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yisetab28

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Everything posted by yisetab28

  1. yisetab28
    Grammar is an essential part in understanding a story. When I point out someone's grammar, it means that his syntax is so f*cked up I can barely understand anything. Pointing out grammar errors is what we are supposed to do. Personally, I would love having people criticize me about my grammar and telling me what's wrong instead of just leaving a downvote and saying nothing on my stories, which is what's happening now.
  2. yisetab28
    Then if your wheels are blocked, it probably means that you don't have a lot of expertise in these sort of fics, or that there's downright not many possibilities for the sort of fics. I would recommend you to keep the romance as a sub-plot, and write a bigger story around it.
  3. yisetab28
    You don't need to draw an OC to have it. The only OC I have drawn is Blitzkrieg here. The other ones in my fanfic have never been drawn neither by me or by anyone else. An OC can be only written and not visual. Anyways, I could draw it if you wanted to.
  4. yisetab28
    Well you should at least have an idea of what you will write before starting the story. If you just go asking around people which ship would be the best, you clearly have no idea what you're gonna do.
  5. yisetab28
    Woah, if you have so many shipping choices, you should narrow them down first. You don't just say "hey, I'm going to write a ship fic!" and choose random characters to ship.
  6. yisetab28
    As the others have told you, what is the fic going to be about? You can't just toss any character in any fic. Anyways, use your own OCs. You will be able to do what you want and not be restricted by someone else's mind.
  7. yisetab28
    25 years after a cataclysm has wiped out all magic in Equestria, the world is torn in a war against the Celestian Empire and the Lunar Republic. After a failed attack by Luna on Canterlot, the surviving soldiers must retreat to the nearby town of Ponyville, and hold the front line against an imminent counter-attack. Symphony of Steel is their story. As we follow their siege, we discover more about their past and Ponyville's. But who is that so called paratrooper who can't even fight? Why are the "Sunbutts" even here and not directly attacking? Would there be something more to this small town named Ponyville? Story link: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/256918/symphony-of-steel
  8. yisetab28
    Whorse please, cherry seller. Rip off naive ponies and sell cherries at 100 bits each.
  9. yisetab28
    Also, if you can't get it submitted now, could you attach a .txt file of your draft so that I can see it?
  10. yisetab28
    First, not to offend you but you really must work on your grammar, I can barely understand anything. Second, try to write a long enough intro about the setting: where the story is, when it happens, why is happens, stuff like that before actually introducing the characters. In "Symphony of Steel" (my fanfic here :http://www.fimfiction.net/story/256918/the-30th-tiger), I spend something like 5 paragraph describing the setting before actual action, and the characters are only mentionned in the 3rd paragraph. Be precise. Tell us where and when, but not what or who. We need to know what happened to understand the story. Don't be afraid to stretch it out, you could have a whole intro chapter if you think it's adequate. Finally, some tutorials about apocalyptic stuff and describing from the excellent website Springhole. Read the tutorials there, they help. A lot. http://www.springhole.net/writing/apocalyptic-cataclysmic-plot-scenario.htm http://www.springhole.net/writing/build-better-post-apocalyptic-and-or-dystopian-settings.htm http://www.springhole.net/writing/pitch-your-story.htm Have fun and good writing.
  11. yisetab28
    How do we know that she survived for 11 months? Why 11 months? Why did she die there? AND DON'T YOU DARE SAY PINKIE PIE
  12. yisetab28
    Although Pinkie Pie is undoubtedly awesome, she is not a good explanation if you are writing a serious fanfic. Also, why did AJ and other ponies who would know how to handle stuff didn't survive, but a girl who brags and lies for a living does? And just "I feel she needed love" does not justify why she survived. In my fanfic, most of those who are still there in the war are there because they were the best, the ones who knew how to fight and survive, and no one, no one survived because of love. In a post-apocalyptic world such as the one you are writing, only the best survive, and I doubt Trixie has any real life experience. I highly recommend you go on Springhole and read some of the tutorials there.
  13. yisetab28
    Ok then, here are a few tips and questions you need to get right for the story: Why did Trixie survive? Why her and not other more able ponies? Why did she fall asleep for more than 1 year? How do we know that an apocalyptic event will strike a few weeks later? Why did you use "started" (a past tense verb) to describe an event in the future? Well unless you want to do something about time travel, that would justify it but still, it's a confusing grammar. Why did those other ponies survive? Who are they? What is the cataclysm that happened 1 year earlier? Those are some questions I would ask myself when reading your fanfic. You need to remember to take everything into account, not leave a single detail behind.
  14. yisetab28
    Nah, putting your stuff here is fine. Care to give me the link to the fic? I might be able to help.
  15. yisetab28
    Considering ponies are always naked I don't think anyone needs that.
  16. yisetab28
    I wasn't angry, I was doing a DBZ reference. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiMHTK15Pik
  17. yisetab28
    Oh. Yeah, I must admit the war has been done OVAR 9000 times, but I really couldn't find two better ponies to make them go in war against each other.
  18. yisetab28
    How many of what exactly?
  19. yisetab28
    Well I say f*ck you other fics. I didn't start drawing or getting my fanfics out there for them to blend in the crowd. I did it so that they stand out. I will call Celestia's army Celestians. Even though she represents the sun, she is named Celestia after all. Also not to be offensive, but you should watch your grammar. And did you say my story was... copied? I've seen my share of WW2 fanfics but no other tells the story of a Tiger tank crew, so I don't see where you find the "1000 other copied fics".
  20. yisetab28
    Well I do have a Grammar Nazi level spelling and some pretty good notes in writing. This is not actually the first story I wrote, but the first I'm making public. I'm very happy you think my story is good. Also not to be a beggar, but upvotes would be nice, mostly psychologically. He's actually a private who is new to the war, so I thought he would not also learn that the enemy is not that different from him, but also what war is really about, and that it's more than just patriotism and doing what's right. Also, I got a new idea thanks to "Ziggy and Angelbaby". The soldier is a PoW on a Lunar transport plane to one of the camps, and when it's going to crash, the copilot goes in the cargo bay and unties the prisoners, and Silver Streak is one of survivors. He has a great debt to the copilot, which comes into the story later and identifies Silver Streak.
  21. yisetab28
    Well what should I call Luna's forces? Moonbutts? Celestian is for Celestia, Lunar is for Luna.
  22. yisetab28
    Celestia is the enemy for the crew. Both sides do horrible things (because you know, world war going on).
  23. yisetab28
    The thing is Twilight isn't the leader, Luna is. The story is set 25 years after the events of S4, and Twilight still doesn't have a big role in this. I know that of all the mane 6, she is the only one (after Flutter, duh) who I know that will be against war and try to negotiate a peace if there was one. I may talk about her later, but I don't plan to do so, or to involve any of the Mane 6 and canon characters other than the princesses in this story. For the front line, Canterlot is one of the main strategic cities that both side want to capture (and acts a little like a pride point, like Stalingrad did), and the Celestian armies were planning a counter-attack after the attack by the main character's tank divisions failed, and the story sort of centers around them holding Ponyville and not letting the enemy capture so they don't have time to settle in it and bring the front line closer while waiting for the reinforcements. Anyways, the fanfic is here: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/256918/the-30th-tiger First chapter mainly finished, second one is about the paratrooper and will be released soon. I'm not shying away from the challenge, but this is my first fanfic I've ever written and I'm not very confident about my skills, so I was not sure which to go with.
  24. yisetab28
    Well does a plane flying in some supplies for the nearby troops and getting shot down make sense? The main characters are in Ponyville which is only a few kilometers away from the front line, and will become the front line later in the plot. Plus, there are some enemy troops just next to them. As for the romance, I maybe will put some, but it's going to be a barely noticeable side plot, as I don't really think a story about war should focus too much on a romance story. There is one female character (which is my part OC part Ponysona Blitzkrieg), but I rather considered making her and the other soldiers teach the paratrooper who just got in the army how war is really like and changing his mind about the other side and his job. Kind of making him go to "I go to war to kill evil Lunars and it's the right thing" to "I'm in the war to kill other ponies who are just like me, and I doubt that's right". A romance plot between Blitz and Silver Streak (the paratrooper's name) would be more difficult to implement, since she and the tank crew have already been together for 2 years and forged strong bonds. I'm still in highschool and I've never been good with girls anyways so I doubt I can even write a romance plot with some quality in it. But I'll see what I can do.
  25. yisetab28
    So I've been writing a fanfic about a Celestia VS Luna war with WW2 era weapons, and one of the main elements in it is a paratrooper found by a Lunar tank crew. However, I can't decide if he will be a Celestian soldier or a Lunar soldier. Making him a Celestian soldier and only revealing it at the end would add an interesting twist to the plot, but it would be harder to write it, as I need to find a reason for why he landed behind enemy lines and why the crew didn't realize he was actually an enemy. Writing him as a Lunar soldier would be more simple, but I think I would miss a great opportunity to show a more significant psychological development of that character. So, what should he be?
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