Best Insults

[HeroSparks 232]

My favorite that I've ever come up with was "you'll never be an otter." Said this to my girlfriend when we were at the pool joking around and she laughed and told me that was the coldest thing anybody has ever said to her

[PlzDelete 2,456]

"I bet your dad tongue-punches your fart-box" - 14 year old Pudding

[StormBlaze 992]

being British, we're pretty harsh on our insults. They just roll off the tongue or have a sharp edge to them when said mwwaha. 

anyway my fave ones are "Twat-hammer" and "douche canoe". 

or the best ones against Americans or everyday joes are the ones where you use ye olde long lost English words that are not an insult, but the uneducated masses take as an insult. eg: "you in-eloquent tarquin" 

[Yakamaru 3,129]

Ah yes, the insults thread. I tried making one on several other forums, but the shit got banned because you had snowflakes getting triggered. Fun shit.

 

A couple insults you can take with you:

Twatwaffle

Fuckwit

Cuntnugget

Fucking wankstain

Religion of piss

Dickwomble

Gypsy

Libtard

Cuckservative

Bumblecunt

 

I have more, but will leave it at that.

[Eternal Nature 321]

So this woman and I got into an argument over something stupid about big dicks (mind you she started with a racial slur, and I wasn't having that), till she started talking about her boyfriend being artillery in the military, saying that he's got a big dick with a big "payload". If stereotypes were real, she'd be the embodiment of the "Blonde Girl", cause she thought all men from the artillery side had the biggest of dicks, and the biggest of payloads.

Ranting aside, finally I had enough bullshit for one day and told her that "I don't mean to sound racist at the end this comment I will make, but not all men have big dicks and packages, and that's excluding the Asians". Sure enough, her husband comes online and see this, and starts laughing IRL, cause low and behold, he was Asian. 

Hope their doing fine after that escapade.

 

Edited October 11, 2017 by Eternal Nature

[Guest]

You must have been born on a highway, because that's where most accidents happen.

[Fluttershutter 2,581]

Your mother is so fat

[Kaneki 1,073]

Immediately I just think of how creative the AVGN gets with how he describes games (making up swears by combining them). I don't have any off the top of my head, but that's what I thought of.

[EpicEnergy 23,227]

People think of insults as words directed at the person, but what's more insulting is being ignored or simply not caring about what the person said. Like someone says "you suck" and you are just like "ok".

[TheRockARooster 52,548]

I get a lot of my insults from movies and I can't share some in here, lolololol.

[Iforgotmybrain 5,899]

"Hey pal, you just blow in from stupid town?" will always remain one of my favorites.

[ZiggWheelsManning 11,507]

13 hours ago, TheRockARooster said:

I get a lot of my insults from movies and I can't share some in here, lolololol.

Laundry list of bad words  

2 hours ago, Iforgotmybrain said:

"Hey pal, you just blow in from stupid town?" will always remain one of my favorites.

Big Pink Loser  

[Snoopy Fan 2,734]

“Why, don’t you watch where you’re going, God-spilla?” -Hamm (Toy Story 2)

[Clawdeen 15,660]

Yeah I can’t share those on here lol

[DubWolf 17,445]

Heheh, well. Friend asks friend "roast me", so friend asks the OP, "what did the 2 say to the 9"?

 

 

"Roast me".

 

1 hour ago, Clawdeen said:

Yeah I can’t share those on here lol

But there is another place that you cannn ...

[Starlight Serenade 3,679]

There's a lot of insults that I heard over the years, here are some of the silly ones:

"He has the physique of a bag of milk"

"If brains were gasoline you couldn't fuel a fly's motorcycle for a trip around a drop of water"

“high school was the best 9 years of his life”

"He's so stupid that if it was raining soup, he’d be outside with a fork.”

"I wouldn't give him the sleeves off my vest. "

"Actor!? He couldn’t play dead if you shot him!!!"

"He couldn't draw a dollar with a green crayon"

 

Edited January 30 by Starlight Serenade
added last line

[Snoopy Fan 2,734]

“Hey, buddy, you need a ride? I was just on my way to the big doofus convention.”

[KPackratt 397]

"Man, you're so slow, even a turtle can go faster than you."

"Nice clothes, where did you get them at? A clown store?"