~WhiteHawk~

I live in Florida, so I've been through a lot of hurricanes and storms. Once, at my grandfather's house, there was a tornado in the neighboring county that tore off part of a jail. A few years ago, there was this huge storm rolling through at about 5 in the morning when I heard about a tornado warning on my radio while getting ready for school. I woke up my mom and we turned on the news to see that 3 tornadoes were headed in our direction but were currently on the water. We were one of the only solid houses on our road, so we had a family with 4 kids stay at our house that day. One of them went to school though, since our middle school had a very safe gym for the students to stay in during something like that. It was completely made of concrete, so her parents sent her there during the storm. The rest of the kids stayed at our house, though, since the elementary school was a piece of shit. Two of the tornadoes died when they hit land, and the other one skirted around our area at the last minute. A few other formed I think, but none of them hit us. The next day there was a big storm, but no tornado warnings yet so I went to school that day. But during first period we were stuck for longer than usual because the winds were pretty bad. Oh my god, I was terrified. Luckily, no tornadoes that day. I also slept through a earthquake in Nevada once. While I was there, there was this huge blizzard too. My cat got stuck in it and we couldn't do anything. A week later he showed up though.

To just.... I guess just to live. I want to wake up and experience everything. I want to wake up, work on school work, talk to friends, have fun with fellow bronies, furries, and my Tumblr friends. I want to just have fun and enjoy life. I'm not completely sure what my meaning of life is, because I haven't discovered it yet. I want to have fun yes, but is that all I'm going to be able to do in life? Or is there something more? I sometimes question how important my existence is. Would anyone care if I was gone? Or am I just another useless slave of the American government being used to make them money? But at the same time, I've learned to try not to question this as much. Whatever put me on this earth, there must of been a reason. It's just finding it. I think worrying about it will get you nowhere. I just want to wake up and have fun. I want to wake up knowing that my friends and family love me, and that I'm doing okay. I know I'm not going to be a very important person, and that I will never probably make a huge difference in another person's life, but that won't stop me from living. I think having fun and living life is as good of a reason as any to live.

~ I have a bit of an obsession with soda. I always drink at least one can of either Dr. Pepper or Coke a day. I know it's not healthy, but soda is just soooo good. ~ I've never been a good writer, but I come up with several stories in my head. When I'm bored I'll play them out in my mind, and I've become very attached to the characters I've created. And I come up with them quickly, too. Sometimes if I hear a song a like a lot, I'll create a character whose personality, past, and future has something to do with lyrics from the song. Then I come up with other characters for that story and make a huge plot out of it. ~ I enjoy fursuiting. In fact, I'm gathering supplies to make my first partial now. ~ I talk to my pets often, especially my Cockatiel. Mainly because I'm familiar with his body language and he makes certain sounds according to what he wants. For example, he'll make a very loud and annoying sound when he wants attention. Then he'll make quiet adorable sounds when I give it to him. He'll also bite my face if I'm not paying him enough attention when I have him out. So sometimes I have little conversations with him. My family thinks I'm a bit crazy because of it. ~ I like really strange, dark, and disturbing music. Creature Feature and Mindless Self Indulgence are my two favorite bands. ~ I've always wished I was either a hawk or an owl. I love birds and ever since I was a kid I've wanted to fly up in the sky as one. That's why my ponysona is a Pegasus, because I can live out a bit of my fantasy through her. I can't think of much else right now. ^^;

I agree. Most of the haters either no idea what they're talking about or are just following the crowd. And since most of the people I've seen hating on bronies and furries spell like they're five years old, I believe that they're either very ignorant, or somebody's parents let them go on the internet. But yes, I agree, we just need to ignore them. The only reason that they keep showing back up is because people keep paying them attention. I've learned to just ignore them, since they're not worth talking to. And if they talk to me directly, I piss them off by showing them I don't care. Then they leave and I go on my merry brony way. As the famous internet saying goes, haters gonna hate. Nobody should have to worry about the haters. Just ignore them and they'll go away.

Eehhh, I'm don't feel too well about myself. I mean, I'm okay with myself most of the times, but sometimes I hate myself with a passion. But then again, other times I feel amazing about myself. I mean, I've been told that I'm pretty, but I don't see how a girl with hair amazingly hard to take care of with acne that's also hard to tame scattered around her face is pretty. Average figure, ugly acne, I just hate how I look. I'm sort of a cynical person, though, but I just can't help it. It's just a habit I've developed after years of betrayal and disappointments. But hey, sometimes being a bitch can be a good thing to be. Because of my temper no one really screws with me. It's good and bad at the same time. People can never bring me down, because I have a witty comeback most of the time. Hell, once this dude was telling me to rot in hell with my rainbow flag (this idiot was trying to screw with me about being pansexual) so I started replying with lyrics to the Double Rainbow song thing. It was funny as hell. But, being sarcastic is most of the time a bad trait to have. I hate how much of a bitch I can be at times. I've changed a lot from the kind, innocent girl I was in my first few years of middle school. I don't feel good about myself when it comes to that. I'll have to give myself a 5/10, only because I like how I can't be brought down by anyone but myself. I may not be amazingly smart nor do I have the best habits, but at least I'm proud to be me. I don't give a flying fuck what anyone else thinks about me. I'll walk down the street wearing a brony t-shirt and a tail, see if I care. At least I'm confident.

Ehh, I have mixed feelings about dating. I'm a very mistrusting person, so not many are able to get close to me. Not to mention I'm only a teenager and dating isn't my top priority. Though, at the moment I want someone to be there for me in a more friendly than romantic sense. Just someone that I can trust. I do have a silly little teenage crush at the moment, but they are dating someone. Plus, they're my best friend so I doubt they'll be interested in anything more than being friends. I don't worry about it much, though I do feel lonely at times and wish I did have someone to turn to. I don't get the chance to talk to my friends much because of me being homeschooled, so I guess it's natural to be lonely. But I don't focus on dating. Mainly because I seriously doubt anyone would be willing to date me anyway, and I'm just trying to finish up school as fast as possible. I'm not very pretty, nor am I the kind of person that's easy to get along with. No one wants to date a sarcastic bitch with weird interests and an obsession with the internet, video games, and random television shows like MLP and Doctor Who. I'm not looking for a very romantic relationship like most people my age. I want someone I can be openly weird and crazy around, who will also be there for me if I'm depressed or angry. Not someone who only cares about kissing. :/ though someone to cuddle with wouldn't be bad.

Well, I've always loved birds and after a interesting experience with a Red Tailed Hawk that lived around my area, I fell in love with hawks. I started doing research about them and started admiring white hawks. Not to mention at the time I was studying Shamanism and looked up to birds because 2 of my spirit guardians were apparently birds. So I decided to call myself WhiteHawk online.

Yeah, I agree, but what I said was that I find the song a comedy. God, I don't think she's a good musician at all. I find the song hilarious because of the pointlessness of the lyrics and the not-so-good singing. I agree, people shouldn't be made famous because they have rich parents. That's probably where Rebecca went wrong. She wouldn't even be famous if she wasn't rich already.

*Silently creeps up* I think I have found my people.

I've always been paranoid. Just comes naturally, I guess. The fears I can remember are: ~ I refuse to go outside during a storm. This is because when I was 8 at my grandfather's house there was a tornado nearby, though we didn't know about it till the morning. He lived on a barn, so his house was rocking back and forth all night long. I'm terrified of any kind of big storm. ~ I always feel like I'm being watched. I constantly look around to see who's watching me, and it's really bad in public, because I feel like every single person there is silently judging me. ~ I'm terrified of public speaking. The last one pretty much explains it ~ I've always been afraid of someone murdering my family, but not me. Just leaving me alone without anyone there with me. I'm more scared of being alone than death. ~ I always curl up when I go to sleep, because I always seem to think that if my hand dangles off the edge something will bite me. ~ I'm always nervous when I swim in the ocean. I move slowly because I'm afraid of stingrays. I'm actually not that scared of sharks, I'm just terrified of stepping on a stingray since they're pretty common where I live. ~ I'm always paranoid that someone I trust will betray me. It's very difficult for me to warm up to someone, because I'm terrified of being betrayed. But yeah, that's all I can remember for now.

Oooh man I'm so much different online than in real life. Online, I'm strange, outgoing, and as social as I can be. Real life, I am such a bitch. I'm snappy due to anger management problems and I always seem to let a sarcastic comment about something before thinking. In school, I was that weird girl with a couple friends that sat in the back of class quiet and always looking pissed off about something. With my past problems I developed a fear of being hurt and abandoned again, so I act like this to avoid that. Though around friends I'm much more open. But yeah, I'm just a typical sarcastic bitch that nobody likes out of the internet. Online is where I'm safe, so I act more comfortable on here.

Sigh. It's a real shame what society is doing to kids. Before my 8 year old sister was pulled out of school she was being sexually assaulted by her classmates. LITTLE 8 YEAR OLDS. It's just... God. I mean, like others, I lost my innocence at an early age. 10 years old, I developed depression, anxiety, anger problems, and abandonment issues. I was forced to grow up and learn to be mistrusting and cold to protect myself from being hurt again. I knew about things a ten year old shouldn't have, like sex, porn, gore, rape, ect. Now I just try to protect my sister from shit other kids her age are exposed to. Thank god our mom pulled her from school and began homeschooling. Imagine having to help you mother explain to you 8 year old sister what the other kids were doing. It's sickening, and is why I'm so protective. Hopefully people stop exposing their kids to such bullshit.

Ooooh I have so many stories for this. I remember this one girl I used to go to school with though Lunar Eclipses could only happen on Sunday because it has the word 'sun' in it. I swear, my jaw hit the floor at that moment. Another guy that I saw on Youtube was a typical brony hater who thought bronies were all autistic and commented on this video of a brony interview saying "those kids better get away from that brony, they might catch his autism". I replied calmly asking him if he even knew what being autistic meant and he just kept ignoring my points in the argument and spouting bullshit. Eventually I snapped telling him to fuck off, and that I was done talking to such an ignorant asshole, though he kept pushing me even after I gave up. I swear, some people will just never learn. Oh, also the people that keep saying 'yiff in hell furfags' and 'clop in hell, faggots', like they think those stupid sayings will actually make us stop liking what we like. Because them saying that is TOTALLY gonna make us stop and/or kill ourselves. And they'll actually kill all of us. You know, cause little immature assholes that are probably kids that found the internet trying to look cool are gonna be able to do anything.

Agnostic. As a kid, my grandmother always took me to church, so I have that sort of influence, though I hardly believe in anything from the Bible. I wouldn't consider myself an Atheist because I do believe in some things, like I still skirt on the edge of Shamanism a bit, but I don't dedicate myself to one religion. Every religion I've seen has something I disagree with, so I remain open to everything as well as questioning it.

I played it for a bit at my godbrother's house. I shit myself. I refuse to play the game without a friend or somebody. I really want to play it, but I'm terrified. ;.;

Steam: WhiteHawk19 I play mostly Portal 2 and Minecraft. Unfortunately, my computer can't hold any new games. I'm planning on getting a new computer with more space on it soon, though. Hopefully. And that's pretty much it. ^^;

I know how you feel. My parents split when I was only seven. But trust me, if your parents were fighting a lot, oh my god it's so much better. I'm sure that soon there will be a thing arranged where you will be able to see your father and everything will be just fine. I'm sure there was a good reason for your mother to do what she did. It will be a lot better from now on. I hope things go smoothly for you, and don't fret about your parents. Things will get so much better after this blows over.