Does MLP make you wish the world/you could be more (physically) affectionate?

[GuillermoGage 246]

... The amount of affection, including physical affection.. seems to be greater than that of real life. Even by little kid cartoon standards, it seems higher.

 

Well, I'm not of the "Equestria is a utopia/I'd rather live in Equestria/yes misanthropy, ponies instead" mindset. I don't think of my fannishness with that level of Serious Business.

 

But watching some moments on our special show makes me want to pursue being physically affectionate once I get out into the world and start making friends.

 

... like, sometimes I wish that nuzzling and hand-holding could be things that you could do with anyone that you became vagueky acquainted with.

 

Well, I don't watch many other cartoons, but it just seems t me that most other cartoons and fictional programming, while they do idealize relationships and simplify how easy it is to get affection going... that they just aren't on the level f My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

 

Maybe it is because theh have more comedy... stuff like SpongeBob and such. That's a show where almost everyone is non-human, but the characters are naive or cold and distant in human-like cynical ways for the sake of comedy. Or more action and stuff.

 

Littlest Pet Shop has a bit more affection, but that has a Looney Tunes vibe of the pets and animals imitating cartoony depictions of human romance.

 

So yeah... seeing how affectionate the ponies are makes me want to be affectionate.

 

Hopefully all that above stuff doesn't aound too bloggish or personal and you can sound off on how the show makes you feel in that regard, if it influences or reflects your take on affection.

Edited December 7, 2014 by GuillermoGage

[SFyr 1,982]

I think it's perfectly understandable, though personally I feel it's more about the sense of closeness and acceptance that is just lacking in today's society. We're encouraged to be leery and suspicious of each other, and mindful of ourselves. It's safer that way, and suites our mindset more often.

However, it also damages our potential for a sense of community with each other, where things like touch/nuzzling/etc or even just genuinely showing you care about someone or support them is often met with criticism and negativity. In MLP, ponys want to get along and learn to be better friends. Trusting people is universally a good thing (more or less). Here, we go into life often thinking that trusting people will just allow them to take advantage of us, or be seen as a sign of weakness, or ultimately just do harm.

Talk to strangers on the street? MLP says everyone is a potential friend. RL says they may hurt/kidnap/mug you.

Just hugging someone you don't know can be seen as weird unless you know how to get around potential social stigmas, or set up the situation well.

 

Short verson: I think our world is raised to be too careful, but I can understand the want for more affection and closeness with people--I don't like the former being somewhat necessary nowadays.

[Silver Letter 1,831]

Sometimes in fiction, relationships between characters are allowed to bloom in ways that real life societies and customs really don't allow. With MLP, we're dealing with a far more open world. It's really superior in that regard. Of course, an open world with a greater grasp of friendship and mutual affection is what the world should strive for.

[They call me Loyalty 1,941]

Eventhough things have been pretty hard for me, without an actual family. I think we will get there pretty soon.

It's all about frequency. Lower frequencies tend to be repulsive, fear driven.
There isn't much realization about any process taking place within. The ammount of emotional feedback is barealy nothing, since the speed of rotation is rather low. This means there isn't much light on circulation, or it has gone stagnant, usually meaning lack of light connectivity. The subject is bound to previous stored experiences, in order to idenity his/her current environment. Stuck within past, scared about the future. But never living the now. This sets an agressive reaction towords the unknown, most of the times. Emulating perception, with self-acquired knowledge, which is far away from wisdom and emotion.

For human beings, almost everything is unknown. But as the frequency goes up, the consciousness is enhanced, and so does Life. So wisdom is finally achieved, as it's born from love. As it happened on many ancient civilization. On those times, both Emotion and Mind were equals. And people were born knowing already.

 

Throughout history, the Femenine side was diminished, and so it happened with Love, as a direct result. Earth grew colder and many things got messy. Which is why some of us are here now. To stop humankind from going love-less.

There are some beings throughout this galaxy,  so devoid of love, that they've actually lost all emotional capability, they're like husk without sexuality. They look all the same, they're cold minded. They barely have any distinctive trait from each other. Their eyes are wide and black, lacking any kind of light. Subject to clonation, to keep this concsiouss frecuency alive. Still devoid of any life.

Sad creatures, technologicaly imprisoned without any form of transcendence.

There other beings, that look like elves. Beautiful nature, artistic an passionate, far advanced beyond "technology" Able to transcend dimensions by sheer will. Loving and caring for all beings. With love, you're not stuck in your body. Because as love, you're actually the inner force of Creation. Which is infinity.

What is life? Do you think a sustainable organic body is enough for life to take place? No, it's not enough. You could be conscious, and still be dead inside, without love.

 

Where is love? It's actually everywhere, open up your heart, and let it shine through.

 

 

Take a deep breath. You're always loved.

[Zygen 6,065]

Dude, I know exactly what you mean. 

 

There have been many many times that I'll be watching MLP, and i'll start thinking, "Why can't I have that? Why can't I have those beautiful deep true friendships? Why can't the world in general have those friendships? Why must they be so rare?" and all kinds of other deep thinking. Sure MLP is a cartoon, yeah yeah, I know that, i'm not an idiot. But still, why is it that those types of friendships are almost nonexistent it seems? 

 

Seeing those heartwarming moments on MLP are both heartwarming at times for me, but at other times they make me feel so lonely, and so unloved, so unwanted, maybe even jealous. 

 

Especially as a guy, where sometimes even just giving hugs can be considered by some as "gay",  it just seems like those kinds of friendships are so rare, and idk, I just feel like I wish my real friendships could be something closer to that, or just even the world in general. But when I realize it may never be, It's quite saddening to say the least. 

 

Maybe I'm just a wishful thinker for it, but that doesn't really change how I feel sometimes about the whole thing, it's quite true unfortunately that our world can be quite cold at times, as a lot of us are raised to fear others, and look out for only ourselves.

 

Maybe i'm just overly caring about this stuff, or overthinking it, but I do sometimes wish real life friendships were more like those in MLP, because it's just so heartwarming and beautiful to see those friendships, even between a group of fictional ponies. 

 

But yeah, I know exactly what you mean dude, I think the same think basically all the time...

[Rainboom Dash 1,055]

I sometimes wonder if our world could be as good as Equestria, myself.

[Holiday Agnaktor 1,435]

I agree with Zygen. Seeing the show makes want to have close friends like that. But I don't, so I feel lonely... I'm pretty introverted as well, so that doesn't help. That's actually why I joined the forum; I just want to make friends. It (sort of) works... But still... Getting really close friendships in RL is hard. I say hello to pretty much anyone I meet on the streets, and they all just stare at me as if I'm going to mug them or something. It's annoying. I wish people (including me) are more trusting. Plus, in the show, there are close to no jerks. Maybe one or two, but not many. My entire class is composed out of jerks... ;_;

[Sweet Dreams 1,893]

People with Asperger's be like.

 

*not meaning to stereotype or generalise haha*

I think I'm good with the amount of physical contact I have to deal with right now, thank you. xD

Although I wish I was a little more comfortable with it. It's not like I don't like physical affection, it's just that it's overwhelming at times, I guess. So that'd be a big old nope for me.

 

Edited December 7, 2014 by Sweet Dreams

[Arua 13]

I myself dislike uncontrolled human contact. I have nothing against touching or being near people, I jut dislike it when I can't control it/they touch me when I don't want it.

 

Of course this is something I wish to stop and I totally agree with you.

[Osiria 142]

Well, here's a million dollar idea for an app: when you get close to someone, it detects whether he/she is a hugger or a kisser or neither (don't ask me how does it work, just set up your preference in the app, if you both using it, it will know his/her preference and inform you).

 

To answer OP's question, I'm totally cool with hugs or kisses, but I am not usually an offerer unless I know for sure they'd be happy with it. 

Edited December 7, 2014 by Osiria

[GuillermoGage 246]

People with Asperger's be like.

 

*not meaning to stereotype or generalise haha*

I think I'm good with the amount of physical contact I have to deal with right now, thank you. xD

Although I wish I was a little more comfortable with it. It's not like I don't like physical affection, it's just that it's overwhelming at times, I guess. So that'd be a big old nope for me.

 

I have been diagnosed with Asperger's, since age 9 (I was born in late 1990) and reminded by school people again at age 15, but I'm also angry all the time by from having the last several years being deprived of opportunities to make friends... so this "shyness" thing or whatever ends up breaking, into being more and more in disregard.

 

Well, you did say "not meaning to stereotype or generalise haha"

 

"Edited by Sweet Dreams, Today at 4:32 am" four minutes later. Touché.

[Zekromic 1,054]

Well, in my case, I developed an aversion of physical affection because my country is going through a huge moral bankruptcy. Now I see said affections as hypocrite, invasive, obnoxious, time wasters, and as means to stab you in the back. I'm only comfortable of showing and allowing physical affection to a selected few, because they earned emotional affection from me in this dark time of mine. 

[Draxon 214]

I give my friends hugs a lot, but admittedly that's because we've had so much close interaction with each other.  It's taboo to just start hugging everyone you meet, although in some cultures people greet each other with a kiss, so I suppose a big part of it is regional culture.  On that note, the one time I attended a furry convention, there was someone raising money for charity by walking around in a fursuit giving out hugs to everyone (and yes, I did contribute).  I think you'd be hard pressed to find a furry who would turn down a hug, even by a stranger (just be sure to ask them first).

 

A bit of closing advice, don't get into the habit of shaking hands with your friends when you part.  Give them a hug instead, it's much more fulfilling.

[Countess Noodle 607]

After I watch an episode of MLP I always feel like going out and hugging random people and singing(or trying to) Winter Wrap up as I clean my room.

[DubWolf 16,792]

I'm already really affectionate with my special somepony, even if it's just online . I wouldn't really want to be affectionate with anyone else .

Edited December 7, 2014 by SparkWolf

[Zygen 6,065]

I myself dislike uncontrolled human contact. I have nothing against touching or being near people, I jut dislike it when I can't control it/they touch me when I don't want it.

 

Of course this is something I wish to stop and I totally agree with you.

I don't really think that people should just be allowed to touch people whenever. Maybe have it be more acceptable between friends or something, but even then i wouldn't even really consider it something required.

 

Personally i'd just like to see more emotional connection, not necessarily physical connection, but physical connection is a possible part of said emotional connections, if that makes any sense.

 

On the other hand though, random hugs are awesome in a way, depending on the situation.

Well, here's a million dollar idea for an app: when you get close to someone, it detects whether he/she is a hugger or a kisser or neither (don't ask me how does it work, just set up your preference in the app, if you both using it, it will know his/her preference and inform you).

 

To answer OP's question, I'm totally cool with hugs or kisses, but I am not usually an offerer unless I know for sure they'd be happy with it. 

Interesting idea, but idk how that would work, and would be kinda weird in a sense xD. Be much easier to just ask them probably. 

 

And yeah, I'm not usually an offerer myself unless I know they would like them. I also don't really give kisses, I find that to be a little be to much in most cases, besides family, otherwise it's just odd to me. But I do love hugs, although I can also be really awkward with giving hugs for some reason, even if I do like them, which I think may give people the impression at times I don't like hugs or something, when in reality I just suck at them.

After I watch an episode of MLP I always feel like going out and hugging random people and singing(or trying to) Winter Wrap up as I clean my room.

I get the exact same type of feeling sometimes myself .

[Wind Chaser 4,768]

I could imagine it happening a lot more among this community when it convenes in real life. It conveys a sense of trust only friends and family with deep emotional relationships would have. It seems we have the right kinds of personalities in this fandom for that.

 

People with Asperger's be like.

 

*not meaning to stereotype or generalise haha*

I think I'm good with the amount of physical contact I have to deal with right now, thank you. xD

Although I wish I was a little more comfortable with it. It's not like I don't like physical affection, it's just that it's overwhelming at times, I guess. So that'd be a big old nope for me.

 

I can relate to that. Sometimes, I reject it or feel completely awkward about something like a hug, but deep down inside I actually want it. It's a strange, conflicted feeling, and I feel like it keeps me from enjoying these kinds of things. It's kind of sad not being able to fully enjoy it. I feel as if it's a notion that we could overcome if only there were more opportunities for physical affection in real life.

 

As a male, let me tell you it's much tougher seeing girls being physically affectionate all the time. I don't even know if the gender double-standard on this has somehow worked its way into my subconsciousness and contributed to the perceived awkwardness of hugging to me.

[SparklingSwirls 21,272]

I like being affectionate with my special somepony , but I wouldn't want to be that affectionate with anyone else. Still, I kinda wish that more people in real life would want to hug me, since I feel like all my hugs are online only :c

[Solid 1,327]

I don't see this as an issue since my friends and I give eachother fist bumps (a.k.a. Brohoof) all the time. I also often sneak up from behind (or from the front) and "assassinate" them or grab them in a chokehold, well that's probably just me, and of course we are just screwing around, nothing too serious. XD

 

In terms of strangers I give them some good handshakes.

 

Overall this isn't really an issue for me. But if you're referring to those "affections" that are considered by society to be "romantic," then I understand.

Edited December 8, 2014 by Solid Scorpion

[Justin_Case001 4,861]

Dude, I know exactly what you mean. 

 

There have been many many times that I'll be watching MLP, and i'll start thinking, "Why can't I have that? Why can't I have those beautiful deep true friendships? Why can't the world in general have those friendships? Why must they be so rare?" and all kinds of other deep thinking. Sure MLP is a cartoon, yeah yeah, I know that, i'm not an idiot. But still, why is it that those types of friendships are almost nonexistent it seems? 

 

Seeing those heartwarming moments on MLP are both heartwarming at times for me, but at other times they make me feel so lonely, and so unloved, so unwanted, maybe even jealous. 

 

Especially as a guy, where sometimes even just giving hugs can be considered by some as "gay",  it just seems like those kinds of friendships are so rare, and idk, I just feel like I wish my real friendships could be something closer to that, or just even the world in general. But when I realize it may never be, It's quite saddening to say the least. 

 

Maybe I'm just a wishful thinker for it, but that doesn't really change how I feel sometimes about the whole thing, it's quite true unfortunately that our world can be quite cold at times, as a lot of us are raised to fear others, and look out for only ourselves.

 

Maybe i'm just overly caring about this stuff, or overthinking it, but I do sometimes wish real life friendships were more like those in MLP, because it's just so heartwarming and beautiful to see those friendships, even between a group of fictional ponies. 

 

But yeah, I know exactly what you mean dude, I think the same think basically all the time...

This is definitely me as well.

 

I can relate to that. Sometimes, I reject it or feel completely awkward about something like a hug, but deep down inside I actually want it. It's a strange, conflicted feeling, and I feel like it keeps me from enjoying these kinds of things. It's kind of sad not being able to fully enjoy it. I feel as if it's a notion that we could overcome if only there were more opportunities for physical affection in real life.

 

As a male, let me tell you it's much tougher seeing girls being physically affectionate all the time. I don't even know if the gender double-standard on this has somehow worked its way into my subconsciousness and contributed to the perceived awkwardness of hugging to me.

I know what you mean.  I often feel like this, too.

 

 

I wish people (including me) are more trusting. Plus, in the show, there are close to no jerks. Maybe one or two, but not many.

I'd say there's maybe more than one or two, but thing is, in an ideal world like Equestria, even when there are jerks, they're basically...honest about it.  It's like, if somepony's a jerk, you don't have to let them ruin your life.  Hmm.  What I am trying to say here?  Basically...even though there's a mean pony, they're not dangerous.  If somepony's mean to, say, Pinkie, they're not gonna steal her identity, rape her, beat her, and leave her for dead.  You're much safer in Equestria.  The only time that there's really any danger is in the premieres and finales when the big baddies show up, and they just get their asses harmonized anyway.  If jerks irl could just be harmless jerks, then it wouldn't really be a problem.  Just ignore them.  But the problem is the fact that we have to suspect everyone in order to protect ourselves.  And it often destroys possiblities for real connection.  I don't know if there's anything to be done about that.

 

Anyway, those posts by Zygen and North Wind said it all.  Not a whole lot for me to add.  I've never really been the physically affectionate type with my family or friends, but at the same time it's something I wish I could have.  My family and I have always had a great relationship, but we've never been touchy-feely at all.  It would just feel awkward.  But we never needed to be.  We're fine the way we are.  Sometimes I wish I could be a bit more physically affectionate with my friends, but not a one of them would be comfortable with it.  We're all very close, but again, just not the touchy-feely kind.  A hug would really weird out most of my friends.  And that's okay.  Not everyone needs to enjoy physical contact.  They don't have an irrational or specific aversion to it.  They've just never really had much physical contact, and don't really know what to make of it or how to deal with it.  We're like a bunch of Sheldon Coopers, but, you know, not so OCD and bat crap crazy.  I've just never had anyone in my life I could really be affectionate with.  But the thing of it is, deep down I'm probably the most affectionate, passionate, not to mention romantic, person in the world.  I want this connection so badly that it tears me apart every day.  I don't need to be physically, or even emotionally affectionate with friends to be fullfilled.  I only need one person.  Just my special somepony.  But I've always been alone, and probably always will be.

 

Like you, Zygen, I look longingly at the heartwarming moments on the show, and desperately wish I could have that.  Why can't our days be filled with those kinds of beautiful, caring feelings?  You want to know something stupid and embarassing?  I actually considered volunteering for the Big Brothers Big Sisters program (as an older brother, of course) in hopes that I might forge a meaningful relationship that...um...might have one day led to a moment like...uh...you know...Rainbow and Scootaloo in Sleepless.  God, I feel like an idiot just writing that.  But the fact is that after attending an orientation meeting, I realized that the program is not for me at all.  I'm not the right kind of person for it.  In fact, I'd go so far as to say it would be irresponsible of me to do it.

 

*sigh*

 

Some days I feel a shred of hope, but most days I just and stare with a sinking feeling in my chest, wondering how it could have ended up like this.

Edited December 12, 2014 by Justin_Case001

[Petrus 696]

I sometimes wonder if our world could be as good as Equestria, myself.

but It isn't... *tear rolls down cheek*

[NavelColt 22,877]

The world could stand to be a lot more affectionate, yeah. Less wars, less crime, less bullshit. As for me though, while I love cute things, I'm just not very good or comfortable with displaying affection in-person x) Don't think I could ever get used to it, even if society was far more welcoming of it. The life of an introvert.

[Guest]

 

 

A bit of closing advice, don't get into the habit of shaking hands with your friends when you part.  Give them a hug instead, it's much more fulfilling.

 

I could imagine giving a girl a hug to say goodbye, but not really a boy. Well.. I guess it depends on the sitiuation and the context. But I usually say goodbye to my boys with a bro-hug instead. 

[Giygas 40]

Dude, I know exactly what you mean. 

 

There have been many many times that I'll be watching MLP, and i'll start thinking, "Why can't I have that? Why can't I have those beautiful deep true friendships? Why can't the world in general have those friendships? Why must they be so rare?" and all kinds of other deep thinking. Sure MLP is a cartoon, yeah yeah, I know that, i'm not an idiot. But still, why is it that those types of friendships are almost nonexistent it seems? 

 

...

 

Maybe i'm just overly caring about this stuff, or overthinking it, but I do sometimes wish real life friendships were more like those in MLP, because it's just so heartwarming and beautiful to see those friendships, even between a group of fictional ponies. 

 

But yeah, I know exactly what you mean dude, I think the same thin basically all the time...

 

Why do you think these friendships are so rare? I thought it was commonplace for girls because there's more emphasis on sharing and identifying feelings in others and themselves.

 

I understand what you're saying though. I wish I could articulate my own feelings properly because I see the value in having a proper interpersonal relationship with somebody, and watching MLP has helped me re-evaluate the relationships of those around me compared to the ones that I have for the characters.   

Edited December 11, 2014 by Giygas

[Miles 2,512]

*bump*

---

All my yes.

I think friends should definitely be able to hug more.  Personally I'm a very "huggy" kind of person.  But I do think even if society were more open to physical affection between friends, that certain things should still be left for intimacy between couples.  Hugging is one thing, but nuzzling... well, that's different.  

~ Miles