Post A Quote From Your Day, Without Any Context.

[Denim&Venöm 21,095]

"Slayer is my favourite jazz fusion band." 

[Slappy Bird 160]

"Did you microwave a grape?"

[Samurai Equine 56,934]

I tried so hard to avoid accidentally cutting myself that I ended up getting a splinter instead.

[Tropical Melody 8,326]

"I'll take an embarrassing poop over carbon monoxide poisoning any day."

 

[Otaku-sempai 784]

"What really is a Moon-beam anyway? Now a lead pipe to the shins? That's just reliable baby." 

[TheSpookyofPones 6,556]

"STOP REDESIGNING YOUR OCS! It's eating you up inside, I know, but you have to stop!"

"NEVERRRR!"

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

That’s the second time that happened today.

[Tropical Melody 8,326]

"What was their power source?"

"That's a very good question."

"I tell you, if he says dilithium crystals I'm going to lose my sh... "

 

[Denim&Venöm 21,095]

"Boy golly gosh fuck that." 

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

How does a baking soda volcano win a poetry contest?

[Tropical Melody 8,326]

"Watch out for flying cows if you want to take a pee on the train tracks."

 

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

You would rather be cooked than take a bath?

[Tropical Melody 8,326]

"Becasue I don't want to wait two to three working days for it. I want it in my hands now. Like three seconds ago! An hour ago!"

 

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

I almost squished my toe.

[Denim&Venöm 21,095]

 "Seriously?"

*punt*

 "Get the Frick out of here!"

*clunk*

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

You wasted my valuable time just to get you an ice cream cone?!

[Tropical Melody 8,326]

"... in which case you can go along with your blacklight, and it shows up - like a turd in a punchbowl, as they say ... and bam! Boom!There it is - get out the soapy water, hose her down, look for the bubbles, and move on with your life ... that's the only advice I can give you guys."

 

[Denim&Venöm 21,095]

 "Jevudan My Little Pony'd the fk out of those monsters."

[Tao 9,576]

""Um,  don't I get a side of free fires with that?" 

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

That house still has Halloween decorations out.

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

I hate it when the ad is longer than the video I’m trying to watch.

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

I’m gonna pretend I know what that means.

[Tao 9,576]

50 minutes ago, Snoopy Fan said:

I’m gonna pretend I know what that means.

FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT!!! 

[Snoopy Fan 11,928]

I don’t need help, I need a miracle.

[Tropical Melody 8,326]

"It's one of those touristy places, screaming kids and dogshit."