity thing. I don't care if something has a male or female characters so long as it is good and MLP meets that requirement for me. This attitude is not nearly as pervasive as it used to be but is still around.

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its an interesting question, and quite frankly impossible to answer in a single post.

part of it has to do with gender stereotypes that have been forced upon our society in the past centuries.

first of all,let me start off with one thing:

 

i do NOT,almost NEVER,watch a show,movie or play a game because i can "relate" to the characters.

i dont watch MLP because i find the characters relatable.

heck,my favourite character is rarity and she is the friggin opposite of me.

i only care about interesting characters.

 

People dont understand that.

Especially younger people and kids enjoy watching stuff where the protagonist is this stereotypized "hero" who goes out to save the world or his loved ones.

Authors write that way because they are too afraid that they will appeal to a smaller target audience.

 

Gender roles have been a part of humanity for such a long time and they have a reason to be there:because they work.

Gender stereotypes, however, have no place in a modern society.

Its these stereotypes that, having been forced into peoples minds, create a negative view of everything that doesnt fit into societys norms.

It creates an almost disturbing behaviour where people look down upon each other just because people enjoy different things,which leads us to MLP.

 

MLP has been considered a bad show for years,the past generations were,that is just a fact.

In general, entertainment for females has always been pretty lackluster.

there are exceptions, of course, but honestly, most of the time it was the "prince saves beautiful princess" crap over and over again.

girls were expected to either play with their own specific toys or do things that are either considered manly or gender-neutral.

Like Disney-Movies, for example.

Noone is gonna laugh at you for liking disney movies, especially now that frozen was such a huge success!

 

again,coming back to MLP.

from an outsiders perspective, it seems like its the same crap all over again and with gender stereotypes still in our society,people view at as the general "inferior" woman entertainment.

 

i however,sincerely believe that stereotypes are getting pushed back more and more and in, say, maybe a few decades, society will finally change its view of what is and isnt considered "manly" or "girly"

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(edited)

This is such a complicated topic.

 

How much is societal and how much is biological? By biological I don't mean child birth, I mean the human species' gift for observation. One of the reasons we were able to grow as a species is because we developed the ability to observe, organize, and categorize the world around us. This includes not only discovering seasons, agriculture, celestial knowledge, and animal husbandry, but also each other. Humans tendency to need to classify has led to defining races, nations, and genders. Basically, anything that makes us different from one another.

 

We know now that environment isn't the only factor in evolution, but our own behaviors actually influence our offspring ... before conception. It's that last bit that if you examine closely then you will start to understand where the diversity among gender roles in cultures comes from. How many became patriarchal, and more importantly how it can be reversed. If we start redefining, or eliminating gender definitions it will biologically pass on through. In short, tolerance can breed tolerance. It will take time, but gender roles will be redefined ... they already are ... at least a little.

My daughters definitely eschew gender stereotypes. More to that, they would likely not exist if I was sexist bigot. My wife would have never dated me if I was.

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(edited for coherence)

Edited by Jeric
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I don't have a problem with it at all. In fact some of my favorite games or movies have female leads. I've never been big into what are considered guy things, and I don't consider myself very macho. I think anyone should be able to like whatever they want.

 

The only time I'd turn away from something with a female lead is when she is very stereotypical or extremely "girly".

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I never understood the whole Macho thing either, but our next door neighbor doesn't mind saying how much macho is the way to go. What an idiot.


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It all depends on the attitude of the character. I don't mind girls who step outside of the norm like Rainbow Dash with her tomboyish personality, but a girl who's like prancy-pretty princess then...no.

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Well, I think the reason why guys won't watch shows and movies and the such with female leads is because of partially the fact that they don't want to be seen watching such a show/movie because they think they may be thought of as girly, which is due to the whole gender sterotypes crap and how men are expected to be macho masculine blah blah blah, you know gender stereotypes I assume.

 

They may also not watch it due to thinking it may end up being girly, this typically isn't true most of the time, but it still plays into the whole thing.

 

Then there could be that they feel it won't be as relatable, which could be considered part of thinking it may be girly, because guys typically can't relate to girly stuff, because well, they're not girls, especially the "macho masculine" men who wouldn't dare defy their masculinity due to the fact that society would scold them forever.

 

The reason girls are ok with watching male leads is probably mainly because they don't usually have to worry about being judged for it or anything, I mean females aren't typically called lesbians for watching a guy lead, but society will turn on a guy watching a show with a girl lead and call him "gay" and crap at the drop of a hat. 

 

That and I guess since the majority of leads in movies and shows are male, they don't have much of a choice.

 

And I don't consider myself masculine or macho or manly or any of that crap at all personally, of course I still don't go out of my way to do anything or say anything that will portray me as such since I don't feel like being mocked for doing so, but regardless. 

 

And I actually like hearing things from a females prospective myself as well many times, and I try to be open about it and understand as best I can. I also like that women typically are kinder than guys are, and more inclined to actually care for the emotional wellbeing of each other than guys. 

 

Of course there are plenty of exceptions on both ends, and women are not perfect in any regard, and there are situations where men are treated in a bad manner and the such. Just as t here are situations that women are treated in a bad manner, it goes both ways, and we just have to keep in mind that both sides have things that need to be attended to, neither side is perfect. 

 

But I am falling off topic. Anyways, hopefully this makes some sort of sense, as I don't always do the best job getting my point across. and this is also from my own perspective and my own opinions as a guy, so something to keep in mind I suppose.

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Because

 

a. As people say, it is a macho thing

b. Some people are just sexist, and think girls are suppose too only do certain things.

c. People would find things just too girly and well just don't have it appeal them (without being the other two cases I mention.)

 

As for me, yeah it just depends on what happens on the show or what ever. It just point of interest. If it has nothing of my interest, I really wouldn't bother with it.

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(edited)

It all depends on the attitude of the character. I don't mind girls who step outside of the norm like Rainbow Dash with her tomboyish personality, but a girl who's like prancy-pretty princess then...no.

Hmm...How do you feel about Rarity?

 

Well, I think the reason why guys won't watch shows and movies and the such with female leads is because of partially the fact that they don't want to be seen watching such a show/movie because they think they may be thought of as girly, which is due to the whole gender sterotypes crap and how men are expected to be macho masculine blah blah blah, you know gender stereotypes I assume.

 

They may also not watch it due to thinking it may end up being girly, this typically isn't true most of the time, but it still plays into the whole thing.

 

Then there could be that they feel it won't be as relatable, which could be considered part of thinking it may be girly, because guys typically can't relate to girly stuff, because well, they're not girls, especially the "macho masculine" men who wouldn't dare defy their masculinity due to the fact that society would scold them forever.

 

The reason girls are ok with watching male leads is probably mainly because they don't usually have to worry about being judged for it or anything, I mean females aren't typically called lesbians for watching a guy lead, but society will turn on a guy watching a show with a girl lead and call him "gay" and crap at the drop of a hat. 

 

That and I guess since the majority of leads in movies and shows are male, they don't have much of a choice.

 

And I don't consider myself masculine or macho or manly or any of that crap at all personally, of course I still don't go out of my way to do anything or say anything that will portray me as such since I don't feel like being mocked for doing so, but regardless. 

 

And I actually like hearing things from a females prospective myself as well many times, and I try to be open about it and understand as best I can. I also like that women typically are kinder than guys are, and more inclined to actually care for the emotional wellbeing of each other than guys. 

 

Of course there are plenty of exceptions on both ends, and women are not perfect in any regard, and there are situations where men are treated in a bad manner and the such. Just as t here are situations that women are treated in a bad manner, it goes both ways, and we just have to keep in mind that both sides have things that need to be attended to, neither side is perfect. 

 

But I am falling off topic. Anyways, hopefully this makes some sort of sense, as I don't always do the best job getting my point across. and this is also from my own perspective and my own opinions as a guy, so something to keep in mind I suppose.

 

Yeah, I totally understand this. Especially about the women being more inclined to care and such. While of course there are bad women, I really don't understand why so many men have a hard time acknowledging when other men behave badly or when generally men are worse at something. There was a thread on another forum that talked about car insurance and lots of the men were complaining how unfair it is guys have to pay more, yet study after study has shown that men are generally worse drivers and cause the most wrecks. Yet the guys kept trying to argue against it and some pulled up some obscure and shady "statistics" trying to say women are worse than men. Not to mention I hear lots of "women driver" jokes.

Edited by Azureth
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@@Azureth,

 

I don't mind her. She's a balance, which is what I really like about her. She can act like a princess, but also like a soldier.  

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Hmm...How do you feel about Rarity?

 

 

Yeah, I totally understand this. Especially about the women being more inclined to care and such. While of course there are bad women, I really don't understand why so many men have a hard time acknowledging when other men behave badly or when generally men are worse at something. There was a thread on another forum that talked about car insurance and lots of the men were complaining how unfair it is guys have to pay more, yet study after study has shown that men are generally worse drivers and cause the most wrecks. Yet the guys kept trying to argue against it and some pulled up some obscure and shady "statistics" trying to say women are worse than men. Not to mention I hear lots of "women driver" jokes.

Yeah, I mean there are bad women, and I know plenty, especially some radical feminists who just like to go around like "DER HUR GIRLS RULE BOYS DROOL"(Sorry I really hate that saying... So freaking sexist, but because it's women nobody gives a crap.) 

 

I think there are plenty on both sides though, plenty of annoying women, and annoying men. 

 

As for why men have a harder time saying they are worse at something, i assume it has to do with the fact that men are typically more prideful and competitive naturally, i mean even I myself can be quite competitive, but I do try and put that feeling aside as best as I can when trying to have a logical discussion such as this.

 

There are things that women do worse, and things men do worse, things harder for women, and things harder for men, I just think that people need to realize that there are good and bad things on both sides, ups and downs about both, and not think either has it worse, or are worse or anything, but that we need to work on both sides of the spectrum. 

 

And as for the car insurance thing, I suppose there is some logic behind it being more expensive, but at the same time I could see how it could be considered unfair. I'm a bit neutral on how I feel about that in particular.

 

Regardless trying to lie about statistics to prove a point is to prove no point at all. 

 

I am not really that well educated on the subject, so am not really fit to debate it.

 

Plus we are kind of straying a bit from the original topic, I do enjoy the discussion though, if you want to you can PM me or something I guess and we can continue discussing things if you wish, I like to be able to discuss this sort of thing sometimes especially when it doesn't involve any hatefulness behind it, and the such.

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