Heretick-Tock 462 August 20, 2013 Share August 20, 2013 (edited) What's blue and sings alone? Dan Aykroyd. I'm so sorry. I really am. No human being should ever be subject to that joke. I doubt even Israel would use this joke as a method of torture. Edited August 20, 2013 by Horus 1 ELITE HOT DOG BUNS™ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fire Bomb 121 August 20, 2013 Share August 20, 2013 worst joke i have ever heard, what is green and has wheels. Grass, i lied about the wheels. that joke is worse that the ones on the back of a milk carton at school 1 I'm a bomb. . . made of fire. So I bomb things. . . with fire. . . and do nothing else NOTHING! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkyDream 315 August 20, 2013 Share August 20, 2013 Saw this one in a Readers Digest recently: The U.S. Government military branch buckled to Greenpeace and decided to make ecologically friendly, energy-saving, green missiles. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest August 20, 2013 Share August 20, 2013 (edited) I was wondering why the Frisbee was getting bigger and bigger, and then... It hit me I have a t-shirt with that joke on it... dont judge me. A ball rolls around the corner and falls on its face. What went missing? The Joke Or this one: What is green, has four legs and kills you, when it jumps from a tree? A billiard table. Edited August 20, 2013 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trickiert 150 August 20, 2013 Share August 20, 2013 Okay I got a few. I should have been sad when my flashlight batteries died, but I was delighted. What do you call a clock on the moon? A Lunartick. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Broseph 215 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 (edited) It has to be the ol'"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side". Believe it or not, it actually took me so long to fully understand this joke ("the other side" meaning "death").And now that I get it, it just feels really anticlimactic..That and it just isn't funny. Edited August 21, 2013 by Broseph 2 Have a nice cold pint, and wait for all this to blow over.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinyl Scratch (Filly)™ 936 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 Terrible jokes? Hell to the yeaaah! How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it! HAHAHAHAAHAHA BEDUM DUM TSSHHHHH! 1 My OC's Viola Soulstrings Solar Ray Miles Check out my FIMFiction account ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dzastur 1,719 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 It has to be the ol' "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side". Believe it or not, it actually took me so long to fully understand this joke ("the other side" meaning "death"). That's the first time I've ever heard that explanation. I think it was always supposed to be a misdirection riddle, like "Why does a fireman wear red suspenders? To keep his pants up." The idea is that the listener is trying to come up with all the explanations for a chicken crossing the road (of which there could be many) and thus misses the obvious answer given. Har de har har. And you thought it was anti-climatic before! 3 Ain’t that Equestria / Drop on by / Ain’t that Equestria / Give friendship a try / Ain’t that Equestria / Ponies who fly / Little pink cupcakes for Pinkie Pie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nobody Special 210 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 Instantly when I saw this one thing came to my mind... womens rights. As in that one joke about womens rights being a joke. Yeah, I laughed at first but now I don't find it that funny. 2 I am not creative so... Battlefield Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frosty V 309 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 (edited) A neutron walks into a bar and sits down. He asks the bartender "How much for some whiskey?" the bartender looked at him and replied "For you, no charge." Ohh science puns I'm so hilarous Edited August 21, 2013 by Frosty V 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dzastur 1,719 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 Every single "blonde joke". I dunno. I like this one: A blonde was driving through Iowa in her convertible. As she's speeding down the highway, she looks to the left, and sees another blonde, sitting in a cornfield, in a canoe, rowing. She slams on the brakes, stands up, and yells out to the blonde in the canoe: "Hey! Cut that out! It's blondes like you that give blondes like me a bad name! I ought to swim out there and kick your ass!" Or this one: A Blonde Empowerment Seminar commences in California. Blondes from all over the United States are cheering in the audience. The master of ceremonies grabs the microphone and proceeds: "You, blondes! You're proud of who you are, right? You're not the idiots other people say you are, are you?" "No!" scream the blondes. "And we're going to prove it. I need a volunteer. One of you blondes, come up on stage!" The blondes giggle. One rushes onto the stage, and they cheer her. "Okay," says the M.C. "You're going to prove how smart blondes are. Answer this question: what's 2+2?" The blonde scrunches her face, thinking hard. "7?" The M.C. frowns. The blondes in the audience scream, "One more chance! Give her one more chance!" The M.C. concedes. "Okay, try again. What's 2+2?" The blonde scrunches her face more, thinking even harder. "Purple?" The M.C. shakes his heads. The blondes in the audience scream, "One more chance! Give her one more chance!" The M.C. concedes again. "Okay, think really, really hard this time. What's 2+2?" The blonde strains with all her might, sweat pouring down her forehead. Finally, she says, "...4?" The M.C's mouth drops in happy surprise. He looks to the audience. The blondes in the audience scream, "One more chance! Give her one more chance!" 2 Ain’t that Equestria / Drop on by / Ain’t that Equestria / Give friendship a try / Ain’t that Equestria / Ponies who fly / Little pink cupcakes for Pinkie Pie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi 1,309 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 Well seeing as how a science joke was posted, I think I'll post a somewhat scientific one.It isn't a joke, if not a pick up line, but regardless, it's awful.'You must be the cause of global warming.Because you're so hot!'As a matter of fact, my friends and I were sharing pick up lines, and I was about to vomit halfway through.They were that awful. Take Me Out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BronyPony 575 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 All jokes that involve wordplay. Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? Just the Doctor. HARHARHAHRHAHRHAHRHAHRHAHRHAHRHARHHA!!!! HARHAHRAHHRAHRHAHRHARHHARHAHHARHHHRHAHR!!! no... What does Pikachu do when he sneezes? PIKKKAAAACHUUUU!!!! 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi 1,309 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 Stop the presses, for I have found the cheesiest joke so far!Prepare your lactose-intolerant stomaches!Because if I could purchase this joke it would be in the dairy section! 1 Take Me Out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smarts 1,622 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 (edited) Any of those yo momma "jokes". I say jokes in quotation marks because those are not funny in the slightest and shouldn't be qualified as jokes. In fact, they are really dumb and the only people who use them are the unfunny kids who think they are funny. Edited August 21, 2013 by SmartyPants 3 IF is best girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Master~ Button Mash 2,307 August 21, 2013 Share August 21, 2013 (edited) Any of those yo momma "jokes". I say jokes in quotation marks because those are not funny in the slightest and shouldn't be qualified as jokes. In fact, they are really dumb and the only people who use them are the unfunny kids who think they are funny. I guess I'm an unfunny kid then. Well, TBH you're right, most are kinda lame. But there's a few that still make me go "snap!" PS: I'm also a sucker for a good "that's what she said" every now and then. As for bad jokes from me? Hmmm... Did you know Joan of Arc was the first french fry? Edited August 21, 2013 by Mutton Bash 2 Follow me on Tumblr! http://stratosthestallion.tumblr.com Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hi Hi Puffy YumiMiko 55 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 anything with "chicken butt" in it. I hate the chicken butt jokes and racist jokes too. and the jokes on disney channel that the "audience" finds "funny" 2 Welcome to Lyoko, where no one ever blinks Minä rakastan sinua! That means I love you! I love to love, but I hate to hate! Be happy! Yumi rules this planet! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ASocialyAwkwardPony 299 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 Once upon a time there was a hallway who became a corridor. That's the joke (It makes more sense in Norwegian, where "once upon a time" is written "det var en gang", and "gang" also being the Norwegian word for hallway) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DND 2,355 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 Is it bad that I'm ROFLing at all these jokes? Um, anyways, this is what my brother made up. It's so painfully unfunny, it surpasess even the chance to be funny. Everytime I drop something, my brother makes the dumbest comment: "Nice hands, feet." ... Who in god's name told you that you could be a comedian? Oh, and one from the wonderful, Quips: "What did the ocean say to the ocean?" "Sea you later!" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReverseFaller 2,483 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 The worst joke was probably when a teacher tried to assure us that the US government was competent. Oh wait, you mean joke as in a good old wisecrack, or pun? Sure, let's see. Probably this... Dead baby jokes. Look them up they exist. I don't get the point of these. 3 Credit for the signature goes to Kyoshi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heretick-Tock 462 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 What's now large after being penetrated by a large, black object?The warp gate where I just sent my ship through, you disgusting fuck. 2 ELITE HOT DOG BUNS™ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toby rogers 258 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 a blonde, a brunette, and a red head robbed a bank, they all brought a sack to hide in, the police came and knocked on the sack with the red head in it, she said woof woof, the police said oh it's just a bag of dogs, then the police knocked on the sack with the brunette in it, she said meow meow, the police said oh it's just a sack of cats, then the police knocked on the sack with the blonde in it, she said potato potato. if you want instead of her saying potato potato she can say hello? 1 “I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.” -Marilyn Monroe OC'S are on my really short about me page efyl 4 seinorB-ageN http://kevan.org/johari?name=vincent(i+am+become+death) what do you think of me http://kevan.org/nohari?name=carlton+banks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
valete 195 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 If there's such thing as a Singapore, is there a ... Singa-five? AGAHAHAUGHAJKL:KJAKK:;SLJFLS Explanation: Singapore = Singa-four 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyUsername 1,576 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 What's the difference between Swine-flu and bird-flu? Bird-flu you need Tweetment and Swine-Flu you need Oinkment. >< Its just awful 1 This adorable ball of glorious fluff that is my avatar is the creation of the glamorous Laika Hey so Johari Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuteycindyhoney 13,307 August 23, 2013 Share August 23, 2013 Okay, you asked for it!... How many mice does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Two, but I'll never figure out how they both got inside it! 2 Thank you Sparklefan1234!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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