Humans vs Equestria, who would win ?

[GONEFOREVER 518]

Earth. Seriously, The entire map of Equestria is so small that the entire thing could be taken out by a dozen or so hydrogen bombs. Yes the equestrians have magic, but human capacity for development would probably find some way to counter it. And ponies aren't a warlike race like us humans, they'd probably try to make peace... while the human peacemaker would wear a suicide vest to the negotiations and blow everyone up.

[Espurr 449]

Humans. If anyone says we don't have magic, we do. It's called technology.

Some people could also say love, but I don't know how to use that to blow stuff up.

[Commissar Alexer 763]

Let the headcanons debate begin!

[Fractured 2,683]

Let the headcanons debate begin!

This post is now best post. Let's all discuss the theories of magic proof armor, and "anti-human" spells, mana bullets and magical minefields...

[Bendy 1,819]

This post is now best post. Let's all discuss the theories of magic proof armor, and "anti-human" spells, mana bullets and magical minefields...

 

But human and pony alliance parallel universe. Would would the ponies win then? XD

Edited January 14, 2015 by Rush

[Fractured 2,683]

But human and pony alliance parallel universe. Would would the ponies win then? XD

Nothing. Turns out, all of our inter-dimensional travel opened up a portal to another universe, and then we find...

Oh, the perils of space-time shenanigans...

[Hocus Pocus 636]

HA! That's an easy question! Hands down, the ponies would win, because they have magic!

 

... but wait... we have machine guns... so humans would win!

 

... but wait... unicorns can cast barriers... so ponies would win!

 

...but wait... we have tanks that could probably shatter those barriers... gosh this is harder than I thought!

 

But what about Shining Armor's barriers? But what abourtcarpet bombings? But what about Alicorn Magic?How about Human's lust for destruction?

 

 

Okay, I think I have the result...

 

The Human VS Pony War of 20X5 brought destruction and desolation to both worlds...

In the end, neither side prevailed over the other, nearly everyone died in the war, as all that is left of Earth and Equestria is but a battle-scarred wasteland.

 

Several years have passed since then. The Ponies and Humans live in a husk of their formal worlds, the war doesn't matter anymore... all that matters is survival. Survival from nature, survival from hunger and thirst, survival.... from each other.

 

Now the only way the ponies and humans can restore their worlds is by working together....

together.... with the magic of friendship!

MYYY LITTLE PONYYY~ *Da da-da ta-daaa duh da~!*

 

.... Somepony's gonna write a fanfic about this... aren't they?

Edited January 26, 2015 by Hocus Pocus

[Lisa 5,552]

Lol, this is an actual topic? 

 

Equestria of course with friendship and cuteness. :3

[KokuraiNoSenshi 3,463]

Depends, on things like dragons, Tirek, Discord, the Alicorns, and so on grouping up as one big entity or are they split? Because if so, indefinite yes, as we have seen all of them being able to take hits and dish the out hard. If not, it would be a bit more fair but still heavily in favor of the ponies, as they would have things we would never have expected as well as much more variety. It would be a lot easier to learn how to counter things like our guns (hide behind a thick wall), explosions (we've seen projectiles be reflected back pretty easily), and even chemicals wouldn't have an affect as we know the ponies can create shields of magic to protect from disease. While I don't know how useful the Pegasi and Earth Ponies would be in direct conflict, I could definitely see them taking the lead and the Unicorns having a serious upper hand due to just their sheer amount of magic. Hell they could just lift a bunch of boulders up and smoosh us like ants, no problem.

 

As fun as that was to think over, are we really suggesting strategies to fight talking technicolor candy horses from a magical land of wonder and friendship as if they were Russia and their invasion of Ukraine?

.... Somepony's gonna write a fanfic about this... aren't they?

I've heard of worse things to put in a fanfic

[skbl17 199]

Unqualified opinion:

 

Raw numbers would point to a victory for the humans. If every Equestrian and every human was mobilized to take part in the effort, that would be 7.1 billion humans versus, well....some number significantly less than seven billion...Equestrians. However, we know that raw numbers don't determine an outcome on its own.

 

Equestrians have very powerful magic at their disposal, while humans have nuclear weapons. However, while we can assume that the most powerful ponies can telekinetically stop a few, would they be able to stop more than 7,000 warheads? Probably not, unless they have some kind of mass-disarming spell. What if humans decide not to use nuclear weapons? Where does the fighting take place? If it's on Earth, the terrain and technology would grant an advantage to the humans. If it's on Equestria, the Equestrians would have an advantage. What about guerilla warfare?

 

In the end, I think the advantage would go to the humans. They have an advantage in numbers, technology, adaptation (we have everything from nomads to highly cosmopolitan technophiles) weaponry. However, seeing as we haven't seen the ceiling for Equestrian magic, there would probably be setbacks for the humans, as I'd imagine that Equestrians would have surprises in store for the humans.

Edited January 26, 2015 by skbl17

[ShadowPhoenix 153]

I like thinking Equestria is to Earth as Krypton is to Earth, that their average citizen is above and beyond anything Earth could throw at them.

[Starshine 16,330]

Humans tend to have the most impenetrable plot armor in pretty much all kind of fictions

Ponies have plots

 

I have yet to see any show of competence from Equestria's military, and any actually fatal magic for that matter. I'd dare to say that most of their firepower came from a handful of demigodly individuals... that tend to get knocked over easily at the most inopportune times. On the other hand, United Nations is about as effective as a wet cardboard and the sun would collapse into a red giant before every nations could reach a single agreement about anything.

 

It'd be an utter bedlam, and Discord is last seen selling lemonades because the whole 'ushering an age of chaos' thing has been delegated to mutant apes with guns.

[Smarts 1,620]

This is dumb as hell.

 

Humans would win...

[Lucky Star 971]

WHY MUST WE GO TO WAR WITH ZE PONIES??

 

Lucky would prefer peace and immigration paper work from Celestia. 

 

Next stop, ponyville!

Edited June 20, 2015 by Lucky Star

[Bendy 1,819]

If ponies exist... than so does warhammer 40k universe of humanity. So, the ponies would be crushed by the Imperium of Man. 

 

That said, I rather peaceful relations with ponies in form of.... belly rubs? Mwahahaha! My master plan is rule all of pony kind with power of belly rubs. Against the power of belly rubs, there can be no victory. 

 

And if those belly rubs the human gives to pony lead kissing.... um other things, I would happily become the evil overlord of belly rubs in Equestria.

Edited June 20, 2015 by Bendy

[LeonShi500 155]

I'm sure that if it was a full out war from both sides, a magical barrier could only do so much against a wide-scale nuclear bombardment and our advanced weaponry and transportation.

Human casualties would involve having the love sucked out of them or having their legs being transformed into candy canes by magic while pony casualties would include bullet holes, radiation and diseases. -_-

Edited June 20, 2015 by LeonShi500

[Bendy 1,819]

I'm sure that if it was a full out war from both sides, a magical barrier could only do so much against a wide-scale nuclear bombardment and our advanced weaponry and transportation.

Human casualties would involve having the love sucked out of them or having their legs being transformed into candy canes by magic while pony casualties would include bullet holes, radiation and diseases. -_-

 

 

And then the God Emperor of Mankind and his Space Marines show up to slaughter all the ponies.

 

The End.

Edited June 20, 2015 by Bendy

[Luna the Great of all the Russias 2,704]

Equestria definitely.

 

Perhaps not Equestria's military, but definitely alicorns as well as other powerful beings would easily be able to crush all of humanity. If Celestia is capable of moving object of 1.989^30kg which is exponentially heavier than Earth itself, why wouldn't she able to simply take control of literally every single projectile, from ballistic missiles to individual bullets, and use them against the opponents? When you involve other great beings (other alicorns, Chrysalis, Discord, Tirek, etc. who I could imagine at least making temporary alliance if entire world was in war), it becomes overkill (not that it wasn't already).

 

gg Earth.

[Fractured 2,683]

Equestria definitely.

 

Perhaps not Equestria's military, but definitely alicorns as well as other powerful beings would easily be able to crush all of humanity. If Celestia is capable of moving object of 1.989^30kg which is exponentially heavier than Earth itself, why wouldn't she able to simply take control of literally every single projectile, from ballistic missiles to individual bullets, and use them against the opponents? When you involve other great beings (other alicorns, Chrysalis, Discord, Tirek, etc. who I could imagine at least making temporary alliance if entire world was in war), it becomes overkill (not that it wasn't already).

 

gg Earth.

Or- assuming Earth and Equestria exist on different worlds- crush the planet, or change it's trajectory, sending it hurtling into the sun. Of course, it would take a very OOC Celestia, but I get the feeling she would if she had to.

Edited June 20, 2015 by Corona de Adamas

[pastelalicorn 24]

equestria would win, i would be on equestria's side and i kick some human butt

[Bendy 1,819]

Equestria definitely.

 

Perhaps not Equestria's military, but definitely alicorns as well as other powerful beings would easily be able to crush all of humanity. If Celestia is capable of moving object of 1.989^30kg which is exponentially heavier than Earth itself, why wouldn't she able to simply take control of literally every single projectile, from ballistic missiles to individual bullets, and use them against the opponents? When you involve other great beings (other alicorns, Chrysalis, Discord, Tirek, etc. who I could imagine at least making temporary alliance if entire world was in war), it becomes overkill (not that it wasn't already).

 

gg Earth.

 

 

The fact if something as silly as the ponies to exist, means there are overpowered human to counter them.

 

Once, again I bring up gary sue humans and the Imperium of Man.

 

 

equestria would win, i would be on equestria's side and i kick some human butt

 

Even if they won... and they are true to canon ponies they would turn you put in prison for killing a human that has clearly surrendered.

 

 

Or- assuming Earth and Equestria exist on different worlds- crush the planet, or change it's trajectory, sending it hurtling into the sun. Of course, it would take a very OOC Celestia, but I get the feeling she would if she had to.

 

One word:

Exterminatus!

 

Besides... we would just defeat the ponies with the power of belly rubs.

 

 

Edited June 20, 2015 by Bendy

[silvadel 1,393]

Monkeys in trees armed with assault rifles with a range measured in miles.

[Bendy 1,819]

This thread in a nutshell.

 

Princess Celestia: Pathetic humans! Look at me! I'm real! And I'm an overpowered cartoon horse! Bow in fear before your superior pastel adorable pony masters!

 

Human Leader: You won't kill us all or turn us into ponies like so many other fan fictions will you?

 

Princess Celestia: Sweet Faust no! I'm not one of those The Conversion Bureau meanies! I only want hugs and many belly rubs from you handsome humans! And also consensual romantic relations between humans and ponies. 

 

Human Leader: OK.

 

And so humanity surrenders to their superior cartoon cute pony masters and the ponies weren't xenocidal jerks. Hugs and kisses all around.

 

The End

 

Now, that's a subjugation of humanity I can get on board with.  XD

Edited June 20, 2015 by Bendy

[Paper Lilystar 70]

i don't think humans are ready for the elements of harmony and the whole magic thing. i don't think we would nuke them straight away giving them a chance.

[Denim&Venöm 16,510]

If humanity launched an attack on Equestria, that means the villains would be caught in the crossfire. Equestria doesn't have a conventional military for a reason, and that reason is they would be useless against the threats it regularly faces.

 

You have a princess of the night/ Nightmare goddess that can control the moon or anything just as big, can invade dreams to gather info and wage psychological warfare, and dissipate into a smoke cloud. 

 

We have a unicorn king that can cast curses which affect emotions and memory as well as grow giant swaths of crystal, cause entire cities to vanish from time and space and can also transform into smoke.

 

They've got an entire race that can probably transform into anything, feed off of emotions and infiltrate human ranks. 

 

There's the mad god that can warp reality, toss the laws of nature and physics out the window and into the winnebago, and alter personalities. 

 

There's the magic stealing centaur, who could win the war for humanity by stealing all magic, but then the humans would have to contend with a giant abomination that, judging by the finale, can survive the force of atomic weapons. 

 

What else is there? How about mind controlling sirens, dark magic artifacts, ice spirits of hatred, oh and the lands residents, whom consist of: Earth ponies strong enough to lift boulders, pegasi & griffins faster than the vast majority of bullets, aircraft & missiles, that can also manipulate the weather, unicorns that can form force fields, use telekinesis, teleport, phase through objects, fire energy beams and transmute objects and people. Oh and alicorns that can do all three to the upteenth degree. 

 

Even if Equestria didn't have magic, there's a good chance humankind would still lose. America was a world atomic power in the 60s & 70s, the most advanced country on earth. We took on a backwater, third world country in Vietnam, and for all intents and purposes, lost. The chance is still there for humankind to be defeated, even without all that magic. 

 

In short: Equestria accepts your terms of surrender.