Quotes Portfolio

[Starshine 16,333]

[idea stolen from a similar named thread on Dota forum]

 

Simple, post funny quotes from any threads in MLPForums here, and I'll put them on the first post

 

Please don't post any quotes that against the rules. Oh, and if you don't want to be quoted here or you want a certain post of yours to be removed, just post here or PM me.

 

Note: I have long given up on tracking which quotes go where. So i will just stack them up instead

 

---

.......The one I am now thinking of might get me a few warning points....It has a little ass shakey and smacky in it.

 

 

***

 

Thanks, Random Chat thread. My friend calls Applejack a man and in retaliation I accidentally say she's a "sexy mare" instead of a "classy mare".....

 

 

***

 

>implying that dog farts can actually pile up on top of each other.

 

>implying that you can't put them in jars and stack said jars

Wait what?

 

***

 

I demand to know what is so awesome about this thread O.O

 

Molestia

 

bye

 

---

 

You're a horrible person. Spiders are our friends, and Fred was more. Fred was YOUR friend. You think you can just say you're sad about it and it'll be fine? No, fuck you.

 

I hope you die in a ditch, and may a thousand Solifuges (closely related to spiders) devour your corpse in the most desecrating way they can thing of.

 

---

 

I'm so glad you can't see me well in that picture

 

 

All I have that won't get removed

 

 

Here's another one. It was from a troll that came here on 2/20/12.

 

 

 

And Statuses rock now.

 

---

 

[12:59:12 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: He blesses them by rubbing his bald head on their noses.

 

[11:18:34 PM] Arylett Dawnsborough: YAY

[11:18:36 PM] Arylett Dawnsborough: I AM THE SHIT KING

 

[10:08:32 PM] Kyronea: Who needs a toilet? I just used the floor.

 

[10:17:55 pm] Kyronea: Open the door, sit on the toilet, and shit. You keep your pants on.

 

[10:07:24 pm] Feld0: Try breaking the door.

[10:07:55 pm] Elvis: same thing as punching or kicking.

[10:08:03 pm] Arylett Dawnsborough: I broke my pants instead.

 

Arylett Dawnsborough says (8:42 AM)

A Canadian punched the crotch of a robot until it died.

Sounds like Feld0's life.

 

[31/05/2012 12:27:09] iTich: Y U CYUTE?

[31/05/2012 13:20:40] Tich: I UNNO Y U PONY

[17:58:11] iTich: I UNNO WANNA KISS?

[18:06:30] iTich: TOO LATE

[18:06:37] iTich: iTich kisses

[18:53:02] Tich: Did you just ponykiss me?

[18:53:18] iTich: Yes

[18:53:29] iTich: iTich tonguekisses

 

[2:36:14 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Don't be blowing on my mojo.

 

***

 

[17:47:17] Pencil Pie: Finland will be renamed into MufFinland after I become the ultimate ruler

[17:47:37] Pencil Pie: And then Derpy will be pressed in to all the coins.

[17:47:51] Pencil Pie: And monetary unit will be Derp.

[17:48:20] Pencil Pie: So then you can buy muffins with derps.

 

---

 

 

Moderators here are so silly

 

---

 

This is a list I have devised in the moderator's chat of the various levels of weirdness amongst moderators. I thought I'd show it to you guys for my own amusement. This list is in order from least weirdest mod to most weirdest:

• 19. Feld0 (Least Weirdest Mod)
• 18. Apple Bloom
• 17. Aureitas d'Aequitate
• 16. Ezynell
• 15. Swoop
• 14. Thereisnospoon303
• 13. Scootacool
• 12. New Calamity
• 11. Klopp
• 10. Little Miss Fluttershy
• 9. Jonke
• 8. Vexx3
• 7. Arylett Dawnsborough
• 6. Nico
• 5. Kyronea
• 4. Tich
• 3. Devin McCourty
• 2. Zoop
• 1. Tom the Diamond (Weirdest Mod!)

AHGHSJLXUIP

 

We already established on Skype that I'm not the weirdest mod! If anything I'm the most perfectly sanest mod! I mean, I'm not a masochist or anything, so that already makes me less weird the several mods up there!

 

>name is Trixie the Trixe

>normal

 

---

 

Alright everypony, Scootabloom dragged me here kicking and screaming encouraged me to come in this thread, so here I am.

 

I am Discord, bring me your virgins chocolate.

***

 

 

So, mister big guy who does stuff guy, do the moderators have a secret headquarters? I only ask because I want to send them delicious fruit pastries.

 

 

 

***

 

REAL MEN COMBINE EXPENSIVE HEADPHONES, LIKE SO: http://www.amazon.co...S/dp/B000EBBJ6Y

 

WITH REASONABLY PRICED MICROPHONE, LIKE SO: http://www.amazon.co...e/dp/B0012AUHXW

 

FOR THE ULTIMATE IN HIGH QUALITY HIGH COMFORT SUPERSTUFF

 

^ My setup right there. Fucking rocks.

 

AND DO NOT FORGET TO USE RIGHT NEXT TO THE MICROPHONE FOR BONUS POINTS.

 

Whats going on in this thread? Oh wait I forgot... Absolutely fucking everything.

 

NOTHING TO SEE HERE, CITIZEN. MOVE ALONG.

 

---

 

"What the hell is Scootacool doing?!" ... "What in the holy mother of ass?!"

 

- NC, in Skype

[9/9/2012 9:45:22 PM] Zoop: everything is okay.

[9/9/2012 9:45:28 PM] Zoop: there's nothing SYNful going on.

---

 

[2:46:32 AM] NewCalamity: [2:45 AM] Zoop: "killl all kids (flex)"

 

I really can't get over this.

[2:46:51 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: [2:47 AM] King K. Roop: "Way I see it: I have nothing against kids, but having people under 13 on the forum would be like having little kids running around a night club. Awkward."

 

Agreed.

[2:46:59 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Also, I'd baldinate Zoop again.

[2:47:03 AM] King K. Roop: I mean, well, it's not that big a problem now, but when people are around little kids, they act different.

[2:47:04 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: He is not meant to have hair.

[2:47:13 AM] Vexx3: http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Animorphs.+What+do+i+put+here_72d4f4_3709466.jpg

[2:47:25 AM] Ben (Klopp): XD

[2:47:35 AM] NewCalamity: Pent butter why

[2:47:40 AM] Scootacool:

[2:47:42 AM] Ben (Klopp): Pent butter?

[2:47:55 AM] Vexx3: http://24.media.tumb...7kc6xo1_250.jpg

[2:48:04 AM] Scootacool: I think it's like peanut butter only without a U

[2:48:09 AM] Ben (Klopp): What da hell is this?

[2:48:23 AM] Vexx3: jif why

[2:48:23 AM] NewCalamity: Some people never potato.

[2:48:28 AM | Edited 2:48:37 AM] NewCalamity: Some do...

[2:48:40 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Arylett Dawnsborough is totally confused.

[2:48:45 AM] Scootacool: I don't understand!

[2:48:46 AM] Ben (Klopp): I'm a Skippy guy, myself.

[2:48:55 AM] Ben (Klopp): SUper Chunky!

[2:49:01 AM] Scootacool: Scootacool head explodes

[2:49:08 AM] NewCalamity: I've never heard of either of those brands.

[2:49:34 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Uh... something about peanut butter, apparently.

[2:49:47 AM] Scootacool: Scootacool blinks slowly

[2:49:49 AM] Ben (Klopp): [2:50 AM] "NewCalamity: I've never heard of either of those brands."

 

But, Jif is what Choosy Moms choose! D:

[2:49:58 AM] Scootacool: Seems legit!

[2:50:08 AM] Vexx3: [2:48 AM] Scootacool: "I don't understand!"

 

None can rustle the triumverate

[2:50:21 AM] Scootacool: Deep, very deep.

[2:50:23 AM] NewCalamity: Our jimmies are eternal.

[2:50:25 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: This chat's making even less sense than the main chat.

[2:50:30 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Arylett Dawnsborough goes to the main chat, ironically.

[2:50:40 AM] Ben (Klopp): But srsly, why is a peanut butter jar turning into a golden retriever?

[2:50:40 AM] Vexx3: [2:50 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: "This chat's making even less sense than the main chat."

 

VICTORY!

[2:50:53 AM] NewCalamity: Pent butter why

[2:51:15 AM] NewCalamity: Wht is happen

[2:51:17 AM] Ben (Klopp): [2:51 AM] NewCalamity: "Pent butter why"

 

The question that may never be answered.

[2:51:51 AM | Edited 2:51:55 AM] Ben (Klopp): Also, it clearly says, "Pent buttr why"

[2:51:51 AM] Vexx3: chat.exe is not responding!

[2:52:06 AM] Vexx3: *wh y

[2:52:10 AM] Ben (Klopp): XD

[2:52:13 AM] Ben (Klopp): Yesh

 

---

 

Walked into work today wearing a large Abraham Lincoln mask, complete with my stupidly expensive douchebag sunglasses, a competing business' uniform, and battery powered speakers shoved into the top hat that I had blaring the national anthem, followed by the Star Wars Imperial Death March.

 

Lulz were had.

 

---

 

 

[8:58:06 PM] Twilie'Zorah vas Harmony: Okay, shower time seeya later!

[8:58:10 PM] Djenty: wat

[8:58:16 PM] Djenty: what were you doing minutes ago

[8:58:17 PM | Edited 8:58:21 PM] Djenty: lol

[8:58:22 PM] Electrobolt: Don't drop the soap

[8:58:33 PM] Djenty: [8:58 PM] Electrobolt:

 

<<< Don't drop the soap :PDon't worry. He will.

[8:58:37 PM] Djenty: And I'll be there.

 

---

 

Wonder if someone should bash their face repeatedly to the wall based on the fact that there are walls.

 

---

 

***

 

---

 

"NewCalamity: Why am I watching a child get abused?"

 

"Zoop: Because it’s funny."

 

- Skype, March 30th

 

---

 

 

***

 

 

[10/14/2012 8:14:51 PM] Zoop: hookay

[10/14/2012 8:14:53 PM] Zoop: so like

[10/14/2012 8:15:03 PM] Zoop: my friends dragged me to an anime con, yeah?

[10/14/2012 8:15:15 PM] Zoop: it was pretty boring for me, but whatever. the cosplayers were fun

[10/14/2012 8:15:36 PM] Zoop: anyway, after con-going and stuff for the day we decided to get some dinner at the cheesecake factory in the same mall that the convention was at

[10/14/2012 8:16:02 PM] Zoop: but there was like a thirty minute wait to be seated - no biggie though, they gave us a lil beeper thing that’d let us know when it was our turn to get seated

[10/14/2012 8:16:17 PM] Zoop: and we left to kill some time by lurking around a nearby Barnes and Noble

[10/14/2012 8:16:29 PM] Zoop: so we’re walkin around doing whatever

[10/14/2012 8:16:41 PM] Zoop: and we end up in the philosophy section, where I notice they’ve got all of their bibles and such

[10/14/2012 8:16:58 PM] Zoop: so, being the preacher that I am, I took one of them and started to loudly recite from it

[10/14/2012 8:17:17 PM] Zoop: I shut up after a couple minutes ‘cause I notice a couple folks coming our way

[10/14/2012 8:17:32 PM] Zoop: one was a very overweight girl dressed up like princess peach from mario.

[10/14/2012 8:17:37 PM] Zoop: the other didn’t have a costume

[10/14/2012 8:17:49 PM] Zoop: so they end up looking at the same shelf that my friends and I are at

[10/14/2012 8:18:03 PM] Zoop: the princess suddenly squeels really loudly

[10/14/2012 8:18:07 PM] Zoop: and starts pointing at a book

[10/14/2012 8:18:26 PM] Zoop: ‘”OH EM GEEEEE, THIS BOOK! IT’S ‘THE PHILOSOPHY OF ANIME’ OMGOMGOMG”

[10/14/2012 8:18:46 PM] Zoop: at this point I’m just standing like right next to her holding a bible and blinking

[10/14/2012 8:18:55 PM] Zoop: then she starts looking at the other books

[10/14/2012 8:19:54 PM] Zoop: and she’s reading off “the philosophy of x’, ‘the philosophy of y’....

[10/14/2012 8:20:00 PM] Zoop: finally she sees one and she giggles

[10/14/2012 8:20:01 PM] Zoop: and is like

[10/14/2012 8:20:08 PM] Zoop: “OOO THE PHILOSOPHY OF THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE LOL”

[10/14/2012 8:20:14 PM] Zoop: at this point her friend chimes in and is like

[10/14/2012 8:20:20 PM] Zoop: “UHMMM WHATS THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE”

[10/14/2012 8:20:28 PM] Zoop: at this, princess peach starts laughing really hard

[10/14/2012 8:20:29 PM] John Navarro: .-.

[10/14/2012 8:20:30 PM] NewCalamity: NewCalamity prepares noose

[10/14/2012 8:20:44 PM] John Navarro: ^

[10/14/2012 8:20:54 PM] NewCalamity: I've heard this already and I still feel bad.

[10/14/2012 8:20:59 PM] Zoop: “OMG YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE IS? :D (rofl) (party) (chuckle) IT’S LIKE.... LIKE... YOU KNOW, ALEXANDER THE GREAT AND STUFF (sun)”

[10/14/2012 8:21:35 PM] Zoop: at this point I just kind of stare at her, set the bible down, and walk away

[10/14/2012 8:22:18 PM] John Navarro: X_x

[10/14/2012 8:22:22 PM] NewCalamity: ... and then return with an automatic weapon.

 

***

 

[10/14/2012 11:35:24 PM] Zoop: VOODOO CHIPS ARE FUCKING DOPE AS SHIT YO

 

***

 

[10/14/2012 4:02:23 AM] iZoop: Chigs is NC's spike

[10/14/2012 4:02:37 AM] iZoop: Alternatively his Opal.

[10/14/2012 4:02:45 AM | Edited 4:02:57 AM] NewCalamity: Opal I guess.

[10/14/2012 4:03:50 AM] iZoop: Chigens. Meow for NC

[10/14/2012 4:04:01 AM] Jonke (Dreamwalker): xD

[10/14/2012 4:04:24 AM] Chigens and Kay: :3

 

 

---

 

SO MANY ZOOPS

 

 

***

 

Swoop describes his helpful contributions to the Skype group operation following the closure of the chat

 

 

Step one: Make Zoop a mod

 

Step two: Make Swoop a mod

 

Step three: Watch everyone make dumb jokes

 

 

Edited October 15, 2012 by Star Weaver

[XUNUSEDXXX 3,459]

Wait a sec I'll post here just lemme find ones that I've laughed at

[Haven Celestii 9,385]

You're a horrible person. Spiders are our friends, and Fred was more. Fred was YOUR friend. You think you can just say you're sad about it and it'll be fine? No, fuck you.

 

I hope you die in a ditch, and may a thousand Solifuges (closely related to spiders) devour your corpse in the most desecrating way they can thing of.

 

[Starshine 16,333]

Sometimes I wonder if adding quoted posts will re-notice the older ones o_o

 

Anyway, here goes the newest batch. Most of them was found on Cloudsdale Colosseum

[XUNUSEDXXX 3,459]

 

 

Moderators here are so silly

 

This is a list I have devised in the moderator's chat of the various levels of weirdness amongst moderators. I thought I'd show it to you guys for my own amusement. This list is in order from least weirdest mod to most weirdest:

• 19. Feld0 (Least Weirdest Mod)
• 18. Apple Bloom
• 17. Aureitas d'Aequitate
• 16. Ezynell
• 15. Swoop
• 14. Thereisnospoon303
• 13. Scootacool
• 12. New Calamity
• 11. Klopp
• 10. Little Miss Fluttershy
• 9. Jonke
• 8. Vexx3
• 7. Arylett Dawnsborough
• 6. Nico
• 5. Kyronea
• 4. Tich
• 3. Devin McCourty
• 2. Zoop
• 1. Tom the Diamond (Weirdest Mod!)

>name is Trixie the Trixe

>normal

 

Alright everypony, Scootabloom dragged me here kicking and screaming encouraged me to come in this thread, so here I am.

 

I am Discord, bring me your virgins chocolate.

 

[MVC NVMXD JVRXD 2,406]

If I get a bunch of notifications.. :|

[I used to be a stranger 7,993]

"Attention passengers on the outside deck who are smoking the unusual tobacco: please move away from the intake vents."

[Starshine 16,333]

Update! I'll take off the notification hook from the quotes, so there would be no notification

 

"Attention passengers on the outside deck who are smoking the unusual tobacco: please move away from the intake vents."

 

No sir, I'm not smoking anything yet :<

[Haven Celestii 9,385]

Now i just talk funny and tell people their clothes and such suck, like real life

 

[XUNUSEDXXX 3,459]

Pretty sure there's another pages...

 

Here you go!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Assault rifle <15>

Machete <6>

My friend Sakamoto <15>

Any kind of armor you want <14>

I'll pick the Grey Knight's Terminator armor

 

Let the killing begin

 

[Zoop 8,384]

Why can't I double brohoof posts?

[XUNUSEDXXX 3,459]

Why can't I double brohoof posts?

 

Blame the admins...

 

Oh shit

[Killian Jones 2,655]

I do no regret making out with myself. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

[XUNUSEDXXX 3,459]

The great thing is that there was no white text.

Edited September 16, 2012 by Scootaluna

[MVC NVMXD JVRXD 2,406]

The great thing is that there was no white text.

 

I have my ways... Edited September 16, 2012 by Djent Doggy Dogg

[XUNUSEDXXX 3,459]

 

And from Star Weaver:

 

[I used to be a stranger 7,993]

I enjoy being a millionaire very much. Mainly on account of the millions of dollars that I own. It reminds me of my wealth.

[Starshine 16,333]

REAL MEN COMBINE EXPENSIVE HEADPHONES, LIKE SO: http://www.amazon.co...S/dp/B000EBBJ6Y

 

WITH REASONABLY PRICED MICROPHONE, LIKE SO: http://www.amazon.co...e/dp/B0012AUHXW

 

FOR THE ULTIMATE IN HIGH QUALITY HIGH COMFORT SUPERSTUFF

 

^ My setup right there. Fucking rocks.

 

AND DO NOT FORGET TO USE RIGHT NEXT TO THE MICROPHONE FOR BONUS POINTS.

 

Whats going on in this thread? Oh wait I forgot... Absolutely fucking everything.

 

NOTHING TO SEE HERE, CITIZEN. MOVE ALONG.

 

 

---

 

Mods be crazy

[Zoop 8,384]

"What the hell is Scootacool doing?!" ... "What in the holy mother of ass?!"

 

- NC, in Skype

[Akemi Homura 7,680]

I think hiding the Royal Council and Staff Lounge was a bad idea... ._.

 

Zoop's terrible pun.

 

[9/9/2012 9:45:22 PM] Zoop: everything is okay.

[9/9/2012 9:45:28 PM] Zoop: there's nothing SYNful going on.

 

Edited September 18, 2012 by Devin McCourty

[NewCalamity 3,454]

[2:46:32 AM] NewCalamity: [2:45 AM] Zoop: "killl all kids (flex)"

 

I really can't get over this.

[2:46:51 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: [2:47 AM] King K. Roop: "Way I see it: I have nothing against kids, but having people under 13 on the forum would be like having little kids running around a night club. Awkward."

 

Agreed.

[2:46:59 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Also, I'd baldinate Zoop again.

[2:47:03 AM] King K. Roop: I mean, well, it's not that big a problem now, but when people are around little kids, they act different.

[2:47:04 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: He is not meant to have hair.

[2:47:13 AM] Vexx3: http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Animorphs.+What+do+i+put+here_72d4f4_3709466.jpg

[2:47:25 AM] Ben (Klopp): XD

[2:47:35 AM] NewCalamity: Pent butter why

[2:47:40 AM] Scootacool:

[2:47:42 AM] Ben (Klopp): Pent butter?

[2:47:55 AM] Vexx3: http://24.media.tumb...7kc6xo1_250.jpg

[2:48:04 AM] Scootacool: I think it's like peanut butter only without a U

[2:48:09 AM] Ben (Klopp): What da hell is this?

[2:48:23 AM] Vexx3: jif why

[2:48:23 AM] NewCalamity: Some people never potato.

[2:48:28 AM | Edited 2:48:37 AM] NewCalamity: Some do...

[2:48:40 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Arylett Dawnsborough is totally confused.

[2:48:45 AM] Scootacool: I don't understand!

[2:48:46 AM] Ben (Klopp): I'm a Skippy guy, myself.

[2:48:55 AM] Ben (Klopp): SUper Chunky!

[2:49:01 AM] Scootacool: Scootacool head explodes

[2:49:08 AM] NewCalamity: I've never heard of either of those brands.

[2:49:34 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Uh... something about peanut butter, apparently.

[2:49:47 AM] Scootacool: Scootacool blinks slowly

[2:49:49 AM] Ben (Klopp): [2:50 AM] "NewCalamity: I've never heard of either of those brands."

 

But, Jif is what Choosy Moms choose! D:

[2:49:58 AM] Scootacool: Seems legit!

[2:50:08 AM] Vexx3: [2:48 AM] Scootacool: "I don't understand!"

 

None can rustle the triumverate

[2:50:21 AM] Scootacool: Deep, very deep.

[2:50:23 AM] NewCalamity: Our jimmies are eternal.

[2:50:25 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: This chat's making even less sense than the main chat.

[2:50:30 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: Arylett Dawnsborough goes to the main chat, ironically.

[2:50:40 AM] Ben (Klopp): But srsly, why is a peanut butter jar turning into a golden retriever?

[2:50:40 AM] Vexx3: [2:50 AM] Arylett Dawnsborough: "This chat's making even less sense than the main chat."

 

VICTORY!

[2:50:53 AM] NewCalamity: Pent butter why

[2:51:15 AM] NewCalamity: Wht is happen

[2:51:17 AM] Ben (Klopp): [2:51 AM] NewCalamity: "Pent butter why"

 

The question that may never be answered.

[2:51:51 AM | Edited 2:51:55 AM] Ben (Klopp): Also, it clearly says, "Pent buttr why"

[2:51:51 AM] Vexx3: chat.exe is not responding!

[2:52:06 AM] Vexx3: *wh y

[2:52:10 AM] Ben (Klopp): XD

[2:52:13 AM] Ben (Klopp): Yesh

[MVC NVMXD JVRXD 2,406]

[8:58:06 PM] Twilie'Zorah vas Harmony: Okay, shower time seeya later!

[8:58:10 PM] Djenty: wat

[8:58:16 PM] Djenty: what were you doing minutes ago

[8:58:17 PM | Edited 8:58:21 PM] Djenty: lol

[8:58:22 PM] Electrobolt: Don't drop the soap

[8:58:33 PM] Djenty: [8:58 PM] Electrobolt:

 

<<< Don't drop the soap :PDon't worry. He will.

[8:58:37 PM] Djenty: And I'll be there.

 

Sorry for posting this guise, but I got a good lol.

[Starshine 16,333]

Walked into work today wearing a large Abraham Lincoln mask, complete with my stupidly expensive douchebag sunglasses, a competing business' uniform, and battery powered speakers shoved into the top hat that I had blaring the national anthem, followed by the Star Wars Imperial Death March.

 

Lulz were had.

 

[Zoop 8,384]

 

I wore a massive vinyl Burger King mask the year before.

[Starshine 16,333]

I wore a massive vinyl Burger King mask the year before.

We need a photographic evidence, now

 

---

 

Wonder if someone should bash their face repeatedly to the wall based on the fact that there are walls.

 

Edited September 29, 2012 by Star Weaver