Stupid "Torture" Ideas?

[Midnight Dragon 264]

So, I found one of my old crack fics, and decided I wanna finish it. With that being said...I need some really, really stupid torture ideas.

For example...one of the suggestions I got years ago involved a bendy straw. And the "victim" was really sarcastic about it. Yes, THAT'S the level of stupidity I'm asking for.

So...ideas?

[Silverhoof 2,844]

Letting snails crawl over the victim leaving a yucky slime trail.

 

Burning the victim's comic book collection, one at a time. "NO! Not Archie #301! anything but that!"

[Champion RD92 8,658]

um...make them listen to justin bieber nonstop for 24 hours

[Scootalove 10,689]

Having the victim watch as their favorite wax action figures melt in a hot cheese fondue pot.

Edited February 8, 2014 by Scootalove

[RunningWolf251 5]

Have a character stare at them for a really long period of time and say nothing at all.

 

Paint a wall, let it dry, set them in front of it, and make them wait until the paint is wet again.

 

Shine laser pointers in their eyes.

 

Break all of their favorite cd's or games one by one.

 

Lots and lots of hair gel and a really bad makeup artist.

 

Could do like the bad nose job doctor from Spaceballs and threaten to reverse a muzzle job they had in the past and had kept secret up until that point.

[Retro*Derpy 3,185]

Dye their hair to their least favorite color.

Edited February 9, 2014 by Retro*Derpy

[GhostPony750 959]

tickle to death

papercut

Make them eat their least favorite food

[N.W. 3,619]

This is not so much stupid as brilliant 

[SwigglySwiggly 358]

This one calls credit for FPS Russia... the victim is tied up with seeds on their crotch and a chicken is put there to feed on the seeds.

[Gravelord Neat-O 305]

tie them up on a chair, get a squirt gun, put it over their head and slowly squeeze the trigger, the dripping will drive them mad!!!!

Edited February 8, 2014 by Beelzebub

[Static Electricity 729]

Have them sit in a wooden tub filled with milk and honey. Feed them only milk and bread :>

 

Do not let them get up, ever. Leave them in the sun, preferably.

 

Wait for results >:>

[GameytheGeemer 147]

One good one to get that out of my system before the real idiotic one, read at your own risk, but bear in mind this is one of my dumber torture routines already

 

 

Tied up naked on the side of a wall, their entire body weight supported by duct tape, while they are covered in a sweet and sticky substance. As they will be outside, the honey, the best substance, Syrup is an acceptable substitute, will dry and get almost like glue.

 

And then the ants come. Ants, thousands upon thousands of them crawl onto the victims body and start biting him. This won't be so bad at first, but the agony has only just begun. As the ants are stuck to the drying honey, more predatorial animals will come along to eat the ants off of their skin. Think Spiders and the like, and then they will eventually get stuck from devouring each other and the thousands of ants on the victims skin.

 

And then birds come and eat them, pecking their skin raw, leaving the scent of blood in the air.

 

By this point, the duct tape will have come loose, allowing them limited movement, but the honey will still keep them from being able to move too much, as days in the sun does that to a sugary antibacterial agent.

 

So, bloody and relatively immobile in the woods, they will attract bigger animals to eat them.

 

 

 

Now for the real one

 

rubbed with a pillow until they are unable to feel their shirts anymore.

[Something Floaty 1,334]

Being forced to watch Mike and Molly.

 

Licked to death by very friendly dogs

 

Nerf gun firing squad

[Little Lizards 91]

Say words that annoy them

or 

Rub foam against pieces of foam for an annoying noise

[Castle Bleck 19,364]

According to Jim Carrey:

[Edgeworth1001 648]

Give them a Rubik Cube.

 

Or better yet, force them to watch a endless marathon of Batman and Robin.

[)O( Scarlet )O( 1,259]

have a whole bunch of night and blood elves in their underwear do a stupid dance on mail boxes infront for them

[Bastion 414]

force them to watch every DSP gaming video.

[RunningWolf251 5]

Strap a shock collar to their neck or each of their legs and play loud, annoying music to set it off. Watch, point, and laugh as they dance from the shocks. Classic.

[Megas 27,654]

Have the victim play the video game Ride to Hell, cause nothing else lives up to its name better than that

[Something Floaty 1,334]

A Nicolas Cage movie marathon, with each film being shown at least three times, with The Wicker Man as the first and last one viewed. You can eliminate The Rock, though, because despite his typically awful acting, and the surprising overacting of some otherwise excellent people in that movie (Sean Connery, Tony Todd,), it's still entertaining enough to overcome it's flaws, unlike the rest of his movies, which are either entertaining in short doses because of the flaws, or just flawed to the point of nauseating unwatchability. 

[Celtore 2,770]

Forcing the victim to walk barefoot... across a bed of assorted 1x1 lego blocks! (It's the extreme version of firewalking)

Edited February 9, 2014 by Celtore

[Something Floaty 1,334]

Forcing the victim to walk barefoot... across a bed of assorted 1x1 lego blocks! (It's the extreme version of firewalking)

 

I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. I think leaving LEGOs on the floor in the dark is prohibited by the Geneva Conventions. 

[sakeshi 28]

Tickle every sensitive spot on their body with feathers, non-stop.

[caramba2654 602]

Give them wet chocolate.

 

(Seriously, wet chocolate is the worst thing ever)

 

Oh, and making them play Amnesia with an Occulus Rift.

Edited February 9, 2014 by caramba2654