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Raskolnikov

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Everything posted by Raskolnikov

  1. LOL, if this is what I think it is, I did go a little bit "um. WOT. wot r u doing". But I didn't think you were being malicious.
  2. Dunno. Exhausted by displays of anger being a trigger. Petition to remove that emotion from everyone forever please.
  3. Somehow the sunset air actually brings out the life in this... this place. It was nice. I think I need to plan a lone excursion out sometime maybe next week, I need to recalibrate but unconsciously I seem to still worry too much about how others are enjoying something to really relax for myself being out and actually internally map new areas. :\
  4. These look like cast characters from Finding Nemo...
  5. I'm waiting for the summer sale before buying Deltarune! Kindly asking people not to post any spoilers as I've not played the new chapters yet :] (not that anyone has, people have been respectful which I've appreciated!) Just had a phone call from the counsellor I contacted and wow, I'm already getting a lot of green flags from her. The previous counsellors I contacted seemed almost defensive and alarmed when I tried asking questions about how they conduct their practice before (hey, I should know if we're compatible or not! I want to get what I'm paying for, y'know?), and the one I went with was just "cool let's start" while this one is gonna send me a followup email with info and asked to read it and wait a few days to let the email sink in before deciding whether we're a good fit or not, which came across as very professional in comparison. I'll wait for the email first but from her answers to my questions I got only good vibes.
  6. Hungry, it's summer so my 1. inability to eat most foods in the morning, 2. inability to eat in hot weather, 3. inability to eat when reaaaally hungry (?!?) are grouping up to kick my ass :s Going to have to eat... very... very... slowly.
  7. "There's a fallen statue in the wilderness It has found its way to your dreams Haunting the waking hours, In nights' color with eyes like rain The shades beseech you, My love increases you And summer freezes you into me The cold fire suits you A pale tortured blue, blistering through I will raise a statue in the wilderness It will find its way to your dreams This will haunt you forever, In nights' color with eyes like rain Yet I collect the stars you wept, Keeping them as my own To be lost in your eyes, For all the sadness that we kept And I fail to realize it's you The cold fire suits you, A pale tortured blue, blistering through When there's peace within myself And everything else A pale tortured blue, blistering through."
  8. I have no idea why he didn't just say something first if he had a problem... Man I'm in no state to go to work, meant to get MORE sleep tonight but got less... x_x freaking summer man...
  9. It's too hot to stay asleep even with a fan blowing right at me at full speed... if hot weather has no haters left assume I am dead and gone :|
  10. Depends on the community and what act(s) 'smeared' your reputation. Some groups are just needlessly punitive and unforgiving, others are wise to shun someone for disgraceful acts - and it depends on the time passed, too. If it's something serious I would wait a gooooood long while before trying to re-engage with people who got the bad impression about you as they will need to recalibrate and process their emotions regarding whatever it is that ruined your reputation for them. And sometimes you really fucked up and you may just have to move on, and that's only fair to those people if trust was broken irreparably. It doesn't mean you're forever unforgivable, I don't think that's true for even the worst people you can think of, but it's best to move on from harmed parties. tl;dr depends on the community and the perceived offences. Some are more lenient than others.
  11. Honestly I'd forget him and just focus on the recorded footage. If he's uninvolved he will pacify himself once equilibrium is established with next door, idk what some random is on about. *shrug*
  12. Double post whoops but I'll just vent in here, I'll be alright, this comes up occasionally due to past crap unfortunately. But it can be really, really hard having very little socialisation skills sometimes... I feel like I can only have 1 on 1 conversations with people, otherwise I get (understandably really) overshadowed by others because I'm still catching up on social skills and I tend to feel guarded around new people, especially in sudden encounters. It makes me a while to trust others but by the time I do feel more comfortable it seems I've already established myself in their minds as the quiet unsociable workaholic so people don't engage... perhaps people feel like I feel better being left alone, but actually it sucks feeling ignored and left behind. And those feelings get worse in encounters that aren't 1 on 1. Some of this is 100% my own fault, I try to challenge my skittishness but today is not one of those days I feel able to deal with those feelings... it's unfortunately a very old emotional wound. I don't feel so bad about it these days, not usually, but sometimes stuff just triggers old feelings back.
  13. If you make something outta them feel free to post in the 'last thing you ate' topic respect!
  14. Me: I don't care about looking mentally ill to people anymore!!!! People can think what they WANT!! Fuck em!! (Normal, friendly) neighbour, to @Acinonyx): Hi Me: Socialising is hard man... Gets to me at times like this :[
  15. Don't beat yourself up about it, socialising as an adult is hard in general... even if you're really trying, a lot of the time people are too preoccupied with their lives to cultivate new friendships. Source: have had multiple people complain to me that they hate when people never initiate contact first to talk or hang out... then do the same thing to me and I'm the one left in the position they complained about being in. Huh??? Just keep trying - if you have time and/or money, starting new hobbies that involve other people can be a good way to meet new people and you will have something in common that isn't sharing a workspace
  16. It's cool it's helping you sleep Since you brought it up I'm just gonna mention to make sure they don't overprescribe you benzos - my sister's mum was prescribed benzos for, uh, a veryyy long period of time for grief and anxiety, like we're talking years here AFAIK, and it turns out they get very addicting in the long term and she's been REALLY struggling coming off of them for a loooong while... but the psychiatrist didn't care about how much she was casually prescribing and was casually committing medical malpractice. This was not in England though so your psychiatrist may be normal and has already explained all this like a normal person, just making sure you're aware cos some practitioners are fucking reckless!!
  17. Worse. We are tenants. Living next to Codename: Birdfucker. Our hired mercenaries have delivered intel of at least one other enemy of the aggressor and of the aggressor's regular, drunken whereabouts. A man who makes many enemies out of his neighbours is... unwise. WAIT SHIT IS THAT SKETCH Forget anything about child soldiers that's a war crime
  18. Hired mercenaries certainly wasn't on my Bingo card today...
  19. The escalation has heralded a new phase of the offensive against the avian aggressor. ...child soldiers?
  20. A swift blow has been struck against the enemy. The magnitude of our amplification arsenal will make him bow down to his knees for mercy, but he will find none in this space.
  21. I thought you're Bairro, but turns out you're Lord Byron :0
  22. I hate the expectation that you are available 24/7 just because you have a phone. I've turned Seen statuses on messages off because sometimes I want to be given space to think of what to say without the pressure of not making someone feel like you're ignoring them - I frequently experience executive dysfunction regarding answering to people promptly... (this goes for here too so please don't take it personally if I take a while, sometimes it happens and socialising seems impossible )
  23. Your brother POV when the cops It was even funnier considering he tried to claim we possess drugs and you just told them "feel free to check" but they didn't even seem to believe him because of what a beer-bellied wifebeater look he had that night
  24. When @Acinonyx's brother was escorted into the police car after causing a domestic in front of the kids (including his own)... beautiful little moments you cherish forever
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