Hat988

Welcome! I hope you enjoy yourself. I've been to a few different forums and this one seems to be the most level-headed.

Favourite scene.

Looks like new parkour and combat mechanics and maybe attacking more than one at once. The enemies still stand around you and wait their turn to get stabbed though.

Welcome!

I am watching it on Fimfiction and really liked the first chapter The second chapter seemed as if you had the plot all planned out then you ran through it quickly like checking the points off a list. Even though you described a party, it would be a good opportunity to have Pinkie and Vinyl take turns with the music so they can take care of the guests. We could then see how they approach parties and interact with others - Pinkie might want everyone to try the cupcakes for her recipes or Vinyl might find some statement by a random background pony pertinent to her relationship with Octavia. This would give you more opportunity for making the characters more familiar and realistic as well as potentially giving you areas for a subplot. At the moment, it looks like a very typical romance problem that you might see on daytime TV which needs some unique twist to it. I'm suggesting you can make the characters more interesting and do the rather formulaic approach really well or you can shake the plot around. Preferably both. A way you might do this as an author is to write from the plan as you have done. Then give the Pinkie and Vinyl more to do. Plan a second pass by finding where potential scenes could be (such as expanding on the party) and figure out what else they might want to do. Do a third pass for characters like Octavia and her new friend if you think its necessary. I hope you take this as constructive advice because I do like your story and hope to see it continued

Out of all the superpowers, I think control of time would be the best. What would you use this ability for? If you could stop time, do stuff, and turn it back on, do you think you would eventually do all the things (!) or would you become bored/crazy with the potential? Here are the rules: - You can stop everything around you. You still function and anything you purposefully interact with is changed (e.g. no footstep marks but you can move an object). - You can snap back in position with where you were before. People watching you wouldn't notice you stopped time, moved around, then resumed. - You can go back and forward and make changes to see how differently things will play out. Complete with undo function! I know this would be great for students. Have a high distinction report submitted by the afternoon it was given. Impress the audience of game shows! Stop, go to a library/learn how to cook something/find the weak points of the obstacle course, and resume. Want another superpower? You have forever to figure out how to make it happen. Edit: I forgot the most important one! Be the first to submit pony art after a new episode. Edit 2: You don't age when time is stopped.

"I'll hug you even if I have to pin you against this wall!"

Yes! But to a housesitter, not to me. I have a glass sanctuary (big box) for my pet snake but sometimes I let it roam free to stretch around the house. I was away for a while so I got a friend to mind the house for me. When I left, I saw it climbing up one of the tree branches towards the top but it didn't look like it could get over. I got a phone call from the housesitter five days after I left telling me the snake wasn't eating its food. I told him how to move the things inside about without really delving in so he did that and he found the snake wasn't there! Even though he said he wasn't afraid of snakes, I think he only meant that when they were contained because I could hear his voice quiver asking where it could be hiding. It could be anywhere I told him! It's not like it could strangle anyone easily. I said have a good night and turned the phone off to save battery. The snake eventually found him and he cordoned off a corner of his bedroom with boxes. My pet got past that of course but he didn't know until he showed me when I got back. Has your pet bitten a friend and they didn't know until later?

On average! Like with sharks and snakes, if you are unlucky enough you'll get the brave one.But this effort is necessary for the integrity of the alphabet. Plus, beauty is in the eye of the beeholder.

Guys, you are missing the real revelation.

His book is getting starbombed (starbomb is a neat word) on Amazon with most bad reviews having keywords such as 'stolen, bad gramer (sic), sue, copyright.' I wonder how many of them read the book or are just AC fans defending the game :/

There are lots of structures you can study to help you get a plot that reads well and doesn't drift. I got most of them from a really handy book but they are probably available online too (what adventure, romance, tragedy etc plots usually have.) These structures are useful because many problems with pacing and overall coherence can be fixed with them. However, read them enough so you remember but don't excessively refer back and write by the numbers. Write as you would normally, but with a structure in the back of your mind. The structures can be better used as diagnostic tools once something is written - like shaping your clay. But you have to have the clay down first. Something you might feel is that it is difficult to be original. There are many sources that say there are no original plots (even if the claim is rather unfalsifiable.) Two points to remember: it doesn't matter if a story has been done before if you can do it better. And you have to know where the box is before you can start thinking outside of it. Don't feel pressured to do so, but see if you can write every day and at a specific time. Similar to the circadian rhythm, doing an activity at the same time every day trains your mind to ready itself for the activity and work at a fuller capacity. Doing this also gives you practice. If you don't feel like you are improving, think of the probabilities - practicing every day gives you a high chance of improvement. Not practicing obviously gives you zero chance of improvement. To address your perceived lack of imagination: figure out the scenario and put familiar characters in (e.g. mane six.) When you are not sure what to write, think of what the characters would do. Hope that helps

BF3. BC2 already got rid of most of the fun stuff but was still overall good but BF3 finished the job. I can barely even see anything from the amount of contrast they pumped in.

Welcome, I'm new here too! The avatar might be too big in file size. It has to be 100KB or less. If you want, I can resize it for you.

I like it! Not sure what to suggest for improvements.

I suggest to write the story and think of the title at the end. "The Six Pioneers?"

Oops, you're right. I didn't read the first post properly. Bonus video! I call this the 'cool down, everything is handled' tune http-~~-//www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9g2sabUQYE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXvpdN-y03k

I don't think there is anything original left to do. Therefore, instead of putting significant effort into something that may not be wholly innovative and simply turning it into a significantly better rendition of what is out there, I suggest opening the Pony Creator game on DeviantArt and hitting random. The cutie mark is a tough one since it requires an image of your own. I recommend you use this flank-image as a gateway to your own personal endeavours - for example, you could have a screencap of a paragraph of a fanfic you made. However, this requires opening one or more tabs in the browser as well as using kilobytes of hard disk space. You can then either adopt a 'blank flank' or find a picture of Tweety Bird on Google Images.