open Alicorn's Ailment (Retry)

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

(not yet! geez XD)

 

“I trusted them….I believed them….and what did they give me in return? They gave--”

“---you lies and deception, treating you innocently one minute, and then backstabbing you the next. It was the--”

“--most disrespectful thing they’d ever done. Even after all I did for them, they--”

“still thought of you the same way anypony else originally would. Even Celestia mistreated you. Let’s face it--”

“with friends like them--”

“and allies like you, Chrysalis--”

“WHO NEEDS ENEMIES?!”

 

This was it. The final moment. I built up my rage, and let it out with a massive roar of anger, sadness, vengance, and above all else….hatred. I could feel the pain throbbing in my chest, as I screamed and roared in massive pain, as a dark entity began flowing from my body. Dark aura surrounded me, the ground began to shake, the room dimmed...and a pair of white glowing eyes emerged from my chest.

 

"FREEE.....AT.....LAAAAAAAST!" Layol roared, as he pushed himself free, ground cast into small patches of darkness where his hooves perched.

 

 

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

(Just a quick note - you just let me handle some of the detailed action, a'ight?   Just saying he frees himself from Loyal adds no tension to it)

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[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(Ok. I'll just stick to writing the other ponies dialogue.)

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[Loyal Defender 4,111]

(Thank you.)

 

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“Finally...it was getting boring in there! Who has freed me from my tomb?!”

 

Edited March 26, 2018 by Loyal Defender

[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(You're Welcome.

For future reference, what do I do if something is happening to Loyal & it's my turn to post something?)

 

'Twas I, Queen Chrysalis of the Changeling Kingdom!

Edited March 26, 2018 by Sparklefan1234

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

(I'll let ya know if I have a specific idea to fit in the role.)

 

“Heh, you have made a wise choice. Now this pathetic land can truly know the wrath of two vengeance seeking rulers!”

 

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[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(Ok.)

*Maniacal laughter* 

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•  

Edited March 27, 2018 by Sparklefan1234

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

Pointing at the ground, a shadowed throne rose up from the ground, covered in dark shadowy magic. “Heh….now...for one other order of business….” He looked at me momentarily, and, I kid you not, began FLOATING up into the air.

Free at last, yes, it’s about time
Layol Offender’s time to shine
Free at last from my eternal prison
My Queen you’ve made a wise decisio-o-o-n
Now we can make Equestria ours
We’ll cover the sun, the moon and stars
Now we’ll make it our very own land,
Others will fall while we shall sta-a-a-a-nd!

Darkness began spewing out, quickly covering the sky in pure blackness, spreading across Ponyville, Canterlot, and many other towns.
(Song’s not over yet, just a li’l chance if you wanna say something. Just...make them panic or something, or Twilight notices and wonders what the heck is happening)
 

[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(Twilight Sparkle doesn't care what happens to Loyal anymore, remember?)

 

*Spike sees dark clouds engulfing Ponyville*

 

*Panicked* 

 

Twilight, what's goin' on?! 

 

Loyal Defender just having a bad dream. It's no big deal. 

 

Oh, ok.  

 

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•  

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

“I can’t do much from here….but I can make them pay attention….” I had to do SOMETHING. I conjured up a giant boulder, and focused on wherever Twilight was. “This is ALSO for being a jerk to me.” And let it fall.

 

 

 

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[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

*Spike sees a boulder being hurled in his direction, screams* 

 

Twilight!? Look out! 

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[Loyal Defender 4,111]

 

Managing to push free, I got my muzzle out. “LAYOL!” I called out, gaining his attention before he could begin singing again.

 

“….I kindly request that you let me destroy Ponyville.”

 

“Well, aren’t you just a naughty little thing! Very well, if you so choose.” And just like that I was back in town. I flew up high, and felt darkness swirling inside.

 

“CITIZENS OF PONYVILLE,” I roared, causing everyone to look at me as I flew up. “AS OF TODAY, MOST OF YOU ARE BEING ENSLAVED, MOST OF YOU BEING DESTROYED….AND SOME OF YOU, I SHALL MAKE AS IF YOU NEVER EXISTED!” Gaining large amounts of dark magic, I began firing huge beams at everything, destroying houses, neighborhoods, and then aimed at the castle, flying into a window, and slamming my hooves into the ground.

 

“Lost cause, am I, Princess?! “ I sneered. “Well, we’ll see about that when your world’s devoured by darkness...AND BY ME!”

[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(So, since, nopony honestly cares what happens to Loyal Defender at this point, how is he ultimately going to be brought back to normal?)

 

*Nervous*

 

D'ya think Loyal means what he's saying? 

 

Of course not, Spike.  

*We're* the hero's, remember? 

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Edited March 27, 2018 by Sparklefan1234

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

(As long as you have a good ending and apologies planned, he’ll listen. He’s not going to not listen – he just wants revenge.)

 

“I want you and your pathetic little friends to know just how jerkish you all are! Disrespecting a poor innocent Alicorn who wanted to make friends. You don’t DESERVE to be a Princess of Friendship if you treat me this way. You KNEW of my impending doom. You helped me hide. You gave me a place to stay. Now, because you threw me out like everyone else, they shall all pay for their crimes...STARTING WITH YOU!”

 

 

I felt darkness wanting to consume me….so I let it. I felt sharper wings protruding out my back, my horn growing to a sharper point, teeth sharpening, and body growing...soon I felt all powerful...almighty, even. “Now you AND the world shall feel my pain….the wrath…..OF ROYAL OFFENDER!”

 

[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(I have NO apologies planned. I had them say what they said because they meant it.) 

(Cool evil name, btw.)

 

*Spike whispers something to Twilight Sparkle who nods & dissapears with her number one assistant in an orb of light*

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[Loyal Defender 4,111]

“Hide all you want. This world is nothing now..”

(Well shit. No happy ending? ;-;)

 

Meanwhile, Layol continued to sing -

 

 

All those years I’ve wrassled and wressled,

Trying to escape this pathetic vessel

This world seems too good at first glance

Glad I could change it when I had the cha-a-a-ance

Darkness, Chrysalis, it’s so much cooler

Equestria will change with its two new rulers

Face it Loyal, give in, you’re now a lost cause

Now take your final bow, and enjoy your last appla-a-a-a-use!

 

Chrysalis and I will take over from here,

Filling this world with darkness and fear

This way this world looks just isn’t right

We’ll snuff it all out, every single hopeful li-i-i-i-ght!

 

Equestria and all of its towns,

We’ll rise up while they crumble down!

We’ll make an empire with this land forsaken

Wasting no time, letting no chance be taken
 

Free at last, yes, it’s about time

(All those years I’ve wrassled and wressled,)

Layol Offender’s time to shine

(Trying to escape this pathetic vessel)

Free at last from my eternal prison

(Darkness, Chrysalis, it’s so much cooler)

My Queen you’ve made a wise decision

(Equestria will change with its two new rulers)

Now we can make Equestria ours

(Face it Loyal, give in, you’re now a lost cause)

We’ll cover the sun, the sky, the moon and stars

(Now take your final bow, and enjoy your last applause)

Now we’ll make it our very own land,

Others will fall while we shall sta-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-nd!

[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

(Not all stories have happy endings. This isn't a Disney project.

Plus, after all the times everypony tried to help Loyal & *nothing* worked, they just gave up on him 100%.)

 

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[Loyal Defender 4,111]

(alright.

 

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Edited March 27, 2018 by Loyal Defender

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

….

Wait a minute. How could I have been so blind?! This is exactly what Layol WANTED! He wanted me to lash out at everypony, not realizing the destruction I was causing! This had to have all been an illusion! After everything Princess Twilight and her friends had done for me, I wasn’t going to let Layol win!”

 

Roaring in anger, I bolted into the sky and back out towards th Changeling Hive. I had a sense of direction telling me where it was. I found it soon enough, and began slamming through the ground.

 

Thud…

Thud…

Thud….

…

THUD.

 

 

A Changeling perked his ears up. “Um…..my Queen? You DID stabilize the upper hive levels, right?”

 

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[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

That was Charlize's job, you fool! 

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Edited April 3, 2018 by Sparklefan1234

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

I crashed into the hive, right on top of the Changeling (he’ll be fine).

“Oh-ho, my rival returns! Come to join the dark side? I knew you’d want to. After all, we’re both the sa--”
BLLLZMMM!

I threw Layol into a wall, darkness surging through me. “No,” I answered. “I’ve come to eliminate you.”

 

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[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

*Cheers from the Changelings as they watch the battle between the two ponies*

Edited April 3, 2018 by Sparklefan1234

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

 

“WHAT?! B-BUT...the darkness was supposed to make you go mad with power!”

 

“I am mad. And I am full of power. But I’m not going to take it out on my friends. You’ve been using my fears to hold me back. But that’s going to change, NOW.”

 

Layol got up, spitting what was supposed to be blood (but was just black stuff) from his mouth, a tooth missing. “Oh, so you wanna play that game, hm?”

 

“…..W E ‘ L L P L A Y T H A T G A M E . “ He lifted me up, and slammed me around into the walls and ceiling, bruising me all over, throwing me into the ground and slamming into me.

 

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[Sparklefan1234 161,994]

Oooh! That's *gotta* hurt. 

Edited April 3, 2018 by Sparklefan1234

[Loyal Defender 4,111]

He began to charge at me, full speed. I dodged out of the way, letting him ram into the wall, knocking it over. “Hope that was insured!” He taunted.

 

 

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